Mystery Science Theater 3000: FINAL JUSTICE

April 5, 2018 12:35 AM - Season 10, Episode 8

"His name is Thomas Jefferson Geronimo. His brand of justice doesn't stop at the Texas border." A Texas sheriff played by Joe Don Baker (Mitchell himself) is assigned to escort a mob boss to Italy, but the plane gets sidetracked to Malta, resulting in a series of cartoon episodes where he tries to catch him but keeps getting arrested, darn it! This is the episode where Crow and Servo destroy Goosio, beloved children's character of Malta. Episode 1008 is available on YouTube. Premiered June 20, 1999. Five episodes left.

Episode 1008 FINAL JUSTICE
Satellite News - Mighty Jack's Episode Review - War of the Colossal Fan Guide - TVTropes

Mike with the ACEG reflections, again:

I can't tell you how delighted we were at the prospect of another Joe Don Baker film. Mitchell was a joy to do, and many people have told me how much they enjoyed watching our treatment of it. Final Justice on the other hand, was like having a knitting needle pounded slowly into your knee-cap, and I wouldn't be surprised if people approach me after viewing it and simply slap my face indignantly, like that woman in Jaws did to Sheriff Brody.
As for the host segments, all went smoothly, and the only thing I can remember is that we had some new interns, sharp people, who picked up on our love for meat. We would get huge stacks of meat for breakfast! Shaved beef and turkey, spiced gently, lovingly and piled high on clean, white plates by eager and talented young men and women! I wish you could have been there. Some enterprising young Turk even took to placing a slice of meat on a bare, flat palm, spreading it with flavored cream cheese and simply rolling it up. A "meat roll-up", we'd call it.
Anyway, that's what I remember about Final Justice.

Movie
Daddy-O's Drive-In Dirt
Rotten Tomatoes (Critics N/A, Viewers 13% -- the movie cover to this one is wrong) - Wikipedia - TVTropes
IMDB (1985, 2.0 stars)
"Homicidal Sheriff Thomas Jefferson Geronimo is tasked with escorting a mobster to Malta; when the prisoner escapes, Geronimo goes rogue to catch him."
Directed and written by Greydon Clark. Starring Joe Don Baker, Rossano Brazzi and Venantino Venantini.

posted by JHarris (8 comments total)

"Nobody move! I'm Jerry Reed!" gets me every time.
posted by AlonzoMosleyFBI at 9:22 AM on April 5, 2018

The thing that never stops being hilarious to me is Goosio's death. "Ohhhhh, why you hurt Goooosiooooooo…"
posted by CheesesOfBrazil at 9:41 AM on April 5, 2018 [4 favorites]

I was excited for another Joe Don Baker film, but I'm afraid this is not a fave.
posted by Chrysostom at 9:53 AM on April 5, 2018

I loved the callback where Mike thought it was his turn to escape after watching a really bad Joe Don Baker movie, so he's sitting in the water heater and left the bots a plaque with a quote from Herbie The Love Bug.
posted by Servo5678 at 12:51 PM on April 5, 2018 [1 favorite]

I love this one because the riffs are really on point but it absolutely blows my mind that the movie actually got made or that anybody ever thought that this was something anybody wanted to see.
posted by Pope Guilty at 1:37 PM on April 5, 2018 [2 favorites]

Based on the experience of the MSTers, I'm preparing piles of meat for tonight's MST3K Club showing... I was in Costco earlier today and took advantage of sale prices on shaved turkey & ham and dry salami... I'd already recently gotten pepperoni, bbq shredded beef and cream cheese (no expectations, it was just on sale)... so my theater snacking tonight is going be totally meaty and alternately 'rolled-up'. Also, in honor of the movie's setting, Malta, I wish I had a chocolate malt...
posted by oneswellfoop at 2:45 PM on April 5, 2018 [2 favorites]

At 7 PM Eastern time (about 40 minutes from now) it'll be time for MST Club, at https://cytu.be/r/Metafilter_MST3KClub, where we watch that week's episode with one other, and other assorted internet stuff. This week's show is 306 TIME OF THE APES (we haven't seen that one lately, right?) and 1008 FINAL JUSTICE. Hope you can make it!
posted by JHarris at 3:18 PM on April 5, 2018

I just stopped in to say I was seriously thinking of making some meat roll-ups, but I see foop beat me too it. Luckily, I have some single-portion packages of Whoppers left over from last Halloween, so I got the Malted thingy covered.
posted by valkane at 3:58 PM on April 5, 2018 [1 favorite]