Game of Thrones: Home Show Only
May 1, 2016 6:57 PM - Season 6, Episode 2 - Subscribe
Bran trains with the Three-Eyed Raven. Jaime advises Tommen. Tyrion demands good news but has to make his own. The Night's Watch stands behind Thorne. Ramsay Bolton proposes a plan. Balon Greyjoy entertains other proposals.
Directed by Jeremy Podeswa
Written by Dave Hill
Full cast and crew credits
SHOW ONLY THREAD. If someone wants to discuss the books in relation to this episode, they're welcome to make a separate post.
NYT: Isaac Hempstead-Wright on ‘Game of Thrones,’ Bran Stark’s Return and Hodor
Vanity Fair: Who Is the Three-Eyed Raven?
Directed by Jeremy Podeswa
Written by Dave Hill
Full cast and crew credits
SHOW ONLY THREAD. If someone wants to discuss the books in relation to this episode, they're welcome to make a separate post.
NYT: Isaac Hempstead-Wright on ‘Game of Thrones,’ Bran Stark’s Return and Hodor
Vanity Fair: Who Is the Three-Eyed Raven?
Hey guys did you know that Ramsay is like really evil? Just checking in case you forgot.
posted by gatorae at 6:59 PM on May 1, 2016 [16 favorites]
posted by gatorae at 6:59 PM on May 1, 2016 [16 favorites]
OH MY GOD A COMPLETELY SHOCKING AND UNEXPECTED TWIST AT THE END.
NOT AT ALL TOTALLY PREDICTABLE THINGS HAPPENED.
I am looking forward to Tyrion, the Dragon Tamer, however.
posted by dis_integration at 7:01 PM on May 1, 2016 [1 favorite]
NOT AT ALL TOTALLY PREDICTABLE THINGS HAPPENED.
I am looking forward to Tyrion, the Dragon Tamer, however.
posted by dis_integration at 7:01 PM on May 1, 2016 [1 favorite]
I AM WAITING FOR WILLIS-HODOR'S BACKSTORY!
I really liked our return to the Iron Isles and the confirmation that every single major family/kingdom is now facing thorny dynastic issues, but Theon's sister looked so different I found it incredibly distracting.
posted by TwoStride at 7:02 PM on May 1, 2016 [5 favorites]
I really liked our return to the Iron Isles and the confirmation that every single major family/kingdom is now facing thorny dynastic issues, but Theon's sister looked so different I found it incredibly distracting.
posted by TwoStride at 7:02 PM on May 1, 2016 [5 favorites]
You knew something, Onion Knight.
And finally that last leech paid off. Better late then never, eh, Fire God?
posted by rewil at 7:02 PM on May 1, 2016 [4 favorites]
And finally that last leech paid off. Better late then never, eh, Fire God?
posted by rewil at 7:02 PM on May 1, 2016 [4 favorites]
I am so deeply charmed by the idea of little Tyrion-sized dragon kitties, and want some BADLY.
posted by joyceanmachine at 7:03 PM on May 1, 2016 [12 favorites]
posted by joyceanmachine at 7:03 PM on May 1, 2016 [12 favorites]
Also, in honor of those who complained mightly last week about the poor fight scenes the show choreographs, I totally guffawed out loud when the Night's Watch Traitors dropped their weapons after... 1 arrow/bolt.
posted by TwoStride at 7:04 PM on May 1, 2016
posted by TwoStride at 7:04 PM on May 1, 2016
Also, the Red Woman is clearly going to go into her retirement business as a hairdresser.
posted by TwoStride at 7:04 PM on May 1, 2016
posted by TwoStride at 7:04 PM on May 1, 2016
Bran looks like he payin' taxes and complaining about traffic.
posted by Justinian at 7:05 PM on May 1, 2016 [5 favorites]
posted by Justinian at 7:05 PM on May 1, 2016 [5 favorites]
RIP Roose, the single competent actor and interesting character in that subplot.
posted by codacorolla at 7:05 PM on May 1, 2016 [21 favorites]
posted by codacorolla at 7:05 PM on May 1, 2016 [21 favorites]
Bah, on a long enough timeline I could work magic to kill all your enemies. It just might take some decades. Mel can't take all the credit.
posted by Justinian at 7:06 PM on May 1, 2016 [2 favorites]
posted by Justinian at 7:06 PM on May 1, 2016 [2 favorites]
Roose: worst undead ice vampire ever
posted by leotrotsky at 7:07 PM on May 1, 2016
posted by leotrotsky at 7:07 PM on May 1, 2016
Oh and I straight-out cackled when Ser Frankenmountain cracked that dude's head on the wall.
posted by rewil at 7:08 PM on May 1, 2016 [15 favorites]
posted by rewil at 7:08 PM on May 1, 2016 [15 favorites]
Ramsey really needed a bigger dagger there. Like, sure, Roose probably would've died eventually, but he would have been at least been able to struggle with that tiny thing entering his gut.
posted by drezdn at 7:09 PM on May 1, 2016
posted by drezdn at 7:09 PM on May 1, 2016
So Jon + Sansa gonna lead a wildling army to open a can of woop-ass on Ramsay. Good.
posted by Justinian at 7:12 PM on May 1, 2016 [1 favorite]
posted by Justinian at 7:12 PM on May 1, 2016 [1 favorite]
Sigh. And to think I expected Ramsay to just throw his new baby brother over the walls. But I guess that wouldn't have been eeeeevil enough.
posted by TwoStride at 7:12 PM on May 1, 2016 [1 favorite]
posted by TwoStride at 7:12 PM on May 1, 2016 [1 favorite]
I'm not sure guys I hate to diagnose people but I think there might be something not quite right in the head with this Ramsay chap.
posted by Justinian at 7:15 PM on May 1, 2016 [8 favorites]
posted by Justinian at 7:15 PM on May 1, 2016 [8 favorites]
Random thoughts:
Tyrion, friend of two dragons!
Let's get Tryion drunk more often!
Roose, dear Roose, should have seen that coming.
The palace guard sighing in relief at not having to face Ser Robert Strong was hilarious.
Tommen is weak. Cersei is strong and believes that all her children will die. I betting she'll sacrifice in some way.
Ramsay faces Daenerys problem: He can conquer, but can't govern.
The return of Jon: Well played and well done. Didn't bring him right back and Melissandre looked like she felt something at first, then lost it.
Wun Wun breaking down the door was awesome. Perhaps Ed will be the new Lord Commander, with the Wildings backing him?
Hodur, er, Willis, the stableboy. Talking and everything! Probably struck in the head by a horse later on.
Very nice to see strong women being strong, from Yara on the Iron Islands to Lyanna Stark, Especially the latter, she carried herself very well.
Interesting that Brienne searched three days for Arya, but no mention was made of finding the Hound's body. HMMMMMMMM.
Nice call back with the Karstarks joining the Boltons.
Overall, another good episode
posted by Brandon Blatcher at 7:16 PM on May 1, 2016 [3 favorites]
Tyrion, friend of two dragons!
Let's get Tryion drunk more often!
Roose, dear Roose, should have seen that coming.
The palace guard sighing in relief at not having to face Ser Robert Strong was hilarious.
Tommen is weak. Cersei is strong and believes that all her children will die. I betting she'll sacrifice in some way.
Ramsay faces Daenerys problem: He can conquer, but can't govern.
The return of Jon: Well played and well done. Didn't bring him right back and Melissandre looked like she felt something at first, then lost it.
Wun Wun breaking down the door was awesome. Perhaps Ed will be the new Lord Commander, with the Wildings backing him?
Hodur, er, Willis, the stableboy. Talking and everything! Probably struck in the head by a horse later on.
Very nice to see strong women being strong, from Yara on the Iron Islands to Lyanna Stark, Especially the latter, she carried herself very well.
Interesting that Brienne searched three days for Arya, but no mention was made of finding the Hound's body. HMMMMMMMM.
Nice call back with the Karstarks joining the Boltons.
Overall, another good episode
posted by Brandon Blatcher at 7:16 PM on May 1, 2016 [3 favorites]
And the Manderlys and Umbers. I'm sure they are very loyal.
posted by Justinian at 7:18 PM on May 1, 2016 [2 favorites]
posted by Justinian at 7:18 PM on May 1, 2016 [2 favorites]
Game of Thrones: Kit Harington breaks his silence -- Exclusive Entertainment Weekly.
posted by Brandon Blatcher at 7:19 PM on May 1, 2016
posted by Brandon Blatcher at 7:19 PM on May 1, 2016
Well played and well done. Didn't bring him right back and Melissandre looked like she felt something at first, then lost it.
More like cliched and overwrought, with manipulative pauses, and deus-ex-machina Wildlings invasion. Better to have brought him back at the end of last episode, instead of gratuitous tits+naked grandma, so he could feed Thorne to Ghost.
posted by dis_integration at 7:19 PM on May 1, 2016 [6 favorites]
More like cliched and overwrought, with manipulative pauses, and deus-ex-machina Wildlings invasion. Better to have brought him back at the end of last episode, instead of gratuitous tits+naked grandma, so he could feed Thorne to Ghost.
posted by dis_integration at 7:19 PM on May 1, 2016 [6 favorites]
I thought it was better than last week's, but still not great. The Ramsay stuff is just beyond terrible at this point. "I prefer being an only child," please. The Jon Snow stuff could've been worse, I guess. They could have had him pop out of the funeral pyre saying, "I'm on fiiiiiire!"
posted by codacorolla at 7:21 PM on May 1, 2016 [5 favorites]
posted by codacorolla at 7:21 PM on May 1, 2016 [5 favorites]
and I straight-out cackled when Ser Frankenmountain cracked that dude's head on the wall.
Mr. Machine is an English Premiere League fan, and also a huge Ser Frankenmountain fan.
When the head-cracking happened, Mr. Machine yelled, really, really loudly, "CHAT SHIT, GET BANGED!!!!!!"
posted by joyceanmachine at 7:22 PM on May 1, 2016 [6 favorites]
Mr. Machine is an English Premiere League fan, and also a huge Ser Frankenmountain fan.
When the head-cracking happened, Mr. Machine yelled, really, really loudly, "CHAT SHIT, GET BANGED!!!!!!"
posted by joyceanmachine at 7:22 PM on May 1, 2016 [6 favorites]
I AM WAITING FOR WILLIS-HODOR'S BACKSTORY!
I thought it was going to be that Willis got seriously injured when he fought little Ned, and that's why he's disabled, but I guess not.
posted by Sangermaine at 7:22 PM on May 1, 2016 [3 favorites]
I thought it was going to be that Willis got seriously injured when he fought little Ned, and that's why he's disabled, but I guess not.
posted by Sangermaine at 7:22 PM on May 1, 2016 [3 favorites]
Learning Hordur's name puts a whole new spin on "What you talkin' 'about WIllis?!"
posted by Brandon Blatcher at 7:26 PM on May 1, 2016 [5 favorites]
posted by Brandon Blatcher at 7:26 PM on May 1, 2016 [5 favorites]
words alone cannot express how little i care about the ironborn plotline in either the show or the books so just imagine me performing a dramatic isadora duncan piece filled with ennui and disdain
posted by poffin boffin at 7:34 PM on May 1, 2016 [15 favorites]
posted by poffin boffin at 7:34 PM on May 1, 2016 [15 favorites]
With Tywin and Stannis gone I was hoping that Roos could pick up the stern patriarch duties. Oh well.
posted by paper chromatographologist at 7:36 PM on May 1, 2016 [1 favorite]
posted by paper chromatographologist at 7:36 PM on May 1, 2016 [1 favorite]
also im excited to see arya presumably knock that girl's smug smirk across the room along with the majority of her teeth
posted by poffin boffin at 7:36 PM on May 1, 2016 [3 favorites]
posted by poffin boffin at 7:36 PM on May 1, 2016 [3 favorites]
I liked the episode. I hope the Freys get pissed about Wanda's death, but I'm guessing they won't.
posted by drezdn at 7:40 PM on May 1, 2016 [2 favorites]
posted by drezdn at 7:40 PM on May 1, 2016 [2 favorites]
I'm wondering when exactly we get Sam and Gilly in Oldtown. This is another plotline that I'm excited for, because Maester culture has always seemed really cool to me. I'm betting it's mid-season stuff.
posted by codacorolla at 7:46 PM on May 1, 2016 [6 favorites]
posted by codacorolla at 7:46 PM on May 1, 2016 [6 favorites]
So what's a newly resurrected dude to do? Jon had stuck by his Night's Watch vows and pretty much turned his back on everything to fulfill his role with the Watch. Hell, he even made Throne the first ranger to make peace. And they still killed him. Can't imagine he wants any more to do with them. Which is the oddly funny part. Now that he knows he can be brought back, he could stay Lord Commander and have a helluva hold over all others.
Also, does that mean Melissandra can bring back anyone? Plus I'm guessing this does wonders for her belief in the Lord of Light. Though for a minute, I though the show as going to bring back the male priest from season 3 who kept bringing that one guy back. Glad they didn't, this keeps things tidy, character wise.
posted by Brandon Blatcher at 7:56 PM on May 1, 2016
Also, does that mean Melissandra can bring back anyone? Plus I'm guessing this does wonders for her belief in the Lord of Light. Though for a minute, I though the show as going to bring back the male priest from season 3 who kept bringing that one guy back. Glad they didn't, this keeps things tidy, character wise.
posted by Brandon Blatcher at 7:56 PM on May 1, 2016
I see we do have a book included thread again. Those people are wizards and I'd love to hear where they're getting that book.
posted by DirtyOldTown at 8:08 PM on May 1, 2016 [12 favorites]
posted by DirtyOldTown at 8:08 PM on May 1, 2016 [12 favorites]
Further thoughts how things will go: Jon leaves the Watch, after putting/seeing Ed made Lord Commander. Then the plan is for Wildings to help the Watch sure up the Wall, while Jon heads North to reclaim Winterfell, with the idea that setting up defenses all in the North will help slow down the White Walkers. Plus, he'll try to rally other houses to help.
posted by Brandon Blatcher at 8:12 PM on May 1, 2016 [1 favorite]
posted by Brandon Blatcher at 8:12 PM on May 1, 2016 [1 favorite]
I see we do have a book included thread again. Those people are wizards and I'd love to hear where they're getting that book.
There's definitely still some book stuff going on, believe me.
posted by Navelgazer at 8:21 PM on May 1, 2016 [4 favorites]
There's definitely still some book stuff going on, believe me.
posted by Navelgazer at 8:21 PM on May 1, 2016 [4 favorites]
The waif is a teacher who is giving Arya the instruction she needs.
Seriously, you never heard of the good and bad cops?
posted by Pope Guilty at 8:23 PM on May 1, 2016 [1 favorite]
Seriously, you never heard of the good and bad cops?
posted by Pope Guilty at 8:23 PM on May 1, 2016 [1 favorite]
That was strictly a joke, navelgazer. Just jokes.
posted by DirtyOldTown at 8:24 PM on May 1, 2016 [1 favorite]
posted by DirtyOldTown at 8:24 PM on May 1, 2016 [1 favorite]
Yeaaaaaah, I don't think the faceless men have friends per se.
Arya can't meaningful relationships because she's messed up and filled, understandably, with the desire for murdering many people. It's her main focus and with no knowledge that she has family still alive, it'll stay that way.
Hell, the Faceless men are taking a huge chance on taking her in, she's so singleminded and a little insane.
Me, I disappointed that Sansa didn't find out that Arya was witb the Hound. That would have cleared up a lot of things.
posted by Brandon Blatcher at 8:31 PM on May 1, 2016 [2 favorites]
Arya can't meaningful relationships because she's messed up and filled, understandably, with the desire for murdering many people. It's her main focus and with no knowledge that she has family still alive, it'll stay that way.
Hell, the Faceless men are taking a huge chance on taking her in, she's so singleminded and a little insane.
Me, I disappointed that Sansa didn't find out that Arya was witb the Hound. That would have cleared up a lot of things.
posted by Brandon Blatcher at 8:31 PM on May 1, 2016 [2 favorites]
The whole Hodor/Willis backstory kind of makes the Starks seem like dicks, for not calling him by his proper name anymore after he got kicked in the head or whatever.
posted by Strange Interlude at 8:33 PM on May 1, 2016 [2 favorites]
posted by Strange Interlude at 8:33 PM on May 1, 2016 [2 favorites]
Wellllll, you could argue the Starks were already a little dickish for kidnapping Theon from his family asnd making him an infant POW. But hey no big, we raised him as one of our own. Our least favorite, most replaceable one.
posted by DirtyOldTown at 8:39 PM on May 1, 2016 [4 favorites]
posted by DirtyOldTown at 8:39 PM on May 1, 2016 [4 favorites]
"The whole Hodor/Willis backstory kind of makes the Starks seem like dicks, for not calling him by his proper name anymore after he got kicked in the head or whatever."
Possibly, but we don't know the back story yet. It could be a kindness, to not call him by his original name.
posted by Brandon Blatcher at 8:48 PM on May 1, 2016 [2 favorites]
Possibly, but we don't know the back story yet. It could be a kindness, to not call him by his original name.
posted by Brandon Blatcher at 8:48 PM on May 1, 2016 [2 favorites]
Wow, tough crowd. I was way happier with this week's installment, it seems like things are really starting to move forward instead of just shifting a few pieces around the board.
- Roose's death was a nice bookend to his betrayal of Robb and Catelyn Stark at the Red Wedding. I've always gotten the feeling that he never really understood what a monster Ramsay was; his conversation with his bastard about the skinnings and whatnot seemed to be the grumblings of someone who thought that Ramsay was just overdoing it a bit in an effort to impress the old man, not the work of a full-bore psychopath who made Joffrey look like Tommen. Also, I have to give Walda some credit for at least trying to talk Ramsay out of it by appealing to his self-preservation.
- Tyrion finally got to do something besides drink and trade barbs with Varys. I was expecting Missandei to go with him, but it made for a better scene this way.
- The training of DAryadevil proceeds!
- I'm a bit more sanguine about the Ironborn coming back into play than some of the other commenters; I think that they and the Dornish will help in the manner of fresh players being brought off the bench mid-game.
- And I have no real problem with Jon's last-second gasp of life. It leaves the question of whether or not he will still be considered one of the brothers until next week; I strongly suspect that Thorne will use his temporary death to argue that his watch is ended. No idea if that will get him off the hook, though, or what will happen to Olly. I'm sort of hoping that they'll be turned out north of the wall, as a demonstration to any remaining doubters that the wildlings are literally the least of their problems now.
posted by Halloween Jack at 8:57 PM on May 1, 2016 [8 favorites]
- Roose's death was a nice bookend to his betrayal of Robb and Catelyn Stark at the Red Wedding. I've always gotten the feeling that he never really understood what a monster Ramsay was; his conversation with his bastard about the skinnings and whatnot seemed to be the grumblings of someone who thought that Ramsay was just overdoing it a bit in an effort to impress the old man, not the work of a full-bore psychopath who made Joffrey look like Tommen. Also, I have to give Walda some credit for at least trying to talk Ramsay out of it by appealing to his self-preservation.
- Tyrion finally got to do something besides drink and trade barbs with Varys. I was expecting Missandei to go with him, but it made for a better scene this way.
- The training of DAryadevil proceeds!
- I'm a bit more sanguine about the Ironborn coming back into play than some of the other commenters; I think that they and the Dornish will help in the manner of fresh players being brought off the bench mid-game.
- And I have no real problem with Jon's last-second gasp of life. It leaves the question of whether or not he will still be considered one of the brothers until next week; I strongly suspect that Thorne will use his temporary death to argue that his watch is ended. No idea if that will get him off the hook, though, or what will happen to Olly. I'm sort of hoping that they'll be turned out north of the wall, as a demonstration to any remaining doubters that the wildlings are literally the least of their problems now.
posted by Halloween Jack at 8:57 PM on May 1, 2016 [8 favorites]
Wellllll, you could argue the Starks were already a little dickish for kidnapping Theon from his family asnd making him an infant POW.
Ummm... Given Baelon Greyjoy, and what a fucking shithole we saw Pike to be this episode, Theon was kind of fortunate to get the upbringing that he did. Not that he realized it at the time, of course.
posted by sparklemotion at 9:07 PM on May 1, 2016 [8 favorites]
Ummm... Given Baelon Greyjoy, and what a fucking shithole we saw Pike to be this episode, Theon was kind of fortunate to get the upbringing that he did. Not that he realized it at the time, of course.
posted by sparklemotion at 9:07 PM on May 1, 2016 [8 favorites]
I see the interest in whether Jon is still bound by oath to the Watch or not, but the thing is...
1.) We saw from tonight that Jon's people can take his detractors without much of a fight, and
2.) The actual biggest thing going on in Westeros is an army of White Walkers no one is prepared for marching down on them, and
3.) Jon is the only person with any power who recognizes this threat and wants to do anything about it.
Point being, oaths or not, he knows his duty.
posted by Navelgazer at 9:09 PM on May 1, 2016 [4 favorites]
1.) We saw from tonight that Jon's people can take his detractors without much of a fight, and
2.) The actual biggest thing going on in Westeros is an army of White Walkers no one is prepared for marching down on them, and
3.) Jon is the only person with any power who recognizes this threat and wants to do anything about it.
Point being, oaths or not, he knows his duty.
posted by Navelgazer at 9:09 PM on May 1, 2016 [4 favorites]
TOMMEN NO
go play with Ser Pounce like a good boy
posted by feckless fecal fear mongering at 9:23 PM on May 1, 2016 [8 favorites]
go play with Ser Pounce like a good boy
posted by feckless fecal fear mongering at 9:23 PM on May 1, 2016 [8 favorites]
I really hope that someone among Ser Davos and Team Resurrection just goes ahead and kills Ollie before he finds another way to betray them. I guess I'm curious about what they're going to do with Thorne's faction, but it's going to be really boring if the answer is, "give them another chance."
posted by TwoStride at 9:28 PM on May 1, 2016 [1 favorite]
posted by TwoStride at 9:28 PM on May 1, 2016 [1 favorite]
Wun Wun killed that dude by smashing into the wall like an entrails balloon.
Frankenmountain did the same to that guy's head later on.
I'm enjoying the Gallagheresque continuity in this season's violence scenes.
posted by Unicorn on the cob at 9:31 PM on May 1, 2016 [12 favorites]
Frankenmountain did the same to that guy's head later on.
I'm enjoying the Gallagheresque continuity in this season's violence scenes.
posted by Unicorn on the cob at 9:31 PM on May 1, 2016 [12 favorites]
I don't imagine that Thorne's head is going to stay attached for much longer. Maybe they'll decide to make an example of him, and spare the rest of the traitors? I worry that Olly will do something rash though. Poor kid, he's like Arya without a dancing master or a Jaqen.
I also wonder whether the Night's Watch will continue, as an organization. I mean, they were down to what, 50 men? Half of whom were traitors? They've lost their Maester, and the "Lord Commander" is a zombie or something.
And now the wildlings are South of the wall, and outnumber them by orders of magnitude. Thorne was right, things aren't going to be the way they were for the last thousand years.
posted by sparklemotion at 9:37 PM on May 1, 2016
I also wonder whether the Night's Watch will continue, as an organization. I mean, they were down to what, 50 men? Half of whom were traitors? They've lost their Maester, and the "Lord Commander" is a zombie or something.
And now the wildlings are South of the wall, and outnumber them by orders of magnitude. Thorne was right, things aren't going to be the way they were for the last thousand years.
posted by sparklemotion at 9:37 PM on May 1, 2016
I can't help it, every time we see dead Jon I think of this.
We don't KNOW Melisandre raised him; maybe she just repaired the body enough that he could safely de-warg. It wasn't until it was just him and Ghost in the room, and then Ghost moves, and THEN Jon wakes up. Also, everybody's remarkably chill about hanging out with a loose, possibly grief-mad direwolf.
Although I know he's not going to die, the scene with Tyrion and the dragons was legit scary.
I realllllllllllly could have done without the Walda death scenes, especially dragged out to such length. We get Ramsey's a monster, and infant peril is only ever manipulative. Unnecessarily so here because we get Ramsey's a monster.
Tyrion realizing he was insulting two eunuchs, not just the one he meant to, was priceless.
posted by Eyebrows McGee at 9:38 PM on May 1, 2016 [20 favorites]
We don't KNOW Melisandre raised him; maybe she just repaired the body enough that he could safely de-warg. It wasn't until it was just him and Ghost in the room, and then Ghost moves, and THEN Jon wakes up. Also, everybody's remarkably chill about hanging out with a loose, possibly grief-mad direwolf.
Although I know he's not going to die, the scene with Tyrion and the dragons was legit scary.
I realllllllllllly could have done without the Walda death scenes, especially dragged out to such length. We get Ramsey's a monster, and infant peril is only ever manipulative. Unnecessarily so here because we get Ramsey's a monster.
Tyrion realizing he was insulting two eunuchs, not just the one he meant to, was priceless.
posted by Eyebrows McGee at 9:38 PM on May 1, 2016 [20 favorites]
If they give Ramsay the Prince Humperdinck treatment I will break shit.
posted by toomanycurls at 10:31 PM on May 1, 2016 [1 favorite]
posted by toomanycurls at 10:31 PM on May 1, 2016 [1 favorite]
INT. HBO WRITER'S ROOM - DAY
HBO EXECUTIVE: Quickly! I am getting predictive supercomputer reports that viewers will have forgotten what a one-dimensional bad person Ramsay is between episode 1 and episode 2 of season 6. We really need to kick it up a notch before the episode is out!
HBO WRITER #74: Perhaps he could stab his father to death in the guts?
HBO EXECUTIVE: No, no, that's not enough! That's bullshit, I can get that on free-to-air TV during weekday lunchtime! This is HBO you motherfuckers!
HBO WRITER #13: What about he stabs his father to death in the guts...JUST AFTER Roose is told that he has a newborn baby boy?
HBO EXECUTIVE: The viewers won't understand! What are we paying you all for? This is our network's flagship television programme! Get out, get out!
HBO WRITER #107: What about something with dogs?
HBO EXECUTIVE: ...go on...
HBO WRITER #107: Maybe Ramsay could...get the dogs to...do something to the mother and the newborn baby?
HBO EXECUTIVE: I like where this is heading! More details, more!
HBO WRITER #107: Like...maybe...eat them both alive?
HBO EXECUTIVE: It's not what I was thinking, but I suppose the showrunners DID go on record that we were going to ease up on the rape stuff. Anyway, we've no time left, we'll have to run with it!
HBO WRITER #28: We're on it boss!
HBO EXECUTIVE: Also remember we need a minimum of two headsplats in the first ten minutes, it's in our KPIs!
posted by turbid dahlia at 10:53 PM on May 1, 2016 [9 favorites]
HBO EXECUTIVE: Quickly! I am getting predictive supercomputer reports that viewers will have forgotten what a one-dimensional bad person Ramsay is between episode 1 and episode 2 of season 6. We really need to kick it up a notch before the episode is out!
HBO WRITER #74: Perhaps he could stab his father to death in the guts?
HBO EXECUTIVE: No, no, that's not enough! That's bullshit, I can get that on free-to-air TV during weekday lunchtime! This is HBO you motherfuckers!
HBO WRITER #13: What about he stabs his father to death in the guts...JUST AFTER Roose is told that he has a newborn baby boy?
HBO EXECUTIVE: The viewers won't understand! What are we paying you all for? This is our network's flagship television programme! Get out, get out!
HBO WRITER #107: What about something with dogs?
HBO EXECUTIVE: ...go on...
HBO WRITER #107: Maybe Ramsay could...get the dogs to...do something to the mother and the newborn baby?
HBO EXECUTIVE: I like where this is heading! More details, more!
HBO WRITER #107: Like...maybe...eat them both alive?
HBO EXECUTIVE: It's not what I was thinking, but I suppose the showrunners DID go on record that we were going to ease up on the rape stuff. Anyway, we've no time left, we'll have to run with it!
HBO WRITER #28: We're on it boss!
HBO EXECUTIVE: Also remember we need a minimum of two headsplats in the first ten minutes, it's in our KPIs!
posted by turbid dahlia at 10:53 PM on May 1, 2016 [9 favorites]
Turns out all Jon needed was a haircut, a sponge bath, and some alone time.
posted by BungaDunga at 10:56 PM on May 1, 2016 [32 favorites]
posted by BungaDunga at 10:56 PM on May 1, 2016 [32 favorites]
I VOLUNTEER AS TRIBUTE
posted by feckless fecal fear mongering at 10:57 PM on May 1, 2016 [10 favorites]
posted by feckless fecal fear mongering at 10:57 PM on May 1, 2016 [10 favorites]
I see the interest in whether Jon is still bound by oath to the Watch or not, but the thing is
...
Point being, oaths or not, he knows his duty.
On the other hand, look at the title of the next episode. Or don't, cus spoilers.
posted by thetruthisjustalie at 11:09 PM on May 1, 2016 [2 favorites]
...
Point being, oaths or not, he knows his duty.
On the other hand, look at the title of the next episode. Or don't, cus spoilers.
posted by thetruthisjustalie at 11:09 PM on May 1, 2016 [2 favorites]
Huh. It sure is un-fun to really enjoy an episode, then come here hoping for smart commentary, but mostly find people mocking the episode or hating on it. Oh well.
Are we permitted to discuss the teaser for the next episode, or is that considered a spoiler?
posted by Conrad Cornelius o'Donald o'Dell at 11:15 PM on May 1, 2016 [10 favorites]
Are we permitted to discuss the teaser for the next episode, or is that considered a spoiler?
posted by Conrad Cornelius o'Donald o'Dell at 11:15 PM on May 1, 2016 [10 favorites]
Oh, I thought it was a great episode. Especially Operation Dragon Freedom! Good to see the Iron Islands again too.
posted by turbid dahlia at 11:21 PM on May 1, 2016 [1 favorite]
posted by turbid dahlia at 11:21 PM on May 1, 2016 [1 favorite]
Are we permitted to discuss the teaser for the next episode, or is that considered a spoiler?
Spoiler: "please refrain from discussing events that take place in future episodes."
I liked this episode too; although I would have preferred (and for a moment thought that it was) Roose to kill Ramsey.
posted by We had a deal, Kyle at 11:26 PM on May 1, 2016 [3 favorites]
Spoiler: "please refrain from discussing events that take place in future episodes."
I liked this episode too; although I would have preferred (and for a moment thought that it was) Roose to kill Ramsey.
posted by We had a deal, Kyle at 11:26 PM on May 1, 2016 [3 favorites]
Yep, it definitely was not instantly clear who was stabbing whom. Despite Ramsay's penchant for savagery, I was still shocked at the turn of events.
posted by Conrad Cornelius o'Donald o'Dell at 11:41 PM on May 1, 2016 [3 favorites]
posted by Conrad Cornelius o'Donald o'Dell at 11:41 PM on May 1, 2016 [3 favorites]
The one thing Ramsay wanted above all else was the name, to be legitimate. His father was a moron (uncharacteristically so) to even suggest he'd take it away.
posted by feckless fecal fear mongering at 11:57 PM on May 1, 2016 [4 favorites]
posted by feckless fecal fear mongering at 11:57 PM on May 1, 2016 [4 favorites]
It's a bad idea to keep dragons on a leash.
Next scene. It 's a bad idea to try to keep psychopath Ramsey on a leash.
A few scenes later. Well those dogs were never really on leashes.
posted by rdr at 2:15 AM on May 2, 2016 [3 favorites]
Next scene. It 's a bad idea to try to keep psychopath Ramsey on a leash.
A few scenes later. Well those dogs were never really on leashes.
posted by rdr at 2:15 AM on May 2, 2016 [3 favorites]
Hmm, in the "previously on GoT" someone mentioned to Bran that he can warg and that it's in his blood. I wonder if Jon warged into Ghost and then Melisanndre was able to pull him back. If so, how did that time in Ghost change Jon?
The dude from season 3 who was brought back six times mentioned that he'd lose little bits of himself each time. So will Jon be different?
posted by Brandon Blatcher at 3:41 AM on May 2, 2016 [1 favorite]
The dude from season 3 who was brought back six times mentioned that he'd lose little bits of himself each time. So will Jon be different?
posted by Brandon Blatcher at 3:41 AM on May 2, 2016 [1 favorite]
Well, I enjoyed it. Some total assholes got completely murdered. Yay! Fuck you, Bolton! Have a nice flight, Iron guy! Gross and creepy sexist bar blowhard got splatted. Woot! And Wun Wun had some fun!
posted by His thoughts were red thoughts at 3:46 AM on May 2, 2016 [5 favorites]
posted by His thoughts were red thoughts at 3:46 AM on May 2, 2016 [5 favorites]
Gross and creepy sexist bar blowhard got splatted.
I did wonder if that was added in by the showrunners as atonement for the rapiness of seasons 4 and 5. I doubt they changed much about the general story for that purposes, but that seemed too spot on.
Also noticed that when Brienne galloped into save Sansa last episode, one of Ramsay's men sneered "It's a woman," before having his throat cut by said woman. Then this episode had the always capable Yara standing up to Balon and then seemingly putting herself in the race to be Queen of the Iron Islands.
posted by Brandon Blatcher at 4:03 AM on May 2, 2016 [3 favorites]
I did wonder if that was added in by the showrunners as atonement for the rapiness of seasons 4 and 5. I doubt they changed much about the general story for that purposes, but that seemed too spot on.
Also noticed that when Brienne galloped into save Sansa last episode, one of Ramsay's men sneered "It's a woman," before having his throat cut by said woman. Then this episode had the always capable Yara standing up to Balon and then seemingly putting herself in the race to be Queen of the Iron Islands.
posted by Brandon Blatcher at 4:03 AM on May 2, 2016 [3 favorites]
Also noticed that when Brienne galloped into save Sansa last episode, one of Ramsay's men sneered "It's a woman," before having his throat cut by said woman. Then this episode had the always capable Yara standing up to Balon and then seemingly putting herself in the race to be Queen of the Iron Islands.
It's not just that. Dorne, Danereys, Sansa, Cersei --- all the major threads bar the wall are or are on their way to being run by women. It occurred to me to wonder: if the patriarchal system whose evils the show so thoroughly depicts were flipped to a matriarchy by series' end, and the world thereby saved, how would that impact people's assessment of the show?
I don't know that I could make a strong argument that this will happen, to be clear. The fact that women have risen to power in pretty much ever plot strand is suggestive, but hey, Jon Snow's still alive and there's a lot of story to get chewed through, and presumably a fair amount of brutality.
posted by Diablevert at 4:22 AM on May 2, 2016 [1 favorite]
Yara's been underused so far and I'm delighted it looks like they're finally going to attempt something with her story. After last season and the showrunners' generally tone-deaf response to feminist criticism, I don't have much faith at all in their abilities to do something interesting with her, but it is refreshing to at least see them trying.
I was really happy with this episode, too; some palace intrigue, Tyrion being incredibly brave (the look on Varys' face as he watches Tyrion walk back up the vault steps was perfect), a great new look at the Ironborne castle and culture (the Iron Islands bit in the opening animation felt new too, and I love little cultural stuff like that scornful "What kind of Iron Islander loses his mind in a storm?) and the more rapid clip at which things are moving along in the too-predictable Arya and Jon stories are all working nicely to bring this show back from the brink.
Had we ever seen Theon Greyjoy's uncle before he murdered the king?
posted by mediareport at 4:28 AM on May 2, 2016 [3 favorites]
I was really happy with this episode, too; some palace intrigue, Tyrion being incredibly brave (the look on Varys' face as he watches Tyrion walk back up the vault steps was perfect), a great new look at the Ironborne castle and culture (the Iron Islands bit in the opening animation felt new too, and I love little cultural stuff like that scornful "What kind of Iron Islander loses his mind in a storm?) and the more rapid clip at which things are moving along in the too-predictable Arya and Jon stories are all working nicely to bring this show back from the brink.
Had we ever seen Theon Greyjoy's uncle before he murdered the king?
posted by mediareport at 4:28 AM on May 2, 2016 [3 favorites]
No, we have not.
posted by Brandon Blatcher at 4:31 AM on May 2, 2016
posted by Brandon Blatcher at 4:31 AM on May 2, 2016
Oh, good. My memory's not as bad as I thought. But that was kind of an abrupt way to give us an opportunity for Yara without making her a king-killer.
posted by mediareport at 5:10 AM on May 2, 2016 [1 favorite]
posted by mediareport at 5:10 AM on May 2, 2016 [1 favorite]
Finally, Bran gets to find out: what is the Matrix
posted by DoctorFedora at 5:24 AM on May 2, 2016 [7 favorites]
posted by DoctorFedora at 5:24 AM on May 2, 2016 [7 favorites]
Yeah, but I'm pro Yara, all the way, so if she can put in appearances, that's fine by me. Hell, Daenerys needs a fleet doesn't she? Yara would make a helluva Lord of Ships.
Also y'all, note that Ramsay's allies are the Karstarks and the Umbers. Rickon was last seen with Osha, heading towards the Last Hearth, which is the home of House Umber. So we might see those two real soon! But because its Ramsay, we might not see Osha for long.
We saw GreatJon Umber in season one, as a advisor to Robb Stark. He's been off in the Riverlands, fighting Lannisters, so what he's doing aligning with Ramsay is unknown at this point. He seemed loyal to Robb, so why would he align with Roose Bolton, who betrayed Robb?
posted by Brandon Blatcher at 5:25 AM on May 2, 2016
Also y'all, note that Ramsay's allies are the Karstarks and the Umbers. Rickon was last seen with Osha, heading towards the Last Hearth, which is the home of House Umber. So we might see those two real soon! But because its Ramsay, we might not see Osha for long.
We saw GreatJon Umber in season one, as a advisor to Robb Stark. He's been off in the Riverlands, fighting Lannisters, so what he's doing aligning with Ramsay is unknown at this point. He seemed loyal to Robb, so why would he align with Roose Bolton, who betrayed Robb?
posted by Brandon Blatcher at 5:25 AM on May 2, 2016
I don't have much faith at all in their abilities to do something interesting with her, but it is refreshing to at least see them trying.
I am very curious how they'll handle Sansa. Personally, I'd love to see Brienne teaching her a bit of sword work, so she can stab Ramsey at some point. But that isn't like Sansa, who's more suited to throne room politics. Poderick could be a useful tool in that regard, but will the show allow Sansa to be a major ruler? I'd like to see her as Lady of Winterfell, but Bran and Ricon are still alive and with the implication that Bran would be leaving the Raven's home, that puts Sansa's position in doubt.
There does seem to be a long term plan with Sansa, story wise, but it's a really long plan that's been moving slowly. I'm not confident the show will do her justice in the way I see fit.
posted by Brandon Blatcher at 5:32 AM on May 2, 2016
I am very curious how they'll handle Sansa. Personally, I'd love to see Brienne teaching her a bit of sword work, so she can stab Ramsey at some point. But that isn't like Sansa, who's more suited to throne room politics. Poderick could be a useful tool in that regard, but will the show allow Sansa to be a major ruler? I'd like to see her as Lady of Winterfell, but Bran and Ricon are still alive and with the implication that Bran would be leaving the Raven's home, that puts Sansa's position in doubt.
There does seem to be a long term plan with Sansa, story wise, but it's a really long plan that's been moving slowly. I'm not confident the show will do her justice in the way I see fit.
posted by Brandon Blatcher at 5:32 AM on May 2, 2016
I think most bannermen are pretty comfortable switching allegiances depending on which way the winds are blowing, especially when the House they are vassal to is as thoroughly destroyed as the Starks appear to be. Now, whether Ramsay can and should trust him is another story...
posted by Rock Steady at 5:36 AM on May 2, 2016 [1 favorite]
posted by Rock Steady at 5:36 AM on May 2, 2016 [1 favorite]
I actually laughed out loud when Melisandre started cutting off bits of Jon's hair, because of the mass social media freakout that ensued last year over Kit Harington's hair/beard length, as a possible indicator of his continued employment status on GoT. I wonder if that was always part of the scene (which was almost certainly written/conceived before the end of last season) or if it was an elbow-nudge at the fandom.
posted by Strange Interlude at 5:52 AM on May 2, 2016 [7 favorites]
posted by Strange Interlude at 5:52 AM on May 2, 2016 [7 favorites]
It reminded me of the weird shaving ritual scene in the Prisoner, actually
posted by DoctorFedora at 5:58 AM on May 2, 2016 [1 favorite]
posted by DoctorFedora at 5:58 AM on May 2, 2016 [1 favorite]
It probably marks Jon as being a bit different after coming back.
posted by Brandon Blatcher at 6:00 AM on May 2, 2016 [1 favorite]
posted by Brandon Blatcher at 6:00 AM on May 2, 2016 [1 favorite]
We saw GreatJon Umber in season one, as a advisor to Robb Stark. He's been off in the Riverlands, fighting Lannisters, so what he's doing aligning with Ramsay is unknown at this point. He seemed loyal to Robb, so why would he align with Roose Bolton, who betrayed Robb?
I dunno. I mean, there are like, no Starks left as far as anyone knows. Gotta go with the flow (I think that's the Umber motto <g>)
posted by dis_integration at 6:05 AM on May 2, 2016
I dunno. I mean, there are like, no Starks left as far as anyone knows. Gotta go with the flow (I think that's the Umber motto <g>)
posted by dis_integration at 6:05 AM on May 2, 2016
Oh my point here is that Rickon and Osha were headed to House Umber, so the Umbers might (could? should?) have Rickon. If not, then where did Rickon end up? And if he returns does that completely upend Sansa's claim to being Wardeness of the North (Baelish's plan)? Yeah, probably, so then what does Sansa do?
posted by Brandon Blatcher at 6:20 AM on May 2, 2016
posted by Brandon Blatcher at 6:20 AM on May 2, 2016
- Tyrion finally got to do something besides drink and trade barbs with Varys. I was expecting Missandei to go with him, but it made for a better scene this way.
I thought it would have been a better seen had she accompanied him. I was disappointed in this scene because it seemed so out of character. It felt like someone said "hey we need to get more Dinklage in here so put him in with the dragons." What was the point of asking her if she was familiar with the dragons if not to bring her? I would have loved to see him hiding behind her and doing all the talking while she cautiously eased off their chains. And would Varys really have gone with him? I don't think so. That whole scene seemed off. They did manage to create a good amount of tension despite the fact that no one would really have expected them to kill off Tyrion in this way.
posted by GrapeApiary at 6:27 AM on May 2, 2016 [8 favorites]
I thought it would have been a better seen had she accompanied him. I was disappointed in this scene because it seemed so out of character. It felt like someone said "hey we need to get more Dinklage in here so put him in with the dragons." What was the point of asking her if she was familiar with the dragons if not to bring her? I would have loved to see him hiding behind her and doing all the talking while she cautiously eased off their chains. And would Varys really have gone with him? I don't think so. That whole scene seemed off. They did manage to create a good amount of tension despite the fact that no one would really have expected them to kill off Tyrion in this way.
posted by GrapeApiary at 6:27 AM on May 2, 2016 [8 favorites]
Oh my point here is that Rickon and Osha were headed to House Umber, so the Umbers might (could? should?) have Rickon.
I'd assumed that Rickon/Osha had hopped into the boat with Gendry and paddled off to the misty isles to live with all of the other characters that nobody remembers.
posted by Strange Interlude at 6:38 AM on May 2, 2016 [5 favorites]
I'd assumed that Rickon/Osha had hopped into the boat with Gendry and paddled off to the misty isles to live with all of the other characters that nobody remembers.
posted by Strange Interlude at 6:38 AM on May 2, 2016 [5 favorites]
Like that guy in Season 2 or 3 that was brought back from the dead.
posted by Brandon Blatcher at 6:43 AM on May 2, 2016 [1 favorite]
posted by Brandon Blatcher at 6:43 AM on May 2, 2016 [1 favorite]
Halloween Jack: I was way happier with this week's installment, it seems like things are really starting to move forward instead of just shifting a few pieces around the board.
Last week was the season opener, reminding viewers where things left off. In TV talk, it's a "place-setting" episode, and to be expected with such a large cast strewn around this fictional world.
Unicorn on the cob: I'm enjoying the Gallagheresque continuity in this season's violence scenes.
I look forward to someone editing those scenes with reaction shots from Gallagher shows, where people are wearing plastic ponchos and getting splattered with watermelon goop, but cheering and having a grand old time. You know, for the gleeful dissonance.
sparklemotion: And now the wildlings are South of the wall, and outnumber them by orders of magnitude. Thorne was right, things aren't going to be the way they were for the last thousand years.
Well, the wall served to slow down wildlings, which it did, even with a handful of people. But to stop the White Walkers, you'd have to have the wall operating at peak levels to make it withstand that, plus a bunch of obsidian weapons. In other words, the White Walkers are not normal in the history of the wall (except when it was first built, I'd imagine).
BungaDunga: Turns out all Jon needed was a haircut, a sponge bath, and some alone time.
I feel bad for bald people who died. Someone will likely say "hey, can't we bring Bob back?" only to be shot down by someone who paid attention. "Nah, you need to burn his hair, and he doesn't have any." "What about .. you know, down there?" "I think he's bald all over." "Yeah, probably so. Sorry, Bob."
posted by filthy light thief at 7:13 AM on May 2, 2016 [12 favorites]
Last week was the season opener, reminding viewers where things left off. In TV talk, it's a "place-setting" episode, and to be expected with such a large cast strewn around this fictional world.
Unicorn on the cob: I'm enjoying the Gallagheresque continuity in this season's violence scenes.
I look forward to someone editing those scenes with reaction shots from Gallagher shows, where people are wearing plastic ponchos and getting splattered with watermelon goop, but cheering and having a grand old time. You know, for the gleeful dissonance.
sparklemotion: And now the wildlings are South of the wall, and outnumber them by orders of magnitude. Thorne was right, things aren't going to be the way they were for the last thousand years.
Well, the wall served to slow down wildlings, which it did, even with a handful of people. But to stop the White Walkers, you'd have to have the wall operating at peak levels to make it withstand that, plus a bunch of obsidian weapons. In other words, the White Walkers are not normal in the history of the wall (except when it was first built, I'd imagine).
BungaDunga: Turns out all Jon needed was a haircut, a sponge bath, and some alone time.
I feel bad for bald people who died. Someone will likely say "hey, can't we bring Bob back?" only to be shot down by someone who paid attention. "Nah, you need to burn his hair, and he doesn't have any." "What about .. you know, down there?" "I think he's bald all over." "Yeah, probably so. Sorry, Bob."
posted by filthy light thief at 7:13 AM on May 2, 2016 [12 favorites]
Brandon Blatcher: The dude from season 3 who was brought back six times mentioned that he'd lose little bits of himself each time. So will Jon be different?
Brandon Blatcher: [The hair and beard trim] probably marks Jon as being a bit different after coming back.
"Whoa, Jon's back!"
"I am amazed!"
"But does he seem different to you?"
Jon now has a perpetual far-off gaze, as if he's looking through everything.
"Yeah, his hair's shorter and his beard has been trimmed. Looking good, sir!"
posted by filthy light thief at 7:16 AM on May 2, 2016 [5 favorites]
Brandon Blatcher: [The hair and beard trim] probably marks Jon as being a bit different after coming back.
"Whoa, Jon's back!"
"I am amazed!"
"But does he seem different to you?"
Jon now has a perpetual far-off gaze, as if he's looking through everything.
"Yeah, his hair's shorter and his beard has been trimmed. Looking good, sir!"
posted by filthy light thief at 7:16 AM on May 2, 2016 [5 favorites]
I thought the episode was great. I generally avoid internet fandom/spoiler sites so I didn't read any of the speculation about Kit Harrington and "is he or isn't he". I'm super excited he's back in whatever form. I subscribe to the "he was warged into Ghost" theory. Also loved the Tyrion scene with the dragons. Genuinely tense and exciting and I thought very much in character. He's shown himself to be brave time and again despite his veneer of self-interest.
posted by freecellwizard at 7:18 AM on May 2, 2016 [2 favorites]
posted by freecellwizard at 7:18 AM on May 2, 2016 [2 favorites]
One episode, they should have Ramsay do something genuinely not evil. Not even nice: just not horrible. Maybe he could calculate harvest yields and manpower allocations without having someone threatened, tortured or executed. People around him wouldn't know what was going on and would be screaming on the inside every time Ramsay asked them an innocuous question. He could go back to randomly killing people the next episode, provided they weren't the ones he was not evil to, who would just get more and more freaked out.
That would be fun.
posted by cardboard at 7:21 AM on May 2, 2016 [8 favorites]
That would be fun.
posted by cardboard at 7:21 AM on May 2, 2016 [8 favorites]
codacorolla: I'm wondering when exactly we get Sam and Gilly in Oldtown.
Same time Sam makes land. *rimshot*
People around him wouldn't know what was going on and would be screaming on the inside every time Ramsay asked them an innocuous question.
That was his father's strength, not his. The threat and potential being the true weapon of a skilled torturer, and all that. Nope, Ramsay got the sadistic bloodlust, but none of the patience. But he was quick to point out his plan on attacking Jon Snow at the wall wouldn't sink them as much as his father thought was a good bit of mental arithmetic on his part.
Except then what - you have another castle you don't really want, and worse, it's guarding the frozen north. So minus points for everyone in the room at that point.
posted by filthy light thief at 7:24 AM on May 2, 2016 [2 favorites]
Same time Sam makes land. *rimshot*
People around him wouldn't know what was going on and would be screaming on the inside every time Ramsay asked them an innocuous question.
That was his father's strength, not his. The threat and potential being the true weapon of a skilled torturer, and all that. Nope, Ramsay got the sadistic bloodlust, but none of the patience. But he was quick to point out his plan on attacking Jon Snow at the wall wouldn't sink them as much as his father thought was a good bit of mental arithmetic on his part.
Except then what - you have another castle you don't really want, and worse, it's guarding the frozen north. So minus points for everyone in the room at that point.
posted by filthy light thief at 7:24 AM on May 2, 2016 [2 favorites]
I loved Viserion being all "oooh me next!" when Tyrion was unchaining the dragons
posted by krix at 7:25 AM on May 2, 2016 [5 favorites]
posted by krix at 7:25 AM on May 2, 2016 [5 favorites]
I loved Viserion being all "oooh me next!" when Tyrion was unchaining the dragons
Right?! So fucking adorable, very well done by the effects team.
But it does pose an interesting situation: Will those two dragons prefer Tyrion, who freed them, vs Daenerys, who betrayed them by chaining them up? If so, does Tyrion use that connection for his own ends? Probably not, more likely he'd impress upon Dany how important it is to treat the dragons as equals.
Yet, having his own dragon was a childhood dream, sooo maybe?
posted by Brandon Blatcher at 7:42 AM on May 2, 2016 [2 favorites]
Right?! So fucking adorable, very well done by the effects team.
But it does pose an interesting situation: Will those two dragons prefer Tyrion, who freed them, vs Daenerys, who betrayed them by chaining them up? If so, does Tyrion use that connection for his own ends? Probably not, more likely he'd impress upon Dany how important it is to treat the dragons as equals.
Yet, having his own dragon was a childhood dream, sooo maybe?
posted by Brandon Blatcher at 7:42 AM on May 2, 2016 [2 favorites]
I betting she'll sacrifice in some way.
Yep, I'm thinking she'll probably kill this one herself. Especially since the religious wackos are sort of using him as a puppet.
I'm sorry but when Melissandre was doing her incantations over Jon, all I could think was, "Owah tagu siam."
posted by fuse theorem at 8:04 AM on May 2, 2016 [1 favorite]
Yep, I'm thinking she'll probably kill this one herself. Especially since the religious wackos are sort of using him as a puppet.
I'm sorry but when Melissandre was doing her incantations over Jon, all I could think was, "Owah tagu siam."
posted by fuse theorem at 8:04 AM on May 2, 2016 [1 favorite]
The Jon Snow stuff could've been worse, I guess. They could have had him pop out of the funeral pyre saying, "I'm on fiiiiiire!"
"I've got blisters on my fingers!!!!"
posted by tilde at 8:09 AM on May 2, 2016 [9 favorites]
"I've got blisters on my fingers!!!!"
posted by tilde at 8:09 AM on May 2, 2016 [9 favorites]
So, the dragons are off the leash, but that door looks too small for them to get out of. I had thought Tyrion's idea was to let the dragons out to go wreak havoc upon the cities that fell back under the rule of slavers.
posted by dnash at 8:12 AM on May 2, 2016 [1 favorite]
posted by dnash at 8:12 AM on May 2, 2016 [1 favorite]
" What was the point of asking [Missandei] if she was familiar with the dragons if not to bring her?"
I just took it as, "Hey, so ... I haven't been around here very long, but you have. Have you seen whether or not it's possible for someone who is not Daenerys to actually get close to those things without getting eaten?"
posted by komara at 8:15 AM on May 2, 2016 [6 favorites]
I just took it as, "Hey, so ... I haven't been around here very long, but you have. Have you seen whether or not it's possible for someone who is not Daenerys to actually get close to those things without getting eaten?"
posted by komara at 8:15 AM on May 2, 2016 [6 favorites]
And now the wildlings are South of the wall, and outnumber them by orders of magnitude. Thorne was right, things aren't going to be the way they were for the last thousand years.Well, the wall served to slow down wildlings, which it did, even with a handful of people. But to stop the White Walkers, you'd have to have the wall operating at peak levels to make it withstand that, plus a bunch of obsidian weapons. In other words, the White Walkers are not normal in the history of the wall (except when it was first built, I'd imagine).
Yep... My thinking is that it's not going to be the Night's Watch in charge at Castle Black anymore.
posted by sparklemotion at 8:16 AM on May 2, 2016 [1 favorite]
I loved "This is what I do. I drink and I know things.".
I thought it was ok that Missandei did not go with Tyrian. They have no relationship whatsoever. When you are scared, you bring a friend instead.
posted by about_time at 8:21 AM on May 2, 2016 [8 favorites]
I thought it was ok that Missandei did not go with Tyrian. They have no relationship whatsoever. When you are scared, you bring a friend instead.
posted by about_time at 8:21 AM on May 2, 2016 [8 favorites]
So, the dragons are off the leash, but that door looks too small for them to get out of. I had thought Tyrion's idea was to let the dragons out to go wreak havoc upon the cities that fell back under the rule of slavers.
I thought that the sort of distant/fading dragony growling-clanking noises off in the darkness meant that there was another way out, maybe?
posted by poffin boffin at 8:22 AM on May 2, 2016 [3 favorites]
I thought that the sort of distant/fading dragony growling-clanking noises off in the darkness meant that there was another way out, maybe?
posted by poffin boffin at 8:22 AM on May 2, 2016 [3 favorites]
So, the dragons are off the leash, but that door looks too small for them to get out of. I had thought Tyrion's idea was to let the dragons out to go wreak havoc upon the cities that fell back under the rule of slavers.
Eh, they just made. You don't ask your new found dragon buddy to wreak havoc after one date, you gotta go slow. Get'em feeding regularly first or establish that you can ride on one and guide its flight before taking off to quell a rebellion.
posted by Brandon Blatcher at 8:24 AM on May 2, 2016 [2 favorites]
Eh, they just made. You don't ask your new found dragon buddy to wreak havoc after one date, you gotta go slow. Get'em feeding regularly first or establish that you can ride on one and guide its flight before taking off to quell a rebellion.
posted by Brandon Blatcher at 8:24 AM on May 2, 2016 [2 favorites]
"This is what we do. He makes eunuch jokes, I make dwarf jokes."
"I do not make dwarf jokes."
"No, but you think them."
posted by DirtyOldTown at 8:27 AM on May 2, 2016 [7 favorites]
"I do not make dwarf jokes."
"No, but you think them."
posted by DirtyOldTown at 8:27 AM on May 2, 2016 [7 favorites]
So, the dragons are off the leash, but that door looks too small for them to get out of. I had thought Tyrion's idea was to let the dragons out to go wreak havoc upon the cities that fell back under the rule of slavers.
I assume there's some big door on the other side that is still closed. I thought the point of that was the beginning of Tyrion establishing a relationship of trust with the dragons so that he could get them to do what he wanted. I mean, right now, let them out, and they'll just go eat some goats and have fun dragon times. Why would they care about the rest of Slaver's Bay? He's gotta find some way to control them first, and the first step was making friends.
posted by dis_integration at 8:27 AM on May 2, 2016 [3 favorites]
I assume there's some big door on the other side that is still closed. I thought the point of that was the beginning of Tyrion establishing a relationship of trust with the dragons so that he could get them to do what he wanted. I mean, right now, let them out, and they'll just go eat some goats and have fun dragon times. Why would they care about the rest of Slaver's Bay? He's gotta find some way to control them first, and the first step was making friends.
posted by dis_integration at 8:27 AM on May 2, 2016 [3 favorites]
His thoughts were red thoughts: Gross and creepy sexist bar blowhard got splatted. Woot!
Brandon Blatcher: I did wonder if that was added in by the showrunners as atonement for the rapiness of seasons 4 and 5. I doubt they changed much about the general story for that purposes, but that seemed too spot on.
Ditto Jaime's confrontation of the High Sparrow: "What about my sins? I broke a sacred oath and stabbed my king in the back. I killed my own cousin. When the gods judged my brother guilty, I helped him escape their justice. What atonement do I deserve?"
(Answer: uh, none. For now? Yeah, we'll go with that.)
posted by filthy light thief at 8:27 AM on May 2, 2016 [4 favorites]
Brandon Blatcher: I did wonder if that was added in by the showrunners as atonement for the rapiness of seasons 4 and 5. I doubt they changed much about the general story for that purposes, but that seemed too spot on.
Ditto Jaime's confrontation of the High Sparrow: "What about my sins? I broke a sacred oath and stabbed my king in the back. I killed my own cousin. When the gods judged my brother guilty, I helped him escape their justice. What atonement do I deserve?"
(Answer: uh, none. For now? Yeah, we'll go with that.)
posted by filthy light thief at 8:27 AM on May 2, 2016 [4 favorites]
Doesn't the small tasty treat walking away from hungry dragons pretty much prove Targaryen blood line?
posted by sammyo at 8:51 AM on May 2, 2016
posted by sammyo at 8:51 AM on May 2, 2016
Can someone point me to a primer on the Tyrion Targaryen theory? Like -- how was that supposed to have happened?
posted by sparklemotion at 8:52 AM on May 2, 2016
posted by sparklemotion at 8:52 AM on May 2, 2016
Buzzfeed: 58 Thoughts I Had Watching This Week’s “Game Of Thrones,” Including “Oh Hot Holy Damn”
Personal Favs:
Personal Favs:
10. Meera wants to leave? Girl has no respect for the training montage.posted by Brandon Blatcher at 8:52 AM on May 2, 2016 [6 favorites]
16. Game of Thrones is weird because we’re all sitting here getting really excited for people to burn a body.
20. Jaime Lannister is now the voice of reason in King’s Landing. That’s what we’ve come to.
27. So Daenerys is Mother of Dragons; Missandei is Babysitter of Dragons. Or maybe like, Cool Aunt of Dragons.
36. GIRL, DO NOT GIVE HIM THAT BABY.
37. GIRL, DO NOT GO IN THERE WITH THE HOUNDS.
45. “Do you know of…any magic that could bring him back?” Ser Davos is all of us right now.
Despite having seen set photos depicting how they film the dragon scenes (it's really goofy and involves a stick with a green blob-shaped bundle on the end), or maybe because of that, I was really impressed with Peter Dinklage's acting in the scene with the dragons. The fear, wonder, and delight all mingling in him as he approached the dragons, the vindication of his childhood fantasy... it was great.
posted by Aubergine at 8:59 AM on May 2, 2016 [15 favorites]
posted by Aubergine at 8:59 AM on May 2, 2016 [15 favorites]
Jaime Lannister is now the voice of reason in King’s Landing. That’s what we’ve come to.
In his favor, he's grown up. Points against: he straight up threatened to kill the High Sparrow in front of the body of his dead daughter.
posted by filthy light thief at 9:08 AM on May 2, 2016 [3 favorites]
In his favor, he's grown up. Points against: he straight up threatened to kill the High Sparrow in front of the body of his dead daughter.
posted by filthy light thief at 9:08 AM on May 2, 2016 [3 favorites]
I subscribe to the "he was warged into Ghost" theory.
The editing (Jon's still dead, cut to Ghost, Ghost looks straight at Jon, HE'S ALIVE) takes that from 'theory' to 'we have all but told you what just happened.'
"This is what I do. I drink and I know things."
approximately one billion nerds are going to get this on a shirt and I am first in line
posted by feckless fecal fear mongering at 9:09 AM on May 2, 2016 [11 favorites]
The editing (Jon's still dead, cut to Ghost, Ghost looks straight at Jon, HE'S ALIVE) takes that from 'theory' to 'we have all but told you what just happened.'
"This is what I do. I drink and I know things."
approximately one billion nerds are going to get this on a shirt and I am first in line
posted by feckless fecal fear mongering at 9:09 AM on May 2, 2016 [11 favorites]
Points against: he straight up threatened to kill the High Sparrow in front of the body of his dead daughter.
Pretty sure I'm not the only person thinking "That's actually a step up for him."
posted by Brandon Blatcher at 9:10 AM on May 2, 2016 [10 favorites]
Pretty sure I'm not the only person thinking "That's actually a step up for him."
posted by Brandon Blatcher at 9:10 AM on May 2, 2016 [10 favorites]
Doesn't the small tasty treat walking away from hungry dragons pretty much prove Targaryen blood line?
No. Tyrion isn't a Targaryen. There's literally zero support, in text or in show, for this theory. The only 'evidence' is Tywin's "I cannot prove you aren't mine" which is less to do with Tywin believing that Mama Lannister played the field and much more to do with Tywin's sheer disbelief that he could have had a hand in creating something 'imperfect.'
Points against: he straight up threatened to kill the High Sparrow in front of the body of his dead daughter.
The Sparrow is an existential threat to either or both of the realm in general and the established order. I really liked the subtle reveal in the scene that shows the Sparrow is putting on the humility act, and doing it very cleverly. And Jaime damn Lannister, of all people, knows that a dead body is just meat and no longer of any use or importance or meaning.
posted by feckless fecal fear mongering at 9:13 AM on May 2, 2016 [6 favorites]
No. Tyrion isn't a Targaryen. There's literally zero support, in text or in show, for this theory. The only 'evidence' is Tywin's "I cannot prove you aren't mine" which is less to do with Tywin believing that Mama Lannister played the field and much more to do with Tywin's sheer disbelief that he could have had a hand in creating something 'imperfect.'
Points against: he straight up threatened to kill the High Sparrow in front of the body of his dead daughter.
The Sparrow is an existential threat to either or both of the realm in general and the established order. I really liked the subtle reveal in the scene that shows the Sparrow is putting on the humility act, and doing it very cleverly. And Jaime damn Lannister, of all people, knows that a dead body is just meat and no longer of any use or importance or meaning.
posted by feckless fecal fear mongering at 9:13 AM on May 2, 2016 [6 favorites]
"This is what I do. I drink and I know things."approximately one billion nerds are going to get this on a shirt and I am first in line
Take your pick, fffm.
posted by DirtyOldTown at 9:15 AM on May 2, 2016 [2 favorites]
Can someone point me to a primer on the Tyrion Targaryen theory? Like -- how was that supposed to have happened?
I haven't seen anything specific about Targaryen heritage. Although I have seen some general plot-structure-based speculation about Dany and two other characters from other houses becoming dragon-riders by the end, thus forming an unstoppable triumvirate to defeat the White Walkers. Both Jon Snow and Tyrion seem to be likely candidates, because of how the narrative seems disposed towards keeping them alive against all odds.
My theory is a bit simpler: That Tyrion was right about the dragons being intelligent, and maybe they had just been waiting for somebody to treat them with respect instead of like slavering beasts to be subdued.
posted by Strange Interlude at 9:15 AM on May 2, 2016 [3 favorites]
I haven't seen anything specific about Targaryen heritage. Although I have seen some general plot-structure-based speculation about Dany and two other characters from other houses becoming dragon-riders by the end, thus forming an unstoppable triumvirate to defeat the White Walkers. Both Jon Snow and Tyrion seem to be likely candidates, because of how the narrative seems disposed towards keeping them alive against all odds.
My theory is a bit simpler: That Tyrion was right about the dragons being intelligent, and maybe they had just been waiting for somebody to treat them with respect instead of like slavering beasts to be subdued.
posted by Strange Interlude at 9:15 AM on May 2, 2016 [3 favorites]
Pretty sure I'm not the only person thinking "That's actually a step up for him."
yes, absolutely. the lannisters may be immense shits but at least they're honest immense shits that don't hide their violent imperialism behind a facade of religious fanaticism.
posted by poffin boffin at 9:19 AM on May 2, 2016 [7 favorites]
yes, absolutely. the lannisters may be immense shits but at least they're honest immense shits that don't hide their violent imperialism behind a facade of religious fanaticism.
posted by poffin boffin at 9:19 AM on May 2, 2016 [7 favorites]
Can someone point me to a primer on the Tyrion Targaryen theory? Like -- how was that supposed to have happened?
idk if there are any links that wouldn't be secondhand spoilery for book canon in some way so maybe ask this in the book spoilers thread instead?
posted by poffin boffin at 9:22 AM on May 2, 2016
idk if there are any links that wouldn't be secondhand spoilery for book canon in some way so maybe ask this in the book spoilers thread instead?
posted by poffin boffin at 9:22 AM on May 2, 2016
I thought it would have been a better seen had she accompanied him. I was disappointed in this scene because it seemed so out of character. It felt like someone said "hey we need to get more Dinklage in here so put him in with the dragons." What was the point of asking her if she was familiar with the dragons if not to bring her? I would have loved to see him hiding behind her and doing all the talking while she cautiously eased off their chains. And would Varys really have gone with him? I don't think so. That whole scene seemed off. They did manage to create a good amount of tension despite the fact that no one would really have expected them to kill off Tyrion in this way.
He was establishing that dragons can distinguish friend from foe. Being chivalrous he didn't ask her to gamble her life along with his on what was a hunch. Seems entirely consistent with Tyrion's character of empathy mixed with self-directed calculated recklessness to me.
posted by srboisvert at 9:51 AM on May 2, 2016 [5 favorites]
He was establishing that dragons can distinguish friend from foe. Being chivalrous he didn't ask her to gamble her life along with his on what was a hunch. Seems entirely consistent with Tyrion's character of empathy mixed with self-directed calculated recklessness to me.
posted by srboisvert at 9:51 AM on May 2, 2016 [5 favorites]
Can someone point me to a primer on the Tyrion Targaryen theory? Like -- how was that supposed to have happened?
***Answer contains book-like material, but only theories, no spoilers***
So in the books there are several mentions of King Aerys "The Mad" II Targaryen (Daenerys and Viserys' father, who was betrayed by Tywin Lanninster and killed by Jaime "Kingslayer" Lannister), being infatuated with Tywin's betrothed/wife Joanna (mother of Jaime & Cersei and Tyrion). The idea is that she and Aerys had sex (consensual or otherwise) while Joanna and Tywin were in King's Landing during Tywin's stint as Aerys' Hand. I'm not sure if any sure if any of that made it into the show. Consulting a show-only wiki, it appears not.
The evidence is slim (and mostly in the books), but it includes things like Tywin's line about not being able to prove Tyrion's ancestry (probably an insult, not a statement of fact) as well as Tyrion's appearance - he has almost white hair (a Targaryen trait) and mis-matched eyes (a sign of mixed blood, which one would not normally expect the child of Lannister cousins to have). He also was obsessed with (and dreamed about) dragons as a child. There is also the theory that Tyrion's stature is a result of Tywin attempting to force Joanna to abort the pregnancy.
It also hinges on the "Three-Headed Dragon" prophecy - if Danerys, Jon and Tyrion are the three heads all had mothers who died giving birth to them (assuming R+L=J).
***Book references end***
posted by Rock Steady at 9:56 AM on May 2, 2016 [3 favorites]
***Answer contains book-like material, but only theories, no spoilers***
So in the books there are several mentions of King Aerys "The Mad" II Targaryen (Daenerys and Viserys' father, who was betrayed by Tywin Lanninster and killed by Jaime "Kingslayer" Lannister), being infatuated with Tywin's betrothed/wife Joanna (mother of Jaime & Cersei and Tyrion). The idea is that she and Aerys had sex (consensual or otherwise) while Joanna and Tywin were in King's Landing during Tywin's stint as Aerys' Hand. I'm not sure if any sure if any of that made it into the show. Consulting a show-only wiki, it appears not.
The evidence is slim (and mostly in the books), but it includes things like Tywin's line about not being able to prove Tyrion's ancestry (probably an insult, not a statement of fact) as well as Tyrion's appearance - he has almost white hair (a Targaryen trait) and mis-matched eyes (a sign of mixed blood, which one would not normally expect the child of Lannister cousins to have). He also was obsessed with (and dreamed about) dragons as a child. There is also the theory that Tyrion's stature is a result of Tywin attempting to force Joanna to abort the pregnancy.
It also hinges on the "Three-Headed Dragon" prophecy - if Danerys, Jon and Tyrion are the three heads all had mothers who died giving birth to them (assuming R+L=J).
***Book references end***
posted by Rock Steady at 9:56 AM on May 2, 2016 [3 favorites]
I like to think the haircut and trim wasn't really necessary, but that Melisandre was going to take her chance to clean him up while she had it.
posted by Navelgazer at 10:08 AM on May 2, 2016 [14 favorites]
posted by Navelgazer at 10:08 AM on May 2, 2016 [14 favorites]
Melisandre, ummm, he doesn't have any wounds there.
posted by drezdn at 10:24 AM on May 2, 2016 [8 favorites]
posted by drezdn at 10:24 AM on May 2, 2016 [8 favorites]
I'M JUST MAKING SURE ALL OF HIM WILL BE RESURRECTED OK
posted by feckless fecal fear mongering at 10:31 AM on May 2, 2016 [17 favorites]
posted by feckless fecal fear mongering at 10:31 AM on May 2, 2016 [17 favorites]
more like resErected amirite
posted by feckless fecal fear mongering at 10:31 AM on May 2, 2016 [8 favorites]
posted by feckless fecal fear mongering at 10:31 AM on May 2, 2016 [8 favorites]
Jon's loincloth was totally stuffed.
posted by The Whelk at 10:39 AM on May 2, 2016 [6 favorites]
posted by The Whelk at 10:39 AM on May 2, 2016 [6 favorites]
@ sparklemotion: This slate video, a recap of this very episode, suggests at the end that Tyrion is Tygarrean using show clips.
posted by about_time at 10:50 AM on May 2, 2016
posted by about_time at 10:50 AM on May 2, 2016
And wouldn't Varys know (or at least heard whispers) that Tyrion is Khaleesi's sister? Isn't that why he sent (or brought) him to her? Doesn't he talk to Tyrion about leading all the time?
posted by about_time at 10:56 AM on May 2, 2016 [2 favorites]
posted by about_time at 10:56 AM on May 2, 2016 [2 favorites]
Varys knows Tyrion is good at governance from Tyrion's tenure as Hand in King's Landing.
posted by Pope Guilty at 11:00 AM on May 2, 2016 [2 favorites]
posted by Pope Guilty at 11:00 AM on May 2, 2016 [2 favorites]
nitpick
Khaleesi is a title, not a name. It's more-or-less Dothraki for Queen. (Chieftan might be closer.)
posted by feckless fecal fear mongering at 11:00 AM on May 2, 2016 [2 favorites]
Khaleesi is a title, not a name. It's more-or-less Dothraki for Queen. (Chieftan might be closer.)
posted by feckless fecal fear mongering at 11:00 AM on May 2, 2016 [2 favorites]
cardboard: One episode, they should have Ramsay do something genuinely not evil. Not even nice: just not horrible. Maybe he could calculate harvest yields and manpower allocations without having someone threatened, tortured or executed. People around him wouldn't know what was going on and would be screaming on the inside every time Ramsay asked them an innocuous question.
I think he'd do that, at first purely to fuck with people as you say (just as he fucked with Theon by pretending to be sympathetic and a potential rescuer), but then realizing that he actually needs to not go totally ax crazy if he wants to keep on playing his sick little games, so he works up this shtick of pretending to be Roose Jr., just keeping the public parts of it down to the occasional public beheading. Eventually, though, he'll lose it and do some creepy snuff porn thing at a state banquet or something, so that will be that.
posted by Halloween Jack at 11:10 AM on May 2, 2016
I think he'd do that, at first purely to fuck with people as you say (just as he fucked with Theon by pretending to be sympathetic and a potential rescuer), but then realizing that he actually needs to not go totally ax crazy if he wants to keep on playing his sick little games, so he works up this shtick of pretending to be Roose Jr., just keeping the public parts of it down to the occasional public beheading. Eventually, though, he'll lose it and do some creepy snuff porn thing at a state banquet or something, so that will be that.
posted by Halloween Jack at 11:10 AM on May 2, 2016
@ sparklemotion: This slate video, a recap of this very episode, suggests at the end that Tyrion is Tygarrean using show clips.
Thanks, it was nice to see the in-show justification for it. I can see how it might have been something that GRRM was toying with, so he laid some foundation in the earlier books (which made it into the series), but given how the character has developed, it seems like a totally cheesy thing to actually go with.
Maybe what the dragons were sniffing on Tyrion was the greyscale, that he doesn't know yet that he contracted from Jorah (maybe greyscale is non-symptomatic in dwarfs?). Like -- I think there's more to the theory that greyscale is related to dragons than that Tyrion is.
Or, maybe the dragons are smart enough to understand what Tyrion was saying.
Or, maybe the dragons are just smart enough to not see a tiny human speaking in soft tones as a threat and figured that they'd see what he wanted before eating him. Especially since they haven't exactly been treated with kindness since before their mother chained them up. Like how an abused dog will sometimes be open to care from a strange human, especially if that human doesn't act in a way to abuse their trust.
posted by sparklemotion at 11:14 AM on May 2, 2016 [1 favorite]
Thanks, it was nice to see the in-show justification for it. I can see how it might have been something that GRRM was toying with, so he laid some foundation in the earlier books (which made it into the series), but given how the character has developed, it seems like a totally cheesy thing to actually go with.
Maybe what the dragons were sniffing on Tyrion was the greyscale, that he doesn't know yet that he contracted from Jorah (maybe greyscale is non-symptomatic in dwarfs?). Like -- I think there's more to the theory that greyscale is related to dragons than that Tyrion is.
Or, maybe the dragons are smart enough to understand what Tyrion was saying.
Or, maybe the dragons are just smart enough to not see a tiny human speaking in soft tones as a threat and figured that they'd see what he wanted before eating him. Especially since they haven't exactly been treated with kindness since before their mother chained them up. Like how an abused dog will sometimes be open to care from a strange human, especially if that human doesn't act in a way to abuse their trust.
posted by sparklemotion at 11:14 AM on May 2, 2016 [1 favorite]
One episode, they should have Ramsay do something genuinely not evil. Not even nice: just not horrible.
The odd thing about Ramsay for this episode was that he looked like he didn't want to kill his dad or stepmom and his brother, but thought he had too if he didn't want his power threatened. Roose has been fucking with him for so long about his position that Ramsay became totally paranoid and went really overboard. It's clear that Ramsay has been planning this coup for a while and making alliances with powerful Northern Houses.
So he's rash and batshit psycho, but he's smart and charismatic, which Roose was not. Still, I would have preferred the latter for his long game cunning, but Ramsay is ok as the villain you love to hate, even as you dislike the writers and directors for some of his antics.
posted by Brandon Blatcher at 12:03 PM on May 2, 2016 [1 favorite]
"This is what I do. I drink and I know things."
approximately one billion nerds are going to get this on a shirt and I am first in line
Seriously, I googled this morning just to find a meme gif of that moment and found so many T-shirt designs already on sale that I thought maybe Tyrion had used the line before in some earlier episode.
posted by dnash at 12:29 PM on May 2, 2016 [1 favorite]
approximately one billion nerds are going to get this on a shirt and I am first in line
Seriously, I googled this morning just to find a meme gif of that moment and found so many T-shirt designs already on sale that I thought maybe Tyrion had used the line before in some earlier episode.
posted by dnash at 12:29 PM on May 2, 2016 [1 favorite]
Navelgazer: I like to think the haircut and trim wasn't really necessary, but that Melisandre was going to take her chance to clean him up while she had it.
And I was imagining Mel griping about one of the only women in the place being left with the emotional labor of cleaning the corpse. "You guys had been stand around in his stench for how long, and not one of you had the decency to wipe off some of the blood? Davos, was this the real reason you called upon me?"
posted by filthy light thief at 12:29 PM on May 2, 2016 [4 favorites]
And I was imagining Mel griping about one of the only women in the place being left with the emotional labor of cleaning the corpse. "You guys had been stand around in his stench for how long, and not one of you had the decency to wipe off some of the blood? Davos, was this the real reason you called upon me?"
posted by filthy light thief at 12:29 PM on May 2, 2016 [4 favorites]
dnash: Seriously, I googled this morning just to find a meme gif of that moment and found so many T-shirt designs already on sale that I thought maybe Tyrion had used the line before in some earlier episode.
And here I've been daydreaming about all the good shirt, sticker and mini poster designs based on lines from Welcome to Night Vale. Clearly, I'm on the wrong bandwagon.
posted by filthy light thief at 12:32 PM on May 2, 2016
And here I've been daydreaming about all the good shirt, sticker and mini poster designs based on lines from Welcome to Night Vale. Clearly, I'm on the wrong bandwagon.
posted by filthy light thief at 12:32 PM on May 2, 2016
I thought maybe Tyrion had used the line before in some earlier episode.
I'm pretty sure it was in the season trailer.
posted by paper chromatographologist at 12:33 PM on May 2, 2016 [2 favorites]
I'm pretty sure it was in the season trailer.
posted by paper chromatographologist at 12:33 PM on May 2, 2016 [2 favorites]
It was.
posted by feckless fecal fear mongering at 12:33 PM on May 2, 2016
posted by feckless fecal fear mongering at 12:33 PM on May 2, 2016
approximately one billion nerds are going to get this on a shirt and I am first in line
Meh, it needs to go a coffee and/or tea mug.
posted by Brandon Blatcher at 12:34 PM on May 2, 2016 [1 favorite]
Meh, it needs to go a coffee and/or tea mug.
posted by Brandon Blatcher at 12:34 PM on May 2, 2016 [1 favorite]
Seriously, I googled this morning just to find a meme gif of that moment and found so many T-shirt designs already on sale that I thought maybe Tyrion had used the line before in some earlier episode.
The line was in Trailer #2 (At 1:33) that was released April 11th.
I thought I'd seen it before, but I doesn't seem to be in Trailer #1 or the teasers that I checked.
posted by sparklemotion at 12:36 PM on May 2, 2016
The line was in Trailer #2 (At 1:33) that was released April 11th.
I thought I'd seen it before, but I doesn't seem to be in Trailer #1 or the teasers that I checked.
posted by sparklemotion at 12:36 PM on May 2, 2016
No, a mug for the quaffing of Arbor gold
posted by feckless fecal fear mongering at 12:36 PM on May 2, 2016
posted by feckless fecal fear mongering at 12:36 PM on May 2, 2016
"Every other example of resurrection magic has resulted in the character being broken in some way"
Like maybe he doesn't recognize Sansa. Or for some other reason related to being screwed up by his resurrection, isn't able to help Sansa if she gets to the Wall. (Not a prediction, just a thought.)
Can the resurrected reproduce?
posted by Eyebrows McGee at 12:37 PM on May 2, 2016 [1 favorite]
Like maybe he doesn't recognize Sansa. Or for some other reason related to being screwed up by his resurrection, isn't able to help Sansa if she gets to the Wall. (Not a prediction, just a thought.)
Can the resurrected reproduce?
posted by Eyebrows McGee at 12:37 PM on May 2, 2016 [1 favorite]
Can the resurrected reproduce?
Damn straight they can, with hair like that.
posted by Brandon Blatcher at 12:39 PM on May 2, 2016 [9 favorites]
Damn straight they can, with hair like that.
posted by Brandon Blatcher at 12:39 PM on May 2, 2016 [9 favorites]
a mug like so
(My sister didn't know I'm much more Team Stark than Team Lannister, alas)
posted by feckless fecal fear mongering at 12:39 PM on May 2, 2016
(My sister didn't know I'm much more Team Stark than Team Lannister, alas)
posted by feckless fecal fear mongering at 12:39 PM on May 2, 2016
On Tommen:
Is being under Cersei's wing really the worst thing for him (and King's Landing), right at the moment?
Cersei is terrible, but it seems to me that the Faith Militant are worse. And Tommen needs to get the strength to take them on from someone. I guess, in theory, trusting Cersei to take out a force that she created may be unwise, but given the High Sparrow's treatment of her, I don't think she'll have a problem crushing them.
Jaime would obviously be a better choice, but he can't really step into that role while Cersei is still around, and if Tommen is in Cersei's orbit, then he'll get some Jaime influence.
Olenna Tyrell is just too far removed from Tommen to make the difference (and her strength is in the kind of politicking that won't really help with the FM problem). Also: where is she? If Margaery gets out of prison, she could be a good influence, but let's be honest, Margaery is not getting out without Cersei's help now.
So, Tommen takes on the Faith Militant (backed by Cersei and Jaime), and hopefully, in doing so, gains the confidence to deal with the idiocy that is on his way from Dorne. Maybe freeing Margaery helps mend things with Highgarden enough that they don't have to worry about insta-famine (though, to be honest, I don't have a ton of faith in Margaery getting out alive --there's more plot opportunity with The Reach having reason to revolt). The fact that he's more Jaime than Cersei makes him more likely to deal reasonably with the north when the whole ice zombies problem becomes clearer?
It was mentioned above that maybe Cersei is willing to sacrifice Tommen. But where would that leave her? She is out of "Baratheon" heirs. Hell, there aren't even all that many Lannisters left. Neither she nor Jaime have a claim to the throne, unless they want an open coup. Like seriously, Tommen dying would leave Gendry as the only one with a current claim to the Iron Throne. Tommen is her only way to hold on to power -- she'll do what ever she can to keep him in position.
posted by sparklemotion at 1:57 PM on May 2, 2016 [2 favorites]
Is being under Cersei's wing really the worst thing for him (and King's Landing), right at the moment?
Cersei is terrible, but it seems to me that the Faith Militant are worse. And Tommen needs to get the strength to take them on from someone. I guess, in theory, trusting Cersei to take out a force that she created may be unwise, but given the High Sparrow's treatment of her, I don't think she'll have a problem crushing them.
Jaime would obviously be a better choice, but he can't really step into that role while Cersei is still around, and if Tommen is in Cersei's orbit, then he'll get some Jaime influence.
Olenna Tyrell is just too far removed from Tommen to make the difference (and her strength is in the kind of politicking that won't really help with the FM problem). Also: where is she? If Margaery gets out of prison, she could be a good influence, but let's be honest, Margaery is not getting out without Cersei's help now.
So, Tommen takes on the Faith Militant (backed by Cersei and Jaime), and hopefully, in doing so, gains the confidence to deal with the idiocy that is on his way from Dorne. Maybe freeing Margaery helps mend things with Highgarden enough that they don't have to worry about insta-famine (though, to be honest, I don't have a ton of faith in Margaery getting out alive --there's more plot opportunity with The Reach having reason to revolt). The fact that he's more Jaime than Cersei makes him more likely to deal reasonably with the north when the whole ice zombies problem becomes clearer?
It was mentioned above that maybe Cersei is willing to sacrifice Tommen. But where would that leave her? She is out of "Baratheon" heirs. Hell, there aren't even all that many Lannisters left. Neither she nor Jaime have a claim to the throne, unless they want an open coup. Like seriously, Tommen dying would leave Gendry as the only one with a current claim to the Iron Throne. Tommen is her only way to hold on to power -- she'll do what ever she can to keep him in position.
posted by sparklemotion at 1:57 PM on May 2, 2016 [2 favorites]
Is being under Cersei's wing really the worst thing for him
Yes he is a sweet summer child who plays with kittens and with Myrcella gone is like, the only decent human being left on the show. (Brienne comes second.)
posted by feckless fecal fear mongering at 2:01 PM on May 2, 2016 [4 favorites]
Yes he is a sweet summer child who plays with kittens and with Myrcella gone is like, the only decent human being left on the show. (Brienne comes second.)
posted by feckless fecal fear mongering at 2:01 PM on May 2, 2016 [4 favorites]
Yeah, but right now he's showing his weakness in a way that Joffrey at least had a sympathetic (and competent) small council to help him hide.
Would it be better to let the Faith Militant topple the Iron Throne? Or Ellaria show up with another kiss? He needs help and has no one around to help him, except his mother, who at least loves him.
posted by sparklemotion at 2:09 PM on May 2, 2016
Would it be better to let the Faith Militant topple the Iron Throne? Or Ellaria show up with another kiss? He needs help and has no one around to help him, except his mother, who at least loves him.
posted by sparklemotion at 2:09 PM on May 2, 2016
What Cersei feels for her children is not 'love' in any definition with which I am familiar.
posted by feckless fecal fear mongering at 2:11 PM on May 2, 2016 [1 favorite]
posted by feckless fecal fear mongering at 2:11 PM on May 2, 2016 [1 favorite]
Would it be better to let the Faith Militant topple the Iron Throne?
I think Westeros would be better off with anarchy than Cersei pulling Tommen's strings on the Iron Throne.
posted by Rock Steady at 2:25 PM on May 2, 2016 [1 favorite]
I think Westeros would be better off with anarchy than Cersei pulling Tommen's strings on the Iron Throne.
posted by Rock Steady at 2:25 PM on May 2, 2016 [1 favorite]
What Cersei feels for her children is not 'love' in any definition with which I am familiar.
She wants to control them, sure, but primarily she does want to keep them safe. Even the one that she knew was evil.
Love no one but your children,Cersei's freak out over Myrcella's marriage, etc.
Of course, that love makes her do stupid ass things that lead to her children being put into danger (Anger over Joffrey --> Accusation of Tyrion --> Trial by Combat --> Oberyn's Death --> Ellaria freak out).
I'm also willing to believe that at least part of why she didn't want to take Eddard's bargain is because she didn't believe that there would be a way for her and her children to be safe in a world where King Robert Baratheon knew that he had been cuckolded, regardless of what Ned Stark promised.
posted by sparklemotion at 2:30 PM on May 2, 2016 [1 favorite]
She wants to control them, sure, but primarily she does want to keep them safe. Even the one that she knew was evil.
Love no one but your children,Cersei's freak out over Myrcella's marriage, etc.
Of course, that love makes her do stupid ass things that lead to her children being put into danger (Anger over Joffrey --> Accusation of Tyrion --> Trial by Combat --> Oberyn's Death --> Ellaria freak out).
I'm also willing to believe that at least part of why she didn't want to take Eddard's bargain is because she didn't believe that there would be a way for her and her children to be safe in a world where King Robert Baratheon knew that he had been cuckolded, regardless of what Ned Stark promised.
posted by sparklemotion at 2:30 PM on May 2, 2016 [1 favorite]
Cersei is terrible, but it seems to me that the Faith Militant are worse. And Tommen needs to get the strength to take them on from someone. I guess, in theory, trusting Cersei to take out a force that she created may be unwise, but given the High Sparrow's treatment of her, I don't think she'll have a problem crushing them.
I'm not so sure about that. Or, rather, it depends on your perspective. The show has forgotten it, but the Faith Militant (despite their obvious curtailment of personal freedoms) is an organization that's mainly focused on the smallfolk, stability, and moral order. The scenes of King's Landing before Sansa and Tyrion absconded show how terrible life is for the average man, how both Robert and Joffrey bled the throne dry, and how they had no voice in court amid all of the scheming and backstabbing. To a modern eye, the Faith Militant is obviously terrible. We also have our POV from the Lannisters (who are doing a bit of a heel turn over the past two seasons), and of course they're going to hate people who want their power. But, if you look at it from the perspective of Jon and Jeyne Gin Alley, the FM has to be pretty appealing an alternative.
I'm unsure of what Cersei's endgame is. Maybe she relents a bit, and actually plays politics instead of simply trying to crush her enemies. Having been shamed (SHAME!) publically could even help, since it would be revenge in the eyes of the mob who used to hate her. However, the presence of her zombie knight indicates otherwise. I think she's going to double down and become more of a tyrant than ever before. Logically that indicates that her days are numbered (trying to hold down a popular uprising with a minority force in a hostile city seems difficult), but she has plot armor, so I guess we'll see.
posted by codacorolla at 2:50 PM on May 2, 2016 [3 favorites]
I'm not so sure about that. Or, rather, it depends on your perspective. The show has forgotten it, but the Faith Militant (despite their obvious curtailment of personal freedoms) is an organization that's mainly focused on the smallfolk, stability, and moral order. The scenes of King's Landing before Sansa and Tyrion absconded show how terrible life is for the average man, how both Robert and Joffrey bled the throne dry, and how they had no voice in court amid all of the scheming and backstabbing. To a modern eye, the Faith Militant is obviously terrible. We also have our POV from the Lannisters (who are doing a bit of a heel turn over the past two seasons), and of course they're going to hate people who want their power. But, if you look at it from the perspective of Jon and Jeyne Gin Alley, the FM has to be pretty appealing an alternative.
I'm unsure of what Cersei's endgame is. Maybe she relents a bit, and actually plays politics instead of simply trying to crush her enemies. Having been shamed (SHAME!) publically could even help, since it would be revenge in the eyes of the mob who used to hate her. However, the presence of her zombie knight indicates otherwise. I think she's going to double down and become more of a tyrant than ever before. Logically that indicates that her days are numbered (trying to hold down a popular uprising with a minority force in a hostile city seems difficult), but she has plot armor, so I guess we'll see.
posted by codacorolla at 2:50 PM on May 2, 2016 [3 favorites]
I'm unsure of what Cersei's endgame is.
Cersei's endgame is and always will be with her on top, in power, either directly or pulling someone's strings.
posted by Brandon Blatcher at 3:04 PM on May 2, 2016
Cersei's endgame is and always will be with her on top, in power, either directly or pulling someone's strings.
posted by Brandon Blatcher at 3:04 PM on May 2, 2016
I think that the scene or two we got of the commoners slagging Cersei and the Frankenmoutain crushing skulls are basically meant to be a visual manifestation of what's going on in her head right now. He's like her id made flesh and sent to walk the streets. Cersei wants revenge and believes she and her children are doomed. It's not going to end well. Don't forget her pride. She almost took out Tommen during Blackwater, rather than let Stannis take them. I think we'll see that scene repeated in some fashion, with Jaime playing the role of Tywin, but unlike his father, arriving too late.
posted by Diablevert at 3:06 PM on May 2, 2016 [5 favorites]
posted by Diablevert at 3:06 PM on May 2, 2016 [5 favorites]
By endgame I don't mean Cersei's plan, which is obvious, but rather the arc that the writers have in mind for her. I agree, I don't think it's going to end well for her, but they've also been making the Lannisters more sympathetic over the past two seasons, so the possibility exists.
posted by codacorolla at 3:17 PM on May 2, 2016 [2 favorites]
posted by codacorolla at 3:17 PM on May 2, 2016 [2 favorites]
Like seriously, Tommen dying would leave Gendry as the only one with a current claim to the Iron Throne. Tommen is her only way to hold on to power -- she'll do what ever she can to keep him in position.
Technically, Gendry's claim is better than Tommen's anyway. But AFAIK there's only two people in Westeros who know that, and they're at Castle Black right now.
posted by Pope Guilty at 3:25 PM on May 2, 2016 [2 favorites]
Technically, Gendry's claim is better than Tommen's anyway. But AFAIK there's only two people in Westeros who know that, and they're at Castle Black right now.
posted by Pope Guilty at 3:25 PM on May 2, 2016 [2 favorites]
#occupykingslanding is definitely starting to look like an interesting threat for this season, too
Mostly I'm just so happy that things are actually happening this season after last year's fairly weak run.
posted by DoctorFedora at 3:38 PM on May 2, 2016
Mostly I'm just so happy that things are actually happening this season after last year's fairly weak run.
posted by DoctorFedora at 3:38 PM on May 2, 2016
Don't forget her pride. She almost took out Tommen during Blackwater, rather than let Stannis take them.
Because she knows what happens to the children of the losing houses in battles like that. Let alone bastard children. She wanted to give him a peaceful, fear-free death, instead of letting him be hacked to pieces by Stannis' men. If I remember correctly, she tried to get enough poison for both of them but Pycelle only had so much (I can't find the clip now). It was obviously an act driven out of love.
Like -- I'm not saying that her love for her children is healthy, or even particularly helpful to them, in and of itself. I'm just saying that Tommen needs her now. I'll admit to being swayed by the idea that maybe Westeros as a whole would be better off with an empty Iron Throne than with a Cersei-puppet in charge.
posted by sparklemotion at 3:40 PM on May 2, 2016 [4 favorites]
Because she knows what happens to the children of the losing houses in battles like that. Let alone bastard children. She wanted to give him a peaceful, fear-free death, instead of letting him be hacked to pieces by Stannis' men. If I remember correctly, she tried to get enough poison for both of them but Pycelle only had so much (I can't find the clip now). It was obviously an act driven out of love.
Like -- I'm not saying that her love for her children is healthy, or even particularly helpful to them, in and of itself. I'm just saying that Tommen needs her now. I'll admit to being swayed by the idea that maybe Westeros as a whole would be better off with an empty Iron Throne than with a Cersei-puppet in charge.
posted by sparklemotion at 3:40 PM on May 2, 2016 [4 favorites]
That was only Cersei's (perhaps drink-fueled) paranoia, though. Stannis, above all else, was an honourable man in the mould of e.g. Ned Stark--who took Theon Greyjoy as a prisoner/ward/hostage after the Ironborn Revolt.
posted by feckless fecal fear mongering at 3:54 PM on May 2, 2016 [1 favorite]
posted by feckless fecal fear mongering at 3:54 PM on May 2, 2016 [1 favorite]
I don't think it's going to end well for her, but they've also been making the Lannisters more sympathetic over the past two seasons, so the possibility exists.
To me it seems like the Lannisters have to be cleared out of King's Landing to make room for whoever's going to unify the kingdoms against the white walkers. We did get that scene in Dany's vision way back in the day of her walking into a red keep with the roof blown off, covered in snow. If I have to lay my chips down, it's on the tragic end for them, and Cersei's the likely mechanism. In her reaction to Myrcella's death it's made clear that she thinks she and her children are doomed, now; I think, Macbeth style, she'll seal their fates in her quest for vengeance. I mention the Blackwater scene not because I don't think she loves her kids, but because it shows she'd rather take them out herself than let them fall to her enemies, if she thinks that's what's in store. She will think it mercy, and she will be wrong.
posted by Diablevert at 4:05 PM on May 2, 2016 [4 favorites]
To me it seems like the Lannisters have to be cleared out of King's Landing to make room for whoever's going to unify the kingdoms against the white walkers. We did get that scene in Dany's vision way back in the day of her walking into a red keep with the roof blown off, covered in snow. If I have to lay my chips down, it's on the tragic end for them, and Cersei's the likely mechanism. In her reaction to Myrcella's death it's made clear that she thinks she and her children are doomed, now; I think, Macbeth style, she'll seal their fates in her quest for vengeance. I mention the Blackwater scene not because I don't think she loves her kids, but because it shows she'd rather take them out herself than let them fall to her enemies, if she thinks that's what's in store. She will think it mercy, and she will be wrong.
posted by Diablevert at 4:05 PM on May 2, 2016 [4 favorites]
Stannis, above all else, was an honourable man in the mould of e.g. Ned Stark--who took Theon Greyjoy as a prisoner/ward/hostage after the Ironborn Revolt.
But did Cersei know that? She knew Robert (who was a brute). She knew what happened to Rhaegar's children. Maybe she interacted with Renly enough to know that not all the Baratheon boys were so supportive of child murder, but I think it's reasonable for her not to take that risk.
In her reaction to Myrcella's death it's made clear that she thinks she and her children are doomed, now; I think, Macbeth style, she'll seal their fates in her quest for vengeance. I mention the Blackwater scene not because I don't think she loves her kids, but because it shows she'd rather take them out herself than let them fall to her enemies, if she thinks that's what's in store. She will think it mercy, and she will be wrong.
I think that this is most likely. Eventually, things are going to come to a head and Cersei won't be able to keep control and assuming that Tommen won't survive anyways, she'll try to cause (or fail to prevent) his death. Maybe it will be a murder-suicide where she goes too -- or maybe she'll try to use his death as a feint so she can strike whoever she thinks deserves it the most.
But -- Cersei isn't there yet. And what Tommen learns from Cersei, right now, might just help him survive her final lashing out. Either way, that strike at Tommen is going to be the thing that drives Jaime to kill her when he sees how much like the Mad King she truly is.
posted by sparklemotion at 4:17 PM on May 2, 2016 [3 favorites]
But did Cersei know that? She knew Robert (who was a brute). She knew what happened to Rhaegar's children. Maybe she interacted with Renly enough to know that not all the Baratheon boys were so supportive of child murder, but I think it's reasonable for her not to take that risk.
In her reaction to Myrcella's death it's made clear that she thinks she and her children are doomed, now; I think, Macbeth style, she'll seal their fates in her quest for vengeance. I mention the Blackwater scene not because I don't think she loves her kids, but because it shows she'd rather take them out herself than let them fall to her enemies, if she thinks that's what's in store. She will think it mercy, and she will be wrong.
I think that this is most likely. Eventually, things are going to come to a head and Cersei won't be able to keep control and assuming that Tommen won't survive anyways, she'll try to cause (or fail to prevent) his death. Maybe it will be a murder-suicide where she goes too -- or maybe she'll try to use his death as a feint so she can strike whoever she thinks deserves it the most.
But -- Cersei isn't there yet. And what Tommen learns from Cersei, right now, might just help him survive her final lashing out. Either way, that strike at Tommen is going to be the thing that drives Jaime to kill her when he sees how much like the Mad King she truly is.
posted by sparklemotion at 4:17 PM on May 2, 2016 [3 favorites]
Either way, that strike at Tommen is going to be the thing that drives Jaime to kill her when he sees how much like the Mad King she truly is.
gasp
posted by feckless fecal fear mongering at 4:21 PM on May 2, 2016 [10 favorites]
gasp
posted by feckless fecal fear mongering at 4:21 PM on May 2, 2016 [10 favorites]
Search your feelings, you know it to be true.
posted by sparklemotion at 4:31 PM on May 2, 2016 [6 favorites]
posted by sparklemotion at 4:31 PM on May 2, 2016 [6 favorites]
Stannis, above all else, was an honourable man in the mould of e.g. Ned Stark
HE SET HIS ONLY CHILD ON FIRE
posted by poffin boffin at 4:34 PM on May 2, 2016 [33 favorites]
HE SET HIS ONLY CHILD ON FIRE
posted by poffin boffin at 4:34 PM on May 2, 2016 [33 favorites]
BECAUSE A NAKED LADY TOLD HIM TO
posted by poffin boffin at 4:34 PM on May 2, 2016 [23 favorites]
posted by poffin boffin at 4:34 PM on May 2, 2016 [23 favorites]
You guys you guys you guys I swear this just happened:
After dinner, my husband mentions that he couldn't remember his bank PIN earlier today. I said, "I'm pretty sure it's blah blah blah." He goes, "Yeah, that sounds right, I thought you would know." I had a glass of wine in my hand, so of course I get to say..."That's what I do. I drink wine, and I know things."
YAASSSSS
posted by Bunny Boneyology at 4:44 PM on May 2, 2016 [34 favorites]
After dinner, my husband mentions that he couldn't remember his bank PIN earlier today. I said, "I'm pretty sure it's blah blah blah." He goes, "Yeah, that sounds right, I thought you would know." I had a glass of wine in my hand, so of course I get to say..."That's what I do. I drink wine, and I know things."
YAASSSSS
posted by Bunny Boneyology at 4:44 PM on May 2, 2016 [34 favorites]
Cersi's first move will probably be to challenge the Faith in some small way and see what happens. How they reapond determines her next move. She'll also be trying to make Tommem stronger.
posted by Brandon Blatcher at 4:56 PM on May 2, 2016 [1 favorite]
posted by Brandon Blatcher at 4:56 PM on May 2, 2016 [1 favorite]
HE SET HIS ONLY CHILD ON FIRE
Was. Blackwater was some time ago.
posted by feckless fecal fear mongering at 5:09 PM on May 2, 2016
Shireen was burned at the end of season five.
posted by Pope Guilty at 6:08 PM on May 2, 2016 [2 favorites]
posted by Pope Guilty at 6:08 PM on May 2, 2016 [2 favorites]
Too soon!
posted by Brandon Blatcher at 6:39 PM on May 2, 2016 [2 favorites]
posted by Brandon Blatcher at 6:39 PM on May 2, 2016 [2 favorites]
I believe fffm is saying that, at the time of Blackwater, when Cersei was ready to kill Tommen for fear of what Stannis would do to him, Stannis was not at all the sort of person who would have harmed the child Tommen.
posted by Navelgazer at 8:03 PM on May 2, 2016 [4 favorites]
posted by Navelgazer at 8:03 PM on May 2, 2016 [4 favorites]
There's no evidence that I can recall that Cersei thinks strategically. Therefore she's not a player but a pawn or maybe shes a queen in a chess game, powerful but not the focus of the game.
posted by rdr at 8:33 PM on May 2, 2016 [3 favorites]
posted by rdr at 8:33 PM on May 2, 2016 [3 favorites]
When the Red Woman did her stuff and it wasn't working, they should've had Emma Watson make a cameo by poking her head in and saying
"Wingardium Leviosa, not leviosar!"posted by blueberry at 9:00 PM on May 2, 2016 [10 favorites]
HE SET HIS ONLY CHILD ON FIRE
Sing Rickety-tickety-tin
He set his only child on fire
And as the smoke and flames grew higher
He prayed the lady in red was no liar
Like Chris De Burgh's fantasy twin
posted by Sparx at 10:08 PM on May 2, 2016 [3 favorites]
Sing Rickety-tickety-tin
He set his only child on fire
And as the smoke and flames grew higher
He prayed the lady in red was no liar
Like Chris De Burgh's fantasy twin
posted by Sparx at 10:08 PM on May 2, 2016 [3 favorites]
So, the dragons are off the leash, but that door looks too small for them to get out of.
The dragons are smaller when Daenerys leads them into the catacombs by that door at the top of the stairs at 4:40 in this scene but even so I think they'd have no trouble getting out the door now. When they fold their wings they're quite snakelike, no?
Doesn't the small tasty treat walking away from hungry dragons pretty much prove Targaryen blood line?
It just proves that Tyrion was right when he suggested earlier that dragons are smart enough to tell the difference between friends and enemies.
posted by mediareport at 5:38 AM on May 3, 2016 [4 favorites]
The dragons are smaller when Daenerys leads them into the catacombs by that door at the top of the stairs at 4:40 in this scene but even so I think they'd have no trouble getting out the door now. When they fold their wings they're quite snakelike, no?
Doesn't the small tasty treat walking away from hungry dragons pretty much prove Targaryen blood line?
It just proves that Tyrion was right when he suggested earlier that dragons are smart enough to tell the difference between friends and enemies.
posted by mediareport at 5:38 AM on May 3, 2016 [4 favorites]
I really liked the subtle reveal in the scene that shows the Sparrow is putting on the humility act, and doing it very cleverly
I'm intrigued - what do you mean?
posted by corb at 6:48 AM on May 3, 2016
I'm intrigued - what do you mean?
posted by corb at 6:48 AM on May 3, 2016
The sparrow gave Jamie a long scornful look, from head to toe. It was a brilliant piece of acting. Not many could get away with disrespecting Jamie so openly.
posted by Brandon Blatcher at 7:07 AM on May 3, 2016 [3 favorites]
posted by Brandon Blatcher at 7:07 AM on May 3, 2016 [3 favorites]
He also pointedly spot of toppling an empire, and Jamies look of understanding was great.
posted by Brandon Blatcher at 7:08 AM on May 3, 2016 [2 favorites]
posted by Brandon Blatcher at 7:08 AM on May 3, 2016 [2 favorites]
Despite having seen set photos depicting how they film the dragon scenes (it's really goofy and involves a stick with a green blob-shaped bundle on the end), or maybe because of that, I was really impressed with Peter Dinklage's acting in the scene with the dragons.
I loved the scene but the one thing that took me completely out of it was that Tyrion was able to one hand the pins out of the collars without any effort. I'm not really an expert on dragon collars, but I have enough experience with pulling door hinge pins to know that anything that loose would have fallen out on its own months ago. Someone should bring a bit more verisimilitude to their dragon cgi.
posted by rtimmel at 8:49 AM on May 3, 2016 [2 favorites]
I loved the scene but the one thing that took me completely out of it was that Tyrion was able to one hand the pins out of the collars without any effort. I'm not really an expert on dragon collars, but I have enough experience with pulling door hinge pins to know that anything that loose would have fallen out on its own months ago. Someone should bring a bit more verisimilitude to their dragon cgi.
posted by rtimmel at 8:49 AM on May 3, 2016 [2 favorites]
I think I thought you can both be humble for yourself, and also topple empires through faith and believing it's best. You guys think he's in it for himself?
posted by corb at 8:52 AM on May 3, 2016 [1 favorite]
posted by corb at 8:52 AM on May 3, 2016 [1 favorite]
You guys think he's in it for himself?
Yes. He's playing the game, just like the rest of them.
posted by sparklemotion at 9:02 AM on May 3, 2016 [5 favorites]
Yes. He's playing the game, just like the rest of them.
posted by sparklemotion at 9:02 AM on May 3, 2016 [5 favorites]
I think the Sparrow is the 'I'm 100 times more humble than thou art' type.
posted by bq at 9:12 AM on May 3, 2016 [4 favorites]
posted by bq at 9:12 AM on May 3, 2016 [4 favorites]
Yeah, exactly. He's clearly skilled at using power, but since his arsenal is so different than most of the other players, they're getting caught off guard by it.
posted by rmd1023 at 9:19 AM on May 3, 2016 [7 favorites]
posted by rmd1023 at 9:19 AM on May 3, 2016 [7 favorites]
Yeah, he's basically the dude that brought a gun to a knife fight and they have no idea wtf to do about it.
posted by feckless fecal fear mongering at 9:24 AM on May 3, 2016 [6 favorites]
posted by feckless fecal fear mongering at 9:24 AM on May 3, 2016 [6 favorites]
Did I miss something about the Sparrow's relationship with the King's Guard, like for instance there is a lot of secret sympathies for them in the Guard. The High Sparrow showing up at the wake was one thing, but a large group of armed men is another. I would assume that the bodies of the royal family would be guarded.
posted by rtimmel at 9:28 AM on May 3, 2016 [1 favorite]
posted by rtimmel at 9:28 AM on May 3, 2016 [1 favorite]
Did I miss something about the Sparrow's relationship with the King's Guard, like for instance there is a lot of secret sympathies for them in the Guard.
It wouldn't surprise me if there were -- the Faith of the Seven is the official religion of the Seven Kingdoms, and knights of the king's guard are likely quite devout folks in general.
The High Sparrow showing up at the wake was one thing, but a large group of armed men is another. I would assume that the bodies of the royal family would be guarded.
Myrcella's body is at the Sept of Baelor -- it makes sense that the Faith Militant would be in charge of security there. Even if the King's Guard has it surrounded from the outside -- they've got all their cells and catacombs and whatnot underneath that the King's Guard wouldn't be able to fully clear.
posted by sparklemotion at 9:34 AM on May 3, 2016 [2 favorites]
It wouldn't surprise me if there were -- the Faith of the Seven is the official religion of the Seven Kingdoms, and knights of the king's guard are likely quite devout folks in general.
The High Sparrow showing up at the wake was one thing, but a large group of armed men is another. I would assume that the bodies of the royal family would be guarded.
Myrcella's body is at the Sept of Baelor -- it makes sense that the Faith Militant would be in charge of security there. Even if the King's Guard has it surrounded from the outside -- they've got all their cells and catacombs and whatnot underneath that the King's Guard wouldn't be able to fully clear.
posted by sparklemotion at 9:34 AM on May 3, 2016 [2 favorites]
I think the sparrow is honest but a zealot. A dangerous true believer, maybe the only among the faith of the seven we've ever met. I don't think it's an act so much as he's just incredibly different than the people he's dealing with. I think he, like many others, thinks that power will let him do what needs to be done. I think he's also smarter than most other pious and humble people we've met. He knows the brutality of power and the people he's dealing with, hence the guards. Jamie is the kind of man who would kill him in the high Sept, he knows this and acts accordingly.
There are several things he's done that aren't necessarily the best political moves. Angering the Tyrels, littler-finger and the Lannissters only makes sense as a zealot carrying out an agenda. A schemer bent only on power could have easily folded the Tyrels into their cause and roped Tommen in as well.
posted by French Fry at 9:38 AM on May 3, 2016 [4 favorites]
There are several things he's done that aren't necessarily the best political moves. Angering the Tyrels, littler-finger and the Lannissters only makes sense as a zealot carrying out an agenda. A schemer bent only on power could have easily folded the Tyrels into their cause and roped Tommen in as well.
posted by French Fry at 9:38 AM on May 3, 2016 [4 favorites]
There are only seven members of the Kingsguard.
posted by feckless fecal fear mongering at 9:48 AM on May 3, 2016
posted by feckless fecal fear mongering at 9:48 AM on May 3, 2016
I agree with most of the thinking above. I think if the Sparrow is absolutely a manipulator using religions as a tool. If he had been born a Lannister, he'd be using those tools, manipulating money and political power. But he was born poor and worked with what he had available. Zealots are his most convenient path to power.
That said, I think it's an intrinsic part of his personality that he's the type who'll go to his death unwilling to drop the mask and admit the con.
posted by DirtyOldTown at 9:52 AM on May 3, 2016 [2 favorites]
That said, I think it's an intrinsic part of his personality that he's the type who'll go to his death unwilling to drop the mask and admit the con.
posted by DirtyOldTown at 9:52 AM on May 3, 2016 [2 favorites]
To wit:
Jaime Lannister, Lord Commander (in the sept)
Ser Robert Strong, the huge dude, guarding Cersei
Meryn Trant, dead in a brothel in Braavos, they probably don't know yet
Ser Loras Tyrell, imprisoned
Can't remember who the other three are.
posted by feckless fecal fear mongering at 9:52 AM on May 3, 2016
Jaime Lannister, Lord Commander (in the sept)
Ser Robert Strong, the huge dude, guarding Cersei
Meryn Trant, dead in a brothel in Braavos, they probably don't know yet
Ser Loras Tyrell, imprisoned
Can't remember who the other three are.
posted by feckless fecal fear mongering at 9:52 AM on May 3, 2016
There are only seven members of the Kingsguard.
Indeed -- I was confusing the Kingsguard with the City Watch (Gold Cloaks), I think? Who was it that confronted Cersei and The Mountain at the Red Keep?
posted by sparklemotion at 9:54 AM on May 3, 2016
Indeed -- I was confusing the Kingsguard with the City Watch (Gold Cloaks), I think? Who was it that confronted Cersei and The Mountain at the Red Keep?
posted by sparklemotion at 9:54 AM on May 3, 2016
Those were Lannister men, palace guards. (red and gold armor)
posted by French Fry at 9:57 AM on May 3, 2016 [2 favorites]
posted by French Fry at 9:57 AM on May 3, 2016 [2 favorites]
I loved the scene but the one thing that took me completely out of it was that Tyrion was able to one hand the pins out of the collars without any effort.
And yet that the "more intelligent than some men" dragons had not been able to work out how to pull the pins themselves.
(Also, the collars seem to have grown along with the dragons; Dany was able to lift the collars+chains when she put them on. I suppose *handwave* she probably popped down there every few weeks to move them up to the next size.)
posted by We had a deal, Kyle at 11:24 AM on May 3, 2016 [3 favorites]
And yet that the "more intelligent than some men" dragons had not been able to work out how to pull the pins themselves.
(Also, the collars seem to have grown along with the dragons; Dany was able to lift the collars+chains when she put them on. I suppose *handwave* she probably popped down there every few weeks to move them up to the next size.)
posted by We had a deal, Kyle at 11:24 AM on May 3, 2016 [3 favorites]
Tyrion definitely had the sweetest line in the entire series run. "It didn't even have to be a big dragon. It could be little, like me." The way Dinklage said it, it was like he really went back in his mind to being a little Tyrion toddler, asking for a present. It just broke my cold, dead heart.
posted by Saxon Kane at 11:34 AM on May 3, 2016 [28 favorites]
posted by Saxon Kane at 11:34 AM on May 3, 2016 [28 favorites]
My chief wish for the episode was that the Tyrion and Jon scenes switched places.
The Tyrion scene had way more impact and drama than the Jon scene. It was the climax of the episode.
posted by French Fry at 11:37 AM on May 3, 2016 [5 favorites]
The Tyrion scene had way more impact and drama than the Jon scene. It was the climax of the episode.
posted by French Fry at 11:37 AM on May 3, 2016 [5 favorites]
I also thought Ramsay was the one who got stabbed, and was disappointed he wasn't. I hate that whole storyline; it's why I stopped reading the books.
posted by The corpse in the library at 2:40 PM on May 3, 2016 [5 favorites]
posted by The corpse in the library at 2:40 PM on May 3, 2016 [5 favorites]
Is Sansa pregnant? I haven't seen any subtle TV-show style hints like stomach-rubbing or vomiting or feeding other people's babies to wolves.
posted by The corpse in the library at 2:43 PM on May 3, 2016 [3 favorites]
posted by The corpse in the library at 2:43 PM on May 3, 2016 [3 favorites]
Nothing has been said about Sansa being pregnant. I'm betting and hoping the show won't go there.
posted by Brandon Blatcher at 3:05 PM on May 3, 2016 [2 favorites]
posted by Brandon Blatcher at 3:05 PM on May 3, 2016 [2 favorites]
If Sansa is pregnant the only acceptable choice would be for the show to bring in a particular book-only concept that I've heard about.
Seriously, just make like Jessica Jones and get rape-baby the fuck out ASAP. Because come on.
The better option obviously would be to not have it be a thing at all.
posted by sparklemotion at 3:52 PM on May 3, 2016 [2 favorites]
Seriously, just make like Jessica Jones and get rape-baby the fuck out ASAP. Because come on.
The better option obviously would be to not have it be a thing at all.
posted by sparklemotion at 3:52 PM on May 3, 2016 [2 favorites]
I also at first thought Roose stabbed Ramsey, and then I couldn't tell. And I was like "Wait...who do I root for?" While Ramsay is the obvious "mad dog", Roose's calculating distance made him more dangerous in my mind.Basically, whoever died, I was going to be somewhat pleased with. Dead Roose leaves Ramsay unchained. Since Ramsay is like Joffrey, I think we will see him essentially self destruct because he doesn't have the control Roose did.
posted by miss-lapin at 3:57 PM on May 3, 2016
posted by miss-lapin at 3:57 PM on May 3, 2016
"Roose stabbed first" should be put on t-shirts.
posted by toomanycurls at 6:58 PM on May 3, 2016 [6 favorites]
posted by toomanycurls at 6:58 PM on May 3, 2016 [6 favorites]
Ramsay should have said "The Karstarks send their regards".
posted by EndsOfInvention at 2:44 AM on May 4, 2016
posted by EndsOfInvention at 2:44 AM on May 4, 2016
Here's an article discussing the lines of succession in GoT, which reveals that Cersei legally could get the throne if Tommen dies. I wonder what would happen if Cersei found out this information.
posted by Brandon Blatcher at 11:16 AM on May 4, 2016 [1 favorite]
posted by Brandon Blatcher at 11:16 AM on May 4, 2016 [1 favorite]
She could not legally ascend the throne unless Tyrion were dead. Westeros practices strict agnatic primogeniture.
posted by feckless fecal fear mongering at 11:28 AM on May 4, 2016
posted by feckless fecal fear mongering at 11:28 AM on May 4, 2016
Cersei is willing to do whatever it takes to solve that problem.
posted by Brandon Blatcher at 12:47 PM on May 4, 2016 [2 favorites]
posted by Brandon Blatcher at 12:47 PM on May 4, 2016 [2 favorites]
Yep - and Tyrion is currently in Essos (i.e., might as well be dead). If things were to stay "stable" in Westeros, and Tommen died, Cersei could just say that she was to be a caretaker queen, holding the throne in Tyrion's stead. She could make a reasonable political marriage, and give birth to another secret Jaime baby, and boom: Lannister dynasty secured. Because let's be honest, Tyrion would never show up to lay claim to the throne, nor does he have any kids (or would he be likely to encourage any kids to try to fight for their claim).
Tyrion likes being alive, so if/when Tyrion shows up in Westeros again, it would have to be with Dany+Dragons in a bid to reinstate the Targaryens. Which is a big enough deal that the "stability" caveat goes out the window. Even if weird succession things aren't in play, he'd be a dead man unless the power structure in Westeros is drastically altered. He's still sentenced to death for killing Joffrey, and he did straight up murder his father.
posted by sparklemotion at 2:02 PM on May 4, 2016 [2 favorites]
Tyrion likes being alive, so if/when Tyrion shows up in Westeros again, it would have to be with Dany+Dragons in a bid to reinstate the Targaryens. Which is a big enough deal that the "stability" caveat goes out the window. Even if weird succession things aren't in play, he'd be a dead man unless the power structure in Westeros is drastically altered. He's still sentenced to death for killing Joffrey, and he did straight up murder his father.
posted by sparklemotion at 2:02 PM on May 4, 2016 [2 favorites]
Cersei is willing to do whatever it takes to solve that problem.
Well, yeah. My point was that the article, which claimed to be looking at this, started with the conclusion the author wanted to see and worked backwards from there.
posted by feckless fecal fear mongering at 2:11 PM on May 4, 2016
Well, yeah. My point was that the article, which claimed to be looking at this, started with the conclusion the author wanted to see and worked backwards from there.
posted by feckless fecal fear mongering at 2:11 PM on May 4, 2016
Westeros practices strict agnatic primogeniture.
If we're putting in t-shirt orders, that's mine.
posted by unliteral at 6:30 PM on May 4, 2016 [8 favorites]
If we're putting in t-shirt orders, that's mine.
posted by unliteral at 6:30 PM on May 4, 2016 [8 favorites]
Ned had a decree signed and sealed by King Robert proclaiming him Protector of the Realm until Joffrey came of age, and Cersei ripped it up in front of all of court. I somehow doubt that the detested imp who, as far as King's Landing is concerned, murdered both the King and his own father, will be proclaimed rightful heir by anybody who would actually stand in Cersei's way. Her problem is that Coronation comes from the Faith.
posted by Navelgazer at 11:27 PM on May 7, 2016 [3 favorites]
posted by Navelgazer at 11:27 PM on May 7, 2016 [3 favorites]
To be pedantic, Cersei knew she had strong allies that would trump any claim Ned would make when she ripped up that decree.
Had Ned actually been appointed King until Joffrey came of age, he probably would have been mysteriously poisoned within the year, if that long.
posted by Brandon Blatcher at 2:00 PM on May 8, 2016 [2 favorites]
Had Ned actually been appointed King until Joffrey came of age, he probably would have been mysteriously poisoned within the year, if that long.
posted by Brandon Blatcher at 2:00 PM on May 8, 2016 [2 favorites]
Gay Of Thrones S6 E2 Recap: Daddy's Home w/ Rachel Bloom
Featuring King's Landing Dice Clay and Peter Gabriel's Sledgehammer.
posted by sparklemotion at 12:24 PM on May 11, 2016 [1 favorite]
Featuring King's Landing Dice Clay and Peter Gabriel's Sledgehammer.
posted by sparklemotion at 12:24 PM on May 11, 2016 [1 favorite]
I have have been told by a secondary source that Jon's lion cloth was not stuffed. Apologies.
posted by The Whelk at 12:52 AM on June 19, 2016 [1 favorite]
posted by The Whelk at 12:52 AM on June 19, 2016 [1 favorite]
Rar!
posted by The corpse in the library at 5:48 PM on June 19, 2016
posted by The corpse in the library at 5:48 PM on June 19, 2016
Sorry, Jon Snow warging into his wolf? Why didn't Sansa warg out while being raped by Ramsey Bolton if there's some magic in the Stark blood? That's too big a leap.
Heretofore unknown, unmentioned brother shows up at Greyjoys just as the king is crossing a rickety bridge during a bad storm? And Theon specifically saying he wanted to go home. Da-DUM!
Stuff that worries me, Hodor, curly-haired girl, and Bran all hanging out in the tree roots...what are they doing for food?
posted by TWinbrook8 at 5:02 PM on October 11, 2018
Heretofore unknown, unmentioned brother shows up at Greyjoys just as the king is crossing a rickety bridge during a bad storm? And Theon specifically saying he wanted to go home. Da-DUM!
Stuff that worries me, Hodor, curly-haired girl, and Bran all hanging out in the tree roots...what are they doing for food?
posted by TWinbrook8 at 5:02 PM on October 11, 2018
Truffles, obviously
posted by each day we work at 3:44 AM on January 17, 2020
posted by each day we work at 3:44 AM on January 17, 2020
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posted by Justinian at 6:58 PM on May 1, 2016 [20 favorites]