225 posts tagged with mysterysciencetheater.
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Mystery Science Theater 3000: THE DEAD TALK BACK  Rewatch   Season 6, Ep 3

Rewatch! One of the sillier movies in MST's rich history, this film was made in the 60s but unreleased until shortly before the episode aired. Krasker is a self-styled occultist with a hilariously dramatic speaking style. He lives in the basement of a boarding house with a collection of "supernatural" artifacts that are laugh-out-loud funny even without riffing. For some reason the police hang on this cut-rate Sherlock Holmes' every word, and consult with him on murder cases, a premises so ridiculous that it demonstrates just how stupid it is when investigatory seances happen in real life. But mostly the movie stalls until its sub-Scooby Doo twist ending. Previously.
posted by JHarris on Mar 7, 2019 - 4 comments

Mystery Science Theater 3000: SAN FRANCISCO INTERNATIONAL  Rewatch   Season 6, Ep 14

Rewatch! What would Airplane! be if it weren't played for laughs, like, at ALL? It'd be a lot like San Francisco International, a pilot for a TV series heavily inspired by the movies that inspired Airplane!, like Zero Hour and the various Airports. So come back with us and linger in a place that most people want to pass through as quickly as possible. Previously.
posted by JHarris on Feb 27, 2019 - 5 comments

Mystery Science Theater 3000: STAR FORCE: FUGITIVE ALIEN II  Rewatch   Season 3, Ep 18

The crew of Earth spaceship Bacchus III deals with various problems, culminating with showdowns with Ken's old girlfriend out of a murder vendetta against him, and the kabuki leader of the Star Wolves himself. Two-fisted Japanese pseudo-Star Wars space adventures with surprisingly great music that was edited into near incomprehensibility by Sandy Frank Productions. It's the sequel to Fugitive Alien, which was slightly more lucid. Previously.
posted by JHarris on Feb 20, 2019 - 4 comments

Mystery Science Theater 3000: CATALINA CAPER  Rewatch   Season 2, Ep 4

Rewatch! What do you get when you cross a beach movie with a heist movie? Nothing good! It does contain a musical number by Little Richard. This movie marks the establishment of the rule that MST3K would avoid comedies, but it's still a fairly well-remembered episode from the show's classic era. With this film, we're back in Joel territory for a while! Previously
posted by JHarris on Feb 13, 2019 - 4 comments

Mystery Science Theater 3000: DIABOLIK  Rewatch   Season 10, Ep 13

Rewatch! Super-thief Diabolik steals stuff in a series of wildly implausible heists, such is his hunger to have sex in, on, or in front of valuable things with his girlfriend Eva Kant (who seems to be misnamed). It's based on an Italian comic book. You know, in that country Donald Duck is a superhero. Italian comics are weird, is what I'm sayin'. Again, this was the last episode of the classic series. Previously.
posted by JHarris on Feb 6, 2019 - 10 comments

Mystery Science Theater 3000: THE HORROR OF PARTY BEACH  Rewatch   Season 8, Ep 17

Shocking terror! Hideous and ridiculous monsters crawl out of the sea! "It had ping-pong balls for eyes!" shrieked one overacting eyewitness! Another moaned unconvincingly, "Oh the carnage, the bad costumes, the poor cinematography!" Will no one put a stop to the atrocities committed by this director and his crew? In subplot news, Pearl and Brain Guy are in ancient Rome. Previously.
posted by JHarris on Jan 31, 2019 - 7 comments

Mystery Science Theater 3000: THE GIANT SPIDER INVASION  Rewatch   Season 8, Ep 10

Rewatch! A small car cosplaying as a big big spider terrorizes a town as we continue through the best classic episodes as selected by poll. Previously.
posted by JHarris on Jan 24, 2019 - 9 comments

Mystery Science Theater 3000: ATOR THE FIGHTING EAGLE  Season 12, Ep 6

aka Ator L'Invincible. Every legend has its beginning... even the very bad ones. Long ago barbarian lawyer/surgeon/hangglider enthusiast Ator, from way back in 301 THE CAVE DWELLERS, was born, hidden away from evil guys, and raised to fight the Spider Puppet God. Along the way he falls in love with his sister (WTF), makes nookie with an evil witch lady, finds a magic mirror shield, and suffers all the personal trauma that a primitive fantasy world can dish out. The conclusion to The Gauntlet sees Dr. Erhardt fulfilling Dr. Forrester's last wish, Jonah and the bots shipped to Earth to go on the "Deep Hurting" tour, and Kinga and Max falling into the trap that Jonah spent the past five episodes building. This is the end of Season 12 of Mystery Science Theater 3000 and, unless more episodes are made, the series. [more inside]
posted by JHarris on Jan 17, 2019 - 9 comments

Mystery Science Theater 3000: KILLER FISH  Season 12, Ep 5

"The adventure that drags you in, pulls you under and tears you apart!" How pleasant. Movies would have us believe there are two major natural threats to people in the water. This movie focuses on the second one. There is a plot involving stolen jewels, but there's a reason the movie's not called TREACHEROUS THIEVES. It's the next-to-last episode of The Gauntlet, and the subplot, involving a returned Dr. Erhardt's quest to have Dr. Forrester and TV's Frank's ashes scattered while playing Idiot Control Now (Joel and the Bots' song from way back in 303 POD PEOPLE), continues, as it turns out Kinga has all of Dr. F's old experiments backed up. This is about three times as much plot as MST usually has. Add in that Jonah is doing something mysterious to help get him and the Bots out of their situation.... [more inside]
posted by JHarris on Jan 10, 2019 - 11 comments

Mystery Science Theater 3000: THE DAY TIME ENDED  Season 12, Ep 4

"The World Became a Living Hell... When Past, Present and Future Collided...." It certainly did. I'm not even sure what's going on here. Some supernovas happen, and then a family sensibly living in the middle of the desert have crazy encounters with aliens, there's some kind of time-space shenanigans, and by the end you're not sure if they're all in the afterlife or on a journey to an alien city. Solar power may have had something to do with it. Kicking off the second half of (Kinga hand gesture) The Gauntlet, this may be the most challenging film of the sextet. The highlight is a surprise host segment visit from an old friend who, after over 200 episodes, is no longer "missing".... [more inside]
posted by JHarris on Jan 2, 2019 - 25 comments

Mystery Science Theater 3000: LORDS OF THE DEEP  Season 12, Ep 3

"The ultimate underwater adventure!" Under de sea... there's scary psychic stingray monsters that control people and turn them into goo! But hey, everything's better where it is wetter, right? Not a film to show to marine biology students. It's episode three of "The Gauntlet," and a weird movie. The SOL has issues with psychic sea monsters and Kinga and Max stage a morning talk show. For fun! Episode 1203 is available on Netflix. [more inside]
posted by JHarris on Dec 12, 2018 - 17 comments

Mystery Science Theater 3000: OUTLAW  Rewatch   Season 5, Ep 19

Rewatch! There's a "counter-Earth" that's on the opposite side of the sun as the normal Earth, the same gimmick from Stranded in Space, but this one's not Authoritarian Dystopia (movie premise #218) so much as Burroughsian Otherworld Barbarian-Style Sword-and-Sorcery Made Possible Through MacGuffin (premise #245). Our many-man hero Cabot (Cabot? Cabot!) travels there through magic crackerjack prize, along with his unmanly-man professorial colleague, and must thwart the machinations of a slumming Jack Palance. Previously.
posted by JHarris on Oct 31, 2018 - 3 comments

Mystery Science Theater 3000: EEGAH  Rewatch   Season 5, Ep 6

Rewatch! A ridiculous film where an ageless giant living in the California desert, lured out by a teenage girl, finds her creepy father, her annoying boyfriend, bad rock n roll, and policeman's bullets. Eegah have bad day. We're continuing on the episodes picked out by online poll. Previously. [more inside]
posted by JHarris on Oct 25, 2018 - 6 comments

Mystery Science Theater 3000: THE SKYDIVERS  Rewatch   Season 6, Ep 9

Rewatch! And...oh hell. We're back in Coleman Francis territory. The least interesting(!) of the three films he made that MST covered, I seem to remember it's about skydiving, marital strife and murder via parachute. Honestly, I have tons of trouble staying awake through this one. I recommend coffee over alcohol. At least one of the show's best shorts, Why Study Industrial Arts?, is also in this episode. Previously.
posted by JHarris on Oct 18, 2018 - 7 comments

Mystery Science Theater 3000: GAMERA VS. ZIGRA  Rewatch   Season 3, Ep 16

Rewatch! The last of the MST Gamera movies, in which an alien bowl of Trix invades the Earth and hypnotizes folk, but fortunately they can be revived just by getting in their face and shouting "Aaaa!" at them. Another of the films tied for 50th place in our poll. Previously.
posted by JHarris on Oct 10, 2018 - 4 comments

Mystery Science Theater 3000: HERCULES AGAINST THE MOON MEN  Rewatch   Season 4, Ep 10

This rewatch is dedicated to Uranus! Hercules (actually Maciste) tries to save the land from space owls. Source of the infamous "DEEP HURTING" and "Saaaandstorm" bits. Previously.
posted by JHarris on Oct 4, 2018 - 4 comments

Mystery Science Theater 3000: WAR OF THE COLOSSAL BEAST  Rewatch   Season 3, Ep 19

Rewatch! With short Mr. B Natural. This is a case where the short overwhelms the feature. How can the Mexican stereotype-laden continuation of Glenn Manning's tale of tragic bigness possibly compete with 20 minutes of a shrill psychotic ballerina-elf hawking band equipment to unsuspecting schoolkids? Anyway, this is continuing with our tour of the decided-by-poll favorite episodes of classic MST. Previously.
posted by JHarris on Sep 26, 2018 - 7 comments

Mystery Science Theater 3000: TORMENTED  Rewatch   Season 4, Ep 14

Our decided-by-poll most-popular showings continue with a rewatch of 414 TORMENTED, part of a big tie for 50th place. God, this supernatural horror story of a lover getting revenge from beyond the grave is depressing. Some good host segments in it though.
posted by JHarris on Sep 19, 2018 - 1 comment

Mystery Science Theater 3000: TEENAGERS FROM OUTER SPACE  Rewatch   Season 4, Ep 4

Rewatch! "When we get back to our home planet the high council may well sentence you to TOR-CHAA!" Previously. [more inside]
posted by JHarris on Sep 12, 2018 - 3 comments

Mystery Science Theater 3000: THE STARFIGHTERS  Rewatch   Season 6, Ep 12

Former Republican Congressman Bob Dornan stars in this reprehensible promotional piece for both a terrible aircraft and the US Air Force. This is the episode that gave us the "poopy suit," the "song about stock footage," and the United Servo Academy Men's Chorus. This is the beginning of MST Club's encore run of the top 50+, determined by poll, of MST3K episodes. For more information, please click through. [more inside]
posted by JHarris on Sep 5, 2018 - 11 comments

Mystery Science Theater 3000: AT THE EARTH'S CORE  Rewatch   Season 11, Ep 14

Rewatch! Guys go underground and meet dinosaurs. Kinga almost marries Jonah for ratings. At the moment, this is the last episode of the show, but Season 12 has been announced! Previously.
posted by JHarris on Aug 16, 2018 - 8 comments

Mystery Science Theater 3000: THE CHRISTMAS THAT ALMOST WASN'T  Rewatch   Season 11, Ep 13

Rewatch! A cranky old land developer buys the north pole to throw Santa out, but then learns the true meaning of Christmas. It's the next-to-last episode of the season. Previously.
posted by JHarris on Aug 8, 2018 - 2 comments

Mystery Science Theater 3000: CARNIVAL MAGIC  Rewatch   Season 11, Ep 12

Rewatch! Possibly the worst movie of Season 11, and divisive. We're talking near-Manos territory here. A (sort of) talking chimpanzee engages in shenanigans, and people are surprisingly blase about it. Alcohol is suggested. At least Mark Hamill is in a host segment! Singing a song! Previously.
posted by JHarris on Aug 1, 2018 - 4 comments

Mystery Science Theater 3000: WIZARDS OF THE LOST KINGDOM II  Rewatch   Season 11, Ep 11

Rewatch! Another awful fantasy movie, one that has nothing to do with part one. In Moon 13, Kinga decides to marry Jonah for ratings. Pearl and company also drop by. Previously.
posted by JHarris on Jul 25, 2018 - 0 comments

Mystery Science Theater 3000: WIZARDS OF THE LOST KINGDOM I  Rewatch   Season 11, Ep 10

Rewatch! Come to see a bunch of cut-rate LARPers roaming the enchanted countryside, stay for Apeula. Because: Apeula. Also, we got the start of the subplot that takes us to the end of the season, Kinga forcing Jonah to marry her for ratings gold, to the dismay of Max.
posted by JHarris on Jul 19, 2018 - 3 comments

Mystery Science Theater 3000: YONGARY, MONSTER FROM THE DEEP  Rewatch   Season 11, Ep 9

Rewatch! Another giant lizard terrorizes an Asian city, although this time it's Seoul, not Tokyo. Along the way we meet a perfectly obnoxious little boy. Previously.
posted by JHarris on Jul 12, 2018 - 8 comments

Mystery Science Theater 3000: THE LOVES OF HERCULES  Rewatch   Season 11, Ep 8

Rewatch! We embark on the second half of Season 11 with everyone's favorite ancient Greek lump of flesh as he romances some ladies. Previously.
posted by JHarris on Jul 5, 2018 - 3 comments

Mystery Science Theater 3000: THE LAND THAT TIME FORGOT  Rewatch   Season 11, Ep 7

Rewatch! "'The Land That Slipped Time's Mind,' or 'The McClure That the Simpsons Forgot,' or 'T-Rex Meets U-Boat but Y?'" What first seems to be a wartime drama about Allied prisoners on a U-Boat trying to take it over changes when they discover a dinosaur-filled lost world. Previously. [more inside]
posted by JHarris on Jun 28, 2018 - 3 comments

Mystery Science Theater 3000: STARCRASH  Rewatch   Season 11, Ep 6

Rewatch! "'The Giving Away the Ending Hall of Fame' or 'Former Evangelist Marjoe Prays for a Better Movie!'" One of the few movies in MST history where the film's badness may, itself, be more entertaining than the riffs. Starcrash is a ludicrous mess, but still lots of fun, with its skimpy space bikini, texas-talking robot, giant mecha-amazon, Marjoe Gortner as a Jedi with the serial numbers filed off, David Hasselhoff as David Hasselhoff, and a seriously slumming Christopher Plummer. I could go on! [more inside]
posted by JHarris on Jun 20, 2018 - 10 comments

Mystery Science Theater 3000: THE BEAST OF HOLLOW MOUNTAIN  Rewatch   Season 11, Ep 5

Rewatch! "Tyrannosaurus Tex-Mex," or "Mexican Dinosaurs Aren't Just for Tacos!" So much of this movie is just a standard Western, UNTIL.... [more inside]
posted by JHarris on Jun 14, 2018 - 7 comments

Mystery Science Theater 3000: AVALANCHE  Rewatch   Season 11, Ep 4

Rewatch! "'Ski Faster!' or 'Half a Lanche Is Better Than None,' or 'Rock Hudson Slide!' or 'Not the Last Resort But Close.'" Rock Hudson ignores safety warnings when building his resort, and tragedy ensues. [more inside]
posted by JHarris on Jun 7, 2018 - 5 comments

Mystery Science Theater 3000: THE TIME TRAVELERS  Rewatch   Season 11, Ep 3

Rewatch! Some scientists find themselves stuck in a future time where the last civilized humans are trying to escape a barren Earth. Previously. [more inside]
posted by JHarris on May 30, 2018 - 4 comments

Mystery Science Theater 3000: CRY WILDERNESS  Rewatch   Season 11, Ep 2

Rewatch! In the year since it was first shown, Cry Wilderness has shaped up to be one of the best episodes of MST3K's eleventh season. It's an exceedingly ludicrous movie with a magic Bigfoot, one of those noble Native American spirit people, and a jerkass US Marshall who thinks nothing about breaking into someone's home and eating their food. Previously.
posted by JHarris on May 23, 2018 - 4 comments

Mystery Science Theater 3000: REPTILICUS  Rewatch   Season 11, Ep 1

Rewatch! Starting in on Season 11, Reptilicus, and the show's new premise and cast. It's been a year since Season 11 debuted, how does it hold up? Previously.
posted by JHarris on May 16, 2018 - 4 comments

Mystery Science Theater 3000: DIABOLIK  Season 10, Ep 13

AKA Danger: Diabolik. "Out for all he can take, seduce, or get away with." A master criminal steals all kinds of stuff in a series of capers, killing lots of people along the way. Oh, and he's our protagonist, yay! He's based on an Italian comic character, which might explain things a bit. Pearl plays around with a joystick she got at Radio Shack, but it breaks and sends the Satellite of Love into reentry, and she can't do anything about it. Mike and the 'bots are coming home! And with this, we have reached the end of our tour of Mystery Science Theater 3000; see inside for closing words and odds and ends. But MST Club isn't done yet! Episode 1013 is available on YouTube. Premiered August 8, 1999. [more inside]
posted by JHarris on May 5, 2018 - 16 comments

Mystery Science Theater 3000: SQUIRM  Season 10, Ep 12

"This was the night of the CRAWLING TERROR!" I have one more useful science factoid to teach you: if you run an electrical current through an earthworm, it'll become an aggressive monster and crave human flesh! But only while the current is running. This movie helpfully shows us the lethal consequences of downed power lines, which result in the depopulation of a small town. But it's a Georgia town, so, no worries. With the short A Case of Spring Fever: A film that warns us, for the sake of all mankind, to guard our tongues! Say no careless words in wishing for the absence of any petty thing that annoys you, for there may be an omnipotent spirit listening, and waiting, willing, even eager, to remove all those things from the universe just to spite you personally. To think of all the things our world has lost, all because some schmuck decided to say aloud he was annoyed with, say, immortality this week. One more film about unpleasant people in the South. Notable for containing the phrase, "You gonna be da worm face now!" The episode contains MST3K's last short, and it's one of the best. Episode 1012 is available on YouTube. Premiered August 1, 1999. One episode left. [more inside]
posted by JHarris on Apr 30, 2018 - 9 comments

Mystery Science Theater 3000: HORRORS OF SPIDER ISLAND  Season 10, Ep 11

AKA Ein Toter hing im Netz or "Body in the Web." "HAIR-RAISING! SPINE-CHILLING! One bite from a giant spider turned him into THE WORLD'S MOST HIDEOUS MONSTER with a diabolical lust to KILL!" Our movie starts out with guys hiring exotic dancers to send to Singapore, their natural habitat. The contents of the plane are so sexy that it crashes into the ocean. All passengers survive somehow and wash ashore on an uncharted desert isle. The girls celebrate by taking off all their clothes, except of course for their skin-colored bodysuits because we can't have anything risque. Then: SPIDERS! Maybe the writers were having an off week, or maybe news of the show's impending cancellation had affected them, but fans don't consider this episode a favorite. We shall enjoy it all the same. In host segments, Pearl moves her castle to the suburbs for a couple of hours. Episode 1011 is available on YouTube. Premiered July 25, 1999. Two episodes left. [more inside]
posted by JHarris on Apr 25, 2018 - 7 comments

Mystery Science Theater 3000: IT LIVES BY NIGHT  Season 10, Ep 10

a.k.a. The Bat People. "No matter how hard you pray or how loud you scream there is no escape... no escape... no escape... no escape..." A guy on a research honeymoon gets bitten by a bat and starts transforming into some kind of... bat... person as a result, sure that happens. Look out for the special surprise ending where we find out bat-person-osis is also an STD. Pearl has fun mutating the SOL crew, and Tom Servo has way too big of a mustache. An okay episode. Episode 1010 is available on YouTube. Premiered July 18, 1999. Three episodes left. [more inside]
posted by JHarris on Apr 18, 2018 - 12 comments

Mystery Science Theater 3000: HAMLET  Season 10, Ep 9

Something's rotten in Denmark. Prince Hamlet finds out his dad the king is suddenly dead, and his uncle Claudius has just as suddenly married his mum and taken the throne. Sound suspecious? So thinks Hamlet's dad's ghost, who tells him it was murder and demands revenge. But Hamlet's indecisive, so he pretends to be cray-cray so he can gather clues without alerting Claudius. While so detecting, Hamlet kills a series of people with varying degrees of intent, and holds a skull a bit. He gets revenge, but dies too. I'm going to level with you. This episode is commonly regarded as one of the less accessible ones. It's another case where the movie drags everything down. This is a low budget, black-and-white, 1961 made-for-TV German production of Hamlet, with over half the content cut for time, dubbed into English. It's a bit entertaining that a couple of the dubbers are, it turns out, Ricardo "Khaaaan!" Montalban and John "Sgt. Schultz" Banner themselves, but it's still a dry episode. It's all downhill from here! Episode 1009 is available on YouTube. Premiered June 27, 1999. Four episodes left. [more inside]
posted by JHarris on Apr 11, 2018 - 4 comments

Mystery Science Theater 3000: FINAL JUSTICE  Season 10, Ep 8

"His name is Thomas Jefferson Geronimo. His brand of justice doesn't stop at the Texas border." A Texas sheriff played by Joe Don Baker (Mitchell himself) is assigned to escort a mob boss to Italy, but the plane gets sidetracked to Malta, resulting in a series of cartoon episodes where he tries to catch him but keeps getting arrested, darn it! This is the episode where Crow and Servo destroy Goosio, beloved children's character of Malta. Episode 1008 is available on YouTube. Premiered June 20, 1999. Five episodes left. [more inside]
posted by JHarris on Apr 5, 2018 - 8 comments

Mystery Science Theater 3000: TRACK OF THE MOON BEAST  Season 10, Ep 7

"The Riding Moon Creates a Monster" From the depths of space comes a meteor, which konks a guy in the head, causing the most logical thing to happen: sometimes he turns into a lizard and kills people. A fun episode, generally enjoyed by the three main fansites we track. The movie, which contains a character named Johnny Longbow, was actually co-written by Batman co-creator Bill Finger. Episode 1007 is available on YouTube. Premiered June 13, 1999. Six episodes left. [more inside]
posted by JHarris on Mar 29, 2018 - 10 comments

Mystery Science Theater 3000: BOGGY CREEK II: AND THE LEGEND CONTINUES  Season 10, Ep 6

"The Legend Too Monstrous To Die...Surfaces Again" "Do they really exist..?" A know-it-all professor on the lookout for bigfeet out in Arkansaw tells stories of said creatures to his grad assistants, then finds way, way, WAY too much. One of the most uniquely horrible movies MST ever did. Not only is it pretty badly made, but the characters are unlikeable, there's an entire section devoted to outhouse shenanigans (thankfully shortened in the riffed version) and then, at the end--Old Man Crenshaw! In host segments, Pearl tries to spread the legend of a creature lurking around Castle Forrester--it's Bobo, of course, but that doesn't stop Hank Brain Guy Jr. from writing a country song about it. Episode 1006 is available for viewing on YouTube. Premiered May 9, 1999. Seven episodes left. [more inside]
posted by JHarris on Mar 21, 2018 - 12 comments

Mystery Science Theater 3000: BLOOD WATERS OF DR. Z  Season 10, Ep 5

a.k.a. Zaat. "Is The Monster Man...Fish...Or Devil?" "It Would Take An Atom Bomb To Wipe Out The Walking Catfish!" "WARNING! Positively no one admitted during last 15 minutes!" Sargassum! After a short, nonsensical narration of an aquarium, a scientist charts on his gigantic circular day-planner his revenge on the scientific establishment, and the world that shunned his ideas, by turning himself into a monster that he calls (but isn't) a fish, then sets about making himself a fishy mate, while very southern authorities try to stop him. We've been through some adventures, haven't we? Well here's one more, the last of what I'd call the extreme pain category of episodes. Great host segments in this one! This episode is available to watch on YouTube. Premiered June 27, 1998. Eight episodes left. [more inside]
posted by JHarris on Mar 14, 2018 - 4 comments

Mystery Science Theater 3000: FUTURE WAR  Season 10, Ep 4

"It came from the future to hunt humans." A human taken from the past to be a slave in the future escapes to the present. He's chased by a familiar-looking guy with a really big chin and his dinosaur trackers. Nicely inconspicuous, future guy! He's helped by a street-wise nun and her street gang friends. Thank you for not killing me. In the words of Crow, "You know, I could point out it's not the future and there isn't a war, but you know me. I don't like to complain." This is a particularly laughable movie, although not one of the show's more famous episodes. Episode 1004 is available on YouTube. Premiered April 25, 1999. Nine episodes left. [more inside]
posted by JHarris on Mar 7, 2018 - 4 comments

Mystery Science Theater 3000: MERLIN'S SHOP OF MYSTICAL WONDERS  Season 10, Ep 3

"In a world where magic truly exists, anything can happen." What if... someone made a movie like The Princess Bride, except instead of Peter Falk he could only get Ernest Borgnine, and instead of a charming and witty tale he had two mediocre made-for-TV fantasy-horror movies, and the kid instead of going to sleep with dreams of high adventure and romance was instead left with nightmares of demonic familiars and cursed deadly toy monkeys? In a world where schlock truly exists anything can happen. I love this one, it's all so bizarre and inexplicable. It's easy to make fun of Ernest Borgnine (hell, I do it too) but he had a long career and seemed like a good guy. In subplot land Pearl performs an experiment on Mike and co. for the Mad Science accreditation board. Taste the rainbow of fruit pain! Merlin's Shop of Mystical Wonders is available on YouTube. Premiered September 12, 1999. By the way: this was the last new episode of MST3K to appear on the Sci-Fi channel, actually showing after the series conclusion. Ten episodes left. [more inside]
posted by JHarris on Feb 28, 2018 - 7 comments

Mystery Science Theater 3000: GIRL IN GOLD BOOTS  Season 10, Ep 2

"VIBRANT... UNPREDICTABLE... She hungered for fame... the men in her life offered love, danger, excitement!" "She murdered for fame, but the price tag was too much!" Michele is a dancer with big dreams: to work as a go-go girl in a seedy restaurant called EAT. Her meteroic rise is troubled by the conflicting attractions of EAT's janitor (name of "Critter"), and Buz, EAT's drug dealer. Will she be able to keep her pretty pretty mind? Will you? There are only four Sci-Fi Channel era episodes that don't have to do with sci-fi, fantasy or horror, and this is the first. Although the horror could come from all the slime dripping off the film, which is off-putting to sane people. This episode kicks off the "Mad Scientist accreditation" subplot in Castle Forrester, which would last to the end of the show. Episode 1002 can be found on YouTube. Premiered June 27, 1998. 11 episodes left. [more inside]
posted by JHarris on Feb 21, 2018 - 17 comments

Mystery Science Theater 3000: SOULTAKER  Season 10, Ep 1

"There is no stairway to heaven." Because it turns out to be an elevator. Some dumb teens cross the Maximum Allowable Dumb line and are punished via a car crash that kills them. But wait, maybe they aren't dead? Because it turns out the Grim Reaper (Joe Estevez) is incompetent and can't leave personal issues at home. His boss (Robert Z'dar) is so going to write him up. This is a great episode, not just because the movie is goofy and the riffing excellent. This is the episode where "TVs" Frank Conniff and show creator and first host Joel Hodgson come back to visit! This is the first episode of the 10th season of MST3K, the final classic season of the show. YouTube (1h32m) Premiered June 27, 1998. 12 episodes left. [more inside]
posted by JHarris on Feb 14, 2018 - 12 comments

Mystery Science Theater 3000: QUEST OF THE DELTA KNIGHTS  Season 9, Ep 13

"In an age of swords and sorcery, one young hero holds the key to infinite wisdom--and ultimate power." Not any sorcery, actually. Somewhere in the medieval nation of Europe, a young boy is sold as a slave but bought/rescued by "Baydool," who works for the "Delta Knights," against the villainous "Vultare," who works for "The Mannerjay." They're trying to find the lost treasure of Archimedes, Leonardo da Vinci is with them--if you try to make sense of when or where this film happened you'll go crazy. Roll for initiative! This is an underrated episode I think. The movie's got a crazy premise, the settings seem like they came from a LARP, and it just opens itself to riffing, which is nice after a couple of numbing episodes. Host segments are also great, with the "Loaner AMC Crow," another of Servo's chorus performances, and Pearl doing the riffing for the first quarter of the episode. This is the end of Season Nine of Mystery Science Theater 3000. Assembled people and robots, we have entered the home stretch. YouTube (1h32m) Premiered September 26, 1998. 13 episodes left. [more inside]
posted by JHarris on Feb 7, 2018 - 7 comments

Mystery Science Theater 3000: THE SCREAMING SKULL  Season 9, Ep 12

"FREE! We Guarentee To Bury You Without Charge If You Die Of Fright During SCREAMING SKULL!" A man and his new wife move into a house. Wait, the house was owned by his previous, now dead, wife? Who died mysteriously? And the new wife has a lot of money? Can you see where this is going? With short Robot Rumpus: Clayboy Gumby and his pony pal Pokey make robots to do his yardwork, but they run amok amok amok amok. Most say the movie's extremely drab and hard to watch, but the short is excellent, both fun itself and terrific riffing fodder. The bots do not well handle the sight of the fate of their claymation brethren: "This is how it is in the real world! Horrid lumps of discharge destroy beautiful, innocent robots with impunity!" In Castle Forrester, Pearl and company try to play a bizarre joke on Mike and his contingent, resulting ultimately in the shrinking of Bobo. Hah. YouTube (1h32m) Premiered August 29, 1998. 14 episodes left. [more inside]
posted by JHarris on Jan 31, 2018 - 6 comments

Mystery Science Theater 3000: DEVIL FISH  Season 9, Ep 11

"Sink your teeth into pure terror." "Wave goodbye..." Good luck making sense of this horribly-edited movie. A fish (with tentacles somehow) is terrorizing some folk, was made by a villain, and others are trying to stop them. There's some sex in there I think too. Pearl rents the castle out as a cruise ship (what) and Mike twice incurs the wrath of the Space Dolphin empire (what). In a host segment, Crow muses about combining a shark with an octopus, making him technically the ultimate origin of the movie Sharktopus. Thanks a heap, 'bot. Promo The episode itself doesn't appear to be on YouTube. Premiered August 15, 1998. 15 episodes left. [more inside]
posted by JHarris on Jan 25, 2018 - 8 comments

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