Greenland (2020)
July 14, 2021 10:34 PM - Subscribe
Oh no! Comet Clarke is on a (physically impossible) collision course with Earth. Atlanta-based structural engineer John Garrity (Gerard Butler) and his family are the select few chosen to be evacuated to a safe haven in Greenland. Will they make it? Will they constantly be thwarted by pre-existing medical conditions, end-of-the-world parties, awkward family dynamics, those who want to steal their golden ticket, and society collapsing? Or will they make it to Greenland before the extinction-level collision occurs? On HBO Max.
My biggest problem with this movie what that absolutely none of the protagonists seemed to earn the right to stay alive at the expense of the people they leave in their wake. Like, why do these particular doofuses deserve a spot in the post-apocalyptic hellscape that will be Earth? Somehow because the dad is...a really good contractor or something, they're more deserving of a spot in a bunker even though they're told flat out that people with chronic medical conditions are ineligible? Meanwhile they peace right out of their suburb like "Bye, sorry the rest of you losers aren't cool enough to win a golden ticket to Willy Wonka's Underground Wonderland!" and we as the audience are supposed to think "Yes, I'm OK with this."
And at the end we're supposed to feel good about their situation because there are some birds or whatever? How are they planning on securing their son's supply of insulin now that the surface of the planet has turned into blackened slag? Uh, as far as I can tell this is just a prequel to The Road and I really doubt that diabetic kid is gonna make it past the cannibals once his blood sugar gets out of whack. But everyone is smiling and the music is upbeat so I guess enjoy the birds while you can, everybody.
posted by wakannai at 7:35 AM on July 15, 2021 [15 favorites]
And at the end we're supposed to feel good about their situation because there are some birds or whatever? How are they planning on securing their son's supply of insulin now that the surface of the planet has turned into blackened slag? Uh, as far as I can tell this is just a prequel to The Road and I really doubt that diabetic kid is gonna make it past the cannibals once his blood sugar gets out of whack. But everyone is smiling and the music is upbeat so I guess enjoy the birds while you can, everybody.
posted by wakannai at 7:35 AM on July 15, 2021 [15 favorites]
love the write up, ShooBoo
I'm a big fan of disaster movies, which is not generally a high volume genre, so I know I gotta take what I can get. this one was particularly weak...le sigh. (or...what wakannai said)
posted by supermedusa at 1:32 PM on July 15, 2021 [1 favorite]
I'm a big fan of disaster movies, which is not generally a high volume genre, so I know I gotta take what I can get. this one was particularly weak...le sigh. (or...what wakannai said)
posted by supermedusa at 1:32 PM on July 15, 2021 [1 favorite]
And it's supposed to get a sequel, too. Which seems particularly bonkers.
posted by tavella at 3:32 PM on July 15, 2021 [1 favorite]
posted by tavella at 3:32 PM on July 15, 2021 [1 favorite]
I thought this was going to be more like The Day After Tomorrow, a funnish spfx disaster fest but whew it starts out bleak.
posted by M Edward at 3:34 PM on July 15, 2021
posted by M Edward at 3:34 PM on July 15, 2021
I watched it awhile back on Amazon Prime video (it said it was an Amazon flick, so "free")
Wasn't overly impressed - solid, but...
posted by rozcakj at 8:17 AM on July 16, 2021
Wasn't overly impressed - solid, but...
posted by rozcakj at 8:17 AM on July 16, 2021
This was a very dumb movie. There were some fun parts.
posted by paper chromatographologist at 5:36 PM on July 20, 2021
posted by paper chromatographologist at 5:36 PM on July 20, 2021
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posted by JustSayNoDawg at 10:56 PM on July 14, 2021 [1 favorite]