Mystery Science Theater 3000: THE STARFIGHTERS

January 12, 2017 7:04 AM - Season 6, Episode 12

"THE BLAZING ADVENTURE of the men and planes who rocket to the very edge of OUTER SPACE!" A young Air Force cadet, who is Actual Bob Dornan and manifestly unlikeable even then, learns to fly a new jet, but forget about that. Get ready for tons of hott thicc triple-X refueling action! Oooh god. This episode has gotten something of a legendary reputation because of its great inanity (you wouldn't BELIEVE how much refueling can be in a movie), and the pointless late-film introduction of the "poopie suit," and the riffing is pretty great. The host segments have some great moments too, with the highlight being the United Servo Academy Men's Chorus. But the movie BITES, much more than the average. YouTube (1h32m) Promo (They're playing Doom!) Premiered October 29, 1994.

Episode 612 THE STARFIGHTERS

Satellite News - Mighty Jack's Episode Review - War of the Colossal Fan Guide

Movie
Daddy-O's Drive-In Dirt - Rotten Tomatoes (Critics N/A, Viewers 6%) - Wikipedia
IMDB (1964, 2.3 stars)
Directed and written by Will Zens. Starring Robert Dornan, Richard Jordahl and Shirley Olmstead.

Notes:
Paste Magazine named it one of the show's 10 most unwatchable movies.

The title refers to the name of the jet, the hideously unsafe Lockheed F-104 Starfighter, of which mid-air refueling was a special feature.

The movie never saw wide release, and is pretty much a puff piece for the Air Force and, by its connection with the worshiped title jet, Lockheed. President Eisenhower warned us that the military-industrial complex would result in horrible horrible movies!

In the promo, Mike and the bots are enthused playing Doom. It was a popular pastime around the Best Brains offices around that time, which was noted in the Amazing Colossal Episode Guide.

posted by JHarris (12 comments total)

This week's showing as at the usual time and place, tonight (Thursday) at 9 PM Eastern, 6 PM Pacific, at https://cytu.be/r/Metafilter_MST3KClub. If you want to watch a terrible boring movie made fun of by a guy trapped in space and his robot friends, why, it'll be a place where you can do just that!
posted by JHarris at 7:08 AM on January 12, 2017

People say they have a hard time getting through this one, but I love it. It's mostly footage of jets refueling and bombing targets, but the riffs are fantastic.
posted by Servo5678 at 7:41 AM on January 12, 2017 [2 favorites]

“I think he has whiskey jet.”
posted by valkane at 8:05 AM on January 12, 2017

"And sharpen that airplane!"
posted by Mogur at 10:00 AM on January 12, 2017

It sounds odd, but this is one of the few I don't feel okay with my kids watching. The refueling scenes (which are plentiful!) are pretty much 100% sex jokes.
posted by Chrysostom at 1:12 PM on January 12, 2017 [1 favorite]

I have way too much Bob Dornan trivia... considering he graduated from my future alma mater the year I was born and he had a TV talk show in L.A. when I was working as a sidekick for a 'wacky radio morning guy' who did a lot of "Bomb 'Em Bob" jokes...
posted by oneswellfoop at 2:27 PM on January 12, 2017 [1 favorite]

ACK, I got put to sleep by AGDQ and completely missed the show! It looks like valkane handled it?
posted by JHarris at 8:47 PM on January 12, 2017

Or not, it seems. Argh.

Sorry about that everyone. It's been a weird day. We'll try again next week, how about?
posted by JHarris at 8:50 PM on January 12, 2017

No, I did. It was all good. We missed you though! So we're still on schedule for The Sinister Urge next week.
posted by valkane at 8:56 PM on January 12, 2017 [1 favorite]

No, valkane handled it, although we all mostly slept through it. I couldn't even remember a single Robert Dornan joke.

MST3KRelated: here's something about the production company that made "Mr. B Natural".
posted by oneswellfoop at 8:58 PM on January 12, 2017 [1 favorite]

Aah, that's good at least, but it means I missed the episode, and it's a favorite. Sigh.

I might watch it tomorrow around the same time if anyone can stand it wants to come out.
posted by JHarris at 9:12 PM on January 12, 2017

MST3KRelated: here's something about the production company that made "Mr. B Natural".

"Kling Film Productions"?

Unbelievable.
posted by mmoncur at 4:45 AM on January 15, 2017 [1 favorite]