All Elite Wrestling: Dynamite: January 24, 2024

January 24, 2024 4:53 PM - Season 5, Episode 17

“It is a truth universally acknowledged, that a trio of beef boys having lost possession of a title, must be in want of a new title.” Tonight on Dynamite, the Gates Of Agony will try to soothe the pain of losing the ROH trios titles by challenging for the AEW set. Also Thunder Rosa and Wardlow will look to add some notches to their recent singles histories and Adam Copeland will be chopped to death by a Crazy Japanese Murder Grandpa.

I'm going to try something a little different this time, instead of waiting for the Wrestling Observer post-match I'll put up this up before the show and sprinkle stuff in later, hoping others may join in.

Tonight's announced card for Dynamite:

* AEW Trios Championship: The Acclaimed & Billy Gunn (c) vs. The Mogul Embassy
* Adam Copeland vs. Minoru Suzuki
* Penta El Zero Miedo vs. Hangman Adam Page
* Jeff Hardy vs. Swerve Strickland
* Wardlow vs. Trent Beretta
* Thunder Rosa vs. Red Velvet
* Face-to-face interview with Toni Storm & Deonna Purrazzo
* We’ll hear from Sting & Darby Allin

posted by The Pluto Gangsta (12 comments total)

LOL at Samoa Joe asking who raised Hook with bad manners, with Taz sitting five feet away.
posted by The Pluto Gangsta at 5:09 PM on January 24

Hangman Adam Page defeated Penta El Zero Miedo (w/Alex Abrahantes)

"I really enjoyed the finishing sequence of this one, as it took Page a lot to finally put Penta away. I would’ve been shocked had Page lost here, who really stared Joe down multiple times, as it’s very likely that we’re getting a Triple Threat for the AEW Title with Joe, Page & Swerve Strickland. I did like the HOOK & Joe interaction to start the show, but they need to make sure HOOK does something before getting another World Title match, he can’t be doing nothing up until then."

I would have said these two were operating on about 2/3rds speed for the first part of the match, followed by a big-hitting spotfest where guys kick out of each other's finishers. Does Page have anything that can put someone down other than the Buckshot?
posted by The Pluto Gangsta at 5:48 PM on January 24

Oh wow whoever planned out this Toni Storm/Deonna Purazzo sit-down is a genius. Purrazzo stood in juuuuust the right space on the ramp to have her head haloed by her light show, and then we get a half-B&W screenshot? ::chefskiss::
posted by The Pluto Gangsta at 5:52 PM on January 24

Wardlow (w/Adam Cole, Roderick Strong, Matt Taven & Mike Bennett) defeated Trent Beretta (w/Chuck Taylor, Orange Cassidy & Rocky Romero)

"Post match, Wardlow went to inflict more damage, but was called off by Adam Cole and company, as Beretta shoved Cassidy away from helping him up, frustrated at what just happened. Beretta ultimately cooled down and apologized to Cassidy. [...] This was the most offense we’ve seen anyone get on Wardlow in months, so credit to Beretta, who showed off some aggression post match. Perhaps they’re planting seeds for Beretta to break off from Best Friends?"

Here's the thing, I don't believe that Orange Cassidy takes Roddy Strong's threat for the International Championship seriously. Mostly because Undisputed Kingdom aren't presenting themselves like a serious threat. Adam Cole should borrow Britt Baker's wheelchair from the pandemic times and come in like Prof. X with a shit-eating grin and direct his boys to wreck everyone. Otherwise why would I believe they're so threatening that Bullet Club Gold and The Acclaimed have joined forces?
posted by The Pluto Gangsta at 6:30 PM on January 24

Swerve Strickland (w/Prince Nana) defeated Jeff Hardy (w/Matt Hardy)

Jeff Hardy getting in a surprising amount of crisp offense in this match, while Matt stayed on the side in a polo like a fellow on his way to work at Radio Shack. I know that Swerve and/or Hangman vs. Samoa Joe is the money match, but for just a moment imagine a resurgence of 2012-era TNA if Jeff Hardy faced Samoa Joe for a championship in 2024...
posted by The Pluto Gangsta at 6:51 PM on January 24

Thunder Rosa defeated Red Velvet

"This not only suffered from most of it happening during commercial, but when things returned, it felt very clunky, especially the finish. [...] Rosa battled back during break and continued to run wild with double knees in the corner. Rosa followed with the charging low dropkick and Northern Lights for two. Velvet fought back with a series of strikes and cazadora into a double stomp. A running double knees in the ropes led to Velvet trying a springing bulldog, but Rosa avoided, took way too long to try her finisher, allowing Velvet to back drop out. Rosa rolled through; hit a shotgun dropkick and Tijuana Bomb for the win.

Post match, Rosa looked into the camera and said “when is my time Toni Storm or…” and she couldn’t remember Julia Hart’s name and asked the camera man what her name was. I don’t know if that was intentional or not, it was odd regardless. The camera cut away to the Savannah Bananas baseball team sitting ringside before she could continue."

Whether or not AEW manages to sign Mercedes Moné or Giulia, my fantasy booking is that Tony Khan just looks at the current moves of WWE and thinks "You know, what if I just do all the things that WWE isn't doing, and beat them to the punch, because I can?" and then decides he's going to book an all-womens PPV special.
posted by The Pluto Gangsta at 7:05 PM on January 24

AEW Six-Man Championship Match: The Acclaimed (Anthony Bowens & Max Caster) & Daddy Ass (c) defeated Mogul Embassy (Brian Cage, Toa Liona & Bishop Kaun w/Prince Nana)

Now see, Gates of Agony/Mogul Embassy actually do seem like a threatening faction, so it's more logical for Acclaimed and Bullet Club to have united in fear of them, rather than Undisputed Kingdom.

Hmm... Juice Robinson goes out on injury and suddenly the rest of his team turn face. Was he the Sith all along?
posted by The Pluto Gangsta at 7:24 PM on January 24

Adam Copeland defeated Minoru Suzuki

"I can safely say no one saw this match coming a week ago, but I’m sure glad we got it, this was excellent. The no commercial breaks during the main event really help as well, as there doesn’t feel like any down time, making the match have more urgency. When Copeland said he’s never been hit as hard as this, I absolutely believe him, as Suzuki was beating the living hell out of him. Copeland hung tough and survived a really fun main event."

Best part is when Suzuki sat up behind Copeland just the same way Undertaker used to, but since he's a smaller man he was kinda hidden until the camera cut to a new angle, and he actually wriggled on the mat to get behind Copeland and surprise him with the naked choke.
posted by The Pluto Gangsta at 7:31 PM on January 24

Hmm... Juice Robinson goes out on injury and suddenly the rest of his team turn face. Was he the Sith all along?

Unquestionably. He's from Joliet, fer chrissake

Non-Wrestling Highlights:
-Hook bat-signal
-OC to Renee: "Did you see Wardlow? He's ... big."
-"I will twist your lips so hard you will need an epidural"
-MATCHING TATTOOS
-Pretty sure Minoru Suzuki is the last thing you see before you die

Thoughts and Questions:
-What is it going to take to get a real banger out of Thunder Rosa? We know she's got it in her after that first Britt match.
-Where the fuck is Danhausen
-Is anyone else still kind of not okay after Okada's NJPW departure? I'm not okay!
posted by We put our faith in Blast Hardcheese at 9:59 PM on January 24 [1 favorite]

My prediction is that WWE will spend this new Netflix money on getting Sasha/Mercedes back -- because Hunter wants all his NXT kids back -- and sign Okada with the leftover, where he'll either put on classics or wrestle once a month and then go surfing with his buddy Nakamura.

If Okada isn't a surprise entrant at the Rumble, then lets book Danhausen vs. Okada headlines for All In 2024.
posted by The Pluto Gangsta at 4:50 PM on January 25 [1 favorite]

What is it going to take to get a real banger out of Thunder Rosa?

I have a sad feeling that Rosa's attention is focused more on getting Mission Pro Wrestling off the ground, and she's basically going to finish her contract with AEW on good terms, but without a major push again.
posted by The Pluto Gangsta at 6:55 PM on January 25

I heard someone here was asking about Okada?
posted by The Pluto Gangsta at 9:48 PM on January 25