Last Week Tonight with John Oliver: Medicare For All
February 17, 2020 12:37 AM - Season 7, Episode 1 - Subscribe

The first episode of Season Seven. Republicans claiming Trump's impeachment "changed him" (hint: it absolutely didn't), US Prosecutors steping down in protest over Trump's terrifying interference with the Roger Stone case, And Now: Another Installment of "Coming Up On 'The Doctors'," and the main story: Medicare for All, not the politics of whether it can pass, but what it is. Psst! You want a link to a metric TON of LWT clips? CLICK THROUGH FOR OVERKILL--

F.37: "Lifeus of Terryem" TERRY JONES

John Oliver's descriptions of Roger Stone's attire:
  • His dress code is "Business Scoundrel."
  • He looks like a mannequin at a department store for Dick Tracy villains.
  • He looks like a guy whose day planner just reads "Frame Roger Rabbit."
Folks, I feel like the sicophants who somehow defended Trump's interfering with Roger Stone's sentencing should be called out, their names tied to their behavior at this low point in our nation's reputation. So here they are:
  • John Eastman, Clairemont Institute Senior Fellow on Fox News: "The executive power is invested in the President. The top law enforcement officer is the Attorney General. If he wants to counteract decisions of the line prosecutor, that's his dang job! (laughs) I mean there's nothing wrong with this.
  • Jason Chaffetz, Fox News Contributor: "I like the fact that a President of the United States, when he sees injustice, he's pointing it out! That's exactly what you want to have a President do."
  • Lou Dobbs: "I don't want to hear any crap about an independent Justice Department! This Justice Department, as does everyone, works for the President! It is part of the Executive Branch!" Congratulations, remorahs! Please go directly to the Ninth Circle.
Coming Up On "The Doctors:"
  • "These seniors are taking 'Fifty Shades of Gray' to a whole new level!" (bouncing bedspring graphic in background)
  • "You called 911 for that?" "I want my ****** weed back!"
  • "Is it possible to overdose on gummy vitamins?" (swirling vitamin cloud)
  • "Burglar didn't demand cash--he just wanted to suck his toes." (shocked audience member's face)
  • "It's time to spin the Wheel of Pee!"
  • "Spin the Wheel of Poop!"
  • "The Wheel of 'Waaaaah!'"
  • "Doctor Abs is on duty and he's got the secret to banishing your back pain for good." (laughing female audience faces)
  • "I've been suffering from severe buttcheek cramps!"
  • "You want to make some quick cash? Maybe you should sell your poop!" (spinning words "SELL YOUR POOP (circling a CG model of a toilet bowl) "This could be a career!"
  • "This is crazy!" "Why people are putting anti-anxiety pills down there?"
  • "Why people are putting their vacuum down there?" "OMG!"
  • "It's time for another installment of 'Don't Put That Down There!'"
My Last Week Tonight posts are sporadic at best; it can take a lot of time to put them together (as the above should demonstrate). To make up for that, and to demonstrate my continuing mental deterioration please enjoy links to EVERY MAJOR STORY UPLOADED TO YOUTUBE SO FAR oh god so I'm actually doing this:

  • Brexit Update: UK Version
  • The Wax and the Furious, what they did with those wax statues of past US Presidents.
  • Authoritarianism and Trump's love of it
  • Drain the Swamp, a thing that Trump, himself a moldy wet creature that can naturally be found in marshland, is certainly doing
  • State Attorneys General
  • Saudi Arabia and the man who currently leads it
  • Brazilian Elections, those certainly went well didn't' they? I'm going to go stick my head in a bucket of water now
  • Brett Kavanaugh, Slime Creature #17
  • Facebook, I'm sure THIS story will tell us its topic is completely fine and not a tumor on the media
  • Felony Disenfranchisement, or, "What do you suppose happens to the rights of people who aren't allowed to vote? Oh, what do you THINK would happen?"
  • Retractions
  • Trade
  • Astroturfing, it's everywhere yeah
  • Prosecutors, they're not always righteous noble-minded agents of The People
  • Workplace Sexual Harassment, by now you should be realizing if it's in this list it's a big problem
  • Gene Editing and garage genetic modification. Remember to preserve your chromosomes in a CRISPR ha ha I'm kidding do not do this
  • Mexican Elections I forget how they turned out
  • Xi Jinping WINNIE THE POOH oops sorry I just got Metafilter blocked in China
  • Stupid Watergate II I bet we get three more of these before November
  • Guardianship
  • Rehab it's getting harder to make comments about these as they recede in memory
  • Venezuela, the only thing most voters know about it is that it proves Socialism is BAAAAAD somehow
  • Rudy Giuliani, a toad that continues to give our news media warts
  • Iran Deal, something Trump tore up so that he could put it back together again and claim victory before he threw a missile at one of their generals on a whim
  • Corporate Taxes and the ridiculous means by which they evade them
  • "Crisis Pregnancy Centers" SURPRISE actually antiabortion groups without medical certification ready to lie through their teeth to make you carry to term like it says in the Bible "Thou shalt utter horrible blatant untruths if it makes people act how you want."
  • Immigration Courts, not part of Judicial Branch as you might think, be ready for the heartwarming scene of very young (six or younger) being made to represent themselves like our founding fathers goddamn intended
  • Mike Pence, a jar of mayonnaise in a suit afraid of being left alone with a woman, hey you think this list is long? We're just getting started, I'm a hyperlinking machine--
  • Cryptocurrencies HODL HODL HODL
  • NRA TV it's defunct now which is a shame as that thing was HIGH LARIOUS
  • Italian Elections
  • Trump vs. The World he's really disliked just about everywhere that's not the US or Russia
SEASON FOUR SEASON THREE SEASON TWO SEASON ONE TAH-DAAAAAH. Not all bits are represented above, I tried to keep it focused on major stories and not all episodes' major topic are on YouTube (especially in the early seasons) but I had to link the Cookie Monster. Thanks for rea whoops my index finger just fell off oops and anothr arg my hans r becomg stbs arag gt th tape quik
posted by JHarris (8 comments total) 29 users marked this as a favorite
AH, and here it is, this week's main story, Medicare For All, which you really really should watch.
posted by JHarris at 1:17 AM on February 17, 2020 [2 favorites]

This was a pretty good episode of LWT, and I am very glad it is back, but mostly I just wanted to thank you for this very detailed post JHarris.

I hope none of the writing staff had to watch any cable news during their hiatus.
posted by the primroses were over at 8:54 AM on February 17, 2020 [4 favorites]

That's what interns are for.
posted by Ignorantsavage at 8:12 PM on February 17, 2020

Looking through the list of videos … no wonder the staff takes breaks. Doing all that is incredible.
posted by ZeusHumms at 7:51 AM on February 18, 2020 [2 favorites]

thanks, JHarris! That's a excellent post.
posted by numaner at 1:05 PM on February 18, 2020 [1 favorite]

Wow, JHarris! Thank you for all the links!
posted by mochapickle at 12:32 AM on February 21, 2020 [1 favorite]

Another thank you to JHarris for the links! My fiancée came to LWT late and this is an easy index for her to catch up.
posted by Servo5678 at 2:08 AM on February 21, 2020

I realize that a lot of these links can be found just by going to the Last Week Tonight YouTube account page, but they somehow feel more accessible here, presented as text instead of thumbnail, and I tried to provide a slight bit of context for most of them.
posted by JHarris at 10:56 AM on February 21, 2020 [3 favorites]

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