42 posts tagged with clayton and joel.
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Mystery Science Theater 3000: FUGITIVE ALIEN  Rewatch   Season 3, Ep 10

Rewatch! Sunday-- Ken is a Star Wolf, a member of a ruthless band of space raiders from the planet Valna, who unexpectedly develops a conscience and saves an Earth woman and sun from a comrade. He is labeled a traitor and is force to team up with hard-drinking earthling Captain Joe and his crew on the old spaceship Bacchus III. I love this episode. The movie is goofy but watchable (and as Joel and co note in the sequel, the music legitimately rocks), the jokes are funny and on-point, and in a series filled to overflowing with memorable moments, gives us several great ones, culminating in the classic lyric: "HE TRIIIED TO KILL ME WITH A FORKLIFT!" Olé! Previously Below the fold, some comments about the movie. [more inside]
posted by JHarris on Jul 11, 2020 - 4 comments

Mystery Science Theater 3000: THE AMAZING COLOSSAL MAN  Rewatch   Season 3, Ep 9

Rewatch! Thursday-- A film from the most prolific director of MST3K movies, Bert I. Gordon. Glenn Manning is a man with a big problem, getting bigger: he was exposed to an experimental weapon that makes him grow and grow and grow. A better movie than its sequel, War of the Colossal Beast, but often in it shadow because WotCB contains perhaps the most popular short in MST's history. Previously
posted by JHarris on Jul 9, 2020 - 2 comments

Mystery Science Theater 3000: GAMERA VS. GAOS  Rewatch   Season 3, Ep 8

Re-rewatch! On Sunday: like Godzilla, Gamera progressed through his career from being a force of destruction to being a protector of humanity, defending Japanese cities against other kaiju. Gaos (alternately spelled Gyaos) may be the most iconic and effective of Gamera's foes, being a sort of giant vampire bat thing with laser eyes. Sadly, the annoying kid Gamerafriends are back after their absence from Gamera vs. Barugon. Previously - Also previously
posted by JHarris on Jul 4, 2020 - 2 comments

Mystery Science Theater 3000: DADDY-O  Rewatch   Season 3, Ep 7

Rewatch! A guy is forced off the road by a lady, so naturally they decide to drag race. Things progress in the natural manner, so he ends up going undercover in a nightclub to find out who killed his friend, and the lady, who's kind of sweet on him despite everything, helps. Has the short Alphabet Antics, the first of the show's many educational shorts. Previously
posted by JHarris on Jul 2, 2020 - 3 comments

Mystery Science Theater 3000: TIME OF THE APES  Rewatch   Season 3, Ep 6

Rewatch! Tonight: another classic early episode, in this movie (really episodes of a Japanese show stitched together by Sandy Frank), a couple of Japanese kids visit their uncle in their high-tech monkey freezing compound. Then an earthquake hits, and the two and a lab assistant seek refuge in a freezing chamber. They're flash-frozen and wake up in a future where APES RULE THE WORRRLD. But there's also a ton of other stuff going on: human Godo the survivalist, Pepe the friendly monkeyperson, vengeful ape Gaybar(?), the stern but ultimately helpful leader ape, and the deus ex machina-ish "UECOM" ("Yukon?") that hovers in the sky. Completely bonkers. Previously
posted by JHarris on Jun 28, 2020 - 3 comments

Mystery Science Theater 3000: STRANDED IN SPACE  Rewatch   Season 3, Ep 5

Rewatch! An astronaut survives a crash, but on waking up Earth doesn't seem to be as he remembers it... it turns out he's on "Terra," on the other side of the sun from Earth, which is a lot like Earth in a lot of ways (lots of Chryslers, for example), but is being run by one of those dystopian states that everyone was afraid of before we realized the fall of civilization would take the form of a social media meltdown. Previously
posted by JHarris on Jun 25, 2020 - 2 comments

Mystery Science Theater 3000: GAMERA VS. BARUGON  Rewatch   Season 3, Ep 4

Re-rewatch! A gigantic sort of allegator-dog attacks Japan, and in a twist (whaaa?) the previously aggressive monster turtle Gamera is the only thing that can stop it. At least there's no obnoxious kid this time. Previously one and Previously two
posted by JHarris on Jun 21, 2020 - 1 comment

Mystery Science Theater 3000: POD PEOPLE  Rewatch   Season 3, Ep 3

Re-rewatch! Four different subplots kind of meander into orbit with each other in this dubbed French/Spanish movie. Movie A: poachers in the woods encounter and break the eggs of an unworldly creature. Movie B: singers on a trip in the woods have a deadly run-in with that creature. Movie C: a lonely young boy befriends another creature of the same species. Movie D: the boy's father noisily conflicts with the lead singer from Movie B. It's another episode from a time in the show's history when almost every episode became a classic. But as for the movie itself... (O.K. sign) It stinks! It's as disjointed as it was because originally it was supposed to just be a horror movie, but then when ET came out a hasty story adjustment was made to try to get some of those cute alien movie dollars. Previously and also previously
posted by JHarris on Jun 18, 2020 - 7 comments

Mystery Science Theater 3000: GAMERA  Rewatch   Season 3, Ep 2

Re-rewatch! A giant turtle terrorizes Japan while a sad little kid is told he can't keep his pet turtle. Their paths cross, and now the military tries to save Japan from kaiju destruction while the kid helps as a kind of giant turtle expert. It's pretty ridiculous, but it's only the beginning of a series of Gamera movies. MST would eventually do five of them, and they're some of the show's most iconic episodes. Previously
posted by JHarris on Jun 14, 2020 - 2 comments

Mystery Science Theater 3000: CAVE DWELLERS  Rewatch   Season 3, Ep 1

Rewatch! The first classic episode in a season of classic episodes, a dull old guy ("Akronos") living in a prehistoric time is attacked by a John Saxon-type ("Zor") over a "geometric nucleus," so he sends his daughter Mila, who wears a hubcap on her chest, to go fetch Ator and his faithful male companion ("Thong," really) to save him. Mila impresses Ator by demonstrating her knowledge of the chemistry of human filth. The titular cave dwellers are only a stop-off point halfway through the film, there's a snake puppet, and an unexpected appearance by a hang glider. The whole thing is ridiculous. It's indicative of how disjointed this movie is that, despite it being a classic episode and one of my favorites, I still had to look up the names of the old guy, the bad guy and the girl! This movie is actually the sequel to the movie used in the last episode of Season 12. Previously
posted by JHarris on Jun 10, 2020 - 2 comments

Mystery Science Theater 3000: GODZILLA VS. THE SEA MONSTER  Season 2, Ep 13

Rewatch! On Sunday: Godzilla has to share screen time in this one with terrorists and natives and Mothra. Compared to the excellent and bonkers Godzilla vs Megalon this one's so-so, I think at least. Previously
posted by JHarris on Jun 4, 2020 - 0 comments

Mystery Science Theater 3000: GODZILLA VS. MEGALON  Rewatch   Season 2, Ep 12

Rewatch! On Thursday (today!): A truly crazy movie, the underground kingdom of "Seatopia?" Which is run by... Dorf? is upset at nuclear tests, so calls upon their giant monster Megalon to attack the surface world. They also target a couple of... scientists? Who make... water toys? For a... kid? That they raise? I mean that's great sure, but it's not really defined what's going on. And a humidifier? hangs from the ceiling by a chain? in their... lab? Anyway they make the robot Jet Jaguar who goes and gets Godzilla so they can have a fite that's the real movie. It's batshit crazy, but a great episode! Previously [more inside]
posted by JHarris on Jun 4, 2020 - 1 comment

Mystery Science Theater 3000: FIRST SPACESHIP ON VENUS  Rewatch   Season 2, Ep 11

Rewatch! There are few MST movies that are as full of ridiculous crap as this one, it's kind of amazing. On Earth a space message is recovered from Venus to which scientists affix the catchy name the "cosmic document." They don't know what it says yet, but they decide to bring it along with them on a trip to its home planet to meet its makers. Along the way we meet a team of people with the huge letter 'A' on their uniforms, an international team of weirdos, a chess playing robot that can't handle losing, a vaguely oppressive sleep computer, the oppressive crib mobile of Venus, a flood of killer goop and alien architecture straight out of Dr. Seuss. In the end the cosmic document gets decoded and turns out to be plans to destroy the world, so, that's nice. Previously [more inside]
posted by JHarris on May 28, 2020 - 3 comments

Mystery Science Theater 3000: KING DINOSAUR  Rewatch   Season 2, Ep 10

Rewatch! The first of eight MST movies directed by Bert I. Gordon, who certainly had a prolific career. In this one, space explorer land on Planet Nova and bring "civilization" to it by obliterating its native population of awesome dinosaurs with a nuclear weapon. Hey, it was the fifties. There's an automobile safety short that's kind of goofy too. Previously [more inside]
posted by JHarris on May 28, 2020 - 3 comments

Mystery Science Theater 3000: THE HELLCATS  Rewatch   Season 2, Ep 9

Rewatch! On Sunday: A kind of counterpart to The Sidehackers, directed both by its director Gus Trikonis and starring Ross Hagan, who played Rommel. Also, produced by Anthony Cardoza, who produced the Coleman Francis movies! A weird film, and the most biker-y of MST's three biker movies. Previously
posted by JHarris on May 20, 2020 - 1 comment

Mystery Science Theater 3000: LOST CONTINENT  Rewatch   Season 2, Ep 8

Rewatch! On Thursday: an airplace with important experiments crashes on a strange mountain plateau, and science types have to go up there and get them. While there's dinosaurs up there that cause them trouble, minute for minute, the true experience of this movie can be summed up in two words: ROCK CLIMBING. So much tedium that getting through it turns into a joke in itself. Previously [more inside]
posted by JHarris on May 20, 2020 - 1 comment

Mystery Science Theater 3000: THE SIDEHACKERS  Rewatch   Season 2, Ep 2

Rewatch! On Thursday: Rommel is a mechanic who participates in weird motorcycle races in his off time. He introduces the unstable J.C. and his gang to his sport, but events take a violent turn. A grimy and depressing take of shattered love and revenge. How did this episode become one of Mystery Science Theater 3000's earliest beloved classics? A lot of it has to do with the sport of sidehacking depicted in the movie, which is two-person motorcycling on a dirt track, with a driver and a rider who leans their butt way out on a sidehack to balance the bike out on sharp turns. An obviously extremely dangerous sport that's the subject of some hilarious extended riff runs. Previously.
posted by JHarris on Apr 30, 2020 - 7 comments

Mystery Science Theater 3000: ROCKETSHIP X-M  Rewatch   Season 2, Ep 1

Rewatch! Operator error sends the Earth's first ship to the moon, 828 thousand miles away, instead to Mars, which is at best 33.9 million miles away and usually much further. That's some error; some scientists would give multiple limbs to be able to make errors like that. It's the first episode of Season Two, considered the point where Mystery Science Theater 3000 started to become really good, although the movie here is kind of dull. Next time.... Previously. Remember: for the time being we're also doing Sunday shows, so if you want to watch this one you'll want to show up tonight. [more inside]
posted by JHarris on Apr 26, 2020 - 0 comments

Mystery Science Theater 3000: THE BLACK SCORPION  Rewatch   Season 1, Ep 13

Rewatch! Big critters from out of a volcano attack the lands south of the border. It's the last episode of Season One. Previously [more inside]
posted by JHarris on Apr 23, 2020 - 0 comments

Mystery Science Theater 3000: UNTAMED YOUTH  Rewatch   Season 1, Ep 12

Rewatch! On Sunday [4/19]: A home for troubled teens is actually a work farm run by unscrupulous adults. Starring MST3K favorite Mamie Van Doren, who is still alive and kicking as of this writing! This movie marks the show's beginning to branch out to other genres of cinema, here, the teensploitation movie. The bad guy's surname is Tropp; having a name that ends with a doubled hard consonant is one of those sure-fire signs of cinema evil. Previously. Two more episodes in Season One.
posted by JHarris on Apr 15, 2020 - 1 comment

Mystery Science Theater 3000: MOON ZERO TWO  Rewatch   Season 1, Ep 11

Rewatch! On Thursday [4/16]: It's class warfare on the moon! A working-day moon savager is hired by rich-guy "Hundred Percent" Hubbard to help them crash a meteor made of gemstone on the moon. Problem is, the plot on which they crash is already claimed by a miner, Wild West style. Nefarious schemes are afoot up there in no-atmosphere zero-G. An okay movie made ridiculous by things like scantily-clad moon dancers and a board game called (groan) "Moonopoly." It's still Season One, but the riffing has improved a lot by this point. Three more episodes until Season Two! Previously.
posted by JHarris on Apr 15, 2020 - 5 comments

Mystery Science Theater 3000: ROBOT HOLOCAUST  Rewatch   Season 1, Ep 10

Rewatch! One of the best season one episodes, and at the time/for a while the newest movie MST had done (the turnaround time was but three years), a bunch of people in goofy costumes traipse around a city park somewhere on a journey to the power station ruled by the eeevil Dark One and his second-in-command Valeria, who speaks her Rs as Ws like Elmer Fudd and the Homestar Runner. An amazingly silly movie, released directly to VHS. Previously. This episode will be a Sunday show. MST Club news inside-- [more inside]
posted by JHarris on Apr 9, 2020 - 3 comments

Mystery Science Theater 3000: PROJECT MOONBASE  Rewatch   Season 1, Ep 9

Rewatch! Poor Commander Brietis has the misfortune to be a women space officer in a man's (specifically, Robert Heinlein's) world. Her peers all casually call her "Bright Eyes," and her commanding officer actually threatens to spank her at one point. But in the end she and a fellow astronaut get stranded together on the moon, and Madame President (whose existence I guess was supposed to make up for how badly Brietis is treated) demands that they be married to avoid a scandal, which they agree to because they're sweet on each other. A disheartening movie, which make wisecracks from an orbiting human and his automated mocking machines all the more welcome. Previously.
posted by JHarris on Apr 9, 2020 - 4 comments

Mystery Science Theater 3000: THE SLIME PEOPLE  Rewatch   Season 1, Ep 8

Rewatch! It's like a zombie movie but not, and from before that became a genre! You might consider it ahead of its time, or you might consider that zombie movies were never all that to begin with. It's another first season episode, when the guys and robots were still finding their feet and/or hoverskirts. Previously. [more inside]
posted by JHarris on Apr 2, 2020 - 4 comments

Mystery Science Theater 3000: ROBOT MONSTER  Rewatch   Season 1, Ep 7

Rewatch! We're baaaack.... A alien invader (guy in a gorilla suit with a fishbowl on his head) called Ro-Man destroys everyone on Earth except for a family that lives in walking distance of his cave (which has a bubble machine in front of it). The family tries to thwart Ro-Man's attempt to wipe them out, until Ro-Man gets a crush on the family's teenage daughter. At what point on the graph do "must" and "cannot" meet? In the end it's all a dream had by a comic-addled young boy. Up until this point MST had shown bad movies, but this was the first truly transcendent example they did. Some have called it the worst movie ever made. Enjoy! Also has two Radar Men From the Moon shorts. Previously [more inside]
posted by JHarris on Mar 26, 2020 - 8 comments

Mystery Science Theater 3000: THE CRAWLING HAND  Rewatch   Season 1, Ep 6

Rewatch! An astronaut crashes to earth and dies, all except for his hand (or hand and forearm, depending on the shot). It strangles people then hooks up with a teen to do more stranglin'. In the end it gets eaten by a cat, saving the world. Good kitty! This is an important episode in that it's the first one that sets up the "style" of the show in almost all later episodes, the opening going directly into the theater tunnel, and Joel explains the premise, really for the first time on cable. Also, the movie features the song Surfin' Bird. Previously. ----- In other news, for the extent of the pandemic, the MST Club video room will be open between shows with a playlist of as-broadcast MST episodes, funny YouTube finds, and other special appearances, for bored social distancers dropping-in. "Enjoy!"
posted by JHarris on Mar 18, 2020 - 2 comments

Mystery Science Theater 3000: THE CORPSE VANISHES  Rewatch   Season 1, Ep 5

Rewatch! Bela Lugosi plays a mad scientist who extracts brain juice from young brides to keep his wife young, because that's a thing that works. Come on, if it did Trump would be trying to suck it out of people's heads with a drinking straw. Both this and the previous movie are among the oldest films MST ever did, made in 1942. There's another Commando Cody short too, and some classic sketches, such as the robots saying bedtime prayers and the haircut bit. Previously
posted by JHarris on Mar 12, 2020 - 3 comments

Mystery Science Theater 3000: WOMEN OF THE PREHISTORIC PLANET  Rewatch   Season 1, Ep 4

Rewatch! Space people crash on a planet, and leave behind a man and woman. The departing commander names the planet Earth, making the left-behinds Adam and Eve. Except since this is obviously before any terrestrial languages how did that name come down to us? And there are neanderthals on the planet too. It doesn't make a whole lot of sense, is what I'm saying. At least it's in color. This is actually the last episode made of the first season, so it's not as quiet as some other 1st season episodes. This is the episode that gives MST its most popular catchphrase, Hikeeba! Previously [more inside]
posted by JHarris on Mar 5, 2020 - 3 comments

Mystery Science Theater 3000: THE MAD MONSTER  Rewatch   Season 1, Ep 3

Rewatch! An amiable handyman is turned into a furred killer by virtue of a syringe of Wolf Juice, in service to that diabolical process called science. When it is proclaimed of our our somewhat-hairy, yet still humanoid, victim that he has "become a wolf," it is a profoundly silly moment. Comes with Pt. 2 of Radar Men From The Moon. Previously [more inside]
posted by JHarris on Feb 27, 2020 - 3 comments

Mystery Science Theater 3000: THE ROBOT VS THE AZTEC MUMMY  Rewatch   Season 1, Ep 2

Rewatch! Evil Dr. Krupp, aka "The Bat" continues his plans to steal a treasure from the body of an Aztec mummy. This time he builds a robot to do it for him, which, why? Sell the robot, get more money than the treasure is worth! No matter. He's opposed by the virtuous Dr. Almada and the mummy, Popoca, itself. Also riffed is the first part of Commando Cody serial Radar Men From The Moon. Previously
posted by JHarris on Feb 20, 2020 - 2 comments

Mystery Science Theater 3000: THE CRAWLING EYE  Rewatch   Season 1, Ep 1

Rewatch! Ambulatory eyeballs with tentacles descend from space and menace the inhabitants of a mountain town. It's the first cable episode again, and as before, it's kind of a tough row to hoe. Previously [more inside]
posted by JHarris on Feb 13, 2020 - 5 comments

Mystery Science Theater 3000: MITCHELL  Rewatch   Season 5, Ep 12

Rewatch! Joe Don Baker IS Mitchell, a cop that doesn't play by the rules. For example, the rules about drinking on the job. The rules about sleeping with prostitutes. The rules about interacting with other human beings, especially kids. Certainly the rules about nutrition and hygiene. There is a story here about a drug dealer and his henchman who Mitchell seems like is almost trying to annoy into turning themselves in. In the end the lasting impression caused by this movie can be summed up in two words: BABY OIL. You'll know why when it appears on screen. (shudder) In the show's history this episode is especially notable for being Joel Hodgson's last as host. Previously [more inside]
posted by JHarris on Nov 7, 2019 - 16 comments

Mystery Science Theater 3000: MANOS: THE HANDS OF FATE  Rewatch   Season 4, Ep 24

Resuffer! For Halloween this year, we've moved an episode up an week. Spend All Hallow's Eve with us, Torgo and the gang! Previously. And we've got a whole bunch more Halloween stuff before and after at MST Club this week!
posted by JHarris on Oct 30, 2019 - 13 comments

Mystery Science Theater 3000: MASTER NINJA I  Rewatch   Season 3, Ep 22

Rewatch! Some doof is traveling across the country, in that way that loners in 70s shows often do, accompanied both by a hamster and a master ninja that is teaching him the ninja-ey arts along the way. The ninja, inexplicably, is played by Lee Van Cleef. The "movie" is actually two episodes of the show "The Master" strung together. The episode, of MST3K, is a good example of the kind of thing that made the show so popular. Previously.
posted by JHarris on Oct 3, 2019 - 3 comments

Mystery Science Theater 3000: GAMERA  Rewatch   Season 3, Ep 2

Rewatch! Up in the arctic, atomic tests run by Major Curley awaken a huge, slumbering giant from the deep... if you thought, "oh it's okay, it's just a big turtle," you might be surprised by the havoc it raises. Meanwhile, a sad sad kid in Japan is obsessed with his pet turtle, so his parents take it away from him, making him even more sad. Oh, how will their stories converge. First of the Gamera series. Other than perhaps Gamera vs. Barugon, the only Gamera without kids in it, this may be the one that plays it the straightest, without goofy enemy monsters, the Gamera theme song or other ridiculous elements. It's not terrible as a monster movie, but that subplot with Kenny pushes it over the edge into ludicrousness. Previously
posted by JHarris on Aug 14, 2019 - 1 comment

Mystery Science Theater 3000: POD PEOPLE  Rewatch   Season 3, Ep 3

Rewatch! Deep in the northwestern woods somewhere is a house in which lives a lonely boy with way too many pets. His newest pet, however, is from a species with serious aggression problems. Oh also there are poachers in the woods. Oh and there's some singers in town who are vacationing in those same woods. It stinks! Pod People, shown early in Season 3, is a hugely iconic episode of MST3K, and "It stinks!" quickly became one of the shows many, many catchphrases. And I think we can all agree: the pet alien from this movie would make a better president than our current one. Previously.
posted by JHarris on Aug 7, 2019 - 7 comments

Mystery Science Theater 3000: GAMERA VS. BARUGON  Rewatch   Season 3, Ep 4

Rewatch! Second of the Gamera kaiju films, in which a spinning, jet-propelled turtle fights monsters and destroys buildings. This one was of the age where Gamera was still mostly feared, and it's the only Gamera movie without any kids in it! The monster he fights, with freezing tongue and rainbow destruction beam, is rather random. Previously.
posted by JHarris on Jun 5, 2019 - 3 comments

Mystery Science Theater 3000: GAMERA VS. GAOS  Rewatch   Season 3, Ep 8

Rewatch! Another movie about Japan's fiery spinning menace who's also the friend to children. This is the third Gamera movie, and the third that MST has done. This is the one where Gamera makes the transition from menace to hero, to protect Japan from space vampire Gaos (or "Gyaos" depending on transliteration). Not nearly as weird as Gamera vs. Guiron, it still generally works as a monster movie, and may be the best of the Gamera films. Previously.
posted by JHarris on May 29, 2019 - 0 comments

Mystery Science Theater 3000: GAMERA VS. GUIRON  Rewatch   Season 3, Ep 12

Rewatch! It's the first of three Gamera movies in a row, out of MST's five. This is by far the silliest of the lot. Two kids are abducted by space ladies that want to eat their brains, but are rescued by Gamera after a fight with knife monster Guiron. There's so much in this episode: the Bike Song, "Cornjob," dancing go-go, giant turtle gymnastics, and, of course: The Gamera Song. He is filled with turtle meat! Previously.
posted by JHarris on May 23, 2019 - 6 comments

Mystery Science Theater 3000: THE BEATNIKS  Rewatch   Season 4, Ep 15

Rewatch! No, they're not Beatniks. They're not even Boatniks. A young thug is content with a life of robbery until it turns out he can sing, but his grasping for fortune and respectability is held back by his jilted criminal buddies. It was directed and written by voice actor Paul "Boris Badenov" Frees! There's also a General Hospital soap opera short, which are unfortunately among the most boring shorts MST did, but does have their commercial for The Booze Council.
posted by JHarris on May 16, 2019 - 4 comments

Mystery Science Theater 3000: STAR FORCE: FUGITIVE ALIEN II  Rewatch   Season 3, Ep 18

The crew of Earth spaceship Bacchus III deals with various problems, culminating with showdowns with Ken's old girlfriend out of a murder vendetta against him, and the kabuki leader of the Star Wolves himself. Two-fisted Japanese pseudo-Star Wars space adventures with surprisingly great music that was edited into near incomprehensibility by Sandy Frank Productions. It's the sequel to Fugitive Alien, which was slightly more lucid. Previously.
posted by JHarris on Feb 20, 2019 - 4 comments

Mystery Science Theater 3000: CATALINA CAPER  Rewatch   Season 2, Ep 4

Rewatch! What do you get when you cross a beach movie with a heist movie? Nothing good! It does contain a musical number by Little Richard. This movie marks the establishment of the rule that MST3K would avoid comedies, but it's still a fairly well-remembered episode from the show's classic era. With this film, we're back in Joel territory for a while! Previously
posted by JHarris on Feb 13, 2019 - 4 comments

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