Top Chef: Big Gay Wedding
January 9, 2016 9:06 AM - Season 13, Episode 5 - Subscribe

The chefs make "date" dishes for the quickfire, and cater a wedding for 25 gay couples (officiated by Padma!) for the elimination challenge. The inimitable Art Smith shows up to renew his vows and serve as guest judge.
posted by duffell (18 comments total)
 
Art Smith is looking a bit more rotund than usual.
posted by smackfu at 9:21 AM on January 9, 2016


  • Art is the sweetest man on earth. I don't care for talk shows, but I would watch the shit out of "Being an Adorable Southern Culinary Genius with Art Smith."
  • Phillip: "It's a wedding. I wanted to make steak and potatoes." Um. I'm really not sure what these statements have to do with each other.
  • I've never had good dirty rice, but as a beloved TV show once said, I WANT TO BELIEVE. Any recommendations for good DC-area dirty rice, fellow MeFites?
  • Somebody said "I really miss Grayson" at the start of the episode. ok.
  • All in all, I think this season boasts a remarkably strong "top tier" of chefs. It's hard for me to identify a front-runner; there are 5 or 6 great chefs I could easily see take home the title this season.
  • With Grayson (and now Giselle) gone from the competition, is Phillip the uncontested whiner-in-chief?

posted by duffell at 9:26 AM on January 9, 2016


It's weird that Phillip seems to keep making very questionable menu decisions, given that he has a pretty successful restaurant career as a head chef. Like he says a dish is a favorite at his restaurant, then makes it and it falls flat. Unlike the Cajun guy who does the same but everyone loves it.
posted by smackfu at 9:29 AM on January 9, 2016 [1 favorite]


It's weird that Phillip seems to keep making very questionable menu decisions, given that he has a pretty successful restaurant career as a head chef. Like he says a dish is a favorite at his restaurant, then makes it and it falls flat.

It's true! This is at least the second time he's promised to deliver with something from his restaurant and failed. I like to imagine he has a couple of amazing sous chefs (or kitchen elves) who follow behind him and fix everything he touches.

Would not have minded a Giselle/Phillip double elimination. Also, I know every year they say it's "the best group of chefs" they've ever had, but I honestly think this is the best-quality food they've had in early episodes, so I'm excited for the season.
posted by CatastropheWaitress at 9:46 AM on January 9, 2016


Boy, Phillip is really disliked by the other contestants. Everyone was willing to sell him out. All that braggadocio has taken its toll.

I still don't mind him though. I think he's kinda fun and high-spirited and I look forward to seeing what he's going to make, even when it fails. This season seems to have a remarkably strong group of chefs, but it's being brought down by a few of the weaker contenders who, out of frustration, are becoming "I'm not here to make friends" reality-show asses. They're getting weeded out, thankfully. Once Angelina goes, we will have an unusually talented bunch, and hopefully fewer feuds. (But maybe some of the others will become prickly reality-show personalities once the competition heats up. Jason seems to be succumbing to the stress.)

I really want Kwame to win. He seems too young to actually take it all the way, but he's such a great guy that I'm stumping for him.
posted by painquale at 10:10 AM on January 10, 2016 [1 favorite]


This is at least the second time he's promised to deliver with something from his restaurant and failed.

This is what boggles my mind about Phillip. Usually when chefs crib from their restaurant menu, the danger is that they'll get dinged for playing it safe. For Phillip, though, we've twice had him make a surefire recipe from his restaurant that nobody likes in the least. His judge's table rebuttal this episode was basically, "it tasted bad to you in precisely the way I'd meant it to". So ... mission accomplished, I guess?

I dunno, maybe his restaurant just somehow has found a really niche crowd that's into what he is, because whatever it is doesn't seem to be what the judges want.

(Also, seriously, potato + blender? Is there any scenario where that doesn't become a glue-like mess? The moment he stated his intentions I was like "... wait, what the fuck?", because this is like a kitchen basics 101 thing you should never, ever do.)

Somebody said "I really miss Grayson" at the start of the episode. ok.

OK this may have been even more baffling that Phillip. This was like, spit-take material when it was uttered.
posted by tocts at 5:50 PM on January 10, 2016 [1 favorite]


Kwame's personality is really enjoyable and his food seems consistently on point. Plus he doesn't cave when saddled with half-baked ideas. I hope he stays for a while.
posted by tofu_crouton at 5:52 AM on January 11, 2016 [1 favorite]


Wesley meanwhile: "yoga is for hippies hurdurdur" then later the same day "I should try being more open-minded."

Btw, did Kwame and Wesley make their own fish sauce? I guess I never thought of that as an ingredient you make. It just magically appears in supermarkets!
posted by tofu_crouton at 5:55 AM on January 11, 2016


Traditional Asian fish sauce generally is fermented fish which gives it the flavor intensity, so I don't think it's something you can easily make.
posted by smackfu at 6:41 AM on January 11, 2016 [1 favorite]


I really thought the producers were setting up Kwame's eventual loss here. Usually when people try to craft half remembered ideas from travel it doesn't go super great, so I was happy my expectations were incorrect!
posted by Carillon at 9:18 AM on January 11, 2016


Yeah the talent this season is fucking unreal. And way to go not just Kwame, but nailing that dessert---unusual on TC.

The next two to go are going to be Angelina and Phillip, unless he's being set up for a big win. Two more episodes to Restaurant Wars...
posted by feckless fecal fear mongering at 2:03 PM on January 11, 2016


If Phillip wins big I am not sure I will be able to take it. Just . . . mashed potato glue. Ugh. Why would you commit such a horrible crime against the wonderment that is potatoes?!?!?!?!
posted by chainsofreedom at 2:45 PM on January 12, 2016 [1 favorite]


If Phillip wins big I am not sure I will be able to take it.

I still love this show, but honestly, I feel like any kind of nonsense is possible after Nick won over Nina in Season 11.
posted by duffell at 2:53 PM on January 12, 2016


Literally everything Phillip has done has been a disaster. His only saving grace has been that other people have been a shade worse. He failed at vegetables in a vegetable garden doing a dish from his restaurant. He served warm snot on rocks. And then the potatoes wtf, why would you even.

Dude. If you want to be all modernist chef, you must have the chops to back it up. And part of that means knowing you don't do that to potatoes because you get glue! If you want to make a potato foam you basically have to make a potato stock and go from there. The other part of that means you have to be honest and self-aware enough to realize when someone else is saying "dude that's getting gluey," listen.
posted by feckless fecal fear mongering at 4:19 PM on January 12, 2016 [1 favorite]


I'm not sure if I'm really happy there's no fanfare for the Nick bullshit because I'd reread that a bunch and get grumpy, or if I'm sad because I'd love to hear what my fellow mefites had to say about it.
posted by Carillon at 4:28 PM on January 12, 2016 [1 favorite]


I missed out on S11. Gonna rectify that now.
posted by feckless fecal fear mongering at 7:27 PM on January 12, 2016


Prepare to want to throw things at your TV!

Also I discovered this week that Hulu has every season available for streaming. I've been rewatching from the beginning and it's amazing how much has changed. I watched them all when they aired but I haven't seen them since. Season 1 was so fun and lighthearted and cheap looking! They cooked for a party at Mr. S! They made a ton of cheesy double entendres! They repeatedly said "tit". I loved it.
posted by primalux at 10:36 PM on January 12, 2016


Ugh. I was even forgetting the snot on a rock.


SNOT ON A ROCK.
posted by chainsofreedom at 1:29 PM on January 13, 2016


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