The Bachelorette: Week 4
June 21, 2016 9:42 AM - Season 12, Episode 5 - Subscribe

The Bachelorette travels to Uruguay. Jordan and Robby get one-on-one dates. The group date goes sand surfing. The producers awkwardly make JoJo talk about her ex, who was apparently featured in InTouch magazine at the time of filming. Derek confronts the Mean Girls clique, who predictably deny that they're mean girls. Vinny cuts the other guys' hair. Chad is missed.

Did anyone else wonder how Vinny had such a well-stocked barbershop in a foreign country? Well-stocked enough that it had issues of InTouch magazine for all the guys to read? I wonder how those got there. Interesting.

There is light in the Bachelor universe, though: Chad will star on Bachelor in Paradise this summer.
posted by kevinbelt (13 comments total) 1 user marked this as a favorite
I feel vindicated in my support for Chad after Alex's heel turn this week. Alex seems to make enemies rather easily. Maybe Chad wasn't that bad.
posted by kevinbelt at 9:44 AM on June 21, 2016 [1 favorite]

Chad was on Jimmy Kimmel last night and while he has no self awareness and blames all problems on other people ("I had no choice, I had to threaten him because he left me no choice".....) and he never apologizes, he is also really funny and does know how to laugh at himself.

Alex is a bully. He is just one of those people who will always find a target, and when one target disappears, another will emerge. And he rallies the troops, who follow along and do his bidding. What a nasty piece of work. Very unlikable. I would much rather hang with Chad (you know...hanging Chad) and eat all the meats.

I am even more convinced that Jordan is a player although I paid very close attention to his body language and eyes (everyone calls me the human bullshit detector) as JoJo was asking him about his last girlfriend and he didn't seem to tell any lies.
posted by the webmistress at 10:10 AM on June 21, 2016 [1 favorite]

I want to say I'm aggravated that Chad will be on Bachelor in Paradise but who am I kidding, that will be some fine entertainment right there.

I was all set to ask you guys if you think Luke lost the ability to smile in a very tragic accident, but then they played that outtake at the end where Derek makes fun of Luke's man boob AND LUKE ACTUALLY SMILED. IT HAPPENED. I even rewound and watched again just to make sure I wasn't imagining things. I don't know how I feel about that Luke. He's teetering on the very edge between really damn creepy and really damn sexy and I can't determine which it is.

So, I don't like Alex either. I did until last night. Talk about a Napoleon complex. What an asshole! What the hell was so egregious about Derek asking for reassurance? It's not like he begged her for the actual rose or something. That he needed a boost of confidence makes him somehow less of a man? I didn't get any of that.

I'm still not seeing any major downsides to Jordan. Well, okay, perhaps I'm getting a bit of an inkling that he's indeed a player. But like you said, webmistress, I really focused on how he reacted to JoJo's questioning during that dinner and though he seemed a bit disappointed(?) that she heard those things, he also came across pretty genuine to me. I dunno, I'm liable to be completely wrong.

Robby is really growing on me. I thought he was just a plastic vanilla Ken doll, but we actually saw his personality and intelligence this episode - I like him!

And can we all agree that that magazine was an obvious plant? I mean, the producers control all access to the outside world but there just happened to be a magazine that had a major scandal story about JoJo lying around in a completely-fabricated-for-the-episode barbershop? Sure. OK.
posted by bologna on wry at 2:16 PM on June 21, 2016

But wait, one more thing. I forgot that Robby told JoJo he was in love with her, which weirded me out more than usual. Instead of having known her for several hours total which is standard when love is eventually professed on this show, he's only known her for like 12 minutes. Slow your roll, trigger.
posted by bologna on wry at 2:29 PM on June 21, 2016

Oh also-- the sublimely awkward exit interview with Daniel and his quote about having a better chance of being struck by lightning while... ... ...shaving his face. I want to believe that even he had no idea what he was talking about there. Huh?
posted by bologna on wry at 2:31 PM on June 21, 2016

Haha. The Luke smiling thing. I too wondered if he EVER smiled. Maybe he's very self-conscious and too aware of the cameras. As I would be. I think he's afraid of coming off too weak or something. He's too intense for me personally, but I can see the appeal. Is it just me or are all of these guys so so so so impeccably manscaped and groomed and cut?? I'm kind of turned off by it. Their eyebrows are all prettier than mine. So are their nails. Every guy has a six pack. We did see them getting spa facials and all that. It must be nice.

I have never watched BiP but I may have to this time ;)
posted by the webmistress at 2:43 PM on June 21, 2016

Haha the eyebrows. Go back and look at Alex in the confessional. His brows were *intricate*.

Probably got them done at Vinny's barbershop. Ha.
posted by kevinbelt at 5:09 PM on June 21, 2016

haha! You can bet I'm scoping out everyone's eyebrows next episode. I agree their manscaping looks entirely too fussy for my taste. There's nary a rogue body hair amongst the whole lot. Speaking of which, when the hell did chest hair become a bug rather than a feature?
posted by bologna on wry at 6:52 PM on June 21, 2016

When I heard Roger say, when he was talking about when his friend died and so he moved to a new town and 'ended a 3 and a half year relationship' red flags exploded in front of me. You end a relationship because you are incompatible or the person is an asshole. Not because your friend died... So then I did some sleuthing and... can I say spoilers here? I've never been in a fan thread like this
posted by 17.5002 at 8:42 PM on June 22, 2016

Thank you for asking - no spoilers! If it hasn't aired yet, we don't get to talk about it. :) But glad you joined in the conversation.

I seem to recall Robby said that thing about breaking up with his then girlfriend because his friend's sudden death made him stop and take stock of his life. That life is fleeting and he didn't want to waste any more of his time pursuing and/or nurturing things that didn't seem to give him satisfaction. And I guess his relationship fell into the 'meh' bucket, so he chucked it. I dunno, it sounded entirely plausible and not weird to me?
posted by bologna on wry at 1:41 PM on June 27, 2016

(Robby not Roger, sorry) Chad posted on Instagram on June 20 a picture of himself kissing contestant Robby Hayes’ ex-girlfriend Hope Higginbotham - he is asserting that Robby dumped his girlfriend just to be on the show. Apparently he hunted her down to find out. Chad is also saying there are others on the show who have girlfriends.
posted by 17.5002 at 6:59 PM on June 27, 2016

Chad Johnson Instagram
posted by 17.5002 at 7:25 PM on June 27, 2016

So basically Chad, being his ever charming and affable self, is now trying to take the others down so he doesn't look as bad in comparison? Sounds pretty much in line with what we know of him! That's not to discount what he says, though, I bet there is truth to it. Wonder if she finds out... (don't tell me!)
posted by bologna on wry at 8:15 AM on June 28, 2016

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