All Elite Wrestling: Dynamite: Dynamite 9/13 and Rampage 9/15

September 13, 2023 4:58 PM - Season 4, Episode 50

Moxley returns to his hometown of Cincinnati to fight seven-odd foot of Bill! Also, stop me if you've heard this one before, it's a women's 4-way match! Don Callis reveals the next part of his eeeeevil portrait gallery, Le Sex Gods stop by to chat, and Page vs. Cage III.

This week's announced Dynamite card:

We’ll hear from Le Sex Gods (Sammy Guevara and Chris Jericho) before they face each other at Grand Slam next week

Don Callis reveals his next masterpiece painting

Women's 4-way match: Dr. Britt Baker, D.M.D. vs. Hikaru Shida vs. Nyla Rose vs. Toni Storm

The winner faces Saraya at Grand Slam, and Nyla is a nice addition to the usual faces seen here for the past few weeks. But seriously AEW, find a new stip for your women's division! At least Toni Storm's gradual transition to Norma Desmond is entertaining.

Hangman Adam Page vs. Brian Cage

Cage is one-third of the ROH Trios Champs, so a victory for Hangman would give some push to a storyline that he and the Elite could challenge down the road.

Grand Slam World Title Eliminator Tournament Final: Roderick Strong vs. Samoa Joe

As much as I would enjoy Joe tearing open Roddy's neck brace and feasting on his spine, the story is in seeing Strong face off with former pal Adam Cole down the road.

Jon Moxley (c) vs. Big Bill for the AEW International Championship

Bill is fundamentally unchanged from the days when he was "Big Cass" in the WWE, but Moxley is now the bloodthirsty death rider. He's likely to win, but with Ricky Starks currently holding Bill's leash, that new challenge looks likely too.

posted by The Pluto Gangsta (11 comments total)

I'd like to believe that every time a seven-footer enters the ring by stepping over the top rope, it's an homage to André. Moxley took about 5 minutes to get his crimson mask on, after which he got chokeslammed so hard I swear I saw some blood droplets splash upwards. Does he have a syrup tap installed on his face?

I find it a little bullshit that Bill couldn't lift Moxley to slam him while in the triangle choke, but sure, let's sell Mox as a submission specialist. Ricky makes the post-match castigo with a shoe!
posted by The Pluto Gangsta at 5:20 PM on September 13, 2023

Don Callis calling Takeshita "the Ace" gets me all goose-pimply imagining that Okada will show up at Wrestledream next month, but it looks like his new target is Kota Ibushi. He's gone into full-MRA lingo on the heel run, calling Kenny a "cuck" and Takeshita "the Alpha".

I think Takeshita had honestly never seen the painting and was avoiding looking at it so that he wouldn't corpse.
posted by The Pluto Gangsta at 5:31 PM on September 13, 2023

Toni Storm proves to be crazy like a fox, staying out of the ring long enough to let her opponents exhaust each other (even though I'm pretty sure Nyla got an actual visual pin before the interference). So she'll face Saraya in the final breakup of The Outcasts (at least in its current form). Also interesting is that things seem to have finally torn apart between Hikaru Shida and Britt Baker, meaning that one of them is probably headed for a heel turn.
posted by The Pluto Gangsta at 5:47 PM on September 13, 2023

The Jericho/Guevara video package reminded me that Sammy is the one who got "Judas" over as a crowdsong during the pandemic. Chris Jericho has always been his most deadly promo when he sounds sincere, even though he's coming off like proud papa here. The purpose is to launch Sammy as a single star, right? It can't be that we're putting over Jericho again, are you Tony?
posted by The Pluto Gangsta at 6:02 PM on September 13, 2023

I can't believe MJF ever made fun of Tony Khan for being a mark when he just re-delivered Scott Steiner's legendary math lesson to Samoa Joe. How many takes did that require? Shout out to Renee for not only keeping from laughing, but also mimicking the interviewer's puzzled look from the original.
posted by The Pluto Gangsta at 6:09 PM on September 13, 2023

The OPPOSITE of a shout out to whatever hyperactive squirrel in the production truck keeps cutting away from the in-ring action and caused the TV audience to miss key spots. The only justified time to cut away was when Swerve Strickland was giving his best glower at the top of the ring.
posted by The Pluto Gangsta at 6:20 PM on September 13, 2023

Wow, I was mistaken in my prediction on Joe vs. Roderick Strong. Joe is one of those guys that can get hit a thousand times, and then just catch someone in a ura nage to change the entire match.

What follows is meathead comedy gold, with Strong collapsing post-match at the mere sight of Adam Cole, which leads to Cole and The Kingdom shouting at each other over who cares about his dumb ass the most. I swear I heard Matt Taven shout out "I'm very concerned!" while Roddy is calling out "Adam! I can't see Adam!" Such glorious dopey melodrama until Joe makes it real again by choking out Cole while deadeyeing the camera.
posted by The Pluto Gangsta at 7:11 PM on September 13, 2023

Spoilers for Rampage herein, but the big story is Jade Cargill appears to be done with AEW and is likely heading to WWE.
posted by Etrigan at 9:07 AM on September 14, 2023

I heard the rumor but I don't want to believe it. She should arrive like a star wherever she ends up, but Vince and Hunter have a documented track record of only pushing talent that they brought up themselves, no one who got over from outside... if she debuts there I'll bet a dollar she's jobbing to Rhea Ripley and Zelina Vega in two months.
posted by The Pluto Gangsta at 7:58 PM on September 14, 2023

Rampage opens up with an 8-man tag: Lucha Bros & Hardys vs, Jeff Jarrett, Jay Lethal, Butcher and Blade, both teams arrive with such entourages you could have held a separate tag tournament. Count 'em: Alex Abrahantes, Brother Isaiah, Karen Jarrett, Satnam Singh, Sonjay Dutt, Kip Sabian, Penelope Ford, & The Bunny!
posted by The Pluto Gangsta at 7:20 PM on September 15, 2023

Dark Order comes out and tries to heel it up, insulting Cincinnati and demanding a trios title match while giving off angry toddler energy. I still don't know what the end goal of this is, are they free-floating heels now? Maybe bring Colt back as the token face?
posted by The Pluto Gangsta at 7:50 PM on September 15, 2023