Last Man on Earth: Raisinballs and Wedding Bells

March 9, 2015 8:18 AM - Season 1, Episode 3

Phil has to suck it up and marry "the one," as in "the last one in existence." They both try to make the best out of the situation. And then....

Can't believe I'm the one posting this because I didn't even watch the first episode(s) and didn't plan on trying this show. Oh well....

Anyway, Phil has a nightmare about marrying Carol and then they emerge from the church to see tons of people....he wakes up and goes "Oh, thank god, everyone's still dead." Alas, there's still a wedding to go through, and Carol breaks into a Craft Works to do all the decoration and apparently recording the wedding officiant's role ahead of time. Phil's only job is to get the rings, which he flakes out on to burn some wigs. Because that's what a man does for his bachelor party when he's all alone, apparently. Not to mention bonding with his ball heads and saying an awkward farewell to his mannequin ex.

Carol also makes dinner for Phil and his Tyrannosaurus Rex head. Since there's no meat left in the world, she improvises by making raisinballs instead. Which even she can't eat in the end. But by god, they're gonna make raisinballs out of a shitty situation, dammit! I think I'll end up using "raisinballs" as a term from now on. Oh yeah, and they decided that he's now President of the United States because Carol doesn't like public speaking.

Phil is...very unenthusiastic during the ceremony, which upsets Carol and she stomps off to Bedazzle a "No Scrubs" pillow. WHICH I REALLY WANT RIGHT NOW, INCIDENTALLY. Except how can she be all "no scrubs" when literally all that's left is a scrub? Anyway, Phil feels bad after seeing how much she decorated the house and takes her out to break into a jewelry store so she can get ALL the rings. And after the ceremony, they have a great time playing racquetball indoors and playing with the blowtorch and mowing over things and it's actually quite delightful. Oh yeah, and Carol totally beats the shit out of that mannequin while screaming that Phil is off the market.

As for the sex though...well, Carol likes it noisy and Phil likes it church mouse style.

And at the end of the episode, Phil runs a stop sign and ends up hitting a limo...with a hot blonde woman in it. DAMMIT!!!!

posted by jenfullmoon (23 comments total)

Okay, at this point I'm kind of watching it about 50 percent because I want them to just add one more person at the end of every episode.

"What kind of wacky hijinks will eight people get into? Next week on FOX."
posted by Etrigan at 8:21 AM on March 9, 2015 [3 favorites]

I wonder if it'll turn out that Phil, to stay true to the title, is the only man left.
posted by drezdn at 9:12 AM on March 9, 2015 [2 favorites]

Given the title, I was assuming it would be some sort of comedic Y: The Last Man. But I will also accept male guest stars who all end up dying / leaving Earth by the end of the episode.
posted by Gary at 10:28 AM on March 9, 2015 [1 favorite]

Yeah, fantasy land. Maybe in episode 5 there's a woman that pops up who speaks no english, but makes googly eyes at phil and competes for his attention. Then in episode 6, some wise elderly person shows up to guide phil along and clean up after him, as we march toward Big Love.
posted by cashman at 11:03 AM on March 9, 2015

I still can't get past how much Forte looks like Charles Manson in that publicity shot. Wrecks the whole idea for me...
posted by Naberius at 11:09 AM on March 9, 2015

The show will probably never deal with this directly, but it does make me wonder if Carol has thought out what it means to actually repopulate the earth, in terms of rule keeping and breaking social mores. For someone who insists at stopping at stoplights and not parking in the disability spot, the logistics of this are sort of creepy.
posted by SpacemanStix at 12:20 PM on March 9, 2015 [2 favorites]

I wonder if it'll turn out that Phil, to stay true to the title, is the only man left.

You know, in light of my last comment, I wonder if it does end up being a play on this gag where they do meet more women (but never men), and it ends up being a polygamous community. (TV and reality shows with this theme are pretty popular these days). Then there could be intermarriage between families. I'm not saying this is a good plot development, but maybe the one that has the writing on the wall.
posted by SpacemanStix at 12:24 PM on March 9, 2015

Perhaps they could meet up with a busload of schoolchildren, surviving Lord of the Flies style. Phil would still be the last man, but not the last male.
posted by Strange Interlude at 12:34 PM on March 9, 2015 [1 favorite]

"Okay, at this point I'm kind of watching it about 50 percent because I want them to just add one more person at the end of every episode.
"What kind of wacky hijinks will eight people get into? Next week on FOX."

"I wonder if it'll turn out that Phil, to stay true to the title, is the only man left."

I'm pretty sure at this moment that both of those are gonna happen.

I am pretty much cringing at "oh goodie, now the last hot chick ever is here and wants to bang me" plot, but...what do you expect from dudes, after all.
posted by jenfullmoon at 3:52 PM on March 9, 2015

Saw people were discussing the show here and gave it a try...sheesh, the glorification of destructiveness and wastefulness is annoying. And then what the show is doing to Carol, the only good thing on the show, is galling. Now we're supposed to think that what, she nagged/tricked Phil into marriage? See her as unattractive compared to the other woman and sympathize with Phil? Ugh...
posted by travelwithcats at 4:25 PM on March 9, 2015 [2 favorites]

I am pretty much cringing at "oh goodie, now the last hot chick ever is here and wants to bang me" plot, but...what do you expect from dudes, after all.

I expect us dudes to get our fucking shit together. It's so so tired. It's been done to death. Let it go guys. Let it go. From the fans of it to the writers of it to the executives who greenlight it. Do better.
posted by cashman at 5:46 PM on March 9, 2015

As with last week's thread, I'm again going to urge caution about making judgements based on a 10 second preview for next week's episode (my personal theory is that January Jones is going to turn out to be crazy in some way, and her arrival will eventually lead to Phil and Carol bonding more), as I think it's entirely possible this will go somewhere unexpected by the time this season is done. The first 4 episodes of a show aren't always very representative. But if you guys are right, I will be disappointed.

It could go either way, the industry is chock-a-block with well-meaning liberalish dudebros whose media consumption consists of Sorkin, Breaking Bad, and Scorsese movies and who could use a remedial gender studies class.
posted by JauntyFedora at 6:41 PM on March 9, 2015 [1 favorite]

post-coital beans.
I am a simple man.
This made me too happy.

That aside, I do not think this is going to go the way I want it to.
posted by Seamus at 9:48 PM on March 9, 2015

I realize that the creative drive of the show is mostly down to men (primarily Forte and Christopher Miller & Phil Lord, as I understand it), and I don't know if it will affect people's viewing of the level of satire we're dealing with but I should point out that this week's episode was written by a woman.
posted by doctornecessiter at 5:00 AM on March 10, 2015

This episode was lighter on the jokes than the last two. I thought the Phil / Carol bonding was OK, but also fairly phoned in. January Jones is an interesting development, but will making her be a crazy person who serves as a foil for a less crazy Carol be better? I'm guessing no.

I'll probably keep watching it because Gotham is on a baffling mid-season hiatus, and it's decent DVR fodder, but it hasn't grabbed me yet.
posted by codacorolla at 1:43 PM on March 10, 2015

Yeah, they're really testing my patience. The promos made it look like he was ALL ALONE and if it turns out there's another man left, I'm probably done. And whatever they're doing with the women, I'm only loosely on board with so far. Honestly we could have spent all the time in the first 6 episodes with just Phil, traveling around looking for other people.

That said, his bachelor party with his sports balls friends looked like a lotta fun.
posted by dogwalker at 2:31 PM on March 10, 2015

Yeah, they introduced Carol too quickly (probably a network decision to get on with it). Maybe two or three episodes of Phil alone in various places, but it means they'd have to come up with something more than boy-fantasy destroying-shit antics, because that did get old after a few minutes. And I'm not sure they quite know what to do to make that work.

But, I think it's good to introduce the third person rather quickly after the "marriage" and let that simmer before the inevitable next-to-last-man-on-earth appears.
posted by briank at 8:59 AM on March 11, 2015

The promos made it look like he was ALL ALONE and if it turns out there's another man left, I'm probably done.

I mean, we all have our own priorities but to jettison this based on whether it strictly adheres to a show title or preview accuracy? That seems like tossing a book not because of whether it's good or not but because it's noT what you expected from the cover.

Personally I think there's so many other better reasons to stop watching the show. I liked this episode better than the last one but am still pretty underwhelmed. I do think it was interesting to have Phil discover Carol is more fun to have around than he thought, but no so much that we entirely drop the question of whether a world with only one companion is more worth continuing to live in than one with no companions.

Anything that goes into actual logistics rather than just emotional stuff is impossible territory. Then we get into why the gas is still any good and what happens when Phil needs a filling. Or a new liver.
posted by phearlez at 9:31 AM on March 11, 2015

That seems like tossing a book not because of whether it's good or not but because it's noT what you expected from the cover.

Yeah, I have no problem with this scenario. If I asked someone, "Can you recommend a good YA book with a love story?" and they handed me a book that turned out to be a physics textbook with a YA cover, I'd stop reading. Don't care if it's the greatest physics book of all time.
posted by dogwalker at 1:09 PM on March 11, 2015

JauntyFedora: As with last week's thread, I'm again going to urge caution about making judgements based on a 10 second preview for next week's episode (my personal theory is that January Jones is going to turn out to be crazy in some way, and her arrival will eventually lead to Phil and Carol bonding more)

I'm hoping January Jones is actually talking about being attracted to Carol when she says "I'm so horny," because this show is too white and straight to be interesting (to me) for too long, and I really worry that the One Man, Many Ladies fantasy with complications will be what we'll get instead.
posted by filthy light thief at 9:39 AM on March 13, 2015 [1 favorite]

I'm pretty much a sucker for post-apocalyptic anything, so I'll be sticking this out to see how it goes.

I do wish there had been more time of Phil trying to figure out what's up before discovering other people. I think the psychological question of loneliness is an interesting thing to explore, and I find that I enjoy the parts that ring somewhat true to that question. I think there's room for a really serious show somewhere that addresses just that question.
posted by SpacemanStix at 9:45 AM on March 13, 2015 [1 favorite]

Or a miniseries. I can envision a really awesome four-part series where someone literally is the last person on earth in a post-apocalyptic scenario, and it's primarily how they deal with that psychologically, but then also the survival aspect to it. It should start when the person is about 35, and end with them dying of old age, not some kind of accident. The idea being that the person learns how to survive, both physically and psychologically, and you go on this journey with them. It would also include all the accompanying horrors, like bodies actually being there when everyone dies.
posted by SpacemanStix at 11:12 AM on March 13, 2015

I'm kinda surprised by the amount of dislike FanFare has for this, bordering on hate-watching.

I would definitely prefer the show to be a little better with its gender roles stuff, but I still think it's really good. Are y'all not into the jokes?
posted by tjgrathwell at 1:30 PM on March 13, 2015 [2 favorites]