Mystery Science Theater 3000: THE INCREDIBLE MELTING MAN Rewatch Season 7, Ep 4
Rewatch! One of MST3K's Double Adjective Man movies, the others being The Amazing Colossal Man, Teenage Cave Man and Amazing Transparent Man. (There's also Indestructable Man, The Brute Man, The Projected Man and, of course, The Pumaman.) An astronaut returns to Earth and is affected by something that makes him kill people, kind of like a slightly more competent Monster A-Go-Go. In the host segments, Crow shepherds his movie Earth Vs. Soup to completion and through focus groups, a sequence inspired in no small part by Best Brains' experiences in getting MST3K The Movie made. Previously.
Mystery Science Theater 3000: NIGHT OF THE BLOOD BEAST Rewatch Season 7, Ep 1
Rewatch! A dead astronaut comes back down to Earth, not-dead but infested by aliens who plan to use his body as a spearhead to invade Earth. Is it just me or is that a weird plan? Also with a short, Once Upon A Honeymoon, which naturally has to do with telephones. We re-enter the series after The Movie, without Frank and now with new regular Pearl Forrester. It's the beginning of Season 7, only six episodes long and the last hurrah of the show on Comedy Central. Previously.
Doom Patrol: Dada Patrol Season 3, Ep 5
Armed with slightly greater understanding of what's going on than they had at this time last week, our heroes set out to infiltrate a group of art terrorists or something, a vague mission that leads to decidedly tangible results.
Doom Patrol: Undead Patrol Season 3, Ep 4
Our heroes become brain-hungry zombies, in what is very probably the most normal event to happen in this week's episode.
Doom Patrol: Dead Patrol Season 3, Ep 3
Dorothy and Larry come home to a problem they can't solve alone. But not to worry! The Doom Patrol makes new friends, who are obviously not in any way there to lay the groundwork for a spinoff series, clearly.
Doom Patrol: Vacay Patrol Season 3, Ep 2
Our heroes head to a resort (that's seen better days) in search of a recharge, unaware that a threat is waiting for them there...and has been waiting for a really, really, *really,* REALLY long time. [more inside]
Doom Patrol: Possibilities Patrol Season 3, Ep 1
Yay! [more inside]
Mystery Science Theater 3000: THE CREEPING TERROR Rewatch Season 6, Ep 6
Re-rewatch! Time to watch a carpet eat half a small town again! The great thing about this movie is nothing. The great thing about this episode is that the movie is so goofy and nonsensical that it's watchable on its own just to try to figure out whatever the hell is coming next. The riffs add onto that. This is unquestionably in the worst-of-the-worst pile, a bona-fide cinematic un-chievement. Previously and again.
Mystery Science Theater 3000: THE ATOMIC BRAIN Rewatch Season 5, Ep 18
Rewatch! An old rich lady decides to use her considerable resources, including her own mad scientist and a nuclear reactor in her basement (wow, really?), to have her brain swapped into the body of one of three younger women. The eventual result? Let's just say she better hope she can develop a taste for Meow Mix. Previously.
Mystery Science Theater 3000: THE BRAIN THAT WOULDN'T DIE Rewatch Season 5, Ep 13
Rewatch! A brilliant scientist is thought of as "mad," and only because he saves his girlfriend's severed head when she is killed in a car crash, then keeps it alive by setting it in Neck Juice (TM), allowing her to befriend the terrible monster he keeps in his basement while he goes out trying to murder women to provide her with a donor body. But really, is that "mad?" Okay. Yeah, on further reflection I guess it is. Oh, and he has an assistant with his own weird issues. This is Mike Nelson's first episode as host of Mystery Science Theater 3000. Previously.
Possessor follows an agent who works for a secretive organization that uses brain-implant technology to inhabit other people's bodies - ultimately driving them to commit assassinations for high-paying clients. [more inside]
Mystery Science Theater 3000: ATTACK OF THE THE EYE CREATURES Rewatch Season 4, Ep 18
As the repeated "THE" in the title should warn you, this is an exceptionally bad movie, perhaps one of the worst. The premise is, aliens are attacking and the only ones who know are the local teens, who take it upon themselves to destroy the sinister threat from outer space by turning on their cars' high beams. There's a subplot(?) about a couple of army guys watching things via surveillance, and another concerning a pair of roommates. This is the episode that gave us the line, "You see folks, they just didn't care." Previously. BTW, tonight is MST Club's Halloween show!
Mystery Science Theater 3000: BEING FROM ANOTHER PLANET Rewatch Season 4, Ep 5
Rewatch! This episode is something of a sleeper, its subject is a Film Ventures International film (so, weird, irrelevant opening and closing sequences) in which it turns out an alien is buried in a mummy's tomb that causes people to rot when it touches them, and the alien is trying to get back its magic space jewel that someone stole from it. Previously
In 1983, a cosmonaut is involved in an incident in space and crash-lands back to the Soviet Union. A nervy psychiatrist (Oksana Akinshina, Lilya 4-ever) is recruited to help him recover from his amnesia about the incident in this sci-fi horror movie. [more inside]
Doom Patrol: Wax Patrol Season 2, Ep 9
The team tries to save Dorothy (and the world) from the Candlemaker.
Doom Patrol: Dad Patrol Season 2, Ep 8
Niles and Dorothy set out to have one perfect day together; Jane and Larry try to appease Kay.
Doom Patrol: Dumb Patrol Season 2, Ep 7
Our heroes are infected with a magical virus that gives them bad ideas, which is mostly surprising because I assumed they already had been infected with a magical virus that gives them bad ideas. It would have explained a lot. Anyway, here we go.
Doom Patrol: Space Patrol Season 2, Ep 6
Traumatized by her confrontation with Baby Doll, Dorothy runs as far away from home as she can get. Meanwhile, Larry meets someone with an unexpected insight into his plight.
Doom Patrol: Finger Patrol Season 2, Ep 5
Vic tries to make amends with Roni, Larry reaches out to his son, and Dorothy makes a new friend.
Doom Patrol: Sex Patrol Season 2, Ep 4
Flex Mentallo returns, and tries to use the power of Muscle Mystery to free Rita of her inhibitions.
Doom Patrol: Pain Patrol Season 2, Ep 3
Rita, Larry and the Chief fall into a gruesome Clive Barker meets Takashi Miike nightmare, as meanwhile Vic begins a bittersweet romance and Cliff tries yet again to reunite with his family, all somehow without inducing complete tonal whiplash. Plus! A super depressing Nick Cave song montage!
Doom Patrol: Tyme Patrol Season 2, Ep 2
The Chief tries (and fails) to win Cliff's sympathy, and Rita devises a plan.
Doom Patrol: Fun Size Patrol Season 2, Ep 1
Our heroes return, but they have a small problem. Plus! A new addition to the family -- a strange little girl named Dorothy -- tries to find a place among the Doom Patrol, and she's bringing a few friends. [more inside]
Mystery Science Theater 3000: POD PEOPLE Rewatch Season 3, Ep 3
Re-rewatch! Four different subplots kind of meander into orbit with each other in this dubbed French/Spanish movie. Movie A: poachers in the woods encounter and break the eggs of an unworldly creature. Movie B: singers on a trip in the woods have a deadly run-in with that creature. Movie C: a lonely young boy befriends another creature of the same species. Movie D: the boy's father noisily conflicts with the lead singer from Movie B. It's another episode from a time in the show's history when almost every episode became a classic. But as for the movie itself... (O.K. sign) It stinks! It's as disjointed as it was because originally it was supposed to just be a horror movie, but then when ET came out a hasty story adjustment was made to try to get some of those cute alien movie dollars. Previously and also previously
Mystery Science Theater 3000: THE SLIME PEOPLE Rewatch Season 1, Ep 8
Rewatch! It's like a zombie movie but not, and from before that became a genre! You might consider it ahead of its time, or you might consider that zombie movies were never all that to begin with. It's another first season episode, when the guys and robots were still finding their feet and/or hoverskirts. Previously. [more inside]
Mystery Science Theater 3000: ROBOT MONSTER Rewatch Season 1, Ep 7
Rewatch! We're baaaack.... A alien invader (guy in a gorilla suit with a fishbowl on his head) called Ro-Man destroys everyone on Earth except for a family that lives in walking distance of his cave (which has a bubble machine in front of it). The family tries to thwart Ro-Man's attempt to wipe them out, until Ro-Man gets a crush on the family's teenage daughter. At what point on the graph do "must" and "cannot" meet? In the end it's all a dream had by a comic-addled young boy. Up until this point MST had shown bad movies, but this was the first truly transcendent example they did. Some have called it the worst movie ever made. Enjoy! Also has two Radar Men From the Moon shorts. Previously [more inside]
Mystery Science Theater 3000: THE CRAWLING HAND Rewatch Season 1, Ep 6
Rewatch! An astronaut crashes to earth and dies, all except for his hand (or hand and forearm, depending on the shot). It strangles people then hooks up with a teen to do more stranglin'. In the end it gets eaten by a cat, saving the world. Good kitty! This is an important episode in that it's the first one that sets up the "style" of the show in almost all later episodes, the opening going directly into the theater tunnel, and Joel explains the premise, really for the first time on cable. Also, the movie features the song Surfin' Bird. Previously. ----- In other news, for the extent of the pandemic, the MST Club video room will be open between shows with a playlist of as-broadcast MST episodes, funny YouTube finds, and other special appearances, for bored social distancers dropping-in. "Enjoy!"
imdb: In 1993, the Search for Extra Terrestrial Intelligence Project receives a transmission detailing an alien DNA structure, along with instructions on how to splice it with human DNA. The result is Sil, a sensual but deadly creature who can change from a beautiful woman to an armour-plated killing machine in the blink of an eye. [more inside]
Mystery Science Theater 3000: THE CORPSE VANISHES Rewatch Season 1, Ep 5
Rewatch! Bela Lugosi plays a mad scientist who extracts brain juice from young brides to keep his wife young, because that's a thing that works. Come on, if it did Trump would be trying to suck it out of people's heads with a drinking straw. Both this and the previous movie are among the oldest films MST ever did, made in 1942. There's another Commando Cody short too, and some classic sketches, such as the robots saying bedtime prayers and the haircut bit. Previously
Mystery Science Theater 3000: THE MAD MONSTER Rewatch Season 1, Ep 3
Rewatch! An amiable handyman is turned into a furred killer by virtue of a syringe of Wolf Juice, in service to that diabolical process called science. When it is proclaimed of our our somewhat-hairy, yet still humanoid, victim that he has "become a wolf," it is a profoundly silly moment. Comes with Pt. 2 of Radar Men From The Moon. Previously [more inside]
Rewatch! Evil Dr. Krupp, aka "The Bat" continues his plans to steal a treasure from the body of an Aztec mummy. This time he builds a robot to do it for him, which, why? Sell the robot, get more money than the treasure is worth! No matter. He's opposed by the virtuous Dr. Almada and the mummy, Popoca, itself. Also riffed is the first part of Commando Cody serial Radar Men From The Moon. Previously
Mystery Science Theater 3000: THE CRAWLING EYE Rewatch Season 1, Ep 1
Rewatch! Ambulatory eyeballs with tentacles descend from space and menace the inhabitants of a mountain town. It's the first cable episode again, and as before, it's kind of a tough row to hoe. Previously [more inside]
When a mysterious Signal triggers an event that sparks the end of the world, Aubrey Parker is trapped in her dead best friend's apartment, with a single cassette tape labelled "THIS MIXTAPE WILL SAVE THE WORLD."
A family's Christmas takes a strange turn when they awake to find themselves trapped inside and begin receiving mysterious instructions through the television.
Mystery Science Theater 3000: POD PEOPLE Rewatch Season 3, Ep 3
Rewatch! Deep in the northwestern woods somewhere is a house in which lives a lonely boy with way too many pets. His newest pet, however, is from a species with serious aggression problems. Oh also there are poachers in the woods. Oh and there's some singers in town who are vacationing in those same woods. It stinks! Pod People, shown early in Season 3, is a hugely iconic episode of MST3K, and "It stinks!" quickly became one of the shows many, many catchphrases. And I think we can all agree: the pet alien from this movie would make a better president than our current one. Previously.
Mystery Science Theater 3000: PARTS: THE CLONUS HORROR Rewatch Season 8, Ep 11
Rewatch! Considering the political reality of the USA right now, this movie's almost charming with how the villain is an evil Senator's brother, who runs a farm for stupid 70s people, clones of "important" folk, you know, like senators, to serve as living sources of spare body parts. Especially hilarious is the pseudo-Orwellian culture of the farm, which is like a sinister community college. Previously
Mystery Science Theater 3000: HOBGOBLINS Rewatch Season 9, Ep 7
Rewatch! Plush toys with the ability to make people's fantasies a reality encounter some teenagers with severe issues, and the result is supposed to be a comedy. You knew it was coming. Any list of the best MST episodes invariably covers most of the worst movies, meaning we're back here again, at the extremely 80s, extraordinarily tawdry film (in the sense of being an oily coating) known to those unfortunate enough to have experienced it as HOBGOBLINS. To watch it is to feel like your brain is floating in a tub of slime: enjoy! Previously
The Twilight Zone: Blurryman Season 1, Ep 10
While working on the set of the new The Twilight Zone, writer Sophie Gelson (Zazie Beetz) is haunted by a mysterious Blurryman. [Season finale] [more inside]
Tree Gelbman discovers that dying over and over was surprisingly easier than the dangers that lie ahead.
Mystery Science Theater 3000: THE DAY TIME ENDED Season 12, Ep 4
"The World Became a Living Hell... When Past, Present and Future Collided...." It certainly did. I'm not even sure what's going on here. Some supernovas happen, and then a family sensibly living in the middle of the desert have crazy encounters with aliens, there's some kind of time-space shenanigans, and by the end you're not sure if they're all in the afterlife or on a journey to an alien city. Solar power may have had something to do with it. Kicking off the second half of (Kinga hand gesture) The Gauntlet, this may be the most challenging film of the sextet. The highlight is a surprise host segment visit from an old friend who, after over 200 episodes, is no longer "missing".... [more inside]
Keisha's wife is dead. Or she's supposed to be. One day, Alice shows up in the background of a TV news story, staring directly at the camera. And then again. And again. Already riddled with anxiety, Keisha abandons her old life to become a truck driver, looking for the wife she no longer believes is dead and investigating the clues she left behind that may point to a larger, more sinister mystery. Based on the podcast of the same name by Joseph Fink (Welcome to Night Vale).
Mystery Science Theater 3000: LORDS OF THE DEEP Season 12, Ep 3
"The ultimate underwater adventure!" Under de sea... there's scary psychic stingray monsters that control people and turn them into goo! But hey, everything's better where it is wetter, right? Not a film to show to marine biology students. It's episode three of "The Gauntlet," and a weird movie. The SOL has issues with psychic sea monsters and Kinga and Max stage a morning talk show. For fun! Episode 1203 is available on Netflix. [more inside]
Could you trust a jury of your peers with your life? The contestants of a mysterious death game must make harrowing decisions as they strategize for survival in this psychological sci-fi thriller. [more inside]
An alien lifeform consumes everything in its path as it grows and grows. [more inside]
A scientist sends a man with extraordinary psychic powers to hunt others like him. [more inside]
Mystery Science Theater 3000: TRACK OF THE MOON BEAST Season 10, Ep 7
"The Riding Moon Creates a Monster" From the depths of space comes a meteor, which konks a guy in the head, causing the most logical thing to happen: sometimes he turns into a lizard and kills people. A fun episode, generally enjoyed by the three main fansites we track. The movie, which contains a character named Johnny Longbow, was actually co-written by Batman co-creator Bill Finger. Episode 1007 is available on YouTube. Premiered June 13, 1999. Six episodes left. [more inside]
Mystery Science Theater 3000: THE SPACE CHILDREN Season 9, Ep 6
Kids serve the telepathic bidding of a Blob from Space to sabotage military weapons. The twist: the Blob is a good guy! With short Century 21 Calling: At the Seattle World's Fair, everyone is excited about PHONES. You'll be able to record frequently-called numbers onto little plastic cards! An uncommonly ridiculous movie and short combo. Warning: contains Uncle Fester in shorts! This is another episode that's not on DVD, and probably never will be. Vimeo (1h32m) Premiered June 13, 1998. 20 episodes left. [more inside]
Doctor Who: Oxygen Season 10, Ep 5
"Space... the final frontier. Final because it wants to kill us. Sometimes we forget that, start taking it all for granted — the suits, the ships, the little bubbles of safety — as they protect us from the void. But the void is always waiting." - The Doctor [more inside]
Doctor Who: Knock Knock Season 10, Ep 4
Bill is moving in with some friends and they’ve found the perfect house – so what if it’s strangely cheap to rent, and the landlord is a little creepy? The wind blows, the floorboards creak and the Doctor thinks something is very wrong. What lurks in the strange tower at the heart of the building – and why can’t they find any way to enter it? [more inside]
Mystery Science Theater 3000: THE BRAIN THAT WOULDN'T DIE Season 5, Ep 13
"Fantastic! Weird! Horrifying!" "Alive...Without A Body... Fed By An Unspeakable Horror From Hell!" How gifted does a doctor have to be that, when his GF is decapitated in a crash, his thought is, "I can fix this!" Two-for-two on a bad idea streak, he goes out and tries to kill attractive women so he can get her a new chassis. This movie teaches us that not only are free-standing heads capable of speech, they can communicate with horrible monsters. It's Mike Nelson's first episode as host, and boy, they change a lot of things with this episode, including updating the set and changing the door sequence! It's a pretty good episode riffing-wise, too. YouTube (1h31m) Premiered October 30, 1993. Did you know there is a stage musical based on the film, "Head: The Musical!" (Vimeo 1h40m) [more inside]
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