The Conference (2023)
October 16, 2023 11:55 AM - Subscribe
A Swedish movie about a "team-building conference" for a small group of people with horrible jobs that is looking like it's going to be exactly what I needed this supremely irritating WFH Monday. Netflix seems to think it's a horror movie, but I think it's going to be like sinking into a hot bubble bath while drinking cocktails made from Amarula and demerol and eating a few pounds of warm chocolate chip cookies.
I've only seen half an hour of this. I watched on my lunch break after an infuriating morning spent attending a meeting at which no problems were solved and which ran over time; dealing with MS Word, which has taken a sledgehammer to its formerly functional commenting tool; and accepting a small stack of "invitations" to more required work meetings at which no problems will be solved. I cannot wait to see what happens!
I've only seen half an hour of this. I watched on my lunch break after an infuriating morning spent attending a meeting at which no problems were solved and which ran over time; dealing with MS Word, which has taken a sledgehammer to its formerly functional commenting tool; and accepting a small stack of "invitations" to more required work meetings at which no problems will be solved. I cannot wait to see what happens!
Oh, no, Orange Dinosaur Slide, I'm very sorry you have Covid. I'd've said something sooner, but I was in another meeting. We spent most of it listening to our manager regale us with tales of all the places she went on her recent vacation during which she had Covid but didn't know. Nothing tasted right at Emeril's famous whateverit'scalled restaurant and the sweet potato fries at Idon'tcaresportsbar weren't any good. Besides, all she wanted was a big bowl of pho or similar to hover over, but none of the many Asian restaurants they spent hours wandering in and out of served a hot noodle bowl. Blah blah blah etc. the take-home message being that some wait staff and some diners in New Orleans are going to get sick, now.
Technically the meeting was on Zoom, so none of us will die as a direct result of it, but I mightily resent the workplace, anyway, for trying to kill me All the God Damn Time by raising my cortisol to lethal levels. I just hope when this workday is finally over and I can return to this movie's welcoming and generous embrace that it fulfills the glorious promises it made to me in its first half hour. And I hope they don't kill Torbjörn.
Feel better quick! (But maybe don't tell work right away that you feel better.)
posted by Don Pepino at 1:27 PM on October 16, 2023 [3 favorites]
Technically the meeting was on Zoom, so none of us will die as a direct result of it, but I mightily resent the workplace, anyway, for trying to kill me All the God Damn Time by raising my cortisol to lethal levels. I just hope when this workday is finally over and I can return to this movie's welcoming and generous embrace that it fulfills the glorious promises it made to me in its first half hour. And I hope they don't kill Torbjörn.
Feel better quick! (But maybe don't tell work right away that you feel better.)
posted by Don Pepino at 1:27 PM on October 16, 2023 [3 favorites]
Oh man - get better, ODS. I got COVID two weeks ago and I know I got it from work because 1) they're making us physically come into the office now for the all-important "team building" concept, and 2) I don't go anywhere else. The difficulty in merely finding who to report it to at work (so they could add it to their also-hidden "contact tracing" list) exhausted me.
I think I need to watch this movie immediately.
posted by queensissy at 3:02 PM on October 17, 2023 [2 favorites]
I think I need to watch this movie immediately.
posted by queensissy at 3:02 PM on October 17, 2023 [2 favorites]
I had COVID last month. I didn't catch it at work but we think my boyfriend who gave it to me probably picked it up at his workplace. Either that or our mutual friend gave it to both of us, having picked it up, of course, at her workplace.
Please note: The Conference is a bloodbath, so if you don't like horrific gore, skip it or watch through fingers. It also had the "I'll just hang out for a few long moments staring at this clear evidence that a rapidly exsanguinating human was dragged into that closet over there, and then I'll tiptoe up to the closet and verrrrry slowly and quietly open the do- [SCHLINNNNNG!!!]" kind of decision making on the part of several characters. And unlikely coincidences, ridonk obvious red herrings, beyond-human powers suddenly manifesting in improbable people--a generous mix of lazy horror tropes, IOW. Other than those few minor issues, I really can't fault it and was pleased to find that it was everything I hoped. It was frequently hilarious, the pacing was great, and Sweden is just lovely.
posted by Don Pepino at 3:52 PM on October 17, 2023 [4 favorites]
Please note: The Conference is a bloodbath, so if you don't like horrific gore, skip it or watch through fingers. It also had the "I'll just hang out for a few long moments staring at this clear evidence that a rapidly exsanguinating human was dragged into that closet over there, and then I'll tiptoe up to the closet and verrrrry slowly and quietly open the do- [SCHLINNNNNG!!!]" kind of decision making on the part of several characters. And unlikely coincidences, ridonk obvious red herrings, beyond-human powers suddenly manifesting in improbable people--a generous mix of lazy horror tropes, IOW. Other than those few minor issues, I really can't fault it and was pleased to find that it was everything I hoped. It was frequently hilarious, the pacing was great, and Sweden is just lovely.
posted by Don Pepino at 3:52 PM on October 17, 2023 [4 favorites]
Thanks for the heads-up re:this being a bloodbath, Don Pepino. Your original post made it sound like something I might enjoy. But, apparently this is something I most definitely would not.
posted by Thorzdad at 8:29 PM on October 17, 2023 [2 favorites]
posted by Thorzdad at 8:29 PM on October 17, 2023 [2 favorites]
I enjoyed it. In the workplace excursion turned slasher subgenre, though, I liked Severance better.
One of the more disturbing aspects in this film for me was the gaslighting of Lina based on my own recent work experiences.
The final gang's confrontations with the killer was a welcome variation on the broader slasher genre.
posted by audi alteram partem at 6:20 PM on October 18, 2023 [1 favorite]
One of the more disturbing aspects in this film for me was the gaslighting of Lina based on my own recent work experiences.
The final gang's confrontations with the killer was a welcome variation on the broader slasher genre.
posted by audi alteram partem at 6:20 PM on October 18, 2023 [1 favorite]
Ooh, I had only heard of the TV show Severance (which I thought was great); the movie looks good! I'm going to check both of these out.
No, I haven't seen The Conference yet because this week has been so annoying that I'm afraid I'm going to take it as a how-to.
posted by queensissy at 12:02 PM on October 19, 2023 [1 favorite]
No, I haven't seen The Conference yet because this week has been so annoying that I'm afraid I'm going to take it as a how-to.
posted by queensissy at 12:02 PM on October 19, 2023 [1 favorite]
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Hang in there, Don Pepino! (Love the tags BTW.)
posted by Orange Dinosaur Slide at 12:39 PM on October 16, 2023 [3 favorites]