From low life hit men to haute couture fisticuffs, this week our not-so-merry band of journeymen killers-for-hire bounce from frying pan to fire as they find a way to turn even the acts of sleeping and buying a new shirt into high stakes emotional battles of life, death and of course...FASHION. hon hon hon.
The blast from the past continues as our would be assassins delve into the sultry Suggestions District, on the lookout for an infamous bugbear femme fatale and her terrible secret about the Emperor. From outré vice to the inner circles of Payola's aristocracy, the mission to end the Emperor blunders ahead, but what illicit ears listen from the city's dark shadows?
While the original Rude Tales gang waits out quarantine in Stirfry’s pocket (no food), here's a tale from Cordelia's mysterious past: COME AT THE KING, a miniseries set 500 years before the events of Rude Tales!
"Regarding that principle, the Buddha often said to the bhikùus, “You should know that the Dharma which I speak is like a raft. The raft is used to cross the sea of suffering — birth and death. Before you have ended birth and death, you use the raft in cultivation. Once you have ended birth and death, you should put the raft aside. If you do not put the raft aside you have an attachment." -The Diamond Sutra
Chickens come home to roost as our heroes juggle obligations old and new. Backs are stabbed. Deals are made. Loyalty is pledged. The long arm of the law doesn't bend, and destiny (or destruction?) tightens its grip. Meanwhile....the mountaintop awaits.
One loose thread hunts another in the shadowed labyrinth of Scrum North, the erstwhile temple-cum-Kenku bandit hideaway. Blades in the dark. Betrayals remembered. Promises made. A new power dips a toe in the water. Can we escape our past? Would we even want to?
This episode of Rude Tales of Magic was recorded live in front of a studio audience. Also, it's non-canon so anyone ESPECIALLY STIRFRY can die.
An uncouth cadre of daredevil saviors waylay our heroes on their journey to destroy the bandits in the north, but perhaps this rambunctious new sect has exactly what our friends so desperately need even if they themselves do not know they need it? Secrets are divined! Hidden romance uncovered! The past comes back to haunt! Tomorrow, in this petty pace, creeps day to day!
Froggie went a courtin' and when he did ride, DANGER must surely follow. Our heroes find themselves in the good graces and iron clutches of one Mr. Scrum Fabulous, the gadabout flycatcher and never not plotting crime lord of Soaking Valley. What choice will they make regarding his offer they can't refuse? Must all reunions be brief? Must all goodbyes be Irish? Answers inside! [more inside]
Live free or die? Eat or get eaten? Are you in, or are you out? It's a wild night in the Soaking Valley County Jail as our heroes fight for their freedom and their lives when a jailbreak gets out of control. Exits must be taken. And choices? Ain't so such thing as easy ones, and they all gotta get made, babeee.
Captured! Desperate! And...Deadly? The gang races, and riddles, to save their friends from the completely reasonable consequences of their own actions. Missions are accepted and secrets are, you guessed it, revealed. Can justice be averted? Can the group dynamic ever heal? What's YOUR Hungry Boy Score? All this and more, NOW!
Doo doo goes in toilet / And so does little pee pee / And you will be the one to put / Both in it 👏👏
We got a Kebin situation.
Exhausted and fed up, our heroes battle and cajole their way through the last leg of the Teenage Woods and its ridiculous denizens. But what lies beyond? After all this, can you go home again? And what might you find there? Can our heroes bear the revelations of the Dawn house? Can you?
The gang is whisked away by a malevolent, though romantic, force who will pry every secret from their most hidden hearts! Can they survive his psychological gauntlet? What truth will out? This was the first ever live show, recorded in Brooklyn New York.
When a rich, protestant elf gets epsteined (murdered) at the posh Lindseyngham Manor, our heroes must become the crack investigators they were always meant to be. Listen as they ruthlessly interrogate witnesses, brilliantly analyze evidence, and work as a team to explore all the potential angles in this well-structured whodunit!
It's a family reunion...of sorts, when our heroes are introduced to their mysterious host in the heart of The Nest. Who or what is She? What dark trials must our heroes best? What will be the horrible price of their freedom? If sweat is the pee of the skin, is spit the pee of the mouth? ALL WILL BE ANSWERED in... Mother Knows Best!
Metaphorically at-sea and literally in-woods, our heroes struggle to survive encounters with the natives and wildlife of the Teenage Forest. Thirsty provincial royalty, swarms of altered beasts, secret societies, ancient mad scientists, and more await our heroes in the dark hollows of the great woods on this night. But will they all live to see the dawn?
The beginning! What a fine place to start. We meet our nascent heroes in the throes of the beginning of the sunset of their scholastic salad days. Demon possessions, ominous warnings, and threats from Hell itself auger ill and trouble. Can they matriculate from danger to destiny? Can they graduate magna cum...adventure? [more inside]