Mystery Science Theater 3000: SWAMP DIAMONDS
April 28, 2016 2:59 AM - Season 5, Episode 3 - Subscribe

aka Swamp Women. "Branded Women! Notorious Women! Scarlet Women! SWAMP WOMEN!" "Deadlier Than the MALE!" An undercover policewoman helps other women escape from prison in the hopes they'll lead her to stolen loot. With short What to Do on a Date: A shy kid asks a girl out for a date, and they have the best time that could be depicted on-screen in 1950s America: they go to a "scavanger sale." Another of MST's best shorts, a case, like with Mr. B Natural and War of the Colossal Beast, where the short overwhelms the movie. One source claims Swamp Women was the first movie Roger Corman directed, but IMDB lists four movies he directed the year before. It's a fairly typical lurid early Corman movie, with lots of talking and padding. Corman himself is still alive and active, and although he hasn't directed in a while, he's still producing: he produced Sharktopus vs. Whalewolf just last year. YouTube (1h32m) - Rough cut - Unriffed - Trailer. Premiered July 31, 1993.

Episode 503 SWAMP DIAMONDS with short WHAT TO DO ON A DATE

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Movie: Swamp Diamonds
Daddy-O's Drive-In Dirt - Wikipedia
IMDB (as "Swamp Women," 1956, 2.8 stars)
"An undercover policewoman helps three female convicts escape from prison so that they can lead her to a stash of stolen diamonds hidden in a swamp."
Directed by Roger Corman. Written by David Stern. Starring Marie Windsor, Carole Mathews and Beverly Garland.

Short: What do Do on a Date
Daddy-O's Drive-In Dirt
IMDB (1951, 2.4 stars)
"A shy boy wants to ask out a girl on a date - but how can he know what she'd like to do, or what kind of activity would be best suited for getting to know her?"
Directed by Ted Peshak. Written by George Tychsen. Starring Robert Casey.

It turns out the short got a sequel, "More Dates For Kay."
posted by JHarris (5 comments total) 2 users marked this as a favorite
Every week, we in the Fanfare MST3K Club watch that week's covered episode of Mystery Science Theater 3000 together in a chatroom at This week's showing is tonight (Thursday) at 9 PM US Eastern Time. More (slightly outdated) information is in the Club FAQ.
posted by JHarris at 3:01 AM on April 28, 2016

There's a SEQUEL to the short?!?!? *drops everything*

The "Say, you like to do LOTS of things!" line (said in a dopey tone) is an old standard in our household.
posted by CheesesOfBrazil at 5:22 AM on April 28, 2016

Good for Kay, she could do better.
posted by Chrysostom at 9:04 AM on April 28, 2016 [1 favorite]

posted by JHarris at 6:14 PM on April 28, 2016

I stuck my head in to watch communally if anonymously, but the Sleep Fairy clonked me good with the Timezone Bat. Rewatched this earlier and it did make me laugh. I do think the cheesiness of the piece obscures the quality of the advice in the short. Forget "the movies", find something Kay would like to do and do it together. Can't fault that! Words of advice for young people!

I'm currently (accidentally on purpose) mid-SUPER DRAYGON, but will reserve comments for a later date.
posted by comealongpole at 6:49 AM on April 29, 2016

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