Special Event: World Cup 2018 - Matchday 1
June 14, 2018 8:32 AM - Subscribe

The 2018 World Cup football tournament begins! Livewatching in here.
posted by LobsterMitten (859 comments total) 11 users marked this as a favorite
 
Russia scores in 12th minute, 1-0 here in minute 34
posted by the man of twists and turns at 8:37 AM on June 14, 2018


Not sure if that wasn't a foul, but the Saudi oversold any contact.

Boring game so far.
posted by lmfsilva at 8:43 AM on June 14, 2018


And now it’s 2-0! Root root root for the home team and all that.
posted by Kattullus at 8:44 AM on June 14, 2018


Awesome! I'm at work, but this at least allows me to follow along and pretend like I know something about soccer! I expect Russia will now park the bus, and limit Saudia Arabia to speculative efforts.
posted by nubs at 8:50 AM on June 14, 2018


The adjective I’m hearing the US Fox Sports announcers use most is “sloppy”. It’s not that Russia is playing well as much as they’re less bad.

One of the announcers is also repeatedly pronouncing Zhirkov as “jerkoff”. So take it as you will.
posted by ardgedee at 8:51 AM on June 14, 2018


A half hour left in the game. Nothing meaningful has happened since the last comment, even the goal attempts were steeped in ennui.
posted by ardgedee at 9:24 AM on June 14, 2018 [1 favorite]


KSA looked threatening for a bit but it does seem like they are about to concede a third
posted by Exceptional_Hubris at 9:29 AM on June 14, 2018 [1 favorite]


welp, that aged well
posted by Exceptional_Hubris at 9:32 AM on June 14, 2018 [2 favorites]


Saudi Arabia looking pretty raw on offensive transitions. Struggling to get into the last third and lacking any definition in plays.
posted by lmfsilva at 9:44 AM on June 14, 2018


From the Guardian liveblog:
82 min: It would be fair to say this match is over as a contest, in so far as it was ever a contest to begin with. If this Russia team are as bad as many people say they are, then Saudi Arabia must be truly atrocious. They can’t keep the ball, are completely toothless up front and have been unable to lay a glove on a Russian central defence with a combined age of over 70.
I've missed reading Barry Glendenning on a daily basis
posted by fifteen schnitzengruben is my limit at 9:52 AM on June 14, 2018 [4 favorites]


goal
posted by ardgedee at 9:53 AM on June 14, 2018




uno mas?
posted by Exceptional_Hubris at 9:54 AM on June 14, 2018


si.
posted by Exceptional_Hubris at 9:55 AM on June 14, 2018


5-0 now, Golovin on free kick.
posted by the man of twists and turns at 9:56 AM on June 14, 2018


The Saudi crown prince put on one hell of a forced smile at the end. I hope for the sake of the Saudi Arabian team that he doesn’t make his way to the dressing room.
posted by Kattullus at 10:02 AM on June 14, 2018


Wow, I'm glad I tuned in in time to see the last couple of goals (I was at the dentist). What fun! Now I'm kind of hoping Russia gets out of the group stage, though I realize that's pretty unlikely.
posted by languagehat at 10:04 AM on June 14, 2018 [1 favorite]


with a combined age of over 70.
I've missed reading Barry Glendenning on a daily basis


I first encountered him hearing him on the Guardian Football Weekly podcast, and I was surprised when I fianlly saw him and it turned out Barry Glendenning had a combined age under 70.
posted by Bulgaroktonos at 10:05 AM on June 14, 2018 [4 favorites]


I watched the match on the Telemundo stream, and the camera work was perfect. As I said over on the blue, this has me very interested in seeing Russia v Uruguay. That will be the real test of whether this was a Russian surge or just a KSA flop.
posted by 256 at 10:20 AM on June 14, 2018


Also interesting that 3 of the 5 goals (unless I'm mistaken) were scored by substitutes. I wonder if we'll see a different starting XI in Russia's next match.

My gamble on Smolov in the Fantasy League is not paying off as well as I would have expected from a 5-0 Russian win.
posted by 256 at 10:22 AM on June 14, 2018


Next up: Egypt vs. Uruguay, tomorrow.
posted by the man of twists and turns at 10:49 AM on June 14, 2018


> I watched the match on the Telemundo stream, and the camera work was perfect.

FIFA does all the camerawork and video production: Every broadcaster receives the same stream and provides their own announcing. As people stuck watching the US broadcasts of international sports events know, the difference in announcers still makes a significant qualitative change in experiencing the game.
posted by ardgedee at 10:54 AM on June 14, 2018 [1 favorite]


Huh. I didn't know that. Anyways, Telemundo is all I can get, and it's a fun way to practise my Spanish.

Oh, and languagehat: If the Russia we saw today keeps showing up, they'll have no problem getting out of the group stage. Even a draw against Egypt will probably get them through given today's goal differential.

The bigger problem is that, once they get out of group, they'll be facing Portugal or Spain in the Round of 16.
posted by 256 at 10:59 AM on June 14, 2018


> The bigger problem is that, once they get out of group, they'll be facing Portugal or Spain in the Round of 16.

Oh, yeah, only a fool would even think of their getting beyond the Round of 16. But even though I despise Putin and the entire system of government by oligarchy/police, I like Russia nd the Russians and, you know, root root root for the home team, and I'd like to see them get as far as possible. Which is the Round of 16.
posted by languagehat at 11:18 AM on June 14, 2018 [3 favorites]


Heja Sverige! Blågult!
posted by Chrysostom at 11:45 AM on June 14, 2018 [1 favorite]


I'm so BUMMED. I didn't RTFM on the whole how to watch it if you don't have cable TV and don't want to pay for it. We don't have an OTA antenna, the only VPN I have is through Opera, and I don't have a log in for any provider. I am a cheap bastard and it's come back to bite me in the arse. No futbol for me!
I know Germany isn't that well known, and kind of an underdog, but hopefully someone else out there besides me will root for their little team that could.
posted by Major Matt Mason Dixon at 11:56 AM on June 14, 2018


Germany is an underdog? [not sure if serious]
posted by clawsoon at 12:06 PM on June 14, 2018


Not even close to serious. THEY WILL CRUSH YOU ALL.
posted by Major Matt Mason Dixon at 12:30 PM on June 14, 2018 [2 favorites]


So where is the F-ing M on how to watch it if you don't have cable TV?
posted by Quasirandom at 1:15 PM on June 14, 2018




¡Gracias!
posted by Quasirandom at 1:47 PM on June 14, 2018


Saudi Arabia loves their World Cup drubbings. After a pretty great debut in 94, they were trashed once on every World Cup they qualified for since: 4 vs France (98), 8 vs Germany (2002), 4 vs Ukraine (2006), and now 5 vs Russia.

Literally, it was all downhill after this beauty.
posted by lmfsilva at 2:39 AM on June 15, 2018 [1 favorite]


If you live in the USA or can VPN to the USA, you don't need any log-in or anything to watch the stream on Telemundo.
posted by 256 at 4:06 AM on June 15, 2018 [2 favorites]


Watching some of the Egypt-Uruguay pre-game coverage.

I love the Egyptian fans' pharaoh headdresses.
posted by needled at 4:40 AM on June 15, 2018


Kickoff for Uruguay-Egypt.

Hopefully a less enervating match than yesterday’s RUS-KSA game.
posted by ardgedee at 5:03 AM on June 15, 2018


I’m for Egypt. Because Luis Suarez is an arse.
posted by prismatic7 at 5:07 AM on June 15, 2018 [1 favorite]


The stands seem barely half full and everybody’s firmly seated, huddling against the cold, but the crowd sounds more lively. I assume it’s a function of how the place is miked or else shenanigans.
posted by ardgedee at 5:11 AM on June 15, 2018


According to the commentary, they’ve added 12,000 seats at each end. Take a look at the images from goal. It’s mental up there...
posted by prismatic7 at 5:21 AM on June 15, 2018


Suarez bites off his first goal of the tournament. But it’s denied.
posted by ardgedee at 5:25 AM on June 15, 2018 [1 favorite]


Those extended ends here at Ekaterinburg are the freakiest shit I've seen on a stadium in a while. But the stadium is going to look lovely if they close them with the transparent wall.
posted by lmfsilva at 5:26 AM on June 15, 2018 [1 favorite]


It’s odd that everyone was herded into the giant stand while all these other on-camera seats are free. Presumably they were more expensive and the fans didn’t realize how far they’d be from the action when they bought tickets for the cheap seats.
posted by Kattullus at 5:29 AM on June 15, 2018


Looks like Uruguay have turned up now. Egypt want it a lot, but they aren’t coming together as well. Elneny and Trézéguet are having a good run but it’s not enough.
posted by prismatic7 at 5:30 AM on June 15, 2018


At the rate this game is going, Suarez's egregious miss is going to bite them on the ass.
posted by lmfsilva at 5:30 AM on June 15, 2018


Suarez gets a penalty kick but blows it. Please be generous to me and assume that’s some kind of very subtle riff on Suarez biting somebody.
posted by ardgedee at 5:35 AM on June 15, 2018


How long does Trézéguet have left on his contract in Turkey? He’s playing like a lad who wants out of the Süper Lig.
posted by prismatic7 at 5:36 AM on June 15, 2018


One of the things I’m unclear about: Is this in Ekaterinburg Stadium in Moscow (which I assume) or in Ekaterinburg City, somewhere in central Russia north of Kazakhstan.
posted by ardgedee at 5:38 AM on June 15, 2018


How long does Trézéguet have left on his contract in Turkey?
2020, says TransferMarkt
posted by lmfsilva at 5:40 AM on June 15, 2018 [1 favorite]


Amr Warda attempts a bicycle kick in midfield, biffs it and lands badly. After spending half a minute on the ground the ref helps him up and he continues playing, but he doesn’t look good. Poor guy.
posted by ardgedee at 5:42 AM on June 15, 2018


I have no idea about an Ekaterinburg Stadium in Moscow, but this in Ekaterinburg that's north of Kazakhstan as I understand it.
posted by Bulgaroktonos at 5:42 AM on June 15, 2018


It is in the city of Yekaterinburg, north of Kazakhstan. It’s the most eastern stadium of this World Cup. I’ll admit I'm a bit sad there are no games in Vladivostok (which I hear is a great city).
posted by Kattullus at 5:43 AM on June 15, 2018 [1 favorite]


That could make scheduling games interesting.
posted by ardgedee at 6:01 AM on June 15, 2018


It’s a magnificent-looking stadium, even with the alarming extensions at the ends...
posted by prismatic7 at 6:05 AM on June 15, 2018 [1 favorite]


Egypt-Uruguay is the kind of tight, intense contest dominated by two well-organized defenses we’ve gotten used to in international football during this century. After last night’s omniscorehambles I was kinda hoping there was a paradigm shift, but this match is the archetypal “game that needs a goal”.
posted by Kattullus at 6:20 AM on June 15, 2018


Agreed, and yet I’d still rather watch this game than yesterday’s.
posted by ardgedee at 6:22 AM on June 15, 2018 [1 favorite]


I feel the same, but I’ll probably remember two of the five goals from yesterday for a long time, and I’m already struggling to remember anything that happened in the first half of this match. That said, I’ve never been bored by it, and parts of yesterday’s game were quite boring.
posted by Kattullus at 6:26 AM on June 15, 2018


Is that the Egypt fans howling “BOOOOORRRRING!” whenever Uruguay have the ball? Best support of the competition so far, what with that and the excellent hats.
posted by prismatic7 at 6:26 AM on June 15, 2018 [2 favorites]


Ouch. If Egypt lose their keeper they have a big problem..
posted by prismatic7 at 6:33 AM on June 15, 2018


What can I say about that suit Uruguay that hasn't already been said about Afganistan? It looks bombed out and depleted.
posted by lmfsilva at 6:34 AM on June 15, 2018


> I’m already struggling to remember anything that happened in the first half of this match.

We’ll always have Suarez’ whiffs.
posted by ardgedee at 6:34 AM on June 15, 2018 [1 favorite]


WHAT A SAVE! He’s played a blinder today. Fair play to Egypt, they’ve done all they can.
posted by prismatic7 at 6:43 AM on June 15, 2018


Okay, I’ll remember Elshenawy’s save from Cavani’s shot. That was a hell of a reaction from the Egyptian goalkeeper.
posted by Kattullus at 6:44 AM on June 15, 2018


‘Suarez Whiffs’ is next year’s CR7 cologne...
posted by prismatic7 at 6:45 AM on June 15, 2018 [1 favorite]


Bloody hell.
posted by prismatic7 at 6:47 AM on June 15, 2018


Shiiiiit in basketball they’d call Gimenez’ header a buzzer beater.
posted by ardgedee at 6:49 AM on June 15, 2018


Oh poor Egypt! I thought that after Cavani’s free kick against the post that they might get away with a draw, but you can’t allow the Uruguayans an opportunity to load the penalty box with their tall defenders.
posted by Kattullus at 6:50 AM on June 15, 2018 [1 favorite]


Dammit, I was hoping Egypt could hold them. At least it wasn’t Suarez.
posted by languagehat at 6:50 AM on June 15, 2018


It was inevitable. Egypt wanted it so much but don’t have the power or the energy.
posted by prismatic7 at 6:51 AM on June 15, 2018


I don’t think you can call it inevitable when it didn’t happen until literally the last minute.
posted by languagehat at 6:53 AM on June 15, 2018


El-Shenawy (+ his left post) = best of the match.
posted by progosk at 6:53 AM on June 15, 2018 [1 favorite]


It was Suarez’ free kick that delivered the ball to Gimenez, so if soccer records assists, he gets that much.
posted by ardgedee at 6:53 AM on June 15, 2018


Sorry my bad, it was Sanchez, not Suarez. So yeah Suarez’ slate will probably be clean this game.
posted by ardgedee at 6:54 AM on June 15, 2018


Man, Egypt is not going quietly.
posted by languagehat at 6:54 AM on June 15, 2018


And Suarez does his “o no he kick me, look I am hurting!” business
posted by prismatic7 at 6:55 AM on June 15, 2018 [1 favorite]


Goal saves a terrible performance from Uruguay. If they want to win the group, they need to do a lot better against Russia on Game 3.
posted by lmfsilva at 6:59 AM on June 15, 2018


(Goalie El-Shenawy ≠ goalie El-Shenawy, btw.)
posted by progosk at 7:02 AM on June 15, 2018 [2 favorites]


Smooth play by Morocco.
posted by lmfsilva at 8:06 AM on June 15, 2018


Awwww yisss Morocco vs. Iran... it’s games like this, between two sets of players you’re only vaguely aware of, that bring wonder to the World Cup.
posted by Kattullus at 8:13 AM on June 15, 2018 [3 favorites]


Funny, I just told my wife "Literally nobody cares about this game except Moroccans and Iranians." Now I have to add "... and Kattullus."
posted by languagehat at 8:16 AM on June 15, 2018 [1 favorite]


what a mess...
posted by progosk at 8:21 AM on June 15, 2018


wow that was a lot of pinball
posted by Exceptional_Hubris at 8:21 AM on June 15, 2018


and that was something of a lost chance for Iran...
posted by progosk at 8:22 AM on June 15, 2018 [1 favorite]


more pinball
posted by progosk at 8:28 AM on June 15, 2018


Awwww yisss Morocco vs. Iran... it’s games like this, between two sets of players you’re only vaguely aware of, that bring wonder to the World Cup.

This comment reminds me of the The Other Final a documentary about a game staged in 2002 between the two bottom ranked teams in the world.
posted by nubs at 8:30 AM on June 15, 2018 [3 favorites]


whoop, I’m half an hour late to this match. First appearance by vuvuzelas, as far as I can tell.
posted by ardgedee at 8:31 AM on June 15, 2018


belated fall on what was a foul...
posted by progosk at 8:36 AM on June 15, 2018


Another flubbed chance for white; also, there've been at least three unforced lost passes by Iran, one even by the captain...
posted by progosk at 8:46 AM on June 15, 2018


What a chance for Iran! If Iran doesn’t win Azman will have a hell of a time falling asleep tonight.
posted by Kattullus at 8:47 AM on June 15, 2018


i overslept, did suarez bite anyone
posted by poffin boffin at 8:51 AM on June 15, 2018 [2 favorites]


Not today, poffin boffin, but it's a long tournament. He might wait for an elimination game before he really gets stuck in.
posted by nubs at 8:53 AM on June 15, 2018


You bite someone one time...

(Reminds me of this Slate story from the other day: "Turns out, as I’d thought, no one in the office cared that I bit the office manager. I spoke to one person in the office that I find professional and whose opinion I respect. He was confused that I was upset, felt that biting someone wasn’t that crazy for our office, and in the end he didn’t think it was a big deal.")
posted by clawsoon at 9:10 AM on June 15, 2018 [1 favorite]


You bite someone one time...

3 times... Suarez has bitten someone three times...
posted by Pendragon at 9:14 AM on June 15, 2018 [5 favorites]


You bite someone three times...
posted by clawsoon at 9:16 AM on June 15, 2018 [6 favorites]


So the game’s deadlocked because Morocco can dominate offense but can’t shoot for a damn, whereas Iraq’s can’t hang onto the ball for long enough to tell whether they can shoot at all.
posted by ardgedee at 9:20 AM on June 15, 2018 [2 favorites]


Pretty much sums it up as of 60-couple minutes in, yup.
posted by Quasirandom at 9:27 AM on June 15, 2018


Dang if the Iranians all have perfect haircuts.
posted by robocop is bleeding at 9:33 AM on June 15, 2018 [1 favorite]


Were they seen drinking pina coladas at Trader Vic’s?
posted by ardgedee at 9:40 AM on June 15, 2018 [1 favorite]


So many injuries.
posted by ardgedee at 9:44 AM on June 15, 2018


The coaches look to be a high end Jaime Lannister look alike versus a low end Nixon one.
posted by robocop is bleeding at 9:53 AM on June 15, 2018 [1 favorite]


Herve Renard's supermodel presence on the sidelines could very well have contributed to the stylishness of everyone's haircuts.
posted by poffin boffin at 9:54 AM on June 15, 2018 [1 favorite]


oh christ was that an own goal
posted by poffin boffin at 9:55 AM on June 15, 2018


There it goes. A long buildup but kind of underwhelming on release.
posted by ardgedee at 9:55 AM on June 15, 2018


A thunderous own goal.
posted by robocop is bleeding at 9:56 AM on June 15, 2018


Wow.
posted by languagehat at 9:57 AM on June 15, 2018


That was a great flying header. Too bad it went in the wrong goal. Oh well, now Morocco probably need to beat Portugal and Spain to get out of the group. It would be an amazing achievement if they pull it off.
posted by Kattullus at 9:57 AM on June 15, 2018


Own goal? That was not how I expected this to end.
posted by PearlRose at 9:58 AM on June 15, 2018


Okay, I'm way late, but as a Barcelona fan, it is my solemn duty to report that Suarez hasn't bitten anyone in 4 years. We believe that his close friendship with Messi has helped calm him down a lot. But, he's been shite on the pitch for a couple of months, so he needs to get his act together or Uruguay in in trouble.
posted by ceejaytee at 10:04 AM on June 15, 2018 [2 favorites]


Suarez hasn't bitten anyone in 4 years

High praise, indeed.
posted by Chrysostom at 10:32 AM on June 15, 2018 [8 favorites]


An entry from the Guardian liveblog for Spain-Portugal:
I know what you mean though - it’s a pretty old team, with nobody under the age of 26 in the starting XI. As ever with Spanish football, they could learn a lot from England.
As always with the English, I'm not sure if that last sentence is serious or a joke. Anyone care to enlighten me?
posted by clawsoon at 10:54 AM on June 15, 2018


Google tells me that Iran are the first team since 1966 to score a goal in a half during which they took no shots.

Anyone care to enlighten me?

Sometimes you learn what not to do.

NEXT UP: Portugal v Spain, a match which has been on every to-watch list I could find.
posted by the man of twists and turns at 10:57 AM on June 15, 2018 [1 favorite]


Suarez could live to be a hundred, never bite anyone again, and at least one obituary is going to say "Luis Suarez bites it."
posted by Bulgaroktonos at 10:58 AM on June 15, 2018 [6 favorites]


> As always with the English, I'm not sure if that last sentence is serious or a joke. Anyone care to enlighten me?

Nobody trash talks England’s team as well as the English.
posted by ardgedee at 11:02 AM on June 15, 2018 [1 favorite]


ARE YOU SERIOUSSSSS??????
posted by Exceptional_Hubris at 11:03 AM on June 15, 2018


Nice sell.
posted by ardgedee at 11:04 AM on June 15, 2018


And well parlayed.
posted by ardgedee at 11:04 AM on June 15, 2018


nice to see ronaldo celebrating pride month by getting under as many men as possible
posted by poffin boffin at 11:06 AM on June 15, 2018 [6 favorites]


Ronaldo with a PK scores, 1-0.
posted by the man of twists and turns at 11:06 AM on June 15, 2018


Ronaldo, it turns out, was named after Reagan. Not his fault, but doesn’t make me like him any the more.
posted by languagehat at 11:08 AM on June 15, 2018 [4 favorites]


I'm not naturally inclined to like Ronaldo, but my wife's mother is Portuguese, and I love the country, so I just try to embrace for him for the ridiculous person he is. That was a perfect start from that perspective.
posted by Bulgaroktonos at 11:16 AM on June 15, 2018 [1 favorite]


Guardian: "Ronaldo, incidentally, has now scored at four World Cups. He’ll make it five in 2022." Can't argue with that.
posted by languagehat at 11:16 AM on June 15, 2018


Ronaldo's cryogenically preserved body will also score in 2102. I have a suspicion that he's already being cryogenically preserved between games.
posted by clawsoon at 11:20 AM on June 15, 2018


Excellent, excellent solo goal by Diego Costa.
posted by ardgedee at 11:24 AM on June 15, 2018


That could have been a classic goal on break for Portugal, but despite his ridiculous speed, Ronaldo's first-touch pass was just a bit off.

And Spain come back with a real-men goal!
posted by progosk at 11:24 AM on June 15, 2018


What a great goal! No sympathy for Pepe after the number of people he's stomped on. What a save!
posted by ceejaytee at 11:27 AM on June 15, 2018


Holy shit that followup goal attempt, if not for the offside and the crossbar.
posted by ardgedee at 11:27 AM on June 15, 2018


holy shit
posted by languagehat at 11:45 AM on June 15, 2018


Ronaldo sinks a second with a long kick that’s half impressive and half remarkable luck.
posted by ardgedee at 11:45 AM on June 15, 2018


De Gea's hands had a blackout, he was on that ball...
posted by progosk at 11:46 AM on June 15, 2018


This game has been a barn burner.
posted by ardgedee at 11:47 AM on June 15, 2018


Just watching the highlights, this looks like a great game
posted by nubs at 11:48 AM on June 15, 2018


> half impressive and half remarkable luck

Way more than half luck. I have no idea how De Gea let that one by. But yeah, a real barn-burner.
posted by languagehat at 11:48 AM on June 15, 2018


I have no idea how De Gea let that one by

The Guardian is calling it "an unthinkable error"
posted by nubs at 11:52 AM on June 15, 2018


It's sort of the inverse of that terrible moment four years ago when Messi ran straight at the goal, undefended and unstoppable, and... missed. (A moment I'll never forget. Oh, Messi, Messi!)
posted by languagehat at 11:57 AM on June 15, 2018


Oh man, I sit happily through two tense one nil games, but can’t watch the first half of Portugal-Spain. And I miss an absolute belter. I sat down to watch just before Ronaldo’s second, but I was scrolling through the Guardian liveblog to see what I had missed only to not see the goal. I’ll keep my eyes glued to the action for the second half.
posted by Kattullus at 11:59 AM on June 15, 2018


that was an extremely stressful 45 minutes
posted by poffin boffin at 12:00 PM on June 15, 2018 [1 favorite]


Just got to see the highlight of Renaldo's second (i'm at work, and unable to stream anything, so I'm waiting for the local channel that is providing coverage to upload highlight clips) and...yeah. Wow. What a botched play.
posted by nubs at 12:02 PM on June 15, 2018


Costa evens it!
posted by languagehat at 12:12 PM on June 15, 2018 [1 favorite]


What a game!!
posted by languagehat at 12:12 PM on June 15, 2018


nice set piece.
posted by progosk at 12:12 PM on June 15, 2018


A second for Diego Costa, this time in the middle of a trafffic jam full of defenders and teammates.
posted by ardgedee at 12:13 PM on June 15, 2018


Great headed pass from Busquets.
posted by ceejaytee at 12:14 PM on June 15, 2018


Another!!!
posted by languagehat at 12:15 PM on June 15, 2018


I have plenty irrational dislikes when it comes to football players, Jordi Alba is one such case, but my dislike of Diego Costa is perfectly rational. Hell of a footballer though. But I still hope his bedsheets are forever itchy.
posted by Kattullus at 12:15 PM on June 15, 2018 [2 favorites]


OMG. Round of applause.
posted by macapes at 12:15 PM on June 15, 2018


what a goal, what a game
posted by Exceptional_Hubris at 12:16 PM on June 15, 2018


What a beautiful goal from Nacho!
posted by languagehat at 12:16 PM on June 15, 2018


Nacho chips a crisp shot and doesn’t cheese it. What a cracking play!
posted by ardgedee at 12:16 PM on June 15, 2018 [2 favorites]


Holy cow!
posted by ceejaytee at 12:16 PM on June 15, 2018


that strike was perfection - there isn't a keeper alive who could have gotten there. incredible.
posted by Exceptional_Hubris at 12:16 PM on June 15, 2018


ronaldo tantrum, everyone do a shot
posted by poffin boffin at 12:17 PM on June 15, 2018 [4 favorites]


España! Wow - what a goal!
posted by the quidnunc kid at 12:17 PM on June 15, 2018


Isco doggedly, and then Nacho with a magic boot!
posted by progosk at 12:17 PM on June 15, 2018


Fantastic game!
posted by ersatz at 12:18 PM on June 15, 2018


Wow, this game! I can't keep up
posted by nubs at 12:18 PM on June 15, 2018


Does the ref have TWO pocket protectors? What the hell is he protecting! :-)
posted by the quidnunc kid at 12:20 PM on June 15, 2018


his pockets
posted by macapes at 12:23 PM on June 15, 2018 [8 favorites]


bah! C’mon you Portugals!
posted by the quidnunc kid at 12:24 PM on June 15, 2018 [1 favorite]


The font FOX is using for the team/players name is bordering on Papyrus levels of goofy.
posted by robocop is bleeding at 12:26 PM on June 15, 2018 [1 favorite]


Exceptional_Hubris: "that strike was perfection - there isn't a keeper alive who could have gotten there. incredible."

The dead ones would probably have done even worse.
posted by Chrysostom at 12:26 PM on June 15, 2018 [2 favorites]


Oooh! I was sure that was gonna end in a goal ...
posted by the quidnunc kid at 12:28 PM on June 15, 2018


I can’t take my eyes off the screen for a second!
posted by languagehat at 12:28 PM on June 15, 2018 [1 favorite]


Quite like the deep green hue of the Portuguese socks, too. Whadda Spain got - white? Honestly! The game is called “socker”, I think the team with the best hosiery should win.
posted by the quidnunc kid at 12:30 PM on June 15, 2018 [1 favorite]


I'm supposed to be working . . .
posted by ceejaytee at 12:31 PM on June 15, 2018


nice tackle, that!
posted by the quidnunc kid at 12:32 PM on June 15, 2018


The font FOX is using
That's likely Dusha, FIFA's attempt at a homage to cyrillic aesthetics...
posted by progosk at 12:34 PM on June 15, 2018 [1 favorite]


I'm supposed to be working . . .

So am I pal, so I am.

My Russian co-worker saw that I was checking the Guardian live blog and excitedly asked me what team I was rooting for. I had to sheepishly admit that I was mostly there for the spectacle of it all (and possibly some biting). He visibly deflated.
posted by PearlRose at 12:34 PM on June 15, 2018 [1 favorite]


add me to team hates-the-font
posted by Exceptional_Hubris at 12:35 PM on June 15, 2018


My spouse is in Madrid and is texting me how the game is going based solely on how loud the rumbling from the street is. Five stories below. On the other side of the building. While listening to other stuff on headphones.
posted by Etrigan at 12:35 PM on June 15, 2018 [4 favorites]


This game is why it will be extremely difficult to boycott the WC in 2022. What a match!
posted by Tevin at 12:38 PM on June 15, 2018 [2 favorites]


I can’t take my eyes off the screen for a second!

i tried to eat a taco and it ended really badly
posted by poffin boffin at 12:40 PM on June 15, 2018 [4 favorites]


The Guardian liveblog is stating that Spain have it in control. So now I'm expecting some last minute wild outcome, just because that's how I roll with tournaments where I don't care who wins. Chaos over all!
posted by nubs at 12:41 PM on June 15, 2018 [3 favorites]


Ronaldo’s gotten testy.
posted by ardgedee at 12:42 PM on June 15, 2018


Box to box stuff, yah? Peeps I just had to leave the pub, get on a train ... can you just yell out a play-by-play from your work-desk/overseas location/comfort of your own home (as applicable)? The WiFi on this tank engine is pretty dodgy, tbh ...
posted by the quidnunc kid at 12:42 PM on June 15, 2018 [1 favorite]


Ah, my La Liga rivalry at work.
posted by ceejaytee at 12:42 PM on June 15, 2018


The Greek TV web signal died, so we're watching the rest at Telecinco. The sportscaster is rather funny.
posted by ersatz at 12:42 PM on June 15, 2018


Uh-oh, free kick for Portugal...
posted by languagehat at 12:44 PM on June 15, 2018


87th minute free kick for Ronaldo totally within his range . . .
posted by Exceptional_Hubris at 12:44 PM on June 15, 2018


Noice.
posted by macapes at 12:45 PM on June 15, 2018


Ronaldo ties it!!
posted by languagehat at 12:45 PM on June 15, 2018 [1 favorite]


hissss
posted by poffin boffin at 12:45 PM on June 15, 2018


C'mon Pique. That was dumb.
posted by ceejaytee at 12:45 PM on June 15, 2018


this game yall
posted by Exceptional_Hubris at 12:45 PM on June 15, 2018 [1 favorite]


ugh, just too perfect, that curl.
posted by progosk at 12:45 PM on June 15, 2018 [1 favorite]


Hat trick for Ronaldo! That was a very stupid foul by Pique.
posted by ardgedee at 12:45 PM on June 15, 2018


Can't stand Cristiano but damn!
posted by ersatz at 12:45 PM on June 15, 2018 [2 favorites]


Hah! I laughed out loud from the sheer wonderful ridiculousness of Ronaldo scoring a hat trick against Spain at the World Cup. What an absurd statistical outlier of a player.
posted by Kattullus at 12:46 PM on June 15, 2018 [5 favorites]


Spain has control of nothing, Guardian liveblog! Ha!

Now, somebody needs to score in like the 93rd minute to win the game. For somebody.
posted by nubs at 12:46 PM on June 15, 2018 [1 favorite]


RONNIE!!!
posted by the quidnunc kid at 12:47 PM on June 15, 2018


It’s his dream to win a game all by himself. He’d like to wave his teammates off the field like Satchel Paige.
posted by languagehat at 12:48 PM on June 15, 2018


oh god, those ronadlo face masks are a hard no from me. horrifying.
posted by Exceptional_Hubris at 12:48 PM on June 15, 2018 [2 favorites]


i think they modeled them from The Statue
posted by poffin boffin at 12:50 PM on June 15, 2018 [3 favorites]


Can we just call this the final and get extra time now?
posted by macapes at 12:53 PM on June 15, 2018 [1 favorite]


stream just cut out here, before the end...
posted by progosk at 12:53 PM on June 15, 2018


I’d be happy to watch these two teams play all the rest of the games.
posted by languagehat at 12:54 PM on June 15, 2018 [6 favorites]


stream just cut out here, before the end...

Same here. What the fuck?
posted by Bulgaroktonos at 12:54 PM on June 15, 2018 [1 favorite]


The Guardian liveblog gives us a reality check: It’s important not to get carried away with how good that match was. It was only one of the greatest group matches in World Cup history.
posted by nubs at 12:54 PM on June 15, 2018 [3 favorites]


The FOX commentators agree.
posted by ceejaytee at 12:55 PM on June 15, 2018


how could you not agree? it was as drama-filled and high quality as you could possibly hope for in a non-elimination setting.
posted by Exceptional_Hubris at 12:56 PM on June 15, 2018


stream just cut out here, before the end...

Same here. What the fuck?


Turns out Mediaset's embedded streaming player has a time-line function; clicking back to "live" put me back into game.
posted by progosk at 12:57 PM on June 15, 2018


Ok, so: all square, but obviously the real winner here was the team with the more colourful socks. In that context, I look forward to seeing some interesting developments in sock-colour strategy before we reach the knockout rounds. I’m sure the various team managers are already knitting some new ideas to get a leap on their competitors! Socker, eh? Bloody hell!
posted by the quidnunc kid at 1:01 PM on June 15, 2018


I’ve had a sneaking feeling that one of those teams will be eliminated in the group stage. But if either team plays at anything approaching the level they performed at today, then probably they’ll get through the group with ease.
posted by Kattullus at 1:09 PM on June 15, 2018 [1 favorite]


i am not looking forward to getting up at 8am tomorrow
posted by poffin boffin at 1:11 PM on June 15, 2018


Poffin, tomorrows early game actually starts at 6am Eastern. Thankfully its the only match of the tournament scheduled for that unfortunate hour.
posted by Exceptional_Hubris at 1:16 PM on June 15, 2018


yeah i don't get out of bed for france
posted by poffin boffin at 1:20 PM on June 15, 2018 [3 favorites]


that was a hell of a day and I have to admit that it's pretty delightful to see Iran top the rankings in group B after all that madness; this is why I love the world cup
posted by karayel at 1:25 PM on June 15, 2018 [3 favorites]


Goddamnit, the first good game, and I spent most of it in a meeting. Who would expect a person to work at a time like this? The search for civilization continues...
posted by kleinsteradikaleminderheit at 1:27 PM on June 15, 2018


That was as good as football gets. Spain were absolutely throttling Portugal and then... surprise! Deeply satisfying: and I kind of hate both teams! If just one more game is as exciting and interesting this will have been a really good World Cup.

(And though you can kind of explain away Porto‘s goals, drawing the foul, goalie error - they still sunk the free kick (the last once rather elegantly too, alas). I am really really looking forward to Spain‘s next matches, Porto‘s not as much. As a team Spain were frighteningly commanding.
I think this is all going to be really alright.
And tomorrow is Iceland vs Argentina - the greatest player of all time against the greatest fans!)
posted by From Bklyn at 1:27 PM on June 15, 2018 [3 favorites]


Who would expect a person to work at a time like this? The search for civilization continues.

Here's the question: If we had Fully Automated Luxury Gay Space Communism, we wouldn't have to work and could watch the World Cup; but if we had Fully Automated Luxury Gay Space Communism, would we still have the World Cup to watch?
posted by nubs at 1:29 PM on June 15, 2018


If we had Fully Automated Luxury Gay Space Communism, would we still have the World Cup to watch?

That's an easy one, of course we would! And for free, without any ads too.
posted by One Second Before Awakening at 1:33 PM on June 15, 2018 [1 favorite]


Most of the players at the tournament have all of their physical needs met. They want for nothing. You could argue that they are already living in a tiny slice of fully automated etc.
posted by clawsoon at 1:35 PM on June 15, 2018 [1 favorite]


On the Jon Bois post about Rickey Henderson they made the point that he was so good at stealing bases that even though everyone knew he was going to steal the base and he was still able to do it with amazing efficiency. This is just like Ronaldo. Everyone knows what he's going to do and yet he's still able to do it.
posted by any portmanteau in a storm at 1:57 PM on June 15, 2018 [3 favorites]


Yup, true on both counts.
posted by languagehat at 2:03 PM on June 15, 2018


poffin boffin: "yeah i don't get out of bed for france"

You are Marie Antoinette, and I claim my five pounds.
posted by Chrysostom at 2:07 PM on June 15, 2018 [1 favorite]


Thank you for reminding me to postmates some cake!
posted by poffin boffin at 2:13 PM on June 15, 2018 [1 favorite]


Who will bet me a sonnet, re: Australia v France? I say Australia shall triumph, and whomsoever wouldst wager against me can claim 14 lines of rhyme, in France’s glory, should they not. But if they do: you pay out a sonnet for Oz! Come on, dear comrades - poesy is the quintessence of world-cuppiness, as well you know. So bet me! Allez allez allez! Oi oi oi!
posted by the quidnunc kid at 2:20 PM on June 15, 2018 [2 favorites]


Quelle folie est ça? Tu veux fair un petit jeux? Donc, allons, jouer! Les bleus vont pas seulment gagné, ils gagneront au moins 3 null.
Et puis tu recevra un sonnet comme soulagement.

La dernier point c’est de décider quel sort de sonnet? Alexandrine? Ou quoi? Et dans la belle langue de Vérlaine? Ou celle de l’autre côté de la manche?
posted by From Bklyn at 2:41 PM on June 15, 2018 [2 favorites]


No, the loser (of the bet) writes a sonnet for the winner. Style as per your (or, more likely, my) preference.
posted by the quidnunc kid at 2:55 PM on June 15, 2018


If we had Fully Automated Luxury Gay Space Communism...

..the butlers would be cloned from Ronaldo
posted by chavenet at 3:12 PM on June 15, 2018 [1 favorite]


Right then. Come on Aussie, etc.

We’re so fucked
posted by prismatic7 at 3:03 AM on June 16, 2018


Half an hour in and Australia hasn't been slaughtered yet. Yet.
posted by the duck by the oboe at 3:31 AM on June 16, 2018


Australia are playing a totally commendable defensive game. I thought this was gonna be a totally uneven game. Maybe France will remember about that whole ‘ball goes in net’ business ...
posted by From Bklyn at 3:46 AM on June 16, 2018 [1 favorite]


Penalty review! That is so damn exciting! What strange wonder is this!
posted by From Bklyn at 4:13 AM on June 16, 2018 [1 favorite]


Bugger.
posted by the duck by the oboe at 4:16 AM on June 16, 2018


HOLY FUKK
posted by the duck by the oboe at 4:19 AM on June 16, 2018


Main !
posted by motdiem2 at 4:19 AM on June 16, 2018


They remembered! :-) (Starts drafting sonnet ...)
posted by the quidnunc kid at 4:19 AM on June 16, 2018


France attempts to play volleyball, Australia is rewarded.
posted by robocop is bleeding at 4:20 AM on June 16, 2018


Oh hang on, they reminded Oz too. Sorry, I’m a little behind obviously!
posted by the quidnunc kid at 4:21 AM on June 16, 2018


But wait!

Well there you go. I really hoped there would be a better game than this. I’m impressed at how well Australia is playing and how poorly France are playing. (Australia does have two players who play in the Bundesleague - it’s notable in their style as well).
posted by From Bklyn at 4:21 AM on June 16, 2018 [1 favorite]


*sharpens pencil, in case*
posted by From Bklyn at 4:22 AM on June 16, 2018 [1 favorite]


France is playing poorly - very uncoordinated, and they look afraid
posted by motdiem2 at 4:24 AM on June 16, 2018


Furious takes the field with elaborate headdress in an attempt to distract the Aussie’s.
posted by From Bklyn at 4:27 AM on June 16, 2018


GAAH
posted by the duck by the oboe at 4:38 AM on June 16, 2018


Good effort Aussies.
posted by jjderooy at 5:09 AM on June 16, 2018


Australia not completely embarrassed but France pretty ordinary.
posted by hawthorne at 5:11 AM on June 16, 2018


Going back to bed as I was apparently just smart enough to wake up in between the two matches, and not when anybody is, you know, playing.
posted by nubs at 5:16 AM on June 16, 2018 [2 favorites]


Bugger
posted by unliteral at 5:19 AM on June 16, 2018


Kattullus: Is that you quoted on the Guardian worldcup blog?
posted by dhruva at 5:37 AM on June 16, 2018 [1 favorite]


Just been driving ... what was the score?
posted by the quidnunc kid at 5:38 AM on June 16, 2018


I'm really looking forward to the Argentina-Iceland game. I just want to see Iceland come out and demand some respect on the world stage. It would obviously be incredible if they won or drew, but I'm not holding my breath. I just want to see them play world class soccer against one of the best teams there is, and maybe even score a goal.
posted by 256 at 5:39 AM on June 16, 2018 [2 favorites]


France 2 Australia 1.
posted by hawthorne at 5:42 AM on June 16, 2018 [2 favorites]


France looking ordinary is more or less an upgrade over what they usually are, which is a rioting mob. There's a reason why one of the podcasts I started listening described the whole Lopetegui saga as "Spain doing a France".

One thing that crossed my mind as the Pogba goal was analyzed by the GLT is that it could be used for some additional metrics, such as the distance from the goalposts for every shot just close or right in next to them. It seems a waste to have such an accurate system that will likely be used maybe a couple more times this World Cup at best, and not use it for TV broadcast extras.
posted by lmfsilva at 5:42 AM on June 16, 2018 [2 favorites]


the quidnunc kid: Just been driving ... what was the score?

Fra-Aus: 2:1 : highlights were a VAR assisted penalty for france, a really stupid umtiti induced penalty for aus, and a goal line tech toe-poke by pogba for france (I'm kind of losing adjective order sense now)
posted by dhruva at 5:45 AM on June 16, 2018 [2 favorites]


Fair victory, oh France! It does not gall
To praise thy Gaulish triumph, o’er Oz!
From head to foot, you dauphins of the ball,
Were worthy victors, lords of all that was
In play, when you played out this groupish game.
While humble socceroos could only grope
At chances hardly-realised; yet, no blame
Should live within their hearts, but only hope:

Hope that France shall win this Gang of Four,
And then go all the way to win the cup!
Then our socceroos will know the score:
The winner’s rise lifts even losers up!
To play world-champions would be no loss, but gain -
So thusly, France, take pity on our pain!
posted by the quidnunc kid at 5:45 AM on June 16, 2018 [5 favorites]


heh. you didn't watch the match, did you :)
posted by dhruva at 5:47 AM on June 16, 2018 [1 favorite]


No, I was on the road (although I saw five minutes at lunchtime, around 63:00 game-time?). But you were never going to get an accurate game summary outta me (even if I had watched it)!
posted by the quidnunc kid at 5:55 AM on June 16, 2018 [1 favorite]


Finally not asleep or at work for a match! C'mon Iceland!
posted by the primroses were over at 6:00 AM on June 16, 2018 [2 favorites]


Dale Argentina!
posted by languagehat at 6:02 AM on June 16, 2018 [1 favorite]


Dale Argentina owes me five bucks. Dale, if you’re reading this, pay up.
posted by ardgedee at 6:05 AM on June 16, 2018 [1 favorite]


DON’T YOU HURT MESSI!!
posted by languagehat at 6:08 AM on June 16, 2018 [1 favorite]


wow iceland is really bringing it
posted by dhruva at 6:10 AM on June 16, 2018 [1 favorite]


Jesus, that was scary.
posted by languagehat at 6:10 AM on June 16, 2018 [1 favorite]


Feel like now Argentina woke up a bit
posted by dhruva at 6:12 AM on June 16, 2018


Bjornason... oh this does look promising
posted by From Bklyn at 6:12 AM on June 16, 2018


Argentina is looking better now.
posted by languagehat at 6:18 AM on June 16, 2018


goooooooooollllll
posted by dhruva at 6:19 AM on June 16, 2018


GOOOOOOL!!!
posted by languagehat at 6:20 AM on June 16, 2018


Argentina up 1, Sergio Aguero
posted by the man of twists and turns at 6:20 AM on June 16, 2018


or, as the mexican commentators here put it, GOLAZO!
posted by dhruva at 6:20 AM on June 16, 2018


The American commenters on Fox Sports cheerily remark that the Icelandic team are so close that the two strikers even recently went on a trip together to Thailand.

This might be the first time that news of footballers going on bachelor vacations to Thailand has been used as an anecdote to emphasize their wholesome character.
posted by ardgedee at 6:23 AM on June 16, 2018 [4 favorites]


THUNDERCLAP
posted by robocop is bleeding at 6:23 AM on June 16, 2018


Holy shit, now we have a game, what a great equaliser
posted by dhruva at 6:23 AM on June 16, 2018 [1 favorite]


WTF!!!!
posted by languagehat at 6:24 AM on June 16, 2018


Finnbogason at close range in a second attempt,
GOAL, 1-1
posted by the man of twists and turns at 6:24 AM on June 16, 2018 [1 favorite]


Iceland answers! This is a fun game. Aguero's footwork on that first goal was fabulous.
posted by the primroses were over at 6:25 AM on June 16, 2018 [1 favorite]


Daaaaamn, our stream is only a minute lagged and the whole internet is spoiling the game for me.
posted by ardgedee at 6:25 AM on June 16, 2018


HISTORY!
posted by From Bklyn at 6:26 AM on June 16, 2018


I don’t mind fun as long as it comes out OK.
posted by languagehat at 6:26 AM on June 16, 2018 [1 favorite]


When my non-sports-watching spouse said they would join me in watching the Spain-Iceland match, I went out of my way to warn them that it probably wouldn't be very interesting. Shows what I know.

It would blow the hell out of my bracket, but I sort of want to see Iceland pull this out now.
posted by firechicago at 6:28 AM on June 16, 2018 [1 favorite]


Spain-Iceland? That doesn’t seem plausible in this tournament.
posted by ardgedee at 6:30 AM on June 16, 2018


Can the ref card himself?
posted by robocop is bleeding at 6:32 AM on June 16, 2018


That will surely go in the blooper reel
posted by dhruva at 6:33 AM on June 16, 2018


I think they meant Arg-Ice.
posted by languagehat at 6:34 AM on June 16, 2018


Iceland with all the possession
posted by nubs at 6:39 AM on June 16, 2018


I think they meant Arg-Ice.

And this is why I shouldn't try to do anything else while watching footie.
posted by firechicago at 6:41 AM on June 16, 2018


I am not at all happy with Caballero.
posted by languagehat at 6:53 AM on June 16, 2018


Well, our AppleTV certainly chose an opportune moment to decide there’s no such thing as the internet.
posted by ardgedee at 7:03 AM on June 16, 2018


To be fair, there is actually no such thing as the internet.
posted by languagehat at 7:05 AM on June 16, 2018 [1 favorite]


Argie defense don't seem to have their act together...
posted by progosk at 7:09 AM on June 16, 2018


Yeah, that’s their traditional problem and it hasn’t gone away.
posted by languagehat at 7:11 AM on June 16, 2018


Lol, Mascherano completed more passes in the 1st half than Iceland did as a team? Iceland really makes the most out of their time of possession.
posted by the primroses were over at 7:11 AM on June 16, 2018 [1 favorite]


Lol but seriously Arg you have to take control of this game.
posted by languagehat at 7:13 AM on June 16, 2018


has that catapult throw-in thing ever actually worked for Iceland?
posted by progosk at 7:14 AM on June 16, 2018


Is Iceland's whole strategy to let the other team have the ball and tire themselves out? Is this like rope-a-dope soccer?
posted by nubs at 7:15 AM on June 16, 2018


i overslept again and i have regrets
posted by poffin boffin at 7:18 AM on June 16, 2018 [1 favorite]


Any Argentine offensive is finding an instant three-man ice-wall pop up around them..
posted by progosk at 7:20 AM on June 16, 2018


Penalty!!
posted by languagehat at 7:22 AM on June 16, 2018


(when it's not a fouling ice-shin...)
posted by progosk at 7:22 AM on June 16, 2018


Denied!
posted by nubs at 7:22 AM on June 16, 2018 [1 favorite]


I hope all these extremely pale gentlemen from Iceland are wearing the appropriate amount of sunblock.
posted by poffin boffin at 7:22 AM on June 16, 2018 [1 favorite]


NOOOO!!!!
posted by languagehat at 7:23 AM on June 16, 2018


*holds breath*

Phew, save!
posted by the primroses were over at 7:23 AM on June 16, 2018 [1 favorite]


ICED!!!
posted by progosk at 7:23 AM on June 16, 2018


I don't think the Icelandic goalie will ever need to buy his own beer ever again. What a save!
posted by fifteen schnitzengruben is my limit at 7:24 AM on June 16, 2018 [2 favorites]


Son of a bitch! I know it’s unfair but I can’t help calling Messi a choker in my head.
posted by languagehat at 7:25 AM on June 16, 2018


Aww, man, can't keep giving Messi chances ...
posted by the primroses were over at 7:25 AM on June 16, 2018


poffin boffin: I hope all these extremely pale gentlemen from Iceland are wearing the appropriate amount of sunblock.

They are soaking up the Vitamin D during these few bright summer hours so that they do not get rickets. That is how they have grown up so big and strong.
posted by clawsoon at 7:25 AM on June 16, 2018 [6 favorites]


Ronaldo would have made that free kick that Messi missed.
posted by ardgedee at 7:27 AM on June 16, 2018


i know and it is the cruel eagle tearing at the liver of my soul
posted by poffin boffin at 7:28 AM on June 16, 2018 [3 favorites]


Does anyone know what the Argentine fans were just chanting there?
posted by firechicago at 7:29 AM on June 16, 2018


In case American viewers are wondering why Iceland’s abbreviation is ISL in the scoreboard: Fox Sports is using ISO 3166-1 alpha-3
posted by ardgedee at 7:33 AM on June 16, 2018 [1 favorite]


Can we nominate the Iceland team as “Most Vikingish of World Cup 2018”?
posted by ardgedee at 7:35 AM on June 16, 2018


Argh...
posted by languagehat at 7:37 AM on June 16, 2018


Yes, Argh-Isl is the match
posted by nubs at 7:38 AM on June 16, 2018


not Messi's day...
posted by progosk at 7:40 AM on June 16, 2018


Dammit Messi!!
posted by languagehat at 7:40 AM on June 16, 2018


MESSI PLS i woke up early, i beg you.
posted by poffin boffin at 7:41 AM on June 16, 2018


Now he’s blocked by his own teammate!
posted by languagehat at 7:43 AM on June 16, 2018


Messi's shot getting blocked by agüero? is adding insult to injury
posted by dhruva at 7:45 AM on June 16, 2018


Another great save!
posted by languagehat at 7:46 AM on June 16, 2018 [1 favorite]


SEVENTH SAVE
posted by poffin boffin at 7:46 AM on June 16, 2018 [1 favorite]


five more minutes...
posted by progosk at 7:49 AM on June 16, 2018


5 minutes of added time
posted by nubs at 7:50 AM on June 16, 2018


All that footwork for a wasted shot. It’s almost like people were expecting something out of Messi that he wasn’t capable of delivering.
posted by ardgedee at 7:52 AM on June 16, 2018


classy, classy defense
posted by progosk at 7:53 AM on June 16, 2018


He's totally capable of delivering.
posted by dhruva at 7:53 AM on June 16, 2018


i am in pain
posted by poffin boffin at 7:54 AM on June 16, 2018


Halldórsson!!!

I want Argentina to use this frustration to tear it up from here on out, but I am so happy for Iceland. Hell of a draw!
posted by the primroses were over at 7:54 AM on June 16, 2018 [3 favorites]


Ice is fierce!
posted by progosk at 7:54 AM on June 16, 2018


From the Fox announcer: "Iceland beats Argentina 1-1"

ummm... I see what you were going for but ...
posted by firechicago at 7:55 AM on June 16, 2018 [1 favorite]


Fucking hell.
posted by languagehat at 7:55 AM on June 16, 2018


That would require proof, wouldn’t it.
posted by ardgedee at 7:55 AM on June 16, 2018


well, there's that then.
posted by dhruva at 7:55 AM on June 16, 2018


Fox is showing a field full of people in Iceland. Wondering if our Kattullus is there.
posted by ardgedee at 7:56 AM on June 16, 2018 [1 favorite]


Iceland get a draw! I have to say, beyond cheering for ISL because they are the underdog, Maradonna's comments yesterday about the joint NA hosting of 2026 have me sour on Argentina.
posted by nubs at 7:57 AM on June 16, 2018


That was a fine fine match
posted by From Bklyn at 7:57 AM on June 16, 2018 [1 favorite]


wow.
posted by 256 at 8:00 AM on June 16, 2018


Are there any estimates on how many Icelandic nationals have traveled abroad for the cup because I'm really overcome by the extreme adorableness of the idea that it might be like 1/3 of the entire population.
posted by poffin boffin at 8:03 AM on June 16, 2018 [3 favorites]


> Maradonna's comments yesterday

It wasn't Maradona, it was the Mouth of God.
posted by ardgedee at 8:04 AM on June 16, 2018 [1 favorite]


I'm really overcome by the extreme adorableness of the idea that it might be like 1/3 of the entire population.
But that would be fair enough really.
posted by hawthorne at 8:05 AM on June 16, 2018


1/5th, it seems!
posted by progosk at 8:07 AM on June 16, 2018 [2 favorites]


And: this game was actually sold out before the tickets went on open sale. The stadium holds 43.000...
posted by progosk at 8:09 AM on June 16, 2018


I am annoyed that the FIFA graphics departments couldn’t be bothered to produce a typeface with an Ð in it.
posted by Bloxworth Snout at 8:09 AM on June 16, 2018 [1 favorite]


> Maradonna's comments yesterday about the joint NA hosting of 2026 have me sour on Argentina.

For god's sake, don't pay attention to anything Maradona says. He represents nobody but himself, if that.
posted by languagehat at 8:10 AM on June 16, 2018 [2 favorites]


Start Icardi, you fucks.

Oh, right.
posted by lmfsilva at 8:11 AM on June 16, 2018


I am annoyed that the FIFA graphics departments couldn’t be bothered to produce a typeface with an Ð in it.

It was designed in 2014, so it was just too much of a longshot they'd need it, back then. Meantime, someone has homebrewed an arabic version of Dusha, though; I'm sure some type-nerd in Reykjavik is on it right now...
posted by progosk at 8:19 AM on June 16, 2018


Anyway time to very quickly read the wiki article on the Peruvian mnt so I can pretend I knew all along and not disgrace my people
posted by poffin boffin at 8:21 AM on June 16, 2018 [3 favorites]


We’re entering our third hour of Scandinavians competing with South Americans. They must have changed jerseys during the extended break.
posted by ardgedee at 9:04 AM on June 16, 2018 [2 favorites]


i want to listen to these guys argue about human anatomy for the rest of my life
posted by poffin boffin at 9:04 AM on June 16, 2018


Finally we have a good play-by-play commentator on Fox Sports. It’s a shame they’re reserving the foreign announcers for the down ticket games, since they’re more knowledgeable and do a better job of evoking the feel of the plays.
posted by ardgedee at 9:06 AM on June 16, 2018


And, I have to point out, they’re lesss prone to missing entire plays, the way the bland white American announcers do.
posted by ardgedee at 9:08 AM on June 16, 2018 [1 favorite]


Oh I love these announcers. They have no qualms about snarking when it’s called for.
posted by ardgedee at 9:22 AM on June 16, 2018


Watching with the sound off while waiting at my kids swimming lessons. Pretty sure the coach just signaled that the baby was crying and someone should pick it up.
posted by nubs at 9:27 AM on June 16, 2018


“Iceland beats Argentina 1-1!” is the best call
I’ve heard in years.
posted by Etrigan at 9:28 AM on June 16, 2018 [1 favorite]


Peru and Denmark both are having trouble controlling the ball. I wonder whether this is the usual “they changed the ball just for the World Cup and fuck if we can tell how it’s going to behave” problem that’s been plaguing the previous few tournaments as well.

In the previous game, there were a couple times where Messi rejected the ball and demanded another. I wonder whether these players know they can do that. Or maybe they just don’t have the reputation of Messi to back up such a demand.
posted by ardgedee at 9:32 AM on June 16, 2018


I...did not think that was a penalty.
posted by nubs at 9:45 AM on June 16, 2018


Well that was something.
posted by nubs at 9:46 AM on June 16, 2018


When the penalty happened, I yelled "Don't let Messi take it!" Because, as much as I love him, he is garbage at penalty kicks. They should have given it to Aguero or DiMaria. My husband now thinks I should replace Sampaoli as coach. This happens all the time at Barcelona, you'd think people would learn by now. He's magical, but not at everything.
posted by ceejaytee at 9:47 AM on June 16, 2018 [2 favorites]


It was definitely a penalty if you see it from one of the camera angles; the Danish player very obviously rakes the foot out from under the Peruvian player.
posted by ardgedee at 9:47 AM on June 16, 2018 [1 favorite]


Yeah, I didn’t see that camera angle until after I posted.
posted by nubs at 9:48 AM on June 16, 2018 [1 favorite]


Fair. I was skeptical about whether it was a penalty until I saw that angle too.
posted by ardgedee at 9:48 AM on June 16, 2018


It’s the half. It’s kind of a nothingburger game, But both teams are playing with a lot of energy and passion, so unlike a couple of yesterday’s games it’s been enjoyable to watch
posted by ardgedee at 9:52 AM on June 16, 2018


I’m also generally rubbish at being able to spot them. But that angle made it really clear.
posted by nubs at 9:52 AM on June 16, 2018


I honestly am still half-expecting to wake up from a dream. It’s absurd to me that Iceland just held Argentina to a draw in a World Cup match. An Argentine team featuring Messi, no less.

I went along with my fiancée and son to watch the game with an Icelandic friend and his family in Helsinki. No one there was expecting anything other than a heroic defeat at best.

This was just incredible! Iceland’s goal and that penalty save will be burned into the Icelandic collective subconscious fo generations.
posted by Kattullus at 9:53 AM on June 16, 2018 [9 favorites]


He was looking for contact, but definitely a penalty.
It was just horribly taken. That stutter at the start set himself off more than Schmeichel.
posted by lmfsilva at 9:53 AM on June 16, 2018


Oh, and yeah, that was me quoted in the Guardian liveblog. One of my most nerdish hobbies is writing to Guardian football liveblogs.
posted by Kattullus at 9:54 AM on June 16, 2018 [5 favorites]


trujillo and perez-navarro are making this game so excellent in my ears
posted by poffin boffin at 9:55 AM on June 16, 2018


noo
posted by poffin boffin at 10:18 AM on June 16, 2018


That developed quickly
posted by nubs at 10:18 AM on June 16, 2018


What a chance for Peru
posted by nubs at 10:19 AM on June 16, 2018


That was a lovely drive to goal by Denmark.
posted by ardgedee at 10:19 AM on June 16, 2018


And holy fuck so close to an equalizer.
posted by ardgedee at 10:19 AM on June 16, 2018


Goddamn, Peru are having absolutely none of the luck. In a just world it would be 3-0 to the Peruvians.
posted by Kattullus at 10:20 AM on June 16, 2018 [1 favorite]


oh god hip to the face
posted by poffin boffin at 10:33 AM on June 16, 2018


"Cold water is not enough my friend."

Seriously, give these announcers all the games.
posted by the primroses were over at 10:34 AM on June 16, 2018 [1 favorite]


SO CLOSE I AM CRY
posted by poffin boffin at 10:38 AM on June 16, 2018 [1 favorite]


Peru is having worst luck.
I want Perez-Navarro and Trujillo calling all the games from now on.
posted by ardgedee at 10:38 AM on June 16, 2018 [3 favorites]


I swear, if Peru scores in the next 10 minutes I'm gonna scream loud enough to wake my 73-year-old neighbor from her nap (Sorry Beverley).
posted by Ufez Jones at 10:40 AM on June 16, 2018 [1 favorite]


PDF of group stage announcer assignments for Fox Sports for US broadcast viewers who want to know which other matches Perez-Navarro and Trujillo are calling.
posted by the primroses were over at 10:47 AM on June 16, 2018 [3 favorites]


Five minutes
posted by nubs at 10:49 AM on June 16, 2018


why not mexico-germany, this is an attack on me personally fox sports
posted by poffin boffin at 10:50 AM on June 16, 2018


Someone needs to rewrite The Bridge of San Luis Rey except it’s about this match and why God allows such a travesty of a result.
posted by Kattullus at 10:54 AM on June 16, 2018 [2 favorites]


anyway surely when i wake up at 7am tomorrow keylor navas will recognize this great sacrifice and not let me down
posted by poffin boffin at 10:56 AM on June 16, 2018 [1 favorite]


By the by, here’s a reaction shot of Iceland coach Heimir Hallgrímsson when Messi’s penalty is saved. He’s the one on the right in the dugout.
posted by Kattullus at 11:13 AM on June 16, 2018 [6 favorites]


Very Scandihoovian.
posted by Quasirandom at 11:22 AM on June 16, 2018 [1 favorite]


I want Perez-Navarro and Trujillo calling all the games from now on.

Yeeeessss that was so much better than the ultra-serious, extremely basic commentary from the earlier matches. Perez-Navarro is extremely agile -- he tripped up Trujillo a few times, which I'll allow because it was hilarious. They seem to be getting some good press already. I hope Fox pays attention and assigns them more matches.
posted by grandiloquiet at 11:25 AM on June 16, 2018


Also I didn't think I cared who won Peru-Denmark until Peru spent the entire game attacking and now I am crushed by their defeat.
posted by grandiloquiet at 11:27 AM on June 16, 2018 [2 favorites]


I want one of those Nigerian warm up jackets
posted by nubs at 11:53 AM on June 16, 2018


The Nigerians are dapper as fuck.
posted by Ufez Jones at 11:55 AM on June 16, 2018 [4 favorites]


Then I guess I’m cheering for the dapper gents.
posted by nubs at 11:56 AM on June 16, 2018


I think the Panini Cheapskate crew named this afternoon's contest. "The sexy-kit derby"
posted by fifteen schnitzengruben is my limit at 11:59 AM on June 16, 2018 [1 favorite]


One odd side effect of having Iceland at the World Cup is that Nigeria vs. Croatia, a game I would have hoped would be a goalfest is now a game I'm beseeching the gods to make a boring nil-nil draw so that Iceland ends Match Day 1 tied for first in the group. Come on Subasic and Uzoho, I believe in your goalkeeping prowess!
posted by Kattullus at 12:00 PM on June 16, 2018 [1 favorite]


Holy lugnut, even the Nigerian goalkeeper’s kit is stunningly beautiful.
posted by Kattullus at 12:08 PM on June 16, 2018


I want one of those Nigerian track suits. It should work like dazzle camo for fat people and I'm 100% down with that.
posted by lmfsilva at 12:18 PM on June 16, 2018


What a stupid, unlucky goal!

Come on, Super Eagles! Equalize! And then both teams should settle for a 1-1 draw. I can settle for a 4-way tie for first.
posted by Kattullus at 12:34 PM on June 16, 2018


Own goal. I hate those.
posted by ceejaytee at 12:35 PM on June 16, 2018 [1 favorite]


PK for Modric. I was hoping Nigeria could equalize, but it's going to be tough now.
posted by ceejaytee at 1:31 PM on June 16, 2018 [1 favorite]


Ah well, Iceland will be tied for second, that’s not so bad.
posted by Kattullus at 1:31 PM on June 16, 2018 [1 favorite]


> PDF of group stage announcer assignments for Fox Sports for US broadcast viewers who want to know which other matches Perez-Navarro and Trujillo are calling.

For quick reference, four matches in the first round. Basically they're assigned to Peru's and Mexico's:

(today) Saturday, June 16, 12:00 PM: Peru vs. Denmark
Saturday, June 23, 11:00 AM: Korea Republic vs. Mexico
Tuesday, June 26, 10:00 AM: Australia vs. Peru
Wednesday, June 27, 10:00 AM: Mexico vs. Sweden
posted by ardgedee at 6:45 PM on June 16, 2018


Is anybody watching Costa Rica-Serbia this lovely Sunday morning? Fifteen minutes in, it’s been a very lively game with both sides being very aggressive on offense. No telling whether either team can bear up for the whole ninety, though.
posted by ardgedee at 5:17 AM on June 17, 2018


I'm watching the game while my kids make me father's day breakfast. It's quite enjoyable. Costa Rica has been very good at creating chances, but don't seem to know how to actually kick the ball at the net.
posted by 256 at 5:44 AM on June 17, 2018


I am watching Costa Rica-Serbia here in Helsinki! It’s not the greatest game I’ve ever watched, but it’s the World Cup so by definition it’s one of the most important 90 minutes in the national psyches of these two football loving cultures. Also, it’s the World Cup, so by definition it’s better than it not being the World Cup.
posted by Kattullus at 5:47 AM on June 17, 2018


Calvo’s skill at pulling on his opponents’ clothing has finally gotten the recognition it deserves.
posted by ardgedee at 6:14 AM on June 17, 2018


It must be Father’s Day with all these cards being given.
posted by ardgedee at 6:17 AM on June 17, 2018 [1 favorite]


I think the first red card of the tournament is coming from this game. Both teams doing a lot of ankle-biting.
posted by lmfsilva at 6:21 AM on June 17, 2018


The dog woke me up and I was going to go back to bed as it's ridiculously early. Then my phone announced two yellow cards in rapid succession and I wanted to see a game that is going to end up 10 a side.
posted by fifteen schnitzengruben is my limit at 6:26 AM on June 17, 2018


Serbian players had been aiming for the players rather than the ball from pretty early on. I think at some point Costa Rican players finally lost their tolerance and haven’t been able to keep themselves above the fray.
posted by ardgedee at 6:27 AM on June 17, 2018


This has certainly been the most interesting Guardian liveblog so far. "No man can eat 50 eggs?" Hard-right nationalists trying to shut down a reggae performance of La Marseillaise?

Perhaps they're not as focused on the game as they could be.
posted by clawsoon at 6:39 AM on June 17, 2018 [2 favorites]


> 90 min ...Gamboa drives a low shit that Stojkovic fields comfortably enough.

From the Guardian’s liveblog, copied for posterity.
posted by ardgedee at 6:52 AM on June 17, 2018


What a shambles at the end. Amazing.
posted by fifteen schnitzengruben is my limit at 6:55 AM on June 17, 2018 [1 favorite]


Of course this mess with the VAR had to happen with a Portuguese on the replay booth.
posted by lmfsilva at 6:56 AM on June 17, 2018 [1 favorite]


Uneventful games make for interesting Guardian liveblogs and vice versa.
posted by Kattullus at 6:57 AM on June 17, 2018 [2 favorites]


Kinda feel like Serbia got away with some crap there at the end
posted by nubs at 6:59 AM on June 17, 2018 [1 favorite]


The hand on the face wasn't egregious, but Matic and the Costa Rica staff who grabbed the ball should have been both sent-off.
posted by lmfsilva at 7:08 AM on June 17, 2018 [1 favorite]


i give up no early morning games for me. anyway chicharito.
posted by poffin boffin at 7:42 AM on June 17, 2018


Come on Mexico!
posted by languagehat at 7:53 AM on June 17, 2018


Important question for US viewers: did you just see Jared Leto singing for a promo for the Germany/Mexico ad? I feel like I'm going crazy.
posted by grandiloquiet at 7:53 AM on June 17, 2018


Oh dang, I meant to go out and get horchata to drink during the Mexico match. I guess I'll just have to get horchata *and* tacos afterwards.
posted by ardgedee at 7:56 AM on June 17, 2018


That German goalkeeper is tall
posted by nubs at 7:58 AM on June 17, 2018


Attack! Too high, but way to go!
posted by languagehat at 8:02 AM on June 17, 2018


Good, Neuer is one of those goalkeepers who likes to wander away from the goal.
posted by languagehat at 8:04 AM on June 17, 2018


With the exception of Brazil in 2006, all reigning world champions this century have crashed out of the World Cup at the group stage. Will Germany buck that trend? It would be interesting if they failed to get into the second round, but Germany and Brazil are both teams which win even when they should lose, so probably it’s at least the quarterfinals for Germany. Interestingly that’s where they crashed out last time around they had possession of the World Cup trophy.
posted by Kattullus at 8:07 AM on June 17, 2018


Good chance for Mexico here...
posted by languagehat at 8:08 AM on June 17, 2018


...but too high.
posted by languagehat at 8:09 AM on June 17, 2018


Another free kick...
posted by languagehat at 8:14 AM on June 17, 2018


Wow
posted by nubs at 8:14 AM on June 17, 2018


...saved by Neuer.
posted by languagehat at 8:14 AM on June 17, 2018


Like the Guardian said, this is a cracking game.
posted by languagehat at 8:16 AM on June 17, 2018


so many beautiful but ultimately frustrating saves in so many games so far
posted by poffin boffin at 8:16 AM on June 17, 2018 [1 favorite]


This is great footy so far
posted by nubs at 8:17 AM on June 17, 2018


> so many beautiful but ultimately frustrating saves in so many games so far

That is in fact the official name of the game.
posted by ardgedee at 8:17 AM on June 17, 2018


I made a date to play tennis at noon and I am now really regretting it...
posted by 256 at 8:18 AM on June 17, 2018 [1 favorite]


maybe crazed intruders burst into your home and stole your racket, sadly forcing you to reschedule?
posted by poffin boffin at 8:22 AM on June 17, 2018 [2 favorites]


Nice save by Ochoa.
posted by languagehat at 8:22 AM on June 17, 2018


Yet another free kick... goes nowhere.
posted by languagehat at 8:24 AM on June 17, 2018


Manuel Neuer is a very handsome man and in a just world there would be a Neuer-cam so I wouldn't be limited to occasional sightings during penalty kicks and Mexico's attempts at goal.

Also mr needled is having to hear me point out how attractive Neuer is every time he is on screen and I am afraid this has driven him to drink.
posted by needled at 8:28 AM on June 17, 2018 [1 favorite]


Mexico is looking damn good. But they need to score.
posted by languagehat at 8:29 AM on June 17, 2018


There are more shots in these last few minutes than I saw in all of the Serbia v Costa Rica game.

Everybody having a nice lie-down after the collision.
posted by fifteen schnitzengruben is my limit at 8:30 AM on June 17, 2018


The local Mexican saying is “ jugamos como nunca, perdimos como siempre”; ir we played like never before, lost like always
posted by dhruva at 8:33 AM on June 17, 2018 [1 favorite]


Ahhh! Just too far ahead
posted by nubs at 8:34 AM on June 17, 2018


GOAL
posted by nubs at 8:34 AM on June 17, 2018


YAAAS
posted by poffin boffin at 8:34 AM on June 17, 2018


Goooooooooooooooool
posted by dhruva at 8:35 AM on June 17, 2018 [2 favorites]


Great run, no result ...
posted by languagehat at 8:35 AM on June 17, 2018


...GOOOL!!!
posted by languagehat at 8:35 AM on June 17, 2018


Woo! One of those attacks had to pay off eventually.
posted by the primroses were over at 8:35 AM on June 17, 2018


Hurray Mexico! What a beautiful break and well taken goal!
posted by Kattullus at 8:35 AM on June 17, 2018


Danger for Mexico now
posted by nubs at 8:37 AM on June 17, 2018


And now it's on!
posted by ersatz at 8:37 AM on June 17, 2018


Does Germany have anyone with speed? It feels like Mexico is running circles around them.
posted by robocop is bleeding at 8:37 AM on June 17, 2018


Uh-oh...
posted by languagehat at 8:38 AM on June 17, 2018


Fox Sports’ announcers declare the goal with the enthusiasm of your banker informing you that you qualify for lower interest on your loan than you had been budgeting for.
posted by ardgedee at 8:38 AM on June 17, 2018


Ooh that was close
posted by dhruva at 8:38 AM on June 17, 2018


...whew.
posted by languagehat at 8:38 AM on June 17, 2018


What a save
posted by nubs at 8:39 AM on June 17, 2018


What a save by Ochoa!
posted by Kattullus at 8:39 AM on June 17, 2018


Yeah I had to switch back to telemundo now that my brain has awakened enough
posted by poffin boffin at 8:39 AM on June 17, 2018 [3 favorites]


Man, if Mexico had slightly better ball control on these fast breakouts...
posted by nubs at 8:42 AM on June 17, 2018 [1 favorite]


Man, Mexico is doing really well at getting the ball back from the Germans.
posted by languagehat at 8:43 AM on June 17, 2018


Oh man can they keep up this pace for another half?
posted by needled at 8:43 AM on June 17, 2018


Some of the Mexican players already look tired.
posted by Kattullus at 8:45 AM on June 17, 2018


Damn, looked like a second goal there.
posted by languagehat at 8:45 AM on June 17, 2018


Peep!
posted by languagehat at 8:46 AM on June 17, 2018


Vela playing pretty well.
posted by ersatz at 8:46 AM on June 17, 2018


I knew that defense might be a weakness for this German team, but I'm sort of shocked how weak they look through the midfield. It sort of seems like their midfielders are simultaneously not pushing forward aggressively enough to generate good chances, and pushing too far forward to avoid being caught flat-footed by Mexican fast breaks.
posted by firechicago at 8:47 AM on June 17, 2018 [1 favorite]


Cracking first half. Mexico's pace has the Germans off balance,, but when Germany has control they look good too.
posted by nubs at 8:48 AM on June 17, 2018


This game has been everything I wanted. Fireball Mexicans vs. Slow and Stoic Germans. And El Tri with the lead.
posted by Ufez Jones at 8:50 AM on June 17, 2018 [2 favorites]


time for the halftime rush on tostones
posted by poffin boffin at 8:51 AM on June 17, 2018


Maybe the Germans underestimated México a bit sine they won 4-1 at their last encounter
posted by dhruva at 8:53 AM on June 17, 2018


I thought the same about the German midfield looking unbalanced. When you have Özil being put in the position of running back to cover defensively, something’s very off.
posted by Kattullus at 8:53 AM on June 17, 2018


Half time panel for the Canadian coverage declaring the Germans look awful, "forget about defending their title, they need to figure out how to get in this game."

I thought they had periods of looking dangerous, but they are slow.
posted by nubs at 8:57 AM on June 17, 2018


Second half, Mexico attacking already.
posted by languagehat at 9:03 AM on June 17, 2018


Announcers keep talking about how Germany isn’t panicking. A moral triumph, no doubt.
posted by languagehat at 9:05 AM on June 17, 2018 [1 favorite]


Mexico seems more content with sitting back a little
posted by nubs at 9:08 AM on June 17, 2018


Aaah! Needed a better pass
posted by nubs at 9:14 AM on June 17, 2018


Bah, great attack wasted.
posted by languagehat at 9:14 AM on June 17, 2018


Awful pass!
posted by ersatz at 9:14 AM on June 17, 2018


I’m not surprised Vela’s been substituted, he looked completely out of gas on that last break.
posted by Kattullus at 9:15 AM on June 17, 2018


Officially annoying the hell out of my neighbor now by yelling at the TV. Sorry Beverley.
posted by Ufez Jones at 9:16 AM on June 17, 2018 [2 favorites]


Germany having more quality ball in this half
posted by nubs at 9:16 AM on June 17, 2018


Better decision making and Mexico would be three or four up. Horribly afraid they’re going to fade and get punished.
posted by daveje at 9:17 AM on June 17, 2018


I’m very critical of chicharito; his genius is to be in the right place at the right time, but more often than not he screws it up
posted by dhruva at 9:17 AM on June 17, 2018


beverly needs to get hype.
posted by poffin boffin at 9:17 AM on June 17, 2018 [5 favorites]


Mexico just can't seem to make a good pass on those breaks; its cost them on those chances
posted by nubs at 9:19 AM on June 17, 2018


That was scary.
posted by languagehat at 9:22 AM on June 17, 2018


Werner not looking great when finishing so far
posted by ersatz at 9:26 AM on June 17, 2018


Mexico under siege now
posted by dhruva at 9:26 AM on June 17, 2018


beverly needs to get hype.

Literally laughed out loud. She's cool. Been my neighbor for a few years. She's used to my bullshit.
posted by Ufez Jones at 9:26 AM on June 17, 2018


Dammit.
posted by languagehat at 9:26 AM on June 17, 2018


My wife just informed me I'm starting to look like a soccer fan as I raised my arms and yelled when he was pulled down in the box. So I may lack knowledge, but apparently I'm getting the attitude right.
posted by nubs at 9:29 AM on June 17, 2018 [2 favorites]


ouch, right in the face!!
posted by Pendragon at 9:30 AM on June 17, 2018


I watch with headphones so my neighbors don't actually know why I am screaming in 3 languages alone in my silent house.
posted by poffin boffin at 9:30 AM on June 17, 2018 [3 favorites]


39 year old Rafa Márquez coming on. This may be the last World Cup featuring an outfield player older than me.
posted by Kattullus at 9:31 AM on June 17, 2018 [1 favorite]


I left behind the days of players in any sport being older than I a long time ago. Now they are all kids.
posted by nubs at 9:33 AM on June 17, 2018 [2 favorites]


Needed some support there
posted by nubs at 9:34 AM on June 17, 2018


Oh so close!
posted by languagehat at 9:34 AM on June 17, 2018


I watch with headphones so my neighbors don't actually know why I am screaming in 3 languages alone in my silent house.

Inquiring minds want to know what's the third language.
posted by ersatz at 9:37 AM on June 17, 2018 [1 favorite]


Once again a missed pass
posted by nubs at 9:38 AM on June 17, 2018


Playing a counter attacking game is pretty pointless if you keep screwing up the final pass!
posted by daveje at 9:39 AM on June 17, 2018 [1 favorite]


Come on Mexico!! Finish it!!
posted by Pendragon at 9:40 AM on June 17, 2018


Has anyone ever successfully pled their way out of a card?
posted by nubs at 9:40 AM on June 17, 2018


(in honor of germany, today it's yiddish swears)
posted by poffin boffin at 9:43 AM on June 17, 2018 [1 favorite]


Gah!
posted by nubs at 9:46 AM on June 17, 2018


Fox Commentary Summary: "If that went in, it would have been a goal."
posted by robocop is bleeding at 9:46 AM on June 17, 2018 [2 favorites]


I was sure that was going in!
posted by languagehat at 9:47 AM on June 17, 2018


Has anyone ever successfully pled their way out of a card?

Working the refs is for the benefit of your future self, I think.

FINAL WHISTLE NOW PLEASE
posted by grandiloquiet at 9:47 AM on June 17, 2018


Dios mio. Mi corazon.
posted by Ufez Jones at 9:47 AM on June 17, 2018


That was quite something...

(We swear in Greek, Portuguese and English (with the odd German swearword))
posted by ersatz at 9:48 AM on June 17, 2018 [1 favorite]


Hanging on here. 3 minutes added
posted by nubs at 9:48 AM on June 17, 2018


I hope Ochoa gets an awesome gig out if this
posted by grandiloquiet at 9:48 AM on June 17, 2018


There it is!
posted by nubs at 9:50 AM on June 17, 2018


apparently seismometers in Mexico City may have registered the reaction to Lozano's goal
posted by karayel at 9:50 AM on June 17, 2018 [4 favorites]


Empty net!
posted by Ufez Jones at 9:50 AM on June 17, 2018


Well played Mexico!
posted by ersatz at 9:50 AM on June 17, 2018


Yay!
posted by the primroses were over at 9:51 AM on June 17, 2018


yeeee
posted by poffin boffin at 9:51 AM on June 17, 2018


Mexico wins!!!

As a Dutchman I'm supporting Mexico so I'm really happy they're off to such a good start!!
posted by Pendragon at 9:51 AM on June 17, 2018


Yay!!
posted by languagehat at 9:51 AM on June 17, 2018


I made some rash financial promises wrt the potential number of goals scored in this game so that was a tense game for me.
posted by poffin boffin at 9:52 AM on June 17, 2018


This was just wonderful to watch! What a performance from Mexico!
posted by Kattullus at 9:53 AM on June 17, 2018


Jorge Campos must be beaming right now. That was awesome.
posted by Ufez Jones at 10:05 AM on June 17, 2018 [1 favorite]


Here they’re treating it like they won the final
posted by dhruva at 10:12 AM on June 17, 2018


If you told me sometime around last year Herrera would be crucial leading us to the title and then he would hold off Germany's midfield in the World Cup, I'd probably laugh.

Absolutely massive performance from Mexico, who could have won it by a bigger margin.
posted by lmfsilva at 10:12 AM on June 17, 2018


I'm sad I missed the second half of that game, but I am VERY excited that Mexico was able to hold their lead. Mexico is my team and it always feels like they look very strong on paper and then fall apart on the world stage. I'm really hoping this is the year that changes!

Oh and I have definitely made exclamations in English, Spanish, and French while watching these games.
posted by 256 at 10:16 AM on June 17, 2018 [1 favorite]


Here they’re treating it like they won the final

One of my very favorite travel/soccer memories was going to a HON/MEX CONCACAF qualifier in San Pedro Sula in 2001. Honduras pulled off the upset and I've never seen people that ecstatic or party harder (and I was in France when they won the Cup in '98).
posted by Ufez Jones at 10:49 AM on June 17, 2018


And there we go. Vai Brasil!
posted by ersatz at 10:53 AM on June 17, 2018


México won that with aplomb.
Germany failed in an interesting way - like France, they couldn’t seem to decide how to be a team. Unlike France, I expect Germany to fix their shit. Because if they don’t they don’t stand a chance.

Which is kind of great! How nothing is really turning out like the pundits suggested.
posted by From Bklyn at 10:55 AM on June 17, 2018 [1 favorite]


Neymar, held together by duct tape at this point.
posted by poffin boffin at 10:57 AM on June 17, 2018


Feeling strangely satisfied to see the German side so decisively defeated. Is there a word for that, I wonder?
posted by Elizabeth the Thirteenth at 11:01 AM on June 17, 2018 [4 favorites]


Mostra Tua Força, Brasil!
posted by needled at 11:07 AM on June 17, 2018


Elizabeth the Thirteenth: Is there a word for that, I wonder?

In Icelandic we have the word “Þórðargleði”, which means “joy of Þórður”, who was a dude who liked that sort of thing.
posted by Kattullus at 11:10 AM on June 17, 2018 [3 favorites]


So close!
posted by ersatz at 11:11 AM on June 17, 2018


Fingertips
posted by nubs at 11:13 AM on June 17, 2018


We are now fully warmed up and yelling in unison early and often at missed goals. Not heard from the neighbors yet, keeping fingers crossed.
posted by needled at 11:14 AM on June 17, 2018


That close up of Neymar’s hair moving in unison like a hard plastic wig was a beamed straight out of the uncanny valley.
posted by Kattullus at 11:17 AM on June 17, 2018 [1 favorite]


And there we go!
posted by languagehat at 11:19 AM on June 17, 2018


Fucking wow, golazo!
posted by ersatz at 11:19 AM on June 17, 2018


Nice
posted by nubs at 11:20 AM on June 17, 2018


I was just thinking “eh, I don’t care that much about Brazil this year,” but that goal was thrilling.
posted by languagehat at 11:21 AM on June 17, 2018 [1 favorite]


Or golaço rather.
posted by ersatz at 11:21 AM on June 17, 2018


Holy shit, that was nice.
posted by Ufez Jones at 11:21 AM on June 17, 2018


I can't decide if I love or hate Neymar's hair.

I did love that lovely strike from Coutinho from 25 meters out, though. Wow.
posted by fifteen schnitzengruben is my limit at 11:22 AM on June 17, 2018


“If Mexico wins, I want tacos.”
“Does that mean if Germany wins, you want to get...”
“I dunno. Doesn’t matter. Tacos.”
“Tacos aren’t German.”
“I would get different tacos!”
“‘Difference tacos.’”
“Anyway. I think if Brazil wins, I want tacos.”
“If a Brazilian heard you associate tacos with Brazil cuisine...”
“No wait, you have to hear what I want if Switzerland wins.”
posted by ardgedee at 11:25 AM on June 17, 2018 [2 favorites]


Goalpost for the assist!
posted by needled at 11:28 AM on June 17, 2018


“No wait, you have to hear what I want if Switzerland wins.”

Fondue?
posted by nubs at 11:34 AM on June 17, 2018


I was thinking tacos, tbh. Maybe with queso.
posted by ardgedee at 11:36 AM on June 17, 2018 [2 favorites]


What was up with that yellow card? Telemundo showed it from two different angles, and it looked like Neymar barely got touched (though both angles had Neymar's body shielding the point of contact, so I suppose it's possible the Swiss player gave him a shove in the back in a way that was hidden from the cameras).
posted by firechicago at 11:37 AM on June 17, 2018


Fondue on Rösti?
posted by mmascolino at 11:38 AM on June 17, 2018


firechicago: Lichtensteiner grabbed Neymar by the shoulder and pulled him back and down while he was at full sprint..
posted by ardgedee at 11:39 AM on June 17, 2018


He was grabbed around the head
posted by ersatz at 11:40 AM on June 17, 2018


pão de queijo?
posted by research monkey at 11:45 AM on June 17, 2018


It also wasn't the first blatant foul on Neymar and I guess the ref had enough of it.
posted by fifteen schnitzengruben is my limit at 11:46 AM on June 17, 2018 [1 favorite]


pão de queijo?

Sim, por favor!
posted by ersatz at 11:59 AM on June 17, 2018


1:1 as Brazil loses track of Zuber
posted by nubs at 12:09 PM on June 17, 2018


THIS CHANGES EVERYTHING
posted by ardgedee at 12:09 PM on June 17, 2018


What an absurdly simple goal! What the heck was the Brazilian defense doing?
posted by Kattullus at 12:09 PM on June 17, 2018


Holy crap, SUI equalizes!
posted by languagehat at 12:09 PM on June 17, 2018


Oh boy. Brasil has to play now.
posted by ersatz at 12:09 PM on June 17, 2018


Here I was just thinking that this Brazil-Switzerland match was rather tame, at least compared to the other two matches I've watched live so far (ARG-ISL and DEU-MEX), and not two minutes later SUI ties it up.

Apparently I am bad luck for the favorites. I am ok with this, since even if my teams lose it makes for much more exciting watching.
posted by firechicago at 12:11 PM on June 17, 2018 [1 favorite]


I had been getting the impression Brazil was feeling complacent, just kicking the ball around and enjoying their own mastery.
posted by languagehat at 12:11 PM on June 17, 2018


That's true; if you relax, you should be ready to pay the price. (Always be two goals up before relaxing)
posted by ersatz at 12:13 PM on June 17, 2018


Yeah Brazil was too relaxed
posted by nubs at 12:16 PM on June 17, 2018


ardgedee - if this ends in a draw, taco fondue
posted by nubs at 12:17 PM on June 17, 2018 [1 favorite]


They’re not so relaxed now!
posted by languagehat at 12:17 PM on June 17, 2018


ardgedee - if this ends in a draw, taco fondue

Fermented shark tacos dipped in gruyere. Gotta get Iceland in there somewhere.
posted by firechicago at 12:21 PM on June 17, 2018


Nicely done Switzerland! They’ve been playing a really respectable game. I did not expect them to score but it was no gimme.
posted by From Bklyn at 12:22 PM on June 17, 2018


Respectable aside from repeatedly trying to take down Neymar, yeah.
posted by ardgedee at 12:25 PM on June 17, 2018


As an Icelander it behooves me to mention that shark should only be eaten very cold. It was stored outside and only eaten in wintertime. It tastes like a strong cheese if it’s eaten cold. Once it warms up it tastes like ammonia.
posted by Kattullus at 12:26 PM on June 17, 2018 [1 favorite]


Man, they are beating on Neymar
posted by nubs at 12:27 PM on June 17, 2018


I would try hakarl, but only in situ.
posted by ardgedee at 12:29 PM on June 17, 2018 [1 favorite]


Neymar is almost as much a liability as a benefit sometimes due his selfish showpony antics, but for his own good and that of the team it’d be be best to take him off. He’s not looking fit and he’s getting serial fouls on his injured foot.
posted by daveje at 12:29 PM on June 17, 2018


Yup.
posted by languagehat at 12:31 PM on June 17, 2018


Where my penalty at?
posted by ersatz at 12:32 PM on June 17, 2018


That was a bullshit noncall.
posted by ardgedee at 12:32 PM on June 17, 2018


Shouldn’t VAR have caught that?
posted by nubs at 12:35 PM on June 17, 2018


Whatever the outcome, Switzerland have adjusted their game very well to Brazil’s tactics. During the first half and into the second, a Brazilian player would try, and often succeed, to foul any Swiss player trying to play his way up the field on the ground. So the Swiss have started sending a lot of long passes through the air up the flanks, which has discombobulated the Brazilians and pulled them out of their defensive shape. Mind you, this hasn’t led to a goal yet.
posted by Kattullus at 12:38 PM on June 17, 2018 [1 favorite]


I like Brazil, but I hope the tie holds. They need a wake up call, and SUI has earned it.
posted by languagehat at 12:39 PM on June 17, 2018


That was so close!
posted by ersatz at 12:48 PM on June 17, 2018


Damn, this is exciting!
posted by languagehat at 12:48 PM on June 17, 2018


Brazil generating all the pressure
posted by nubs at 12:49 PM on June 17, 2018


I wasn’t even going to watch this game!
posted by languagehat at 12:49 PM on June 17, 2018 [1 favorite]


I think it’s this - teams that are able
To adjust their game vs those that aren’t. This was one of the more surprising things about France and less so, Germany. Both theams did not respond as a team to the style of the other team’s play.
It’s important to remember that these teams don’t play together all that much, and so the coach’s ability to get them to gel as a team is as important as any tactical work they might do. This was always Germany’s big advantage - about half the team played for Bayern so they had a team culture ready developed.
It’s not baseball but football is not uninteresting.
posted by From Bklyn at 12:51 PM on June 17, 2018 [1 favorite]


Uh-oh, free kick for Brazil...
posted by languagehat at 12:53 PM on June 17, 2018


Neymar is getting a beating without any repercussion.
posted by ersatz at 12:53 PM on June 17, 2018


Last chance, surely
posted by nubs at 12:54 PM on June 17, 2018


And it’s a draw.
posted by languagehat at 12:55 PM on June 17, 2018


Lots of topsy turviness this weekend.
posted by ardgedee at 12:56 PM on June 17, 2018


A fun Cup so far!
posted by languagehat at 12:57 PM on June 17, 2018 [1 favorite]


I wasn’t even going to watch this game!
posted by languagehat at 12:49 PM on June 17
[+] [!]


I know! And it turned into a real corker!

Also, Neymar complains too much. Messi gets just as much abuse, the real response is in kind retaliation, meted out by the designated marauder.
posted by From Bklyn at 12:57 PM on June 17, 2018 [2 favorites]


I have to say, after seeing all these fancied teams losing or having to settle for draws, the more impressive I find France’s ability to dig out a win against Australia.
posted by Kattullus at 12:57 PM on June 17, 2018


Tunisia-England is probably the game to watch tomorrow. By which I mean, the best game to follow through The Guardian’s liveblog. The schedule certainly seemed stacked to concentrate the highlight games on the weekend. I don’t think there’s much money being put on any of the teams tomorrow making it to the final.
posted by ardgedee at 1:04 PM on June 17, 2018


Today's game still does not make me forget that Switzerland won Eurovision 1988 with Celine Dion.
posted by needled at 1:05 PM on June 17, 2018 [1 favorite]


So, in 11 games so far, we have had, by my count, two upsets (Mexico over Germany and Iran over Morocco) , two VERY surprising ties (ISL-ARG and BRA-SUI), one unexpected slaughter (Russia overperforming in the opener) and once unlikely close call (FRA-AUS).

This is what I like to see. Everything that you think you know about who's gonna beat who is now suspect. I predict Korea 3-1 over Sweden tomorrow morning.
posted by 256 at 1:10 PM on June 17, 2018 [2 favorites]


Nah - that’ll be another 1-1 tie.
posted by Quasirandom at 1:31 PM on June 17, 2018


I fell asleep this is such an injustice!

I have no particular attachments to any teams or any players tomorrow so maybe? it will be a relaxing day? before i cry loudly through all 90+ minutes of colombia-japan?
posted by poffin boffin at 1:55 PM on June 17, 2018


I always support South Korea as my secondary underdog team, and that definitely looks like the most interesting game tomorrow (though I really don't see how either can hope to get out of group at this point). I agree that Colombia-Japan is the game to watch on Tuesday, but I expect a decisive win for Colombia.
posted by 256 at 1:59 PM on June 17, 2018




From Bklyn: Also, Neymar complains too much. Messi gets just as much abuse, the real response is in kind retaliation, meted out by the designated marauder.

I have played with recreational players who have this attitude. It is dumb and stupid and makes the game unpleasant for everyone. I don't want to play in games that are decided by who can time their ankle-breaking slide tackle the best. I don't want to watch it, either.

Messi was built with HGH into an indestructible honey badger. What he is able to survive should not be the standard that all players are expected to survive.
posted by clawsoon at 3:29 PM on June 17, 2018 [2 favorites]


I predict Sweden over South Korea 37-0.
posted by Chrysostom at 8:15 PM on June 17, 2018


Colombia’s group, with Japan, Poland and Senegal, is incredibly open. Japan are in absurd disarray, having sacked the coach who led them to qualification, reportedly because he wasn’t picking some of the established stars. Who knows how they’ll fare? Poland are a good side with some aging players in key roles, and when age catches up with you in football, it’s very unforgiving. But they’re by no means over the hill and have some exciting young players too. Colombia reached such a high last time around that I fear any setbacks could cause them to unravel, but equally if they start well could go far. And Senegal, if they click could go deep in the tournament, but they could just as well never get going at all if they don’t click.

Of all the groups, this one is the most obviously unpredictable. All these teams are capable of greatness, and equally capable of leaving the tournament in disgrace.
posted by Kattullus at 12:46 AM on June 18, 2018


... meted out by the designated marauder.

I have played with recreational players who have this attitude. It is dumb and stupid and makes the game unpleasant for everyone...

Messi was built with HGH into an indestructible honey badger....


I agree with you and respectfully disagree with you. I find the targeted attacking of the opponents that stand out ('You think you're so good? I'm gonna kick you in the freakin' shins, man!') is despicable. But also well nigh impossible to referee against. Which leaves teammates having to look out for each other. (Messi's last free kick against Iceland went directly into Bjarnasson's face - is that retaliation? or just a whoops from Messi, greatest honey badger to ever don the Albiceleste's uniform?) Of course, if the opportunity arises and the referee is there, penalty's should be awarded appropriately and I think generally are.

Also, Neymar's a squeaky little whiner. I kid, I kid. I really like Neymar's playing, I just don't think he was targeted any more than any other high-danger player.
posted by From Bklyn at 1:52 AM on June 18, 2018


> I predict Sweden over South Korea 37-0.

You’ve been reading the Korean internets, haven’t you.
posted by needled at 3:36 AM on June 18, 2018 [1 favorite]




The Fox Sports color commentator astutely notes that either Korea or Sweden have to win in order to get the three points necessary to put them even with Mexico.

Were there really no other English speakers available in the world available to talk about soccer?
posted by ardgedee at 5:08 AM on June 18, 2018 [1 favorite]


In general I'm digging the retro Adidas kits, but the font used for numbers and names look wrong.
posted by lmfsilva at 5:08 AM on June 18, 2018


The letters don't bother me, but some of the numerals are just wrong.
posted by 256 at 5:11 AM on June 18, 2018


> Also, Neymar's a squeaky little whiner. I kid, I kid. I really like Neymar's playing, I just don't think he was targeted any more than any other high-danger player.

Switzerland drew nineteen fouls in yesterday’s match. Ten of them were against Neymar.
posted by ardgedee at 5:14 AM on June 18, 2018 [2 favorites]


Oh my god the announcers on Fox Sports right now are meatheads.
posted by ardgedee at 5:22 AM on June 18, 2018


Part of the reason I watch on Telemundo is because I have yet to encounter a decent American english language soccer announcer.
posted by 256 at 5:25 AM on June 18, 2018


The Swedish team is a lot livelier than I was expecting. They seem to have a clear game plan and everyone knows what they should be doing. The South Koreans seem a lot more hesitant. They’re probably better players on the whole, but they don’t appear to have much cohesion.
posted by Kattullus at 5:27 AM on June 18, 2018


It seems a bit early in the game for world-class players to be suffering from charlie horses and leg cramps.
posted by ardgedee at 5:27 AM on June 18, 2018


(That’s not in reference to Park Joo-Ho, who apparently landed wrong after jumping for the ball.)
posted by ardgedee at 5:30 AM on June 18, 2018


Korea might be fielding some ghost players, as the men we can see are frequently kicking the ball to parts of the field where nobody else is holding a position but are positions where you would expect one of their teammates to be positioned.
posted by ardgedee at 5:34 AM on June 18, 2018 [2 favorites]


I really like Neymar's playing, I just don't think he was targeted any more than any other high-danger player.

I think it's the psychological impact of seeing his tiny little bird bones about to be crunched. Neymar looks more delicate than other players.
posted by clawsoon at 5:38 AM on June 18, 2018


ardgedee: Korea might be fielding some ghost players, as the men we can see are frequently kicking the ball to parts of the field where nobody else is holding a position but are positions where you would expect one of their teammates to be positioned.

Yeah, that’s what I meant about cohesion. They don’t seem to have any set patterns of play. Even when they break at speed the player with the ball has to look around to see where the other players are. If you compare with Mexico yesterday, they always knew where to expect to see their team members. Mexican passes were often inaccurate, but at least they always went to a player.
posted by Kattullus at 5:40 AM on June 18, 2018 [1 favorite]


Rob Smyth is loudly complaining about this match in The Guardian’s liveblog. Of course Sweden promptly makes a credible (albeit failed) attempt on goal.

The officiating in this match is atrocious. I can’t even blame Fox Sports for this, unless you all outside the US are seeing some entirely other game.
posted by ardgedee at 5:44 AM on June 18, 2018


Neymar is also fouled more than any other player because he also makes absolutely no effort to stay up. Defenders might as well go hard to rile him up or knock him around a bit.
posted by lmfsilva at 5:45 AM on June 18, 2018


It has to be said that for all the clarity of their gameplan, Sweden aren’t looking like a team that will leave an imprint on the tournament. I’m hoping we’ll see Guidetti on the field today, I enjoy watching him play.
posted by Kattullus at 5:51 AM on June 18, 2018


Oh gejsus, cleats down hard on the calf of Koo’s calf.
posted by ardgedee at 6:09 AM on June 18, 2018


Penalty kick to Sweden.

That was a pointlessly desperate play by Kim on Claesson.
posted by ardgedee at 6:22 AM on June 18, 2018


Korea’s minds are elsewhere now. They weren’t really in the game, bar a few minutes here or there, but they’re even less so now.
posted by ardgedee at 6:31 AM on June 18, 2018


Wow. Some serious attempts to equalize in the last few.
posted by 256 at 6:51 AM on June 18, 2018


During the break my three-year-old asked me to come out to play in the nice weather and I’m glad my World Cup addiction doesn’t extend far enough for me to have even stopped to consider not to go. Half an hour later it all ended in tears when I didn’t let him ride a scooter down a rocky hill, but all that will be a cherished memory many years time in a way that a World Cup game between two limited teams from charming countries won’t be.
posted by Kattullus at 6:52 AM on June 18, 2018


Oh well, this was a good game to get some homework and studying done to. A game’s highlight reel doesn’t usually capture everything interesting that happened in the game, but in this case aside from Sweden’s goal and maybe two or three goal attempts, the highlight reel is going to have to be padded out with some of the more egregious fouls, so you can pretty much see everything there was worth seeing today in the three-minute postgame wrapup.
posted by ardgedee at 6:54 AM on June 18, 2018


If there's any attempts to move the World Cup to 48 teams, I do hope it's 16 3 team groups where only the first team qualifies, because this was bullshit.
posted by lmfsilva at 7:01 AM on June 18, 2018


My understanding is that it's already been decided that 2026 will be 48 teams in 16 groups of 3, but the top two will qualify and there will be an extra knockout stage.
posted by 256 at 7:03 AM on June 18, 2018


I'd rather have a 64 team knockout, then. We need more high-stakes matches, not group stage slogs where two draws still give a decent shot at qualification on the last match.
posted by lmfsilva at 7:11 AM on June 18, 2018 [1 favorite]


My Sweden prediction was slightly off in magnitude, but was *directionally* correct.
posted by Chrysostom at 7:11 AM on June 18, 2018 [2 favorites]


Three-team groups sounds like a recipe for disaster to me. It’s much too likely that it will lead to games where some mutually beneficial result is possible. As it is now that’s extremely unlikely. This New York Times article explains in greater detail.
posted by Kattullus at 7:16 AM on June 18, 2018 [1 favorite]


Yeah, I really like the idea of more teams, but I kinda hate the idea of three team groups (especially with two going on) for various reasons.

I kinda wish it was practical to just go straight to 64 and keep the format basically identical with an additional knockout round, but that would be absurdly expensive and result in some very bad soccer.
posted by 256 at 7:26 AM on June 18, 2018


It is a little depressing to realize that, even if we went to 64 teams, Canada probably still wouldn't qualify without being a host...
posted by 256 at 7:38 AM on June 18, 2018


Did I hear correctly that Panama is fielding a 38 year old player?

I have to ask because one of Fox Sports’ pregame hosts has also been repeatedly confusing the Belgian and Panamanian teams, so I’ve got trust issues.
posted by ardgedee at 7:45 AM on June 18, 2018


I'm 38, and I think I nearly threw out my back just watching a game.
posted by 256 at 7:46 AM on June 18, 2018 [2 favorites]


Sounds like a morning I should be glad to be at work, as it sounds more enjoyable than watching the footy.
posted by nubs at 7:48 AM on June 18, 2018


A quick check though doesn't show any 38 year olds on the Panama squad (two at 37 though, including the captain).

Oldest player on the Belgium squad is 32.
posted by 256 at 7:53 AM on June 18, 2018


Yeah I think this is a game that will stay on for background noise while I get work done.
posted by ardgedee at 8:01 AM on June 18, 2018


The problem with the solution presented by the NYT is that 3rd places should never qualify. Portugal bumbled through Euro 2016 to a trophy because of that. Ideally, groups should never qualify more than half of the teams taking part, unless we're talking about some competitions where the group stages are mostly about sorting teams for knockouts, a bit like like the american season format.

With three group teams and one advancing, Pot A would start against Pot C, then Pot B would play against Pot C, and the third match between Pot A and Pot B. Assuming both teams would win, or at least not lose their Pot C match (teams that wouldn't even qualify for this world cup, or some that did qualify but would be moved down if Italy, US or Chile didn't poo-poo'd when it mattered), it would almost be like a preliminary knockout round, where the only advantage would be for the team that put more on Pot C team knowing a draw would have them through. But it would be brutal for everyone involved.
posted by lmfsilva at 8:06 AM on June 18, 2018


what the hell was that by Mertens?
posted by progosk at 8:08 AM on June 18, 2018 [1 favorite]


Belgium thought this was going to be easier...
posted by progosk at 8:37 AM on June 18, 2018


second good save by Penedo.
posted by progosk at 8:39 AM on June 18, 2018


and a third, lucky one.
posted by progosk at 8:42 AM on June 18, 2018


It could be organized in such a way that there are eight six-team groups with the top two teams advancing. The main problem is that would mean there would be 136 games, but is that really so bad? I mean, it’s ludicrously expensive and an organizational nightmare, but every team will get five matches at the World Cup even if it might mean they’re mathematically eliminated before the last two games would be played. Okay, maybe we should just stick to 32 teams.
posted by Kattullus at 8:42 AM on June 18, 2018


The problem with the solution presented by the NYT is that 3rd places should never qualify.

I think there's a couple of things to try to balance for here - one is the possibility of match collusion, and the other is the engagement of the fans. Both of these are somewhat inter-related, in that the perception of collusion & match-fixing will disengage the fans. By keeping 4 team groups, you limit the collusion possibilities, and by allowing for some "wild-card" spots you open up for more fan engagement/excitement about potential outcomes & opportunities; at least that's been my experience in watching North American sports leagues introduce them. I'm not a deep enough football fan to maybe understand the potential problems with having a few 3rd place teams qualify into the knock-out stage - what is the objection? Is it just that they didn't play well enough in the group stage to earn a berth, or is there something else?
posted by nubs at 8:43 AM on June 18, 2018 [1 favorite]


He is really keeping Panama afloat.

That foul call just now seemed unnecessary to me though.
posted by 256 at 8:43 AM on June 18, 2018


As a Red Bulls supporter (two of Panamas back 4 are ours) this is been pretty equally painful and inspiring.

Blas Perez is a legend, but i think he wont be 38 until next march.
posted by Exceptional_Hubris at 8:45 AM on June 18, 2018 [1 favorite]


Belgium should have two or three goals already, but their ball control has been atrocious.
posted by ardgedee at 8:47 AM on June 18, 2018


Having made half-time with a clean slate against Belgium must feel like winning to them.
posted by progosk at 8:50 AM on June 18, 2018 [1 favorite]


Belgium are yet another fancied team which shows up without a clear way of playing. Whichever one of the big guns can get their house in order will be the instant favorite. If none of them can, it could be anyone’s year.
posted by Kattullus at 8:52 AM on June 18, 2018 [2 favorites]


but their ball control has been atrocious.

We've seen this a few times; is it the ball or is it that these teams seem to not have their act together yet?
posted by nubs at 9:00 AM on June 18, 2018


Oh, sure it's the ball's fault. :-D
posted by progosk at 9:02 AM on June 18, 2018


Can we just crown the ball World Cup Champion?
posted by 256 at 9:05 AM on June 18, 2018


That was a nice shot, Dries.
posted by progosk at 9:07 AM on June 18, 2018


I haven’t seen much complaint about the ball. However some pitches have been criticized for having overly long grass, which makes the surface less conducive to passing the ball quickly along the ground. One way to deal with that is to score volleys like Mertens just did.
posted by Kattullus at 9:07 AM on June 18, 2018


I haven’t been paying attention to this game at all, but I’m glad I had it on in the background — that was a lovely goal.
posted by languagehat at 9:08 AM on June 18, 2018


That Mertens strike was something else. Lovely goal.
posted by Dysk at 9:10 AM on June 18, 2018


However some pitches have been criticized for having overly long grass, which makes the surface less conducive to passing the ball quickly along the ground.

Italian commentators literally just said this.
posted by progosk at 9:10 AM on June 18, 2018


seems like there was a fair amount of slipping around on one of the surfaces yesterday as well, although now im struggling to remember which match i was watching when it occurred to me
posted by Exceptional_Hubris at 9:11 AM on June 18, 2018


Wow, almost, by Murillo!
posted by progosk at 9:14 AM on June 18, 2018 [1 favorite]


(Half of Panama's been carded...)
posted by progosk at 9:17 AM on June 18, 2018 [1 favorite]


The Belgium team is playing as if they were all introduced to each other for the first time 10 minutes before kickoff.
posted by daveje at 9:24 AM on June 18, 2018 [1 favorite]


To be fair, there's a Nainggolan-sized hole in their line-up...
posted by progosk at 9:26 AM on June 18, 2018 [1 favorite]


I know we’ve all gotten used to it in the last few years, but can we take a minute to appreciate just how over the top Eden Hazard’s name. If I were reading a book where a character has that name I’d find it a bit much.
posted by Kattullus at 9:27 AM on June 18, 2018 [2 favorites]


Well, that worked.
posted by progosk at 9:28 AM on June 18, 2018


My last comment would’ve been more apposite if Eden Hazard would’ve had anything to do with that goal, but it was wholly created by Kevin de Bruyne and finished off by Romelu Lukaku, whose names are comparatively non-fictionish.
posted by Kattullus at 9:30 AM on June 18, 2018


I’m not excited about Belgium’s play, but they certainly deserve this win.
posted by languagehat at 9:30 AM on June 18, 2018 [1 favorite]


Kattullus: I know we’ve all gotten used to it in the last few years, but can we take a minute to appreciate just how over the top Eden Hazard’s name. If I were reading a book where a character has that name I’d find it a bit much.

I see your Eden Hazard and raise you boxing's Tyson Fury.
posted by clawsoon at 9:31 AM on June 18, 2018


I’m also not excited about the idea of a bunch more teams in future Cups. Do you really want more games like this?
posted by languagehat at 9:32 AM on June 18, 2018


Well done Cooper, always stay hungry.
posted by progosk at 9:33 AM on June 18, 2018


Another nice goal!
posted by languagehat at 9:35 AM on June 18, 2018


That's what Murillo should have done...
posted by progosk at 9:35 AM on June 18, 2018


Just how many Hazards does Belgium have?
posted by needled at 9:48 AM on June 18, 2018


clawsoon: I see your Eden Hazard and raise you boxing's Tyson Fury

Yeah but does Tyson have a brother named Thorgan Fury? I think not.
posted by Kattullus at 9:50 AM on June 18, 2018 [2 favorites]


Belgium needs better coaching, because the Courtoises, De Bruynes and (literally) Hazards can only take one team so far before being tactically outmatched.

Tournaments often feature poor grass because it usually needs one year or so to root and the maintenance staff to get used to the particular conditions of the stadium. I think a lot of these stadiums one year ago were still in construction or had artificial pitches. Or, you know, Russian winter.

I'm not a deep enough football fan to maybe understand the potential problems with having a few 3rd place teams qualify into the knock-out stage - what is the objection? Is it just that they didn't play well enough in the group stage to earn a berth, or is there something else?
Part of the problem of allowing "best thirds" is that it becomes a lot more important to luck out and fall on a group with mid-tier talent. Portugal finished third at the Euros behind Iceland and Hungary, while Turkey and Albania were the worst thirds in groups with Croatia/Spain and France/Switzerland. It's one thing if all thirds qualify, which heh, makes the group stage just a bit more than aperitif, but another if some teams are at a disadvantage because they were drawn in a much stronger group and must avoid being hammered in goal difference by the better teams in the group. Plus, teams start playing to get 4 points, which means, beat pot 4 team and park the bus to get an extra point from the other two teams. A lot of the awfully negative play in Euro 2016 stemmed from that.
posted by lmfsilva at 9:51 AM on June 18, 2018


Belgium's on a 20-game unbeaten streak, really? Who'd have thunk it.
posted by progosk at 9:51 AM on June 18, 2018


Actually, on the subject of his name, “Eden Hazard” sounds like the kind of economics jargon that gets thrown around in Wall Street Journal op-eds: “While it may seem like a good idea to not have people starve to death on street corners, if we give them food we risk running straight into an ‘Eden Hazard’”.
posted by Kattullus at 9:55 AM on June 18, 2018 [3 favorites]


Belgium’s Eden Hazard but England’s Kieran Trippier.
posted by ardgedee at 10:59 AM on June 18, 2018 [1 favorite]


What a save.
posted by lmfsilva at 11:03 AM on June 18, 2018


Two scares already from Tunisia.
posted by languagehat at 11:04 AM on June 18, 2018


Actually, Tunisia is looking pretty feckless.
posted by languagehat at 11:09 AM on June 18, 2018


England also has a Harry Kane. I’ll bet he’s a whirlwind.
posted by ardgedee at 11:11 AM on June 18, 2018


And Kane scores!
posted by languagehat at 11:11 AM on June 18, 2018


In fact he is, having just scored at ten minutes.
posted by ardgedee at 11:11 AM on June 18, 2018


Wow! That was atrocious defending by Tunisia. How can they just forget about Harry Kane like that during a corner? Hopefully this means we’ll see an open game.
posted by Kattullus at 11:12 AM on June 18, 2018


The Fox Sports announcer declares this with the tone of somebody stating the inevitable with an excited “I told you so!” tone.
posted by ardgedee at 11:12 AM on June 18, 2018


The Guardian liveblog has declared that this means England will win the World Cup.
posted by nubs at 11:13 AM on June 18, 2018


What happened to Tunisia’s goalie? He’s on the floor after nearly every goal attempt.
posted by ardgedee at 11:14 AM on June 18, 2018


Looked like he tweaked his shoulder defending lingard's opportunity.
posted by Exceptional_Hubris at 11:15 AM on June 18, 2018


Boy, they weren't kidding when they said the stadium has a mosquito problem.
posted by lmfsilva at 11:17 AM on June 18, 2018


People in the stands have finally found their trumpets.
posted by ardgedee at 11:19 AM on June 18, 2018


England in cohesive-football-at-the-world-cup shocker!
posted by daveje at 11:22 AM on June 18, 2018 [1 favorite]


The Guardian liveblog is now worried that it is going too well
posted by nubs at 11:22 AM on June 18, 2018


I can’t remember seeing the English national team play this well this century. Maybe 2004.
posted by Kattullus at 11:30 AM on June 18, 2018


was that handball call legit?
posted by 256 at 11:30 AM on June 18, 2018


It looked wrong to me, but it was hard to say. Either way, it’s put a bee up HOLY SHIT PENALTY
posted by Kattullus at 11:33 AM on June 18, 2018


Penalty!
posted by languagehat at 11:33 AM on June 18, 2018


This might add some excitement...
posted by languagehat at 11:34 AM on June 18, 2018 [1 favorite]


it would seem the guardian live blog was wise to be concerned. . .
posted by Exceptional_Hubris at 11:35 AM on June 18, 2018


...and we’re tied!
posted by languagehat at 11:35 AM on June 18, 2018


Okay! This is exciting!

Also, Sassi is an unreasonably beautiful man.
posted by 256 at 11:37 AM on June 18, 2018 [1 favorite]


Wondering if maybe I can duck out to a pub for a late, long lunch...
posted by nubs at 11:38 AM on June 18, 2018


England’s ability to steal defeat from the jaws of victory has generations of precedence.
posted by ardgedee at 11:39 AM on June 18, 2018


These are troubling times. It seems that Dele Alli has tweaked something. Fabian Delph is getting ready to come on for the Tottenham forward. Gareth Southgate looks concerned.

I don't know who any of these people are, but the Guardian liveblog seems to be very much in a state of fretting.
posted by nubs at 11:39 AM on June 18, 2018


that was a truly frenetic exchange in front of goal, england seem anything but settled.
posted by Exceptional_Hubris at 11:40 AM on June 18, 2018


That was a crazy scrum at the goal! It seems impossible that England didn't score.
posted by 256 at 11:40 AM on June 18, 2018 [1 favorite]


Back in my PW days my boss and I would both nip out to a bar for occasions like this.
posted by languagehat at 11:41 AM on June 18, 2018


Have a taco for me, nubs.
posted by ardgedee at 11:41 AM on June 18, 2018


I admit that I am at a loss for who to pull for here. Usually in games where I don't have a compelling reason to support one team or the other, I pull for the underdog.

But is Tunisia the underdog to England, or is England the underdog to England?
posted by 256 at 11:43 AM on June 18, 2018 [2 favorites]


A true quandary.
posted by languagehat at 11:44 AM on June 18, 2018


Holy crap, that was close!
posted by languagehat at 11:44 AM on June 18, 2018


this game is insane and I am enjoying it way too much
posted by karayel at 11:45 AM on June 18, 2018 [1 favorite]


OK, I'll wait for the half and nip out for some lunch. Hopefully can catch most of the 2nd half...
posted by nubs at 11:46 AM on June 18, 2018


I was going to say that there will be a lot of beer drunk in England during halftime to steady the nation’s nerves, but having experienced English drinking culture, I’m not sure there will be an appreciable difference from how it would be if the English national team were cruising comfortably.
posted by Kattullus at 11:46 AM on June 18, 2018 [1 favorite]


FIFA ratings have England at 12 currently and Tunisia at 21, globally.
posted by Exceptional_Hubris at 11:46 AM on June 18, 2018


Though if you are a trend-minded person its worth noting that Englands historical average ranking since FIFA rankings were adopted is a 10 while Tunisias average is 36. . .
posted by Exceptional_Hubris at 11:47 AM on June 18, 2018


That’s gonna leave a bruise.
posted by ardgedee at 11:48 AM on June 18, 2018


Yeah, but every time England plays they have to share the pitch with their worst adversary.
posted by 256 at 11:48 AM on June 18, 2018 [2 favorites]


Another game I was thinking of skipping, but this appears to be the Cup of Games that Must Be Seen to Be Believed.
posted by languagehat at 11:48 AM on June 18, 2018 [1 favorite]


Exceptional_Hubris: FIFA ratings have England at 12 currently and Tunisia at 21, globally.

Ah, but England’s Ghost of Failures Past has a FIFA ranking of -1.
posted by Kattullus at 11:49 AM on June 18, 2018 [1 favorite]


England should have had two penalties by now.
posted by daveje at 12:11 PM on June 18, 2018 [2 favorites]


Is it me or has Gareth Southgate aged by about a decade since the game began?
posted by Kattullus at 12:18 PM on June 18, 2018


Only problem with the pub; they don’t have the sound on and the Guardian liveblog doesn’t work great on my mobile. I need some dry humour!
posted by nubs at 12:32 PM on June 18, 2018


Does anyone know what these lights are which are being waved about by the spectators? Phones?
posted by Kattullus at 12:32 PM on June 18, 2018


It feels like a decade since the game began.
posted by languagehat at 12:36 PM on June 18, 2018


Holy shit the streaming app just dropped all live streams. Timing!
posted by ardgedee at 12:37 PM on June 18, 2018


Come on, England. If I’m going to duck out of the office, at least do something.
posted by nubs at 12:38 PM on June 18, 2018


Only problem with the pub; they don’t have the sound on and the Guardian liveblog doesn’t work great on my mobile. I need some dry humour!

I'm listening to the Internet radio broadcast, which I think might originate from the BBC. Might be worth tracking down in your radio broadcast area. (In Canada: TSN radio.)
posted by clawsoon at 12:41 PM on June 18, 2018


Thanks clawsoon!
posted by nubs at 12:43 PM on June 18, 2018


No problem. Sounds like England is using WWI tactics on the Tunisia goalkeepers.
posted by clawsoon at 12:46 PM on June 18, 2018


It has to be said, that whether they hold on for a draw or lose the game, you have to applaud the Tunisians for their top-drawer quality time-wasting.
posted by Kattullus at 12:47 PM on June 18, 2018 [1 favorite]


Kane!!
posted by languagehat at 12:50 PM on June 18, 2018


Kane, again unmarked
posted by nubs at 12:50 PM on June 18, 2018


Well deserved, but a little sad.
posted by 256 at 12:50 PM on June 18, 2018


A win in extra time!
posted by languagehat at 12:51 PM on June 18, 2018


Not so fast, it is England
posted by nubs at 12:52 PM on June 18, 2018 [2 favorites]


Eh, if Tunisia wanted me to feel sorry for them they shouldn’t have left Kane unmarked.
posted by languagehat at 12:52 PM on June 18, 2018 [1 favorite]


It’s remarkable that after the first goal the Tunisians didn’t realize that it would be better not to allow Harry Kane a free header half a yard from goal.
posted by Kattullus at 12:53 PM on June 18, 2018 [2 favorites]


Radio announcers when 4 minutes of extra time announced: "That's... that's wrong!"

Radio announcers after goal: "4 minutes sounds about right. Maybe 30 more seconds."
posted by clawsoon at 12:53 PM on June 18, 2018 [2 favorites]


Well, that was a labored win for England, but a win. So far no team has looked like World Champions to be, and none of the four teams playing their first game tomorrow have been widely tipped as contenders. Though Colombia might be dark horses.
posted by Kattullus at 12:57 PM on June 18, 2018


Iceland looked like world champions to me....
posted by 256 at 1:11 PM on June 18, 2018 [3 favorites]


Trivia time: Has it ever happened that the final has ended up being between two teams that had already met in the group stage? And was the result of the final the same as the earlier result?
posted by 256 at 3:00 PM on June 18, 2018


West Germany famously bested Hungary in 1954, after getting trounced by the Magyars in the group phase. I can’t remember another one off the top of my head.
posted by Kattullus at 3:02 PM on June 18, 2018


I only ask because I'm looking forward to an Iceland-Argentina final...
posted by 256 at 3:04 PM on June 18, 2018 [1 favorite]


Oh, and Katullus, I'd been meaning to ask: 6-degrees-of-separation standards suggest that most Icelanders should have a member of the national squad as a friend of a friend. Do you?
posted by 256 at 3:09 PM on June 18, 2018


Hehehe no, not that I’m aware of, anyway.
posted by Kattullus at 3:21 PM on June 18, 2018 [1 favorite]


Too few friends i guess...
posted by 256 at 3:22 PM on June 18, 2018


Or, I suppose, super elite athletes could be concentrated in a particular social circle rather than being evenly distributed among the population. Could go either way, really...
posted by 256 at 4:07 PM on June 18, 2018


Well, it’s 23 guys, and the population is 350 thousand. It’s not that unlikely that there isn’t a direct link. Also, a friend might have a connection but it’s not something that people talk about in daily conversation.
posted by Kattullus at 11:31 PM on June 18, 2018


I was too busy getting dressed down yesterday (during the World Cup - o tempora, o mores) and missed the game. Oh well.

Apparently Salah will be back today?
posted by ersatz at 11:51 PM on June 18, 2018


Trivia time: Has it ever happened that the final has ended up being between two teams that had already met in the group stage? And was the result of the final the same as the earlier result?

this question has been asked elsewhere and a pretty solid answer given. Looks like Katullus is right about Hungary-Germany being the only final but there have been a couple of semis and a play off where teams met for a second time.
posted by biffa at 1:24 AM on June 19, 2018 [1 favorite]


The English commentators were going through the entire hero's journey of commentating Feelings last night:

First 10 min: Upbeat, pleased
England goal: Ecstatic, optimistic, clearing the diary to watch Germany v England in the finals
Penalty, Tunisia goal: "It's only the first half, it's still good, it's still good" a la Homer Simpson and the bbq pig
Majority of the second half: The fingerpointing begins - These subs don't make sense, where has the energy gone, they need to convert all these attempts, the heat, the ref, VAR, the midges
Late England goal: Classic English deterimination and patience pays off, we always knew it would! Kane is god, Gazza Sazza is genius.
posted by like_neon at 2:10 AM on June 19, 2018 [4 favorites]


Oh no! James Rodriguez has been deemed not fit enough to start today. He’s got muscle fatigue. I feel for poffin boffin and other Colombia fans waking up in he Americas to these news.
posted by Kattullus at 4:45 AM on June 19, 2018


If Quintero is starting in his place, James must be really knackered, because Quintero will last 20 minutes before lowering his socks and putting his hands on his hips any time Japan has the ball.
posted by lmfsilva at 4:49 AM on June 19, 2018 [1 favorite]


this started fast.
posted by lmfsilva at 5:06 AM on June 19, 2018


My mad tip for Japan to advance from the group is looking a lot better now. Oh poor Colombia! What an inauspicious way to start your World Cup campaign.
posted by Kattullus at 5:06 AM on June 19, 2018 [1 favorite]


silly Sanchez...
posted by progosk at 5:08 AM on June 19, 2018


Japan got lucky quick and early. Wow, what a stupid, stupid thing for Sanchez to do.
posted by ardgedee at 5:10 AM on June 19, 2018


I wsn’t even going to watch this game until we remembered it’s being called by Perez-Navarro and Trujillo. They can make a complete snoozer into good television.
posted by ardgedee at 5:14 AM on June 19, 2018 [1 favorite]


Definitely not a snoozer so far. Since the penalty both teams have had “death chances” as the Icelandic idiom has it.
posted by Kattullus at 5:18 AM on June 19, 2018


Japan’s goalie is contesting Colombia’s goal there, but the ball is way too obviously across the line.
posted by ardgedee at 5:41 AM on June 19, 2018


Nice try by the goalie to pretend that didn't go over the line.
posted by ceejaytee at 5:41 AM on June 19, 2018


I love the sneaky under-a-jumping-wall free kick. Well done, Quintero! James couldn’t have done it better.
posted by Kattullus at 5:41 AM on June 19, 2018 [1 favorite]


Oof. That looked like it should have been an easy save.
posted by 256 at 5:41 AM on June 19, 2018


Quintero with the sneaky under the wall free kick. Just enough power to get it past the goal line.
posted by lmfsilva at 5:42 AM on June 19, 2018


Where "easy" is defined by an overweight guy in an office chair criticizing world-class athletes....
posted by 256 at 5:43 AM on June 19, 2018


I’d like to see more goals scored in open play, it feels like most of the games recently have been on penalties and free kicks. But the matches have generally been good so I’m out in high dudgeon about this.
posted by ardgedee at 5:43 AM on June 19, 2018


Ah, turns out Japan isn’t contesting the position of the ball. They’re complaining that the penlty was awarded in the first place.
posted by ardgedee at 5:44 AM on June 19, 2018


I mean, that is a direct result of the fact that this seems to be a particularly rough and tumble World Cup, with most players not hesitating to intentionally foul an opponent with a clear goal scoring opportunity.
posted by 256 at 5:45 AM on June 19, 2018


The matches on the first few days seemed to be pretty low in roughhousing, but it’s been ramping up. Belgium-Panama was a slapfest.
posted by ardgedee at 5:50 AM on June 19, 2018


My fiancée made the observation that Colombia coach José Pékerman must have been attractive in his younger years and damn if she isn’t right (scroll down).
posted by Kattullus at 5:50 AM on June 19, 2018 [3 favorites]


Yeah, the matches over the last few days have been really physical. It's frustrating to watch at times.

I can understand Japan contesting that free kick being awarded. To my mind, that was clearly a foul on Japan, not vice versa. Worst decision in the games I've watched so far in my opinion, but the reffing has generally been pretty good.
posted by Dysk at 5:53 AM on June 19, 2018


I think the ref was compensating for the previous foul in the penalty area that he hadn't called for Colombia. Not great, but understandable...
posted by progosk at 5:55 AM on June 19, 2018 [1 favorite]


According to Perez-Navarro, Sanchez’ red card was the second-quickest red card issued in World Cup play. So, congrats for the entry in the record books dude.
posted by ardgedee at 6:06 AM on June 19, 2018


ZZ may have been named after ZZ Top, Kattullus (I have the Guardian blog open)
posted by ersatz at 6:14 AM on June 19, 2018 [1 favorite]


Yes, but was ZZ Top possibly named after Zidane? HOW DEEP DOES THE CONSPIRACY GO
posted by ardgedee at 6:24 AM on June 19, 2018 [2 favorites]


We're seeing a lot more time with Japan on the attack than I would have expected, but the Colombian defense seems very strong when the pressure is on.
posted by 256 at 6:25 AM on June 19, 2018


goooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooool
posted by 256 at 6:31 AM on June 19, 2018


Ospina is not having a great day... 2:1 Japan
posted by progosk at 6:31 AM on June 19, 2018


Very well deserved. That was a beautiful attack just before the corner, and Japan arguably should have been awarded a penalty.
posted by 256 at 6:32 AM on June 19, 2018 [1 favorite]


Well played goal. Japan had been regularly making decent shots at goal that get blocked or go wide; I was about to write a comment that as long as Japan keeps this cadence, something will eventually go in. But the team beat me to it.
posted by ardgedee at 6:34 AM on June 19, 2018


oh! That was a wasted chance by Colombia. And then another. And then another.
posted by 256 at 6:36 AM on June 19, 2018


Wow, Colombia woke up fast.
posted by ardgedee at 6:36 AM on June 19, 2018


Japan is really playing as a team. They always know exactly where their teammates are as though they had 360 degree vision.
posted by 256 at 6:43 AM on June 19, 2018


I love this cup. Not a single result to take for granted this year.
posted by 256 at 6:54 AM on June 19, 2018 [2 favorites]


Well deserved Japan. Great game to watch.
posted by Dysk at 6:55 AM on June 19, 2018 [1 favorite]


Hear hear.
posted by progosk at 6:55 AM on June 19, 2018


The lineup today is so good. Both of the remaining games should be very interesting. I'm really curious to see if the Russia from the opener makes a second appearance.
posted by 256 at 7:01 AM on June 19, 2018


The Japan win, after Korea’s loss yesterday, is not going down well in Korea.

An unspoken requirement for Korean national team coaches is to do better than Japan, and things are not looking good for Shin Tae-yong.
posted by needled at 7:15 AM on June 19, 2018 [1 favorite]


I feel for poffin boffin and other Colombia fans waking up in he Americas to these news.

god my alarm went off at 8 and i looked at it like "who did this to me" and went back to sleep
posted by poffin boffin at 7:59 AM on June 19, 2018 [1 favorite]


I skipped the first game, but I’m here for Senegal.
posted by languagehat at 8:15 AM on June 19, 2018


nice break, bad flub
posted by progosk at 8:21 AM on June 19, 2018


The hypothesis here is that with Colombia defeated, these two might be choosing to draw...
posted by progosk at 8:35 AM on June 19, 2018


Goal Senegal!
posted by languagehat at 8:40 AM on June 19, 2018


There's nothing I hate more than an own goal. Rooting for Sengal, but ow for Poland.
posted by ceejaytee at 8:41 AM on June 19, 2018 [1 favorite]


let’s hope this wakes things up!
posted by progosk at 8:41 AM on June 19, 2018


Senegal does not look like they’re even a little bit interested in a draw.
posted by languagehat at 8:42 AM on June 19, 2018


Cissé hippest coach of the tournament?
posted by progosk at 8:48 AM on June 19, 2018 [1 favorite]


Great save!
posted by languagehat at 9:11 AM on June 19, 2018


Holy shit! That weren’t no own goal!
posted by languagehat at 9:21 AM on June 19, 2018


wowsa! What a miscalculation by Chesny!
posted by progosk at 9:23 AM on June 19, 2018


(Szczesny, sorry)
posted by progosk at 9:27 AM on June 19, 2018 [1 favorite]


(It's okay, it could happen to anyone.)
posted by Quasirandom at 9:28 AM on June 19, 2018


Where’s Kattullus? He’s missing some wacky fun!
posted by languagehat at 9:29 AM on June 19, 2018


(Plus it was a actually more Krychowiak’s f-up....)
posted by progosk at 9:41 AM on June 19, 2018


Sounds like a great day on the pitch so far! Alas I’m in a day long workshop so no sneaking up to the pub for me today.
posted by nubs at 9:43 AM on June 19, 2018


What just happened??
posted by languagehat at 9:47 AM on June 19, 2018


That was pretty.

Edit: Poland scored on a header off a free kick, if you were actually asking.
posted by 256 at 9:47 AM on June 19, 2018


Krychowiak just earned his honour back.
posted by progosk at 9:47 AM on June 19, 2018 [1 favorite]


No, I saw it, I was just stunned.
posted by languagehat at 9:49 AM on June 19, 2018


It’s over! SEN 2, POL 1!
posted by languagehat at 9:55 AM on June 19, 2018


This is not a good tournament in which to be a favoured side.
posted by 256 at 9:56 AM on June 19, 2018 [2 favorites]


I have tickets to follow Senegal through the tournament, I decided not to go bc Russia...but now I'm reconsidering.
posted by doublenelson at 9:56 AM on June 19, 2018 [1 favorite]


As Cissé himself did to France, so his lions do to Poland.
posted by progosk at 9:56 AM on June 19, 2018 [1 favorite]


Gotta admit that was predictable. I always bet on Poland not making it out of the group phase and am rarely positively surprised.
posted by I claim sanctuary at 10:12 AM on June 19, 2018


I have not seen either Russia nor Egypt play yet in this tournament, what should I expect? Other than something goofy...
posted by fifteen schnitzengruben is my limit at 10:17 AM on June 19, 2018


SO!

Heading into Matchday 2, here are the standings:

Group A
  1. Russia
  2. Uruguay
  3. Egypt
  4. Saudi Arabia
Group B
  1. Iran
  2. Portugal
  3. Spain
  4. Morocco
Group C
  1. France
  2. Denmark
  3. Australia
  4. Peru
Group D
  1. Croatia
  2. Iceland
  3. Argentina
  4. Nigeria
Group E
  1. Serbia
  2. Brasil
  3. Switzerland
  4. Costa Rica
Group F
  1. Sweden
  2. Mexico
  3. South Korea
  4. Germany
Group G
  1. Belgium
  2. England
  3. Tunisia
  4. Panama
Group H
  1. Japan
  2. Senegal
  3. Poland
  4. Colombia

posted by the man of twists and turns at 10:31 AM on June 19, 2018 [2 favorites]


and here are Matchday 2 games:

#1 Russia vs #3 Egypt (Group A) - St Petersburg

Wednesday 20 June
#2 Portugal vs #4 Morocco (Group B) - Moscow (Luzhniki)

#2 Uruguay vs #4 Saudi Arabia (Group A) - Rostov-on-Don

#1 Iran vs #3 Spain (Group B) - Kazan (I think this will be an exciting match!)

Thursday 21 June
#2 Denmark vs #3 Australia (Group C)

#1 France vs #4 Peru (Group C) - Ekaterinburg

#3 Argentina vs #1 Croatia (Group D) - Nizhny Novgorod (I think this will be an exciting match!)

Friday 22 June
#2 Brazil vs #4 Costa Rica (Group E) - St Petersburg

#4 Nigeria vs #2 Iceland (Group D) - Volgograd

#1 Serbia vs #3 Switzerland (Group E) - Kaliningrad

Saturday 23 June
#1 Belgium vs #3 Tunisia (Group G) - Moscow (Spartak)

#3 South Korea vs #2 Mexico (Group F) - Rostov-on-Don (I think this will be an exciting match!)

#4 Germany v #1 Sweden (Group F) - Sochi (I think this will be an exciting match!)

Sunday 24 June
#2 England vs #4 Panama (Group G) - Nizhny Novgorod - 1pm

#1 Japan vs #2 Senegal (Group H) - Ekaterinburg

#3 Poland vs #4 Colombia (Group H) - Kazan
posted by the man of twists and turns at 10:39 AM on June 19, 2018 [4 favorites]


You can expect a lot of energy and attack from Russia. As for Egypt, it's hard to say as we haven't really seen them play.

If Egypt goes on the attack, we might see a high scoring game, but I expect Russia to get an early goal and then try to protect the win, essentially guaranteeing them an advancement out of group.
posted by 256 at 11:02 AM on June 19, 2018


Egypt not looking impressive so far.
posted by languagehat at 11:11 AM on June 19, 2018


I wonder if all Egypt has is Mo Salah. Be hard to win all by himself.
posted by ceejaytee at 11:14 AM on June 19, 2018


Nice shot by Cheryshev — too high, though.
posted by languagehat at 11:19 AM on June 19, 2018


languagehat: Where’s Kattullus? He’s missing some wacky fun!

I went to a dinner party which I found out upon arriving, to my great pleasure, to be a World Cup watching dinner party. So didn’t miss any wacky fun! I have Senegal tipped to go far at this tournament, and they lived up to my high expectations. Also, our host is taking part in some kind of prediction league and could stand to win lots of money if he ends the World Cup at the top of the rankings. Anyway, he’d been doing alright, but he’d predicted that Senegal would beat Poland 2-1, and because he got it exactly right he will shoot up the rankings, so that was exciting for him. So lots of fun and we got home just in time for Russia-Egypt.

Oh, and everyone in the dinner party agreed that both coaches in Senegal-Poland looked like featured authors at an international literary festival. My contention was that the Polish coach looked like someone whose most famous novel is an 800 page novel about the Swedish invasion of Poland in the 17th Century. The Senegalese coach seemed to me to like he’d write verse dramas in a mix of French and Wolof set in modern Dakar.
posted by Kattullus at 11:32 AM on June 19, 2018 [4 favorites]


incidentally are we going to split threads for the simultaneous match gamedays starting next week? or should we all continue to shout excitedly in one thread?
posted by poffin boffin at 11:35 AM on June 19, 2018


At some point this thread will become a bit... longish. Should it be a weekly thing?

Really pulling for Egypt, as evidently they have never won a WC game?
posted by fifteen schnitzengruben is my limit at 11:38 AM on June 19, 2018 [1 favorite]


Cheryshev and Golovin are working well together on the left. I predict a goal from that direction.
posted by languagehat at 11:41 AM on June 19, 2018 [1 favorite]


#4 Germany v #1 Sweden (Group F) - Sochi (I think this will be an exciting match!)

Sweden 7-1 over Germany.
posted by Chrysostom at 11:56 AM on June 19, 2018 [3 favorites]


Goal Russia!
posted by languagehat at 12:04 PM on June 19, 2018 [1 favorite]


Come on you Pharaohs! That goal was a little, uh ... not so golden!
posted by the quidnunc kid at 12:07 PM on June 19, 2018


Own goal from poor Egypt. What a bizarre Cup!
posted by languagehat at 12:08 PM on June 19, 2018


Football’s weird, huh? You can’t even celebrate your OWN goal! Well you could, but ... I don’t think it'd go down very well ... :-)
posted by the quidnunc kid at 12:10 PM on June 19, 2018


That was a strange goal. As far as I can tell Fathi was trying to muscle Dzyuba out of the way, but the Russian was too much of a meat-mountain for the Egyptian to budge him and ended up losing his footing and shanking the ball into his own goal as he fell down. I don’t think I’ve ever seen anything quite like it before.
posted by Kattullus at 12:11 PM on June 19, 2018 [1 favorite]


You shouldn’t try to muscle Dzyuba unless you’re Iron Man.
posted by languagehat at 12:15 PM on June 19, 2018 [2 favorites]


Oh Russia! Nice!!!
posted by the quidnunc kid at 12:15 PM on June 19, 2018


What is the record for own goals? This seems excessive.

Salah had a great chance there, then a corner goes untouched through the box! Egypt looking alive
posted by fifteen schnitzengruben is my limit at 12:16 PM on June 19, 2018 [1 favorite]


Goal Cheryshev!!
posted by languagehat at 12:16 PM on June 19, 2018 [1 favorite]


A very nice goal too... and there’s another!!
posted by languagehat at 12:18 PM on June 19, 2018 [1 favorite]


Cheryshev is chasing is in the hunt for the Golden Boot. Honestly, the way things are going this might end up as another 5-0… and as I preview Russia score a third.
posted by Kattullus at 12:18 PM on June 19, 2018 [1 favorite]


Egypt now falling apart, wtf.

Also that was a weird goal celebration
posted by fifteen schnitzengruben is my limit at 12:19 PM on June 19, 2018 [1 favorite]


Oh come on!!! I just got to the pub, suddenly Russia are turning it on for me! спасибо!
posted by the quidnunc kid at 12:20 PM on June 19, 2018 [1 favorite]


Dzyuba deserved that.
posted by languagehat at 12:20 PM on June 19, 2018 [1 favorite]


Oh the f***! That was close ... ish. Come on you Pharaohs!
posted by the quidnunc kid at 12:24 PM on June 19, 2018


Oh, that was a fine chance for Egypt... but missed.
posted by languagehat at 12:24 PM on June 19, 2018 [1 favorite]


That, on the other hand, was a very unconvincing shot.
posted by languagehat at 12:27 PM on June 19, 2018 [1 favorite]


Penalty! Mo smash! YES!!!!!
posted by the quidnunc kid at 12:29 PM on June 19, 2018


Ok enough time to make a game of this? 17 mins, plus extra time? ... maybe.
posted by the quidnunc kid at 12:30 PM on June 19, 2018


Good for Mo!
posted by languagehat at 12:30 PM on June 19, 2018 [1 favorite]


Mo!
posted by ceejaytee at 12:30 PM on June 19, 2018 [1 favorite]


Beautiful kick!
posted by Liesl at 12:31 PM on June 19, 2018 [1 favorite]


Too many of the Egyptian players are losing focus. After the penalty box wrestling match incident one of the Egyptian players paused to protest and allowed a Russian to get unchallenged to a loose ball just outside the Russian box. You can’t do that sort of thing when you’re 3-1 behind at the World Cup. Especially when, if you lose, you have to rely on Saudi Arabia beating Uruguay to not get eliminated. Which, realistically speaking, is not gonna happen.
posted by Kattullus at 12:39 PM on June 19, 2018 [1 favorite]


I enjoyed that match very much, kudos to the reds and the whites. And that guy in blue. And that other guy in green, up the other end. And that guy in the middle, in yellow ... who didn’t even touch the ball! Football, eh? Bloody hell!
posted by the quidnunc kid at 12:51 PM on June 19, 2018 [1 favorite]


Holy wow! Russia have qualified for the second round after only two games. I certainly didn’t expect that. Heck, I thought they probably wouldn’t even get out of the group. Shows what I know.
posted by Kattullus at 12:52 PM on June 19, 2018 [2 favorites]


Wait, they haven’t technically qualified yet. But again, that requires a Saudi Arabian win against Uruguay which... yeah.
posted by Kattullus at 12:57 PM on June 19, 2018 [2 favorites]


Home ground gives a welcome advantage, it seems! That’s not to throw shade on Russia’s performance/skills, but rather to wonder ... 2038 World Cup in quidnunc’s backyard? Vote #1!!!
posted by the quidnunc kid at 12:57 PM on June 19, 2018 [2 favorites]


It's still theoretically possible for KSA to beat Uruguay 1-0 and Egypt 37-0, while Uruguay beats Russia 38-0, right? In which case Russia wouldn't advance? I'm bad at math...
posted by 256 at 12:58 PM on June 19, 2018 [3 favorites]


Heh heh! Pleasure to shoot the world-Cup shit with youses peeps, MeFi! Hope you’re all good?
posted by the quidnunc kid at 1:13 PM on June 19, 2018 [1 favorite]


Things are good here. I just got promised a raise. Details to be sorted out on Thursday.
posted by 256 at 1:16 PM on June 19, 2018 [3 favorites]


2038 vote #1 scorer quidnunc kid's kid.
posted by ersatz at 1:19 PM on June 19, 2018 [1 favorite]


Good stuff, 256! Congratulations! And well-deserved (and well required!), I doubt it not!
posted by the quidnunc kid at 1:21 PM on June 19, 2018


2038 vote #1 scorer quidnunc kid's kid.

Oh yeah ... better tell quark what he’s in for! :-)
posted by the quidnunc kid at 1:22 PM on June 19, 2018


It's a great feeling to go to your boss and say "I need a raise" and be told "Yes, you do. Let's talk later this week to figure out how much..."
posted by 256 at 1:32 PM on June 19, 2018 [2 favorites]


Back on topic, this is probably a conversation Dzyuba should also be having with his manager sometime soon.
posted by 256 at 1:37 PM on June 19, 2018 [1 favorite]


Nice, 256! And how’s all you other peeps? Sending youse good thoughts, strong hopes, much loves.
posted by the quidnunc kid at 1:39 PM on June 19, 2018


I’m good! I’ve got a little holiday until the end of the month which I will fill with football. I start a big project on July 1st but I’m hoping I’ll be able to fit the World Cup around that. The weather in Helsinki has been wonderful. My son is doing well and my fiancée is on track to finish her big project by the end of this month. It’s about as an ideal a summer as I could ask for.

How’re you?
posted by Kattullus at 1:56 PM on June 19, 2018 [2 favorites]


Nice to hear, Kattullus! Shamefully, I have never had the privilege of visiting your city, but I dream of the day I’ll come to see its dreamy pleasures - if only to buy you a beer! Convey, I beg you, warm regards to your fiancée and li’l boy ... from random internet stranger! ;-)

Me is OK, all things considered. Although, several beers and a late train mean I’ll be worse tomorrow! ;-)
posted by the quidnunc kid at 2:08 PM on June 19, 2018 [2 favorites]


I'm actually going to Scandinavia with the family for two weeks, so I might be in Sverige if they advance, which would be exciting.

On the other hand, I'm pretty actively ashamed to be an American right now, so I'm kind of nervous about being overseas currently.
posted by Chrysostom at 2:24 PM on June 19, 2018 [2 favorites]


Wishing you a good and safe trip (and that you and Sweden can celebrate together)!
posted by the quidnunc kid at 2:32 PM on June 19, 2018 [1 favorite]


Hey folks - do people want a Matchday 2 post? I'm happy to make one, or everyone can stay in here for the time being and we can wait til Matchday 3. Whatever you all want.
posted by LobsterMitten at 2:32 PM on June 19, 2018 [1 favorite]


Matchday 2!
posted by languagehat at 2:56 PM on June 19, 2018 [1 favorite]


Seconded
posted by ardgedee at 3:03 PM on June 19, 2018 [1 favorite]


Thirded, this post is starting to be a bit wobbly on my iPad.
posted by Kattullus at 3:03 PM on June 19, 2018 [1 favorite]


Ok, I'm calling that good enough -- here's the Matchday 2 Fanfare post, catch you fine folks over there.
posted by LobsterMitten at 3:04 PM on June 19, 2018 [5 favorites]


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