FanFare

After their deep-space freighter is damaged, the stranded crew of the Demeter must fight to survive on a beautiful yet dangerous planet. (series trailer)
posted by gwint on Nov 3, 2023 - 20 comments

"A visual science fiction experience that will boggle your mind." "SPACE VISION a step beyond 3-D" This is one of those movies that makes nonsensical and arbitrary things happen, but tries to excuse it by passing them off as mysterious. Well duh, anything's a mystery if there's no possible explanation for it! A plane with three people (one of the a pregnant woman) is downed by a storm, but ends up inside a huge hollow chamber with invisible walls, in which live zombie-like people who go through the motions of their lives. Like The Mask, this was made for 3D, so there's a bunch of in-your-face effects. Unlike that film though, only the 2D version is riffed on here. Joel riffs this one! The subplot has Jonah, Emily and Joel planning their escape, through the gimmick that the Mads, for some reason, can't hear anything spoken in rhyme. I like the episode, but the movie basically just toys with its characters throughout, until the unexpectedly happy ending. Premiered November 11, 2022, in the Gizmoplex. [more inside]
posted by JHarris on Jul 27, 2023 - 0 comments

Rewatch! In space, things happen. There's a plague and Jack Palance is evil, and at one point his holographic head is gigantic and rotating over the landscape of an alien planet, and there's a really annoying robot that can teleport wherever it wants it seems. H.G. Wells fans, well, won't actually have much to enjoy here, the movie's kind of dull and doesn't really have much to do with his writing. The movie's a mess. Previously.
posted by JHarris on Jul 13, 2023 - 4 comments

Rewatch! Not The Wild Wild World Of, this is just The Batwoman. In fact, The Mexican The Batwoman. She follows the natural career upgrade path south of the border, from luchador to superhero. Her mission is to stop a mad scientist from creating a race of fish people. Bats and fish: natural enemies. Previously.
posted by JHarris on Jun 29, 2023 - 1 comment

Rewatch! One of a dwindling number to go at this point. It's one of those sci-fi movies whose grand vision of the future is largely today but like with multinational consortiums and giant robots. There's even a major location that's just a normal town circa the movie's making, passed off as a preserved ghost town and tourist location. Warning, there's an appallingly misogynistic character who's intended by the movie to be seen as a lovable scamp. Feh, meh, pleh, bleah. Previously. [more inside]
posted by JHarris on May 17, 2023 - 0 comments

Rewatch! Some things happen, or do they? One of the most nonsensical movies in Mystery Science Theater 3000's ancient pantheon of nonsense. As oneswellfoop wrote, "It's like all the temporal paradoxes over the entire run of Doctor Who, Quantum Leap, DC's Legends of Tomorrow, Irwin Allen's Time Tunnel, the Back to the Future movies and the episode of Babylon 5 where Babylon 4 reappeared all converged on one isolated location and didn't have clue what to do next so they ordered pizza." The episode has the return of J. Elvis Weinstein as Dr. Erhardt! Previously.
posted by JHarris on Apr 20, 2023 - 1 comment

Rewatch! People find a hyperintelligent lifeform in the ocean, and it's turning people into blobs! The opinions from MeFites the last time this one came up ran the gamut. Some were happy that it was a genuinely bad movie instead of a knockoff like 1201 and 2; someone mention that is a knockoff, of The Abyss; some liked it; some found it DULL. There's a fun during-movie song in this one, with a psychedelic tone.Previously.
posted by JHarris on Apr 13, 2023 - 1 comment

Rewatch! The Asylum is an infamous studio I'm a bit conflicted about. It's true, I've seen a lot of their films, despite finding it challenging to make it through a lot of them. Many of them aren't what I'd call good. But they continue to make movie after movie, even after all this time, despite it being a difficult craft, doggedly doing what they want no matter what people tell them. I admire that. And they made Z Nation, which people generally liked. Well, this is more typical of their output: a movie based loosely upon, and named similarly to, a big-budget movie, released straight to disk. This one has pretty unlikable characters. It's the second movie of "The Gauntlet," MST3K's short 12th season. Previously.
posted by JHarris on Apr 6, 2023 - 1 comment

Rewatch! A disturbingly malleable, bubble-gum-like alien and their family get stuck on Earth and befriend a wheelchair-riding boy in this notable box-office failure. Chris Pratt seems to like it though! Season 12 ties Season 7 for the shortest season of MST3K. This is the first episode of "The Gauntlet," a series of MST3K episodes designed to be binged, although that'd be over nine hours of riffed film, so good luch surviving that. Unlike the previous episodes, I only posted each MST3K episode from Season 12 once, so less of a retread this time! Previously.
posted by JHarris on Mar 30, 2023 - 8 comments

Re-rewatch! Once again, it's the last episode of Season 11, the first Netflix season. People go to the center of Edgar Rice Burroughs Earth and meet dinos and cavefolk. It's Growler's first episode, and the episode of Kinga's ratings-stunt marriage that never ends up happening. It ends on a kind of cliffhanger, but Jonah's okay, he's outside the SOL in a space suit. Previously and again.
posted by JHarris on Mar 23, 2023 - 1 comment

Re-rewatch! A German U-boat sings a passenger vessel, but rescues survivors. The strife between the two groups is set aside when they find a land peopled by prehistoric people and dinosaurs. Previously and again
posted by JHarris on Feb 2, 2023 - 1 comment

Re-re-rewatch! (what, really?) Stella Star is a star rogue kind of lady, whose second-in-command and guy-pal Akton also seems to have weird space powers. Anyway, they're on the run from the Space Law, until the Emperor of the Universe wants them to track down his lost son amidst the "Haunted Stars." If this seems awfully random, trust me, it's only the beginning. By the end there's amazons with a giant lady robot with metal breasts, a Texan-speaking law robot, the evil Count Zarth Arn, and much much more. A legendary ridiculous movie, and prime fodder for Jonah and a pair of wisecracking robots. Previously, again, and one more time. [more inside]
posted by JHarris on Jan 26, 2023 - 5 comments

Re-rewatch! Continuing with the first streaming season, some scientists are trapped in the future because of Danny. Thanks, Danny. Previously and again.
posted by JHarris on Dec 15, 2022 - 1 comment

"Beyond the earth... beyond the moon... beyond your wildest imagination!" It's the future in space, and there's a plague, and important drugs are being brought from a distant planet, and Jack Palance is trying to take over the universe, and there's a teleporting robot, and some kids in one scene. I couldn't make heads or tails of this one folks. There's a plot synopsis on Wikipedia, read that. It's another movie that tried to cash in on Star Wars' gigantic success. It's not nearly as campy as Starcrash, but that makes it very bland as a film. Even with Jack Palance as the villain, he's simply not in enough scenes to make it memorable. Other than sharing some character names and being set in the future, this movie has almost nothing to do with H.G. Wells' novel. Premiered October 7, 2022, in the Gizmoplex. [more inside]
posted by JHarris on Oct 15, 2022 - 1 comment

Re-rewatch! Stella Starr and her platonic space wizard friend Akton are on the run from the space police, until they aren't, given a reprieve if they go find Space Emperor Christopher Plummer's son, David Hasselhoff. Along the way they meet a robot with a Texas accent, space amazons and their giant lady robot guardian, stop motion androids, a frozen planet, a traitorous crewman, space cavemen, trooper-carrying space torpedoes, and the evil Count Zarth Arn. An imfamously silly movie, but still fun, there's always something going on. Previously - Also previously [more inside]
posted by JHarris on Feb 5, 2020 - 9 comments

"The World Became a Living Hell... When Past, Present and Future Collided...." It certainly did. I'm not even sure what's going on here. Some supernovas happen, and then a family sensibly living in the middle of the desert have crazy encounters with aliens, there's some kind of time-space shenanigans, and by the end you're not sure if they're all in the afterlife or on a journey to an alien city. Solar power may have had something to do with it. Kicking off the second half of (Kinga hand gesture) The Gauntlet, this may be the most challenging film of the sextet. The highlight is a surprise host segment visit from an old friend who, after over 200 episodes, is no longer "missing".... [more inside]
posted by JHarris on Jan 2, 2019 - 25 comments

"The ultimate underwater adventure!" Under de sea... there's scary psychic stingray monsters that control people and turn them into goo! But hey, everything's better where it is wetter, right? Not a film to show to marine biology students. It's episode three of "The Gauntlet," and a weird movie. The SOL has issues with psychic sea monsters and Kinga and Max stage a morning talk show. For fun! Episode 1203 is available on Netflix. [more inside]
posted by JHarris on Dec 12, 2018 - 16 comments

In a world that we are assured bears no relationship with anything created by Guillermo Del Toro, three pilots of experimental, implausibly humanoid giant robots fight against monsters from the ocean. Where do the monsters come from and why are they attacking now? Who knows! What's more important is that our heroes, Black Guy, Woman and Obnoxious Bro, fight the monsters to both the stern disapproval and enthusiastic approval of General Father Figure. At last the crew of the Satellite of Love come up against the fearsome work of The Asylum, makers of mockbusters extraordure. In subplot news, this is the second of the six movies of "The Gauntlet," Kinga's latest ratings stunt, a sequence of films shown to Jonah and the bots back-to-back. They hold up well, even though the movie is exceptionally tiresome. "Flush them the movie!" Episode 1202 is available on Netflix. [more inside]
posted by JHarris on Dec 5, 2018 - 28 comments

A wheelchair-bound kid befriends an alien, and then careens off a cliff, goes to McDonalds, gets shot up by NASA, and witnesses the alien and his family become US citizens. MST is back baby, and off to a great start for the shortened Season 12! The premise is that, while you're free to watch the episodes whenever you want, Jonah and the 'bots are supposed subjected to these six movies back-to-back! The riffing and sketches are great in this one (yes, I started watching it within minutes of it premiering on Netflix). Episode 1201 can be seen on Netflix. First aired today, November 22, 2018. [more inside]
posted by JHarris on Nov 22, 2018 - 35 comments