FanFare

This week... it's slightly possible that maybe it could occur that Trump will be arrested soon, and he seems to be taking it "well." The fallout from the failure of Silicon Valley Bank continues. And Now: For St. Patrick's Day, Local News Did What They Always Fucking Do. The main story is on timeshares (on Youtube, 26 minutes), or as they're sometimes rebranded now, "Vacation Clubs," or "Vacation Ownership Plans." People are pressured to buy them on vacation, salespeople have diminished responsibility when they lie about them, and 85% of timeshare buyers come to regret their purchase, which are often subject to a "non-cancellable perpetuity clause," that can be an outright burden on the people they're left to in estates if they don't fire a disclaiming document within nine months. As the show tells us, timeshares suck, and companies that claim they can get you out of timeshares suck more. The show welcome's back John's "wife," Wanda Jo Oliver, to tell us about her new "company," Timeshare Exit², which "has over 9.3 billion customers, and a 200% satisfaction rate!" [more inside]
posted by JHarris on Mar 20, 2023 - 9 comments

This week from the White Void of Sad Facts--The shootings in Atlanta of eight people, six of them Asian women, and the terrible response from police authorities. And Now: Even During A Pandemic, Local News Cannot Be Trusted With St. Patrick's Day. Main story (22m): plastic. Think we live in a golden age of recycling plastic? Think again: less than 9% of plastic made gets recycled, and over half of all plastic ever produced was made since 2005. How did we get to this point, when plastic recycling has been promoted for decades? [more inside]
posted by JHarris on Mar 22, 2021 - 7 comments

A St Patrick's Day pub crawl is already harrowing, but it becomes even more so when aliens strike. [more inside]
posted by miss-lapin on Mar 13, 2020 - 1 comment

This week:

• Trump fires Secretary of State Rex Tillerson.
• Putin wins reelection as President of Russia to no one's surprise, ensuring horrible threats, poisoned opponents and meddling in foreign elections for foreseeable future.
• And Now: Local News Cannot Be Trusted With St. Patrick's Day
• Main Story: Mike Pence, the hyper-fundamentalist, hyper-intolerant Vice President in the Trump Administration, and the one person in it Trump cannot fire. His opposition to gay rights is well known, but, as Oliver admits, he has a cute rabbit named "Marlon Bundo." Pence has a book out, A Day in the Life of the Vice President, about his rabbit. LWT is putting out another book, about a different rabbit named Marlon Bundo, A Day in the Life of Marlon Bundo, where a boy rabbit falls in love with another boy rabbit. (See inside for more.)

The Mike Pence segment is on LWT's official YouTube channel. [more inside]
posted by JHarris on Mar 19, 2018 - 15 comments

Over the past 10,080 minutes....

• "President Trump, two words that continue to sound bad together, like 'Horse Pope,' or 'Dr. Oz.'" Trump meets with German Chancellor Angela Merkel for the first time, whom he denigrated often on the campaign trail. He refused to shake her hand, which was almost as weird as that hand-pull thing he does when he shakes hands.
• Trump also doubled-down on claims that Obama tapped his phones, claiming as a source a "talented legal mind" on Fox who turned out to be noted conspiracy theorist Judge Andrew Napolitano. Even Fox News backed away from the claim. Fareed Zakaria described Trump's behavior on CNN by using the word "bullshit" and variants of it several times.
• And Now: Morning News Shows Celebrating St. Patrick's Day Literally The Only Way They Know How.
• Main story: The Federal Budget and Trump's plans for it, which are predictably terrible.
• And Now: A Special St. Patrick's Day Moment From Fox & Friends.
• Finally... Bolivian Traffic Zebras. Bolivian Traffic Zebras. People in Zebra costumes helping traffic in Bolivia. Oliver asks, what situations wouldn't be made better by a helpful person in a zebra costume, and answers: nothing. To this end, LWT has posted green screen footage of a dancing zebra to their YouTube channel, for the use and wonder of all.

[more inside]
posted by JHarris on Mar 20, 2017 - 4 comments

This week: Elections in Israel go again to PM Benjamin Netanyahu's Likud party. --- Starbucks CEO Howard Schultz asks employees to discuss race matters with customers. --- 4th Graders in New Hampshire draft a bill to declare the Red-Tailed Hawk the official state raptor and travel to the state capital only to watch it get (metaphorically) shot down in flames. To make it up to the kids, LWT declares it the show's official bird, brings one into the studio, and airs a short promotional video. --- And Now: People On TV Honoring St. Patrick's Day In The Most Offensive Way Possible. --- Main story: Municipal violations in the US and how grievously they punish the poor. (YouTube 18m) LWT produced a short video piece against the practice, using hashtag #shutdownthefuckbarrel.
posted by JHarris on Mar 23, 2015 - 9 comments