Last Man on Earth: A Real Live Wire
November 18, 2015 8:10 PM - Season 2, Episode 6 - Subscribe

Phil2 goes on strike, leaving Phil Tandy and Todd to attempt to set up solar panels alone and not be able to cope with a live wire. In other news, all the ladies but Carol have decided it's a terrible idea to have kids in this world, and Carol is not happy about that.

Okay, so my TV decided it hated this show for the last two weeks when it was airing, but I finally got around to watching this episode on Hulu and I made word count already tonight, so what the hell:

Tandy discovers that the gas is going bad when he tries to fire up the wafflemaker, and Phil2 points out that he's told everyone the gas is going to go bad soon--pretty much all gas, really. He points out that Malibu is the worst place they could be for survival, with the lack of food and supplies, and are they going to live for today or plan for the future? The majority vote is apparently to YOLO instead, with three out of four ladies saying they have no intention of having kids anyway. Phil2 is disgusted with these idiots, decides to embrace the YOLO himself, takes off his tool belt and declares himself on strike.

This leads to Phil Tandy and Todd trying to set up solar panels on their own with only the vaguest recollection of how to do this, and ending up with some live wire dancing around the patio that they have no idea how to deal with.

Carol is totally bummed that nobody wants to raise babies in the wasteland of Malibu, and goes on a campaign to harass everyone else into doing it. Gail's already missed that train and is kind of annoyed to have her masturbation time/cuddle time with a fake Gordon mannequin interrupted for this. Erica thinks of how her sister's vadge turned into a coin purse. Melissa gets the worst of it when Carol paints a picture of what her baby with Todd would look like. This does not swing Melissa to the side of having babies with no doctors available, no running water and a bunch of whale carcasses. "You want my baby to die alone?" Carol pouts, as well as doing a fake baby voice of "Mama, I want to exist." Oh, just kill me now for watching that.
Carol makes a pros and cons list on this topic. Cons: no doctors, no laws, no schools, no friends, no pets, no running water, no electricity, scarcity of cheese, no wildlife, no Sesame Street, whale carcasses, sex with old people, no baby friends, no electricity, gas going bad, no grandparents, no Disneyland. Pros: the entire pros list is a bunch of hearts with "it's a baby!" underlined. Oh god, this kind of logic just kills me. (And probably Carol and a baby if she tries it.)

Phil Tandy finally has to grovel to Phil2 for help with the live wire, and unfortunately brings up how Carol chose him, which leads to Phil2 punching Tandy. The rest of the gang actually comes to Tandy's defense (basically being all "pick on someone your own size, he's practically a girl" about it) and Phil2 locks himself in his room while they all yell outside it. Eventually Phil2 emerges and everyone else decides Phil2 should do some time in the stocks. Phil2 declines (without saying "who's gonna make me?" which is pretty much the case), mutters that the one day he leaves you all alone you nearly electrocute yourselves in your own home, and locks himself in his room again.

Eventually Phil2 emerges, FLIPS OFF THE SWITCH TO KILL THE LIVE WIRE, and announces that he's decided to leave Malibu. Good riddance, nobody wants a guy who fixes everything and then throws it in our faces anyway, gripes Gail. But before he leaves, Phil2 takes one last opportunity to beg Carol to go with him, says he loves her and he doesn't get why she's with Tandy, lists everything horrible about Tandy (he's a dolt, he's dumber than a bag of hair, he tried to cheat on you, tried to kill me, he poops in the ocean, every damn day...)

And just as he drops the L-bomb at Carol, ERIKA SAYS SHE'S PREGNANT.

Quote Corner:
"I thought he was going to take his pants off." --Gail on Phil2's dropping of the tool belt.
"You keep this up, pretty soon you'll be fisting the whole community." -Carol
"Being a tool is annoying, but it's not a crime." --Melissa defending Tandy
"What's he gonna do, punch it?" --possible solution to the live wire
posted by jenfullmoon (3 comments total)
Count me among the people who didn't know gas ever went bad.
posted by still_wears_a_hat at 6:40 AM on November 19, 2015

Huh, a post-apocalypse show touches on the the limited shelf life of gasoline. I learned this from discussions of The Walking Dead on FanFare or on the blue, and now it's one of Those Things That Irks Me. (But again, there are zombies, so you have to let go of some elements of reality.)
posted by filthy light thief at 7:33 AM on November 19, 2015

Glad they went there with the gas goes bad thing. Then frustrated as Phil2 gets his truck ready to drive away like we didn't just have that conversation.
posted by nubs at 8:36 AM on December 8, 2015

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